Off-Topic Losing people to transgenderism support thread - Support group for trans widows and other people who lost loved ones to troonism

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I witnessed a friend get groomed by discord troons. Nothing I did was able to stop it, the circle of troons pulled him in like quicksand while whispering poison in his ears. Just wear that dress guurl, just wear those striped thigh highs I know you want to, just transition and be free, just take some black market titty pills if the doc says no...

Everyone in those circles is at some stage of mental illness, usually depression or autism, and I'm convinced these people, including my friend, use troonism as an escape from their shitty reality. Like a cult.
 
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DumbDude42 said:
@Panzerfrau

so he was a redpill incel, then switched sides to troon out, and then got a girlfriend (you) ?
sounds like going down the incel-to-tranny-pipeline actually worked out for him lol, first time i hear of a case like that
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Not exactly - he was a crossdresser with an incel-y mindset all along, but he was good enough at hiding that and pretending that he's a normal (well, as normal as awkward tech bros can be) dude. It was after I caught him cumming into my panties that he decided to fuck it and reveal his true nature, a year or so into the relationship. And it never got better after that, but I was a dumb as fuck seventeen years old retard and was really scared of the "I'll kill myself if would leave me" threat, so it took me a few years to get the fuck out.
 
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Panzerfrau said:
Not exactly - he was a crossdresser with an incel-y mindset all along, but he was good enough at hiding that and pretending that he's a normal (well, as normal as awkward tech bros can be) dude. It was after I caught him cumming into my panties that he decided to fuck it and reveal his true nature, a year or so into the relationship. And it never got better after that, but I was a dumb as fuck seventeen years old retard and was really scared of the "I'll kill myself if would leave me" threat, so it took me a few years to get the fuck out.
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It sounds like you made a clean break early and there are no kids involved. You did great.
 
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Panzerfrau said:
Not exactly - he was a crossdresser with an incel-y mindset all along, but he was good enough at hiding that and pretending that he's a normal (well, as normal as awkward tech bros can be) dude. It was after I caught him cumming into my panties that he decided to fuck it and reveal his true nature, a year or so into the relationship. And it never got better after that, but I was a dumb as fuck seventeen years old retard and was really scared of the "I'll kill myself if would leave me" threat, so it took me a few years to get the fuck out.
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so he went from a closet incel, to a closet tranny, and then eventually to an open tranny (but only after you caught him red handed) ?
 
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DumbDude42 said:
so he went from a closet incel, to a closet tranny, and then eventually to an open tranny (but only after you caught him red handed) ?
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Yes. For quite some time I was the only person that knew, but eventually he told our friends, demanded to be called his new name (one of the generic go-to tranny names, think Luna or Sky). Some people humored him, most of them just started avoiding him. After the 41% attempt (which as I said, he basically live-tweeted and tried to blame on me) our friends told him to fuck off, so now his only social circle are other trannies he met on Twitter. I think he told his parents some time after I left, poor people. They don't deserve that.
 
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Oldenguard said:
I witnessed a friend get groomed by discord troons. Nothing I did was able to stop it, the circle of troons pulled him in like quicksand while whispering poison in his ears. Just wear that dress guurl, just wear those striped thigh highs I know you want to, just transition and be free, just take some black market titty pills if the doc says no...

Everyone in those circles is at some stage of mental illness, usually depression or autism, and I'm convinced these people, including my friend, use troonism as an escape from their shitty reality. Like a cult.
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This is literally what has been happening to my friend. All the troons I know are mentally ill. All of them are dysfunctional in a way. One person legitimately can't work a job because their condition is extremely impacted by their depression.

And then they're trying to goad my twink friend with a feminization fetish to troon out. I begged him to understand what he doing was going to kill him. The only reason he's not on hrt is because his state is quickly trying to ban it. So now I'm desperately hoping that the government will do their jobs and ban it. Best part is that he can't leave the state real soon due to life situations so I'm just hoping that during that period, I can somehow save him.
 
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Panzerfrau said:
once he wanted me to stuck a banana into his ass
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I didn't know the Amazing Atheist was a true and honest woman.

So you're going to run into the issue that, having gone through all that, you're a little more calloused to this sort of behavior. You may want to rip that metaphorical callus off, though, because really at the first sign of most of those behaviors, you're going to want to dump them into the proverbial garbage can. Even if trannyism is the most obvious of the red flags, score-counting, gaslighting, browbeating, emotional manipulation, and someone coked up on a cocktail of medication-while-still-doing-these-things are the sorts of things you'd look for if your ideal mate were, I don't know, a zoosadist or something.

There's lots of bullshit in the world that you can't really avoid putting up with, but you absolutely can and should avoid bullshit in relationships. There are always arguments and there's always stressful moments in them, yes, but that doesn't really cover bullshit.
 
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@Panzerfrau
You're not alone.
I had a TIM in my life who acted very similarly. I don't feel comfortable getting into it all of the details now, it hurts too much to think about, but the long and short of it is he was that he was a lanky long-haired nerd who I took pity on, because he came from a rough background and hated himself. He took advantage of my kindness and manipulated me into having sex with him, and when I would refuse, he would force me, saying he "couldn't control his actions" and that it was "just his body". He made me feel guilty and responsible for my own assault. He expressed envy of my femininity, and forced me to participate in increasingly depraved BDSM roleplays with him, made me take the role of 'mistress', which I hated. It wasn't loving at all. He ended up going on estrogen, and when I left and cut contact, he called me transphobic. He also told me I was FTM, because my lifetime of mental illness and my very butch personality matched the diagnosis for "gender dysphoria", and I believed him, even after I'd left. I was young and dumb.
 
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Panzerfrau said:
@Apis mellifera oh shit I am sorry. He should rot in hell, jesus. Good thing you are out, it will get better, it gets better after some time. He will fail at life just like every other troon and will be miserable pile of shit forever, while you will heal and thrive, you will see!
If you would ever need this, you can DM me anytime!
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:heart-full:
Thank you for your kind words, same goes to you. I know it will get better, it has to, we have no other option other than to get better. We can't be sad and injured forever. I'm still working through it in therapy years later, but it gets easier. I struggled with alcohol and substance abuse, after I left him, for years, because it was too painful to face, it's a struggle to not relapse in therapy. I'm not quite as sharp as I used to be, mentally, which I regret. I worry for young women out there, who have empathetic hearts and a desire to help others, who are LGB themselves or sympathetic to them, it's worryingly common to fall for the "pitiable transsexual" narrative. I can only hope people like our exes don't hurt any more women, but the anxiety persists.
 
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Kosher Dill said:
Any advice on vetting public schools? I have a chance to nudge an at-risk family in one direction or another since they're moving.
Unfortunately "tell them not to send their kids to public schools" isn't an option. I've tried.
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I can't say how one would vet a public school unless one goes there oneself. Liking looking over the contents of the library for pro-lgbt books.

Obviously a smaller more conservative community will be less at risk than say a large liberal community. However one cannot be certain. I'd say any private institution that isn't a Christian one or religious in some fashion is also a risk.
 
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Kosher Dill said:
Any advice on vetting public schools? I have a chance to nudge an at-risk family in one direction or another since they're moving.
Unfortunately "tell them not to send their kids to public schools" isn't an option. I've tried.
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Private schools still encourage troons.

As horrible as this sounds, unless the kid can be bullied by people higher on the socjus totem pole to not be a tranny, who won't be reprimanded, then they'll be indulged by just about any school.
 
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Kosher Dill said:
Any advice on vetting public schools? I have a chance to nudge an at-risk family in one direction or another since they're moving.
Unfortunately "tell them not to send their kids to public schools" isn't an option. I've tried.
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There's no replacement for just going and poking around, asking uncomfortable questions of the administrators. You could try searching "name of school" and "transgender" on google to see if any lott or news stories come up. Other than that...
 
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Kosher Dill said:
Any advice on vetting public schools? I have a chance to nudge an at-risk family in one direction or another since they're moving.
Unfortunately "tell them not to send their kids to public schools" isn't an option. I've tried.
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Just encourage them to actually read their kids’ assignments/materials and sign up for the school’s email communications. Hopefully it will all be a big nothingburger in their case.

It sounds to me like any confessional school that isn’t mainstream Catholic will discourage troonism. Any small Catholic school in an area with a lot of tradcaths is reliable from what I’ve heard.
 
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Religious schools are good, but as Heather Cho said, ain't no escape.


The child will make friends and have to make their own judgements and own choices. You can't completely vet a kid's friends, ban the kid from seeing their rebellious trans friend and they'll be attracted to rebellion. The best you can do is keep someone educated about it, and hopefully school choice will help even if it isn't perfect.
 
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