Lolcow KingCobraJFS / Josh Saunders - Amateur musician, YouTube Streamer, wandmaker, and self-proclaimed "sexy goth badboy". Perpetually circling the drain.

Josh Fucks up Cooking Bacon 3 Times In A Row, The Quick Cut.
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Amazing.

You couldn’t write shit like that. I laughed at how he keeps on fucking trying and reassuring us he’s going to ‘watch it like a hawk’. Literally burned the fuck outta it everytime. Most I can figure is all the grease and butter turn into a very questionable deep fryer.

Also, I never get over how he equates grease with flavor. Literally saving the shit to pour onto a sandwich
 
Literally burned the fuck outta it everytime. Most I can figure is all the grease and butter turn into a very questionable deep fryer.
I don’t think he’s accounting for the bacon crisping up after it cools down as well as the ad hoc deep frying action of his sludge pan.
 
Also, I never get over how he equates grease with flavor.
It is flavor. I have a little plastic container I use to collect bacon grease for use as an ingredient in things like peas or cornbread.

Granted I keep it refrigerated and don't just let it sit out rotting while insects infest it, and I clean my pans and skillets after use, but he has the very basic concept of bacon grease right.
 
Josh Fucks up Cooking Bacon 3 Times In A Row, The Quick Cut.
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Wait, that’s spam? For a second I thought he was just staring at two slices of bread. Did he slice it lengthwise?
 
I don’t think he’s accounting for the bacon crisping up after it cools down as well as the ad hoc deep frying action of his sludge pan.
He seems to think you need to put oil or butter in the pan for everything, which is crazy considering bacon is more than half fat. The blackness isn't even from the bacon being burnt, it's from the country crock burning before the bacon can cook.
 
His pan looks like something you would find in a fallout game.
You ever see those youtube videos where people restore old shit by machining new parts, hitting it with an angle grinder, and belt sander? They always doctor up how fucked up the item is for the thumbnail by covering it in dirt or photoshopping a ton of rust. His pan looks like one of those thumbnails.

ETA: actually it might look worse. The funniest part is it's a 4$ walmart pan, just fucking buy a new one.
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also, clint better get the boy a new phone before this kitchen<->smoking den with boiling pans of grease and cooking on a gas stove while blackout drunk dance results in a local headline of; "WORST FIRE IN CASPER IN 150 YEARS: 43 DEAD AND 34 INJURED AFTER TRAILER GOES ABLAZE"
 
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Did tannis finally get fed up of laundering the cobra venom out of his clothes? I feel like there has to be a reason for him wearing the same shirt for 3 months other than the usual laziness.
That boglim belly probably has something to do with it. He should hit up Custimized Girl for some cool cobra merch instead of chaturbating and doordashing all his Clint bux away.
 
Josh Fucks up Cooking Bacon 3 Times In A Row, The Quick Cut.
View attachment 7595584

also, clint better get the boy a new phone before this kitchen<->smoking den with boiling pans of grease and cooking on a gas stove while blackout drunk dance results in a local headline of; "WORST FIRE IN CASPER IN 150 YEARS: 43 DEAD AND 34 INJURED AFTER TRAILER GOES ABLAZE"
"Me and my Dad and the doctors at the skin grafting clinic have decided we're not going to pour molten hot Country Crock beer bacon grease over my lap anymore"
 
Amazing.

You couldn’t write shit like that. I laughed at how he keeps on fucking trying and reassuring us he’s going to ‘watch it like a hawk’. Literally burned the fuck outta it everytime. Most I can figure is all the grease and butter turn into a very questionable deep fryer.

Also, I never get over how he equates grease with flavor. Literally saving the shit to pour onto a sandwich
If he didn’t want grease to splatter, he could go the even easier route and cook bacon in the oven, but I imagine he’d still keep it in too long and burn it anyway (and possibly forget to turn the oven off). Cobes is like the final boss of awful cooking, and makes Jack Scalfani look like Gordon Ramsey.
 
Did tannis finally get fed up of laundering the cobra venom out of his clothes? I feel like there has to be a reason for him wearing the same shirt for 3 months other than the usual laziness.
What if he's like a cartoon character and just owns many different pairs of the same shirts? Man's only needs his Ozzy and Cradle of Filth shirts doodt and his whole closet is filled with them
 
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