Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

  • 🔧 At about Midnight EST I am going to completely fuck up the site trying to fix something.
Hate to say it but Cobes is acting like an ungrateful little bitch. All of his problems are his own doing and he's complaining that Climt (who, to give him credit, supports his son pretty much no matter what, even if more than a little counterproductively) and Josh gets pissy just because his dad didn't want to take the family out with him sloshed to the gills. I guess he just doesn't get how he looks when he's hammered.
 
What a fucking ride was last night….

Cobes drinks a bottle of vodka in under 90 minutes in preparation for Birthday dinner with family at the Olive Garden. Does some shitty karaoke, pounds some bud lights, and signs off.

Cobes comes back on even more wasted —bud light in hand — and is now talking shit on Clint who refused to take him to Olive Garden. Claiming he will show them what ‘drunk looks like’, all the while crying about what kinda father doesn’t wanna celebrate his boy’s birthday. Proceeds to drunkenly ramble for well over an hour, revealing a few insights suspected but unknown, such as:

- Clint actually lathes the wands and Josh thinks he is trying to steal his wand business. It means Clint acknowledges his magic.
- He was taken to a psychiatrist when younger, due to his rantings about Cobra Demons, Angels, and Magic. Claims Clints looked at him like a crazy motherfucker and claimed it was his Asperger’s causing these beliefs.
- He believes he is the next Ozzy
- He thinks his dad should be proud of his accomplishments as a ‘Cult Leader’, “New World Leader’, and famous YouTuber
- One of his sisters may be a carpet muncher
- Clint may have drank in college, so Cobes insists he was an alcoholic banging college chicks

Cobes then signed off after nearly nodding off.

He then came back on a few hours later, still drunk to have a go at Clint. Pretty much just insulting him for the exact same time as his previous stream (1:23:36). Between insults at Clint and veiled suicide threats, he cried about how his birthday has been ruined — and def not his fault. Don’t worry though, some paypigs gave him some cash at the end of the night and cheered him right up!

Who wants to bet he will be drinking this morning?
 
Did anyone get that Gothie video from last night called "He needs help" or something like that? I didn't want to look away from the Cobra dumpster fire to watch the Gothie dumpster fire. As usual, she deleted it.
 
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People demanding group home and therapy and rehab have their hearts in the right place but none of the above would help at all. He would be kicked from any group home placement within a month. Rehab would do nothing for Cobra because he lacks any sort of introspection or inner dialogue. The first therapist he would see would attempt to point out his flawed logic, or something undeniably fucked up that he did in the past, and he would refuse to believe it. In fact he would just get mad at the therapist and start spouting off bullshit.

Even for an addict, his reasoning following Clint's bday rejection was next level retarded. "Why couldnt he just ignore it", "why doesn't he just say 'That's my boy kingcobrajfs!'", "He's jealous of my fame". Anyone else, even an addict in their worst moment, would feel at least a little bad, if not totally depressed over being this level of fucked up. Too drunk to go out with your family is a "soft" rock bottom, not that Josh recognizes any of this. He will be awake today around noon drinking more because he got paypig money.

Edit: Cobes really just tried to say he only had "one or two drinks" before Clint showed up and he wasn't even that drunk. I'm guessing he thinks an entire 750ml of vodka counts as one drink. Boglim math.
 
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Did anyone get that Gothie video from last night called "He needs help" or something like that? I didn't want to look away from the Cobra dumpster fire to watch the Gothie dumpster fire. As usual, she deleted it.
she didn't delete it yet, its the stream thats on her channel now. the title is changed to 'zzzzz cute pizza boy' right now and she's asleep.

edit; it's deleted
 
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Who's the bigger retard; Josh for producing nearly 4 hours where he repeats the same 4 sentences over and over again in a slur, or me for having watched all of it in it's entirety.
People demanding group home and therapy and rehab have their hearts in the right place but none of the above would help at all. He would be kicked from any group home placement within a month.

Also this. How people still think "group homes" are more or less adult daycare centers you can just drop grown men off at so long as they're a tad retarded is ridiculous. He'll be on the streets way before they can force him in any kind of tard barn.
 
But you know what? he's not an alcoholic... like come on: 2 drinks and clint gets all upset? fucking jealous cause 31k subs, toobz, youtube celebrity-- NOT ALCOHOLIC, he can quit anytime.

btw, i haven't watch him in some time now and these abrupt pauses he does (the ones that look really fucking bad like permanent brain damage) are happening way more often and seems that nobody's telling him that, like fucking clint for example.
 
Also this. How people still think "group homes" are more or less adult daycare centers you can just drop grown men off at so long as they're a tad retarded is ridiculous. He'll be on the streets way before they can force him in any kind of tard barn.
They are kinda tard daycare centres. I know people who work in them and it’s a mixed bag.

Some tards are pleasant enough. They cannot take care of themselves and their family can’t afford them. They don’t really cause any problems and fit well into the homes.

Then there are the tards that turn those places into hell. They refuse to wear clothes, scream at the top of their lungs for hours, attack each other, make a scene everywhere they go. My friend ended up quitting the job due to the constant headaches and stress.

A group home for Cobes is a naive dream. He would not follow the rules and could technically leave on his own volition.

Unless he gets some court ordered treatment or guardianship this is going to be the norm. Enjoy the ride, toobz
 
They are kinda tard daycare centres. I know people who work in them and it’s a mixed bag.

Some tards are pleasant enough. They cannot take care of themselves and their family can’t afford them. They don’t really cause any problems and fit well into the homes.

Then there are the tards that turn those places into hell. They refuse to wear clothes, scream at the top of their lungs for hours, attack each other, make a scene everywhere they go. My friend ended up quitting the job due to the constant headaches and stress.

A group home for Cobes is a naive dream. He would not follow the rules and could technically leave on his own volition.

Unless he gets some court ordered treatment or guardianship this is going to be the norm. Enjoy the ride, toobz
I saw a documentary from the BBC about something called a "wet house" where apparently they provide winos and other assorted nonfunctioning alcoholics a place to live and just get shitty on booze all day and night. Might be worth the plane ticket for Clint to ship the Boy to England, I mean come on dood he's like 85% British anyway

edit: pretty good doc
 
All the options for Cobes short of him somehow realizing the errors of his ways (lol yeah right) would involve huge sums of money from Clint. Rehab, therapy and group homes aren't cheap if you're not a shiftless hobo.

Lucas Werner got put into a tard/care home courtesy of the state because he was a nutty ragman but the actual cost is $4k USD/month
 
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