Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

What’s so pathetic about these “food challenges” is that he spends so much money on this shit when in reality you can get a $5 box from Taco Bell, throw in a few dollar menu items, and have just as much if not more food than these elaborate “10 taco box” challenges for probably a quarter of the price. I know he’s too exceptional to realize this, but it makes these challenges even funnier to watch. Especially when he brags about the amount of tacos or the price of his pizza with $25 worth of toppings.
It's never his money, so he couldn't care less.
 
It's never his money, so he couldn't care less.

Keep in mind that a portion of Josh’s money literally grows off trees and he still manages to somehow fuck that up, too.

He’s just an amazing person, I really mean that in the best way possible. Life has presented him with nigh-unfuckupable resources and opportunities. Time and time again, he stumbles his way into the perfect, most unpredictably stupid ways to fuck them up. I don’t know anybody who can do it like he can.
 
Keep in mind that a portion of Josh’s money literally grows off trees and he still manages to somehow fuck that up, too.

He’s just an amazing person, I really mean that in the best way possible. Life has presented him with nigh-unfuckupable resources and opportunities. Time and time again, he stumbles his way into the perfect, most unpredictably stupid ways to fuck them up. I don’t know anybody who can do it like he can.
I feel like people acknowledge he's retarded, but are nevertheless constantly underestimating that he's a retard.
 
It's never his money, so he couldn't care less.
Isn't that kind of a proven psychological thing? Like if money isn't earned, people don't really value it all. It's probably a factor in how lottery winners are usually no better off after 5 or 10 years or something. Cobra is kind of like that, which is amusing because he always talks about how he wants to win the lottery. He'd spend that money so fast lol.
 
Isn't that kind of a proven psychological thing? Like if money isn't earned, people don't really value it all. It's probably a factor in how lottery winners are usually no better off after 5 or 10 years or something. Cobra is kind of like that, which is amusing because he always talks about how he wants to win the lottery. He'd spend that money so fast lol.
It's not even that, he spends everything until he has nothing left. Even if it was your money to spend but not really your own money, I think most people would at least save enough to pay rent.

He's like a dog chasing a squirrel across a road, he's unable to think beyond five minutes into the future and just buys booze.
 
It's not even that, he spends everything until he has nothing left. Even if it was your money to spend but not really your own money, I think most people would at least save enough to pay rent.

He's like a dog chasing a squirrel across a road, he's unable to think beyond five minutes into the future and just buys booze.

It’s not that he can’t invest in his future, so much as he lacks the consequences associated with not doing that so he doesn’t feel the need to care.

Clint will always bail him out, his SSI will always come in, and no matter how many corners he cuts or how minimal an effort he puts into things he makes, people will always buy them.
 
Finally, we got to hear Cobra's solution to the trans bathroom situation for the 50th time.
It really seems like his answer is that you need to show HIM what's going on in between your legs before you go into the bathroom at Buffalo Wild Wings. Hey, if you want a job done right, you gotta do it yourself.
 
New Spooky Tuning:

 
It’s not that he can’t invest in his future, so much as he lacks the consequences associated with not doing that so he doesn’t feel the need to care.

Clint will always bail him out, his SSI will always come in, and no matter how many corners he cuts or how minimal an effort he puts into things he makes, people will always buy them.
Reminds me of a classic cobes moment. Where he's saying he doesn't have enough for his electric bill and how he might not be streaming as much. His usual spiel. But then 20 minutes someone paypals him 40 dollars. He says something along the lines of "sweet I have enough for a food hack video". The chat calls him out and he says "well my electric bill is 65 so that wouldn't even have covered it."
 
He's like a dog chasing a squirrel across a road, he's unable to think beyond five minutes into the future and just buys booze.

It’s because he doesn’t regulate his ADHD with medication. He constantly seeks dopamine hits. It’s part of the problem, if the low dopamine levels aren’t regulated properly with people like Josh, they’re predisposed to engaging in impulsive behaviour to constantly chase dopamine. They’ll usually prefer short challenges and big rewards because of the fixation on getting the dopamine hit as quickly as possible. It’s why people like Josh are predisposed to addiction, too. His self medication actually makes things significantly worse, because weed will decrease dopamine levels in your brain and play a significant role in fucking up your brain’s reward system. His alcohol addiction will produce similar effects along with being a depressant.
 
king cobra wojak twu.jpg

Cobes doomer zoomer boomer coomer wojak TMWU
 
Here's Kobes' streams from Friday:

*the original was potato quality so the archive is too.
Start:
Drinking Bud Light Platinum. Long live Ozzy. Talks about his glasses. He got a care package with stickers, alcohol, cigarettes, delta 8, MGS4, Ozzy glasses, magnum and a shirt. Shills tactical soap.
1:31:
Reads the note it says TWU. Shout out to Cobra's dry spell.
2:12:
Shills tactical soap. Reads the second note. It's a fuck rape care package. Kobes hates rapists and sick fucks more than be hates his trolls.
3:22:
Shows off the shirt. Complaining about Bonfire shutting down his store.
4:26:
Going to wear this new shirt for a couple of days. Puts on the shirt.
6:01:
Tries on the Ozzy sunglasses. Says he can still see barely. Talks about Ozzy's biography.
7:54:
Talks about the shooters he was sent.
8:40:
Talks about abortion. Drinking peanut butter flavour whiskey. Not an alcoholic.
11:01:
Says he might lower the price on the staff. Immediately changes his mind and says he'll just make more wands. Looks up Bryan Adams lyrics. Mixes Bud light platinum with his peanut butter whiskey. He bought tactical soap and will do a review of the new scents.
13:06:
Fuck rape! Sex is not a need it's a want. Contributing to rape culture.
13:35:
Vocal cover Bryan Adams. Everything I do I do it for you. No copyright infringement intended. Bragging about how good he sings and plays guitar.
14:17:
Got the ingredients for sneaky snake floats. Moderation is key. Talks about Ozzy and addiction. Not an alcoholic. Waiting patiently for his of age goth girl of his dreams.
16:30:
Restarts the song for 2 seconds. Bud out the lighters. Says he heard this song first on family guy.
17:35:
Back to song. Now he's doing the vocal cover. Keeps pausing the song to drink though.
22:33:
Calls himself a show off. Says if he wanted to show off he would do all of me by John legend.
23:10:
Gets his Ozzy shades doe doing all of me. Says his eye sight is a thousand times better since his eye surgeries. Talks about his glasses. Moar Bud light platinum. Dry spell cope and tactical soap.
26:44:
Not trying to copy Ozzys style. Says he's a goth hippie civil rights activist. He hopes his ava grawnday music is listened to by generations of people. Wants green tint Ozzy glasses. Talks about his next drink combination.
31:13:
Talking about being the class clown in school. He got bullied all his life but he's made something of his life. Wants to be as famous as Ozzy. Talking about people using his content and image and not sending him any money, except Exhumed. People who were bullied grow up to be twice as successful as the people who bullied them.
37:31:
Drank vodka and watched a Val Kilmer movie. Blm, abortion, gun rights, lgbtq rights. Doesn't support chimos.
40:00:
Bragging about bring able to sing like John Legend.
42:26:
Trolls. Talks about his ring and Ozzy knuckles. Black flame to light my green smoke. Cradle of filth tattoo. Talks about not being allowed to listen to cradle of filth. Talks about sneaking alcohol from his parents before going to s school dance.
46:28:
Talks about alcohol. Tries the pink lemonade vodka. Shills his PO box for people to send him tobacco and alcohol. Delta 8. He keeps having coughing fits.
53:49:
Gothic oppression.
54:40:
Unexpected sneeze. Tries his drink combination and drools all over himself. Not an alcoholic. Delta 8.
57:10:
Talks about his new album. Leaves to blow his nose.
1:00:15:
Plays a song from his new album and explains the lyrics. Gender relations. Ava grawnday sound. Shout out to Cobra's dry spell.
1:06:55:
Saving some shooters for later. Ricky and Morty.
1:10:03:
Back to his song for 2 seconds. Picks up his guitar and talks about his guitars. Guitar shredding.
1:21:48:
Star spangled banner.
1:23:04:
Puts his song back on for 2 seconds. Tries out moar liquor he was sent in the care package. 80%British. Fuck rape gender relations rant.
1:25:46:
Guitar shredding.
1:28:30:
Shout out to Cobra's dry spell. Better to be a simp than an incel. Guitar shredding. Back to his song for 2 seconds and explaining the lyrics. Talks about his new album, plays a track a fan sent him.
1:34:40:
Delta 8. 21 and up.
1:36:35:
Talking about being famous on social media. Talks about his cobra tattoo.
1:39:32:
Guitar shredding. Talks about his guitar. Brags about how good he can play guitar. He just mooches around drunkenly for a while.
1:52:50:
Talking about making a sneaky snake floats in his potion time glass. Shows off his glass and complains about his Tee Spring getting shut down. Gets the ingredients for his float.
1:56:47:
Makes a sneaky snake float using a hunting knife wtf? Tries to open his beer with his anti rape shirt. Demonstrates how to open a beer with a lighter. He would serve this and his chicken Alfredo to an of age lady if he was trying to impress. He gets all giggly when he tries the float. Booyakasha
2:09:00:
Really enjoying that float. Mumbling to himself. Talks about how good his float is.
2:14:09:
Falling asleep.
2:14:44:
Talks about Ozzy. Finishes his drink. Talks about his drink. He's mumbling and very drunk.
2:46:39:
Washes his glass. Talks about his drink. Coat and hat on. Boots on.
2:24:40:
Moar alcohol. 21 and up, 18 is as low as he goes. Trolls.
2:27:30:
Wand in packet. Fan sent him smokes. Smoking psa. Shows off the shades he was sent.
2:29:39:
Piss break
2:31:15:
Returns. Shout out to Cobra's dry spell. Drunken mumbling.
2:34:30:
John Legend vocal cover. Fucking finally!
2:39:13:
Sunglasses back on.
2:40:05:
Mr Crowley vocal cover. Kind of, he's just coughing up his delta 8 while the song plays. Looks like a fish trying to breath.
2:45:45:
Does some magic. Ends the stream abruptly.
Long live the King.PNG
Start:
He has Taco Bell. Reads off his order. Straight into the Yukbang. He's just fisting tacos into his mouth.
6:30:
Holding a taco like a harmonica TWU
11:20:
Mumbling about his food
17:25:
Borps and mumbling about his food while holding the box on his shoulder like a boom box.
19:19:
Drunk vacuuming TWU
21:30:
Mountain Dew baja blast. No mango fiesta.
Mumbling about his food. Fuck the haters, he's doing shit with his life.
25:09:
Puts on a Bruno Mars song for 2 seconds. Talks about doing other vocal covers. Can't let the haters get to you. Sunglasses on and Delta 8.
28:18:
Coughing.
30:10:
Falling asleep
31:00:
Asleep
32:58:
Wakes up. Talks about his food challenge while falling asleep.
35:50:
Not an alcoholic. Talks about his food challenge.
37:34:
Falling asleep
38:17:
Vocal cover Bruno Mars. Stops to cope about his dry spell.
39:49:
Back to the vocal cover. Stops to adjust his hat. Back to the vocal cover. He keeps holding his face while he's singing.
46:17:
Delta 8 and Coughing. Mixes cinnamon liquor with his baja blast.
49:50:
Changes his glasses again. Talks about his drink combination and his food challenge.
51:44:
Smoke break
55:10:
Returns.
55:52:
Vocal cover. Can't help falling in love with you.
59:53:
Talking about his food challenge and falling asleep.
1:00:44:
Vocal cover Hurt. Falling asleep, singing to his drink combination and holding it like it's the ring from LOTR.
1:04:52:
Bragging about how good he can sing. Back to the vocal cover.
1:08:43:
He's done
1:10:45:
Drops his drink catches it and wakes up.
1:13:10:
Trying to pull up some Beatles lyrics. Let it be vocal cover.
1:18:00:
Talking about his singing.
Start:
Describing a video he's watching. Still drinking and very drunk. Puts the video back on for 2 seconds.
1:30:
Looks like he's going to fall off the chair. Sitting in silence. Back to the video.
3:22:
Baked beans and hot sauce is wicked. Talking about hot sauce. Back to the video.
8:25:
Talking about his food challenge. Back to the video.
10:57:
Moar alcohol. Fuck the trolls. Talking about beans and hot sauce. Back to the video.
12:40:
Talks about his drink. Talks about the video. Back to the video.
13:40:
Talks about the hot sauce. Back to the video.
14:44:
Fuck the trolls. Back to the video.
16:00:
Trolls, society, spicy hot sauce. Back to the video.

Circle of protection for Warlord:
 
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