Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

['Ole Dente]

"Umm do you realize Josh is a stalker, RACIST, transphobic piece of shit? He murdered puff for fun. Stop defending him."

“I am justified in my extreme hatred for a retard because he does and says retarded things.” wtf do these people expect him to do? Shave up and go get a job? He’s blown the fuck out he can’t even wipe his own ass.

 

[el bandito loco]

just to be clear toobs, I don't think he would kick some trolls ass, I just like the idea of it. he's got like zero reflexes anymore though, that being said I think a lot of these reddit faggots that seethe over him probably do it because they see some of themselves in him. I think he'd probably have a fairer chance than you'd expect. I'm sure they probably also too get their asses kicked by can openers and fast food bags. I just inherently think one of the funniest possible routes for Josh's life to go is to end up like those delinquent stereotypes in anime like the beginning of Yu Yu Hakusho where for whatever reason characters just walk around town and get into street fights all the time like it's a normal everyday occurrence. Cobes vs reddit alogs in physical battles in the streets of casper wyoming would just be hilarious. plus you can imagine if he won a fight how insane his confidence would skyrocket and that would also lead to funny shit.
in all honesty he's probably too far gone and the booze, duster, isolation and lack of movement will probably take him out before he could ever have the chance for a redemption arc of any kind, let alone a hypothetical troll slayer one.

 

['Ole Dente]

just to be clear toobs, I don't think he would kick some trolls ass, I just like the idea of it. he's got like zero reflexes anymore though, that being said I think a lot of these reddit faggots that seethe over him probably do it because they see some of themselves in him. I think he'd probably have a fairer chance than you'd expect. I'm sure they probably also too get their asses kicked by can openers and fast food bags. I just inherently think one of the funniest possible routes for Josh's life to go is to end up like those delinquent stereotypes in anime like the beginning of Yu Yu Hakusho where for whatever reason characters just walk around town and get into street fights all the time like it's a normal everyday occurrence. Cobes vs reddit alogs in physical battles in the streets of casper wyoming would just be hilarious. plus you can imagine if he won a fight how insane his confidence would skyrocket and that would also lead to funny shit.
in all honesty he's probably too far gone and the booze, duster, isolation and lack of movement will probably take him out before he could ever have the chance for a redemption arc of any kind, let alone a hypothetical troll slayer one.

a cobra is slow to move but quick to strike trol

 

[Slim Boglim]

just to be clear toobs, I don't think he would kick some trolls ass, I just like the idea of it. he's got like zero reflexes anymore though, that being said I think a lot of these reddit faggots that seethe over him probably do it because they see some of themselves in him. I think he'd probably have a fairer chance than you'd expect. I'm sure they probably also too get their asses kicked by can openers and fast food bags. I just inherently think one of the funniest possible routes for Josh's life to go is to end up like those delinquent stereotypes in anime like the beginning of Yu Yu Hakusho where for whatever reason characters just walk around town and get into street fights all the time like it's a normal everyday occurrence. Cobes vs reddit alogs in physical battles in the streets of casper wyoming would just be hilarious. plus you can imagine if he won a fight how insane his confidence would skyrocket and that would also lead to funny shit.
in all honesty he's probably too far gone and the booze, duster, isolation and lack of movement will probably take him out before he could ever have the chance for a redemption arc of any kind, let alone a hypothetical troll slayer one.

I'm not afraid to admit cobra would beat my ass. A fight between me and cobies would be entirely one-sided on account of the fact I couldn't fight back without getting arrested because hitting an autistic person is, in fact, illegal.

 

[Lake Cresva Diver]

"Umm do you realize Josh is a stalker, RACIST, transphobic piece of shit? He murdered puff for fun. Stop defending him."

racist and transphobic? wtf i love kingcobra now

 

[CluntSlonders]

So do you guys hate bitesize, and lemon line and boglim chronicles too?

 

[HumbleServantOfRizzler]

For some reason I thought of the video of cobes jerking off on chaturbate and laughed that before cumming he said “666”. I bet Ozzy would do the same thing doodt.

 

[Slim Boglim]

For some reason I thought of the video of cobes jerking off on chaturbate and laughed that before cumming he said “666”. I bet Ozzy would do the same thing doodt.

The funniest thing about the chaturbate video is that he went live beforehand specifically to tell people he was gonna go jerk off on chaturbate and where to find him and then logged off to go jerk off. Then people rushed to chartubate and watched him jerk off and treated like it was an own on cobra. He basically just went “hey sometimes I jerk off on chaturbate. Actually I’m gonna go jerk off right now” and people rushed to chaturbate and watched him jerk off and were like “ohhhhh we fuckin got him now!” I mean it certainly reflects poorly on cobra but it also kind of reflects poorly on the people who thought “oh hell yeah” at the thought of watching an autistic guy beat off. Don’t get me wrong I’m guilty of watching too but I never acted like it was a win against cobra. The opposite really I sat there for a good while just thinking “good god what the fuck am I doing?”

The dude whips out his peen in discord calls, he totally gets off on the idea people are watching him bog-beat his bog-meat so I don’t doubt the idea of his trolls visiting his chaturbate to watch made him a “happy cobra”. That said him hyping himself about being “a badass who hates rape” while jerking is one of the most insane, and hilarious, things he’s done. Definitely up there with baby talking his toilet and really goes to show just how fucked his mind is

Edit: also led to this total banger Booyaka

 

['Ole Dente]

The funniest thing about the chaturbate video is that he went live beforehand specifically to tell people he was gonna go jerk off on chaturbate and where to find him and then logged off to go jerk off. Then people rushed to chartubate and watched him jerk off and treated like it was an own on cobra. He basically just went “hey sometimes I jerk off on chaturbate. Actually I’m gonna go jerk off right now” and people rushed to chaturbate and watched him jerk off and were like “ohhhhh we fuckin got him now!” I mean it certainly reflects poorly on cobra but it also kind of reflects poorly on the people who thought “oh hell yeah” at the thought of watching an autistic guy beat off. Don’t get me wrong I’m guilty of watching too but I never acted like it was a win against cobra. The opposite really I sat there for a good while just thinking “good god what the fuck am I doing?”

I’ve been told that he beat his meat while whispering “ooooo i wanna rape it”

 

[NoosJunki]

3/1/7. thats our cobes!

I wanna see a Double Dragon/Streets of Rage romhack featuring Cobes except every enemy is a different inanimate object he's tried to fight before. The can opener would be the final boss, and his final form would be as an ELECTRIC can opener

 

[UncommonParlence]

I’ve been told that he beat his meat while whispering “ooooo i wanna rape it”

He was definitely talking about rape but it was more along the lines of "fuck rape, oooh, fuck sickos. I hate ooh rape. Fuck raaape!"

It was more disturbing than it sounds. The first vid I saw the lower half was cropped out so I was spared.

Then someone posted the unedited and my eyes got graped by cobe's grape demon.

 

['Ole Dente]

He was definitely talking about rape but it was more along the lines of "fuck rape, oooh, fuck sickos. I hate ooh rape. Fuck raaape!"

It was more disturbing than it sounds. The first vid I saw the lower half was cropped out so I was spared.

Then someone posted the unedited and my eyes got graped by cobe's grape demon.

yeah, that’s uh

that’s a thing

 

[AnOminous]

I can def see him bullying people he perceives as weaker though. Small children, other retards, small little animals (like puffts), maybe even women if felt he could get away with it and wouldn’t lose.

I don't think he intended to harm that lizard, he's just too much of a retard to take care of an animal. Whoever sent it to him is more to blame than he is. He seemed genuinely broken-hearted about it, even though it was his own retardation that killed it. I don't really get much in the way of malice out of this guy, unlike for instance Cyrax, who is a real piece of shit.

The exaggerated hatred for someone who is basically a harmless retarded weirdo is really over the top. These reddit fags need to calm the fuck down and just laugh at the sped antics.

 

[niggers]

He seemed genuinely broken-hearted about it,

i dont know dude, he really didn't seem that upset in the last video. i got "oh thank god my one tiny responsibility in life is gone" vibes from it. and this is from a guy who'll usually give cobes the benefit of the doubt.

even if its not a conscious thought, i think his bogbrain is somewhat relieved that he can go back to spending 150% of his income on doordash, instead of merely 130%. he mentioned hitting clint up for lizard-feeding money before, and i'm sure that wasn't pleasant.

 

[PetiteFeet]

So do you guys hate bitesize, and lemon line and boglim chronicles too?

I don't outright hate Bitesize. Yes he's a weirdo who supports Josh by buying shit from him but I think he's the least trollish of the three. BogChron I've soured on since he started including troll comments or shitty memes that don't add anything to the clip. LeninLime I outright hate for aloging/being associated with active alogs.

 

[CluntSlonders]

You guys never answered my question about museum privilege being certified sicko. Museum told josh he got a DUI and wasnt a registered sex offender

 

[Slim Boglim]

I don't outright hate Bitesize. Yes he's a weirdo who supports Josh by buying shit from him but I think he's the least trollish of the three. BogChron I've soured on since he started including troll comments or shitty memes that don't add anything to the clip. LeninLime I outright hate for aloging/being associated with active alogs.

My main gripe is that he’s called “bitesize” but all latest content is multiple hours. Bitesize Cobra Vids? more like Supersize Cobra Vids am I right, fellas?

 

[DocHoliday]

i dont know dude, he really didn't seem that upset in the last video. i got "Oh thank god my one tiny responsibility in life is gone" vibes from it. and this is from a guy who'll usually give Cobes the benefit of the doubt.

even if it's not a conscious thought, i think his bogbrain is somewhat relieved that he can go back to spending 150% of his income on doordash, instead of merely 130%. he mentioned hitting Clint up for lizard-feeding money before, and I'm sure that wasn't pleasant.

He hyper fixates on one thing at a time. As soon as the mead making began, the Puff updates and videos basically disappeared. I think the novelty of Puff had worn off, and he realized that Puff wasn't that interesting anymore and he would have to take care of Puff and spend money on him for a long time. He cries for dead celebrities, but so far hasn't been choked up or shed a single tear for Puff. He is probably more angry and embarrassed at the fact that everyone was right about him not being able to properly take care of the lizard.

 

[Archie Bunker]

/r/kingcobrajfs is a revenge subreddit. It's not about laughs or memes they want revenge. Josh is an evil man who needs to pay for his misdeeds. You can't "explain the reality of what happened" to a retarded man with the brain of a 12 year old. BTW harrassing him about puff will only make him want to get another one to spite the subreddit
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It’s so funny to me that this faggy fucking subreddit is doing every awful thing that the general public has been told that the big scary Kiwi Farms does, while most Farmers are just pissed that these faggots are ruining all of the fun by touching, not looking.
Can you imagine paying to take out an ad in some shitty thrifty nickel paper in some shitty town in Wyoming, with some shitty image you made to try to stir up shit between a complete retard and his equally retarded elderly friends about their daughter, then bragging to other faggots online about how much you spent to do it while they internet-clap and tell you how cool you are? Because r/kingcobrajfs can.

Oh man how the hell did I forget the can opener

Sorry for double post, but even him fighting the can opener, which was fucking hilarious every single time, got fucking ruined by some faggot buying him an automatic can opener in 2021. Why can’t people just let funny be funny?

 

[DocHoliday]

Sorry for double post, but even him fighting the can opener, which was fucking hilarious every single time, got fucking ruined by some faggot buying him an automatic can opener in 2021. Why can’t people just let funny be funny?

He has an automatic can opener? Did he smash it or something because he is back to using the old school ones? It's so funny watching him try to figure out how to use them properly. It's like watching someone try to figure out a puzzle.