- Joined
- Sep 25, 2019
2. Zone 1 Part 1
This strange, highly empty location appears to be all there is to the world. A few dots of jungle green sprout from the emptiness, resembling bacterial cultures. The swamp green pattern behind them appears to just be a splotch, but I have a minor theory regarding what the shape of it might be I'll get to in a bit.
Five locations can be interacted with. Zone 0, 1, 2 and 3 are the first four.
The fifth and final location, The Room, is unlike the others, and its text is colored in strong red.
Though I'm pretty sure its not a reference, I felt the need to state this game does not predate The Room or its initial surge of popularity, though it does predate Adult Swim's first screening of it in 2009.
Attempting to enter anywhere other than Zone 0 or Zone 1 simply gives us this message.
The Batter arrives in a very green location. Its a bit hard to tell by the screenshots, but there's a mild downpour present as well.
Traveling up from our location or arrival brings us to a train station, which is apparently named Elsen. We can also speak with one of the residents, who looks a lot like me when I worked retail. The character bark is a quiet gasp.
When in Rome, I suppose. We take the train to Damien.
The astute reader will note that this resident looks exactly the same as the previous one. Infact, these little dudes make up the civilian population of this strange world. They're never referred to in game as anything other than "men", but in the files they are called Elsens, apparently after the first location we encounter one.
We receive a short explanation of the operation going on in this area, accompanied by some lovely shots of a vintage textbook on mining. I've always been fascinated by illustrations from the era before photographs in books became widespread. There is an entire lost field of artistry that was once devoted to informative sketches.
These creatures (and evidently The Batter) breath smoke and must produce more air for themselves by releasing it from underground.
If you say so.
The little building the miner came out of can be explored. There's also a chest that can be looted, eliciting absolutely no reaction at all from the worker standing next to it. It also has its own music track. This same track also carries over into the next location I have The Batter explore.
Nice to see a familiar face. Err, one that isn't exactly the same as all the other faces, rather. Damnit, you know what I mean.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Whatever it is, its joined our party.
Of course it wasn't going to be that easy.
Alpha is not quite as impressive as The Batter's stats, but then again one wonders what you might expect from a glowing ring of light.
With nothing left to do in this room, I have The Batter take his leave.
He has nothing else to say after that.
His buddies have a few lines though.
A few of the miners taking a break in the entryway have some warnings for us before we go on.
Control is taken from the player once you go a certain ways into this room, and The Batter walks the rest of the way himself.
Who can deny the booming words of the righteous?
Hmm, are you sure you thought this one through all the way, Batter?
You're God damn right he did.
Purification en course.
Pepper Steak is sampled from an oldschool jazz song by The Washboard Rhythm Kings which I've included here in the off chance anyone was interested.
When performing his attack, The Batter's sprite "steps" forward and a flash signifies the strike. All strikes in this game land with an extremely satisfying crack followed by a splattering sound accompanied by a spray of blood. I think the game speeds up how quickly the sounds play though, as they sound a bit different here. It certainly wouldn't be French if it weren't horrendously violent, and the fact that the enemies are all ghosts isn't going to stand in the way of that. Killed enemies fade away
Alpha's attacks are fully animated, causing the ring to shoot forward and batter whatever the unlucky target is.
Enemies aren't the only thing in this game that bleeds, as their counterattack demonstrates.
I tear into two more of these guys before I remember that I haven't used the Wide Angle yet.
I suppose it would make sense that they resist smoke given how they're haunting a smoke mine and all.
We continue chewing them off one at a time until they've all been eradicated. Battle loot is a bunch of Luck Tickets, alittle unnecessary given there's a save/restore point right next to us.
Time to start wandering the mines. I find two pieces of Silver Flesh in that chest.
Enemies in the mines are now random encounters, which begs the question of how exactly The batter expects to purify this place if the spectres here are endless.
This path is a dead end at the moment. I avoid using that ladder and head back to the mines in the mean time.
God, these guys really do remind me of when I worked retail.
A Joker is this game's resurrection item.
These annoying flying severed heads have a move called Chronic Migraine, which can inflict Blind, a status effect that basically causes all attacks to either miss or have a stupidly low chance of hitting.
Saturated Chain is basically a heavy attack, consuming mana in order to inflict more damage. I think this damage scales with Alpha's level, but I'm not completely sure. This move allows Alpha to punch quite a bit above his weight though.
Typical of RPG Maker combat, the random encounters fire off every couple of steps just about. I could run from them, but you can avoid the need to grind later on if you make sure to just fight every single encounter you come across. Discretion is for the weak and cowardly.
Exploring this seemingly dead end yields a switch that opens a secret panic room.
These Elsens are rather unhappy to see me. I steal their food and send The Batter on his way.
Two more random battles ensue. The Batter levels up again, gaining the healing move Save First Base which just about makes the Luck Ticket items superfluous.
I'm convinced this is a really complicated in-joke about how cows on large farms may swallow metal bits such as bolts, nuts, screws, shrapnel, etc that falls off farm equipment and sometimes need to be fed a magnet to clear out the pieces that get stuck in their tracts.
The Elsen giving us this information also claims that his element is the first and most important of the four elements. You may be sensing a pattern here.
I also take the time to explore the building behind him. Before you ask, there's no way to actually interact with the cows.
I didn't think this building looked very much like a barn, until I realized that entire massive structure The Batter walked by to get here apparently is the barn.
No random encounters here. instead the spectres are just patrolling around.
There large spectres create those smaller speech bubbles, referred to in the game files as Ah Ah, which cannot attack but can multiply themselves and also cast Chronic Migraine.
I suppose I wasn't quick enough on the draw to capture the way Alpha's spells work, but a crosshair forms over the target before the blow is delivered.
The speech bubbles linger after the enemy is killed. Each time one is disposed of we get an indicator saying how many are left.
The second battle goes much the same as the first.
Downstairs is a simple block-slidey puzzle to get to the spectre milling around down here.
That grey panel on the floor simply teleports The Batter back to the start of the barn, which I think is more than a little pointless to be honest.
Seemed a little excessive, don't you think?
I take the time to explore the rest of the area. Apparently those alcoves in the side of the barn are for holding the bisected cattle.
We arrive at another railway station, but like the Elsen at the barn told us, we can't ride to Alma until we find proper authorization.
Back to the mines. That dead end is now free to explore.
Oh great, just what I love. A dark room puzzle in a fucking maze.
Every time you enter into a dead end you automatically get ambushed too.
At least these ambushes are worth a fair amount of experience.
After some wandering around i come to a room with a switch in it.
Title drop.
Because I've played this game before I know that switch opens up the barrier all the way back at the very first combat location.
We encounter a new enemy type guarding the chests at the end of each of these corridors.
The special items in these chests, orbs named after the signs of the Zodiac, give a permanent bonus to a certain stat. There are six in all: Taurus (+50 Max HP), Libra (+15 Competence Points), Scorpio (+5 Attack), Gemini (+5 Defense), Capricorn (+5 Esprit) and Virgo (+5 Agility). I use most of them on Alpha since he's a little behind The Batter in all stats.
I head back down the other dark hallway until The Batter comes across a brightly lit area. The man standing around here is wearing a surgical mask. How prophetic.
The interface helpfully displays a little up arrow to give you an indicator if your equipment is better than what you currently have already. It displays an E if its equal, and a down arrow if its lower. I purchase every equippable item that's of any use, and sell off all of my extra items that I don't need.
Its not really specified, but apparently the plastic is taken from this zone and shipped elsewhere, rather than being shipped here from outside. The description is a little vague on that one.
I'm not sure if this little bureaucrat Elsen has managed to sell me on plastic being the most important of the four elements.
Hmm, must be a small building then.
Uh...
Next time: The postal service, and beyond.
This strange, highly empty location appears to be all there is to the world. A few dots of jungle green sprout from the emptiness, resembling bacterial cultures. The swamp green pattern behind them appears to just be a splotch, but I have a minor theory regarding what the shape of it might be I'll get to in a bit.
Five locations can be interacted with. Zone 0, 1, 2 and 3 are the first four.
The fifth and final location, The Room, is unlike the others, and its text is colored in strong red.
Though I'm pretty sure its not a reference, I felt the need to state this game does not predate The Room or its initial surge of popularity, though it does predate Adult Swim's first screening of it in 2009.
Attempting to enter anywhere other than Zone 0 or Zone 1 simply gives us this message.
The Batter arrives in a very green location. Its a bit hard to tell by the screenshots, but there's a mild downpour present as well.
Traveling up from our location or arrival brings us to a train station, which is apparently named Elsen. We can also speak with one of the residents, who looks a lot like me when I worked retail. The character bark is a quiet gasp.
When in Rome, I suppose. We take the train to Damien.
The astute reader will note that this resident looks exactly the same as the previous one. Infact, these little dudes make up the civilian population of this strange world. They're never referred to in game as anything other than "men", but in the files they are called Elsens, apparently after the first location we encounter one.
...
I... Uhm... Welcome to the smoke mines.
Uh... may I know who you are? Are you an inspector?
No. I'm The Batter.
Straight to the point.I've come to exterminate the impure spirits.
The... Batter... The... impure spirits?
Are you some sort of... prophet? Or perhaps a man of belief?
A savior, you might say.Yeah. Something like that.
I... Who sent you?
Nobody, I'm being led by L50.
Ah. I don't know him. He must be a member of the superior personnel...
In any case that's good. It means our requests have been acknowledged... Here, I'm going to explain your task.
We receive a short explanation of the operation going on in this area, accompanied by some lovely shots of a vintage textbook on mining. I've always been fascinated by illustrations from the era before photographs in books became widespread. There is an entire lost field of artistry that was once devoted to informative sketches.
These creatures (and evidently The Batter) breath smoke and must produce more air for themselves by releasing it from underground.
If you say so.
Finally... uh... How do I put this?
Where are the impures?
Uh... yes, there we go. There are many spectres in the mines. They are becoming more and more aggressive. But uh, in fact, it would be better if you didn't enter the mines... Because...
Because the regulations forbid visitors to access them.
So, uh, here's what we're going to do.
There's an annex tunnel that nobody ever goes to.
But a miner went in there some time ago...
And he saw something strange, he said. Nothing like the usual.
So, I thought... maybe... it's the chief of the spectres.
Uh... so, there's your task. If you accept, you'll go into the annex tunnel and kill the chief of the spectres... Then, the spectres will disappear and we can work properly again.
There we go, there we, uh... do you have any questions?
No.
Ah. Great. Impeccable. The tunnel is right down there. I'll wait here.
As with any game worth its salt, you can continue to bug characters even after they're already give you the task at hand.It's going to be great.
The little building the miner came out of can be explored. There's also a chest that can be looted, eliciting absolutely no reaction at all from the worker standing next to it. It also has its own music track. This same track also carries over into the next location I have The Batter explore.
Nice to see a familiar face. Err, one that isn't exactly the same as all the other faces, rather. Damnit, you know what I mean.
Aha, no no, certainly not. I am only passing through, not unlike the smoke which is being extracted from this pale and metallic place. However, I believe I know where the one you are taking for an ectoplasm can be found.
Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
Whatever it is, its joined our party.
Of course it wasn't going to be that easy.
Alpha is not quite as impressive as The Batter's stats, but then again one wonders what you might expect from a glowing ring of light.
With nothing left to do in this room, I have The Batter take his leave.
No.
He wasn't there.
Oh... oh? Really? I... Bugger. Crap. I... Well, then uh...
I believe that I'll have to let you enter into the main gorges, then.
But uhm... the regulations oppose it.
Alight uh... I... I suppose this is a very special case, as stated in paragraph five. There.
He has nothing else to say after that.
His buddies have a few lines though.
A few of the miners taking a break in the entryway have some warnings for us before we go on.
Control is taken from the player once you go a certain ways into this room, and The Batter walks the rest of the way himself.
Who can deny the booming words of the righteous?
Hmm, are you sure you thought this one through all the way, Batter?
You're God damn right he did.
Purification en course.
Pepper Steak is sampled from an oldschool jazz song by The Washboard Rhythm Kings which I've included here in the off chance anyone was interested.
When performing his attack, The Batter's sprite "steps" forward and a flash signifies the strike. All strikes in this game land with an extremely satisfying crack followed by a splattering sound accompanied by a spray of blood. I think the game speeds up how quickly the sounds play though, as they sound a bit different here. It certainly wouldn't be French if it weren't horrendously violent, and the fact that the enemies are all ghosts isn't going to stand in the way of that. Killed enemies fade away
Alpha's attacks are fully animated, causing the ring to shoot forward and batter whatever the unlucky target is.
Enemies aren't the only thing in this game that bleeds, as their counterattack demonstrates.
I tear into two more of these guys before I remember that I haven't used the Wide Angle yet.
I suppose it would make sense that they resist smoke given how they're haunting a smoke mine and all.
We continue chewing them off one at a time until they've all been eradicated. Battle loot is a bunch of Luck Tickets, alittle unnecessary given there's a save/restore point right next to us.
...That's practical.
The Batter just rolls with it. (I use the Save/Restore brick, I'm not going to screenshot every time I do this.Let's purify the other galleries.
Time to start wandering the mines. I find two pieces of Silver Flesh in that chest.
Enemies in the mines are now random encounters, which begs the question of how exactly The batter expects to purify this place if the spectres here are endless.
This path is a dead end at the moment. I avoid using that ladder and head back to the mines in the mean time.
God, these guys really do remind me of when I worked retail.
A Joker is this game's resurrection item.
These annoying flying severed heads have a move called Chronic Migraine, which can inflict Blind, a status effect that basically causes all attacks to either miss or have a stupidly low chance of hitting.
Saturated Chain is basically a heavy attack, consuming mana in order to inflict more damage. I think this damage scales with Alpha's level, but I'm not completely sure. This move allows Alpha to punch quite a bit above his weight though.
Typical of RPG Maker combat, the random encounters fire off every couple of steps just about. I could run from them, but you can avoid the need to grind later on if you make sure to just fight every single encounter you come across. Discretion is for the weak and cowardly.
Exploring this seemingly dead end yields a switch that opens a secret panic room.
These Elsens are rather unhappy to see me. I steal their food and send The Batter on his way.
Two more random battles ensue. The Batter levels up again, gaining the healing move Save First Base which just about makes the Luck Ticket items superfluous.
Yes.
But... But... But there are loads of spectres down there...
Yes.
Are you a spectre?
No.
Then who are you? Have you been sent by the Queen? Or by Dedan?
No.
But... But... But... You still know how to fight the spectres?
You... You could destroy them?
Yes.
Oh. That... That would be great... We... We have... spectres in our big barns.
Barns?
Ah... uh... yes...
I'm convinced this is a really complicated in-joke about how cows on large farms may swallow metal bits such as bolts, nuts, screws, shrapnel, etc that falls off farm equipment and sometimes need to be fed a magnet to clear out the pieces that get stuck in their tracts.
The Elsen giving us this information also claims that his element is the first and most important of the four elements. You may be sensing a pattern here.
Ah... Yes, but the barns aren't that big... And uh... It would be nice of you to take care of them fast, because the Queen's inspector is going to arrive at any moment... So... Could you please take care of the barns first?
...
Makes sense to me, The Batter is here to purify spirits after all.Alright.
Ah! Ah! Great! Thanks, thanks a lot! The barns are directly to the right.
They aren't that big at all; you'll see, it's going to be done quickly.
I also take the time to explore the building behind him. Before you ask, there's no way to actually interact with the cows.
I didn't think this building looked very much like a barn, until I realized that entire massive structure The Batter walked by to get here apparently is the barn.
No random encounters here. instead the spectres are just patrolling around.
There large spectres create those smaller speech bubbles, referred to in the game files as Ah Ah, which cannot attack but can multiply themselves and also cast Chronic Migraine.
I suppose I wasn't quick enough on the draw to capture the way Alpha's spells work, but a crosshair forms over the target before the blow is delivered.
The speech bubbles linger after the enemy is killed. Each time one is disposed of we get an indicator saying how many are left.
The second battle goes much the same as the first.
Downstairs is a simple block-slidey puzzle to get to the spectre milling around down here.
That grey panel on the floor simply teleports The Batter back to the start of the barn, which I think is more than a little pointless to be honest.
No... I... Yes...
Has he been in there for long?
I... I don't know...
Of course. You know nothing. I could've guessed.
He... He will eliminate... The spectres...
And why does he think he's capable of destroying those stupid phantoms?
He thinks he's better than you! Better than the Queen!
No... No, I don't think that...
Shut it. I haven't asked you anything. You all think you're smarter than everyone else.
But you're all the same.
At any case that's hardly important. The ghosts will erase that prig.
I... Ah? You... You think he won't succeed?
Of course not. Nobody here's capable of fighting the phantoms, other than the Queen's officers. If only you'd listen to me more often, you wouldn't be in so much shit.
But... But then who... Who's going to destroy the phantoms?
I could've done it. But you don't deserve it. Too bad for you, you'll just have to take care of your problems yourselves.
I... I... No... P-... Please...
I'll be leaving now. I'll be returning to Alma. At least the people there are polite. They ain't constantly cutting you off.
Pl-... Please... Don't...
Goodbye.
Get the fuck out of my way this instant, if you want to keep your job.
Seemed a little excessive, don't you think?
You... you're alive?
Yes.
And... And the spectres?
Eradicated. The barn is pure now.
That... You... You must be very lucky.
Who was that person?
That... That was Dedan. He's the Queen's supervisor.
Oddly enough, that's not a typo. Its spelled the Americanized way in that line but not any of the others.You mean specter.
... No... The Queen doesn't employ spectres. He can't be one.
But he's hostile. I must destroy him.
No... No... Don't do that. He's an envoy of the Queen.
I... I... Uh... You had better go complete your work in the smoke mines. ... P-Please...
This is getting uncomfortable....
Besides, he is in Alma. no one can get there without proper authorization. So... Please... Return to the smoke mines...
Alright.
I take the time to explore the rest of the area. Apparently those alcoves in the side of the barn are for holding the bisected cattle.
We arrive at another railway station, but like the Elsen at the barn told us, we can't ride to Alma until we find proper authorization.
Back to the mines. That dead end is now free to explore.
Oh great, just what I love. A dark room puzzle in a fucking maze.
Every time you enter into a dead end you automatically get ambushed too.
At least these ambushes are worth a fair amount of experience.
After some wandering around i come to a room with a switch in it.
Title drop.
Because I've played this game before I know that switch opens up the barrier all the way back at the very first combat location.
We encounter a new enemy type guarding the chests at the end of each of these corridors.
The special items in these chests, orbs named after the signs of the Zodiac, give a permanent bonus to a certain stat. There are six in all: Taurus (+50 Max HP), Libra (+15 Competence Points), Scorpio (+5 Attack), Gemini (+5 Defense), Capricorn (+5 Esprit) and Virgo (+5 Agility). I use most of them on Alpha since he's a little behind The Batter in all stats.
I head back down the other dark hallway until The Batter comes across a brightly lit area. The man standing around here is wearing a surgical mask. How prophetic.
Pardon?
I can feel some of you groaning at this kind of meta conversation. This was a bit less common back then. Though I suppose, not by much.What I'm saying is that the average player doesn't need all these complicated and tedious dialogues. There should be more action and fewer questions.
Who are you?
I'm Zacharie, the traditional items merchant that's necessary in every video game. I'll always find myself in place you're going to visit before you arrive.
But enough blether. I'm not one of those protagonists you need to listen to for hours.
The interface helpfully displays a little up arrow to give you an indicator if your equipment is better than what you currently have already. It displays an E if its equal, and a down arrow if its lower. I purchase every equippable item that's of any use, and sell off all of my extra items that I don't need.
From the smoke mines.
But... How... What? But... but... that's impossible ... Not a single lamp works, you... you can't have...
Faith guides my steps.
F-... Faith?
My mission is to purify the mines. But it seems that the phantoms here are particularly numerous.
The... The spectres...
Where am I?
Uh... uh...
Its not really specified, but apparently the plastic is taken from this zone and shipped elsewhere, rather than being shipped here from outside. The description is a little vague on that one.
I'm not sure if this little bureaucrat Elsen has managed to sell me on plastic being the most important of the four elements.
But... but... You hunt spectres? Really?
Yes. I'm purifying this zone.
The... The spectres, I know where they come from... They all come from the postal service.
The postal service?
That's where we send out the packaged forms. The problem is that... uh... nobody can remember which floor its found on.
Hmm, must be a small building then.
Uh...
Next time: The postal service, and beyond.
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