Off-Topic Losing people to transgenderism support thread - Support group for trans widows and other people who lost loved ones to troonism

[Enoby Way]

Thought I was enby for a bit, turned out I was just an autistic woman. My best friend is also autistic and has started to talk about being non-binary but she is still attending the women's circle I run so it can't be that triggering for her....hopefully it is just a phase. She's very socially progressive, mostly out of a genuine desire for people to be happy. Not in her nature to be a very angry person.

She knows I am happy about the UK banning kids from transitioning, while she calls the UK terf island--but she didn't slap me in the face and scream that I was a TERF when I let the cat out of the bag about that one. I just asked if we could not talk about it and she said sure, that was okay, hopefully I would change my mind through exposure to it as we conversed over time.

Not great as it's still a conversion speech, but far from the worst thing ever.

I'm still trying to figure out how to talk to her about this shit in more detail, or if I even should. I'm so scared. I love her to bits, I can't stand the thought of her drinking this kool aid any longer.

I've made up my mind while writing this, if she tries to hold a mini intervention for me to try and change my mind, that's when I'll have a list of links ready to go, and I'll tell her if she reads mine, I'll read hers.

And then I'll link her to Kevin Gibes' thread. It's all I've got.

Didn't realise how emotional I'd get writing this. I just want her to be happy and safe from this cult mindset, I love and care about her so so much, and I don't even care how faggy it is to say that, cause I do.

 

[Bad Gateway]

Cults are, at their core, all the same. The transgender ideology is no more than a cult. And here's the thing about cults: They're going to get the people who want to be got by them. It's a two-way street, exclusively. As an adult, you cannot be groomed unless you are willing to submit to the grooming. Children are a different issue.

If you understand and believe that transgenderism is a cult, then the victimology of people who allow themselves to join becomes very clear, direct, and understandable. Just like with people who join any other cult, there is a time to cut and run. If they don't hear you now, all you can do is hope they hear you later. It is fine to cut a cult member out of your everyday life, no matter who they are to you. In most situations, it is not only fine, but an objectively good idea to leave move on from someone if they are determined to become trans. They are beyond any help you could offer. Worse than that, they will reject your help to your face, and crucify you for trying to help them, sometimes behind your back, but also sometimes in front of you, to other people.

So, kindly, as gently as is possible, it is always the best plan to remove these people from your life. A partner, a child, a parent, a friend - anyone. Let them know that you are there for them, that they can get in touch with you at any time, that you will always answer the phone for them, but that they will not impress their ideology upon you, and that they will not be allowed to continue to impact your life negatively. At a certain point fairly early on, damage control comes into the equation, and it rapidly becomes more important to save what parts of your life and plans you can, rather than let the whole construction of a life fail as a result of one weakened and collapsing chain link. And then you let go. As hard as it is, as painful as it is, you let go. And you let them see you let them go. You explain it. You narrate the event clearly and directly. No anger. No fear. Look them in the eye. Show them that you are stronger, no matter what they tell you. Show them that you know they are weaker, no matter how they pretend. Make them remember that moment, better yet, make it impossible for them to forget that moment.

In the long run, one of two things will happen: 1) Somehow, someway, they will realize the error of the path they've chosen, and they will return to a normal life as best they can. This can even occur on a deathbed. Or, 2) They will die in the oppressive confines of the cult, the life they chose for themselves. This is the hard part for survivors, for the people who are abandoned by cult members: Regardless of the outcome, whether it's number one or number two, there was nothing you could have done to impact the ending. There was nothing anyone could do. This was their choice, and nobody else could have made it for them.

 

[AMHOLIO]

She's very socially progressive, mostly out of a genuine desire for people to be happy. Not in her nature to be a very angry person.

Honestly, in spite of a lot of the Autistic Thunderdome's (tm) views on social progressives, I find more people like this than what would be described as libtards. Its a shame the hard left uses soft people like this. I guess it's who you hang out with: blue leaning people like me or people with liberal leaning groups like yours (women support shouldn't be political but it is what it is) are more likely to find honest nicer people.

And then I'll link her to Kevin Gibes' thread. It's all I've got.

Full metal weaponized autism.

I hope it goes well - I'm glad you love your friend so much you're willing to try to talk her into at least understanding your point of view and why she shouldn't drift further into madness. You got this@

 

[Koby_Fish]

I knew a person casually (wasn't close to them) who I saw periodically for about a decade or so. Then they left town, trooned out (from female to taking T to become "non-binary" and now has a beard), changed name, and ended up on the news over the kid they had with sperm bank sperm (my god they just hand out sperm to anyone these days, don't they) having an "X" for their biological sex despite said child NOT being intersex, because they wanted said kid to figure out their own gender as they grew up. They're so committed to the "non-binary" bit that they refused to acknowledge their "identified-at-birth" biological sex, despite having birthed a child.

I haven't seen the person IRL since before they transitioned (they were quite tomboyish and regularly wore army surplus clothing for some reason as did their sister who butched out and is now lesbun and was even in a relationship with a lesbun that was abusive), but from mutual friends I've heard they've gone full IngSoc Justice Warrior.

 

[Jimjamflimflam]

Its a shame the hard left uses soft people like this.

Goto pol and ask how many used to identify as leftist. The number could surprise you. So many times when ive polled people about it the answer seems to be "I was left because I wanted to help others. Their toxicity pushed me away and i realized i need to help myself first" or something to that effect. The best recruiters for the right is the left.

 

[Synthetic Smug]

Goto pol and ask how many used to identify as leftist. The number could surprise you. So many times when ive polled people about it the answer seems to be "I was left because I wanted to help others. Their toxicity pushed me away and i realized i need to help myself first" or something to that effect. The best recruiters for the right is the left.

I was a free speech leftist when I was young. but things changed in the 90's as the left came out in charge little by little.

I'm still for free speech, but fuck me if the sides didn't change on my ass.

 

[Unassuming Local Guy]

I'd answer the poll if it wasn't public. That information is specific enough that I'd consider it a PL unless you live in a blue stronghold. Believe it or not, trannies are exceedingly rare outside of a handful of especially pozzed cities.

So instead I'll just say that I know of more than one troon IRL - none more than as friends of friends - and the least crazy one still destroyed his marriage of over a decade in his quest to become the big tiddy goth gf.

The rest are so crazy I wouldn't feel safe if they knew my home address. They were also all unhinged degenerates long before trooning out became fashionable and not one of them ever expressed anything approaching gender dysphoria until Twitter told them to cut off their dicks. But I'm sure that's a total coincidence and they were just hiding it really really well.

 

[Megaroad 2012]

Can't say I lost anyone I knew and loved but I've watched this grandpa in a wig slowly lose his mind at work over the past year. I'm gonna stick with male pronouns to make this easier to type out. Let's call him Hal like the computer.

I usually don't like being mean with name calling a trans person something like "grandpa in a wig", but this particular person is a complete 180 from when I first met him a year ago and honestly after having to deal with their problems via proxy the last few days I'm done being nice.

When Hal first got hired, he was already in this new female persona he had created only a few years ago despite being in his 50's, but seemed find and docile. Maybe on chemicals but definitely has his junk still. Somehow got the #2 lead in one of our departments.

Slowly though, around last october/november when all these long trips to the doctors began, this malicious persona has slowly began seeping out of Hal. From lies, annoying little subtle comments, leaving work for everyone to do and creating fictional stories or excuses about why everything is fucked up, if not out right disappearing on the job.

Thing is, lately the department has been sticking up for themselves and Hal's reaction is... something else. The dudes way of arguing was like watching a kid argue. Swinging arms, stomping his foot screeching "nooOOOOOOO" a lot.

One day, an argument had occured. I guess as soon as the main lead left the department, Hal immediately wen't apeshit on an employee for not doing it Hal's way (despite Hal's way greatly reducing productivity). The employee threw everything back at Hal's face by calling the useless piece of shit who wastes time. Cue temper tantrum.

I was already in the parking garage smoking with my coworker in her car when the argument happened. What we didn't know was the in the spot in front of her vehichle was Hal's car, our windshields facing. Hal comes storming down, doesn't notice us as he's kicking his tires in anger. Get's inside his car, throws all his shit around and then begans to bash his head on the stearing wheel repeatedly. Like, it was a horror movie. Since this, I legit worry Hal will go postal.

And this isn't the only time, because a week or two later someone spotting Hal doing that hard again, bashin his head against a wall thinking no one could see him. No love tap or frustration bump against the wall, legit intent to cause harm hitting.

A part of me sometimes has a shred of pity for him, especially seeing the self harm.

Hearing his past, he mentioned being in desert storm, being a cop, owning a security company. All very masculine things, like he was trying to prove his toughness. Doesn't help all of Hal's sisters I guess died of drug overdoses and he has nothing left. Unfortunately while I feel bad for the person that got fucked up by whatever to make them turn this way, I can't feel bad for the asshole they've become. And it's just so weird, Hal was nothing like this a year ago unless he was damn good at hiding it. It's just that we noticed this back when Hal began going to the doctor more last November.

Damndest thing is, withen a few weeks of being hired he met another troon who was already working here for a few years. A real fucking crybaby, this time a FtM, who is like 20 to 30 years Hal's junior and is into self harming with cutting (and going as far as to blame a coworker who doesn't take their shit as the reason to cut). Watching this relationship is like watching a father interact with his daughter and just disturbs me to no end.

 

[Grundlejungle]

I have known several:
2 were standard overweight, weeb autists that eventually decided that "I am wamon nao", neither pass at all, and both of them became insufferable. Noone really cared, because both of them are unemployable, malodorous, genetic dead-ends in the first place.
An ex of mine also became a FTM. She went down the SoJus pipeline of bi>pan(This is where I got off her crazy train)>they/them>tranny. Its a real shame too (even though she was totally fucking crazy), she went from hot, top of her class, athletic and majoring in medicine, to looking like any given fatfuck neckbeard total loser who is in massive debt for an art degree.
The only trans person that I know that is fucking normal is my friend that actually went to therapy for several years before doing anything. She (formerly he)is a badass motherfucker that works hard, acts normal, and rips on tumblr faggots harder than anyone else I know.

 

[AMHOLIO]

Since this, I legit worry Hal will go postal.

If you die let us know. Archive it too.


Seriously though, that's some wild shit. I wonder if he's having an adverse affect to his medication or if he's got the early stages of a mental degenerating disease. I hope he leaves work peacefully or without too much trouble if he's fired/quits.

Noone really cared, because both of them are unemployable, malodorous, genetic dead-ends in the first place.

Honestly makes me wonder how many weebs trooned out but no one gave a shit because they're fat smelly and weebs in the first place.

She (formerly he)is a badass motherfucker that works hard, acts normal, and rips on tumblr faggots harder

I am a big fan of her already and I'm glad she's a chad of a woman.
Wish more chill trans people existed instead of troons, really glad she went through therapy to sort herself out first then her gender. I wish more people went down that route, but getting titty skittles NOW NOW NOW is easier and gets you into the kool kidz klub (and are just as tolerant of a klub as the kkk). If transitioning had more gatekeeping we wouldn't have half the problems we have now and it irks me every day.

 

[Fentanyl Floyd]

Goto pol and ask how many used to identify as leftist. The number could surprise you. So many times when ive polled people about it the answer seems to be "I was left because I wanted to help others. Their toxicity pushed me away and i realized i need to help myself first" or something to that effect. The best recruiters for the right is the left.

That's kind of what happened to me. I was a bernie-tier shitlib, and then when I started to get off drugs the Ferguson chimpouts happened, the hypocrisy and excuse making I saw from leftists opened my eyes

 

[Clown College]

I have a niece that came out as trans a couple of years ago. Thankfully her mother (my sister) agreed with M's therapist to not even consider hormone replacement until the age of 18 (also kudos to the therapist for being smart about that). The other aspect of this is that M was also diagnosed on the autism spectrum I'm not sure how severe the case is but she's most definitely autistic. I get sad when I hear of other transgenders targeting autistic kids trying to convince them that they're trans when they're very likely not.

M also has a cousin who first came out as lesbian a few years back then came out as trans and actually took the hormones. I was surprised when I saw her a couple of years later and she changed her name to Charlie I had to ask my sister who she was. Anyways this kind of hard for me 'cause I really want people to led happy lives but after M's parents got divorced which screwed the kids up pretty badly I just don't see it. Even my sister seems a lot less happy these days and I have to wonder if she really deep down inside accepts that her daughter is trans and actually wants her to transition should M choose to do so. I just wonder who is whispering in these kids' ears that this is a viable solution to be accepted and to be happy because I'm not so sure that it is.

 

[AMHOLIO]

I just wonder who is whispering in these kids' ears that this is a viable solution to be accepted and to be happy because I'm not so sure that it is.

I hate to say it but sometimes, its no one at all. She might have just read too many happy postings online or a good friend has changed or she just saw it and became set on it because autism is like that with its logic and desires. On one hand it means no one is taking advantage of her, on the other it still means people around her have to work a bit to get her out of it, if they can and she isn't stubborn. Knowing her logic behind the whole process helps, speaking to her while hanging out and getting into a q&a witth her about gender (she might love to talk, she might not) and seeing how she's doing and how her brain's working to that conclusion helps if you two have a good enough relationship (really its the same for nonautistic people). It doesn't always work as she could just be completely obsessed with gender as a special interest, but getting closer to her is never a bad thing. Good on your sister by the way, I hope she can find happiness again. Divorce is always hard. Good luck to the three of you.

Oh, by the way, thanks everyone so far for sharing, giving advice, and discussing these things. Its put me at ease for my friend: I feel like I can let her go and be at peace with it, or at least not worry about it as much unless she needs my help and reaches out to me again. This and the other threads got me prepared, and if not, I'm still at piece. Thanks lads

 

[Postal_Rat]

I was already in the parking garage smoking with my coworker in her car when the argument happened. What we didn't know was the in the spot in front of her vehichle was Hal's car, our windshields facing. Hal comes storming down, doesn't notice us as he's kicking his tires in anger. Get's inside his car, throws all his shit around and then begans to bash his head on the stearing wheel repeatedly. Like, it was a horror movie. Since this, I legit worry Hal will go postal.

Assuming it's legal to do in your state you might want to try to record that sort of thing if you get the chance, that seems like the sort of instability that gets HR looking for an exit strategy.
Edit: and you can neatly pass that off as concern for him Idk though I can think of a few reasons why that might not be practical or a good idea

 

[Eto]

I saw this thread and decided to hop off my hiatus temporarily to share my stories. Three involves my ex friends and one involves me. From what I've gathered, these people tend to be awkward as fuck, some sort of mental issue like depression or anxiety, and tend to have niche interests, like anime.

Spoiler: Stories

Let's start with D. D was always this really awkward, yet chill and funny girl. Never met anyone like her, and I felt like we connected. She originally came out as bisexual, years pass and she decides she's non-binary. Okay, whatever. Stupid, but whatever. One day I visited her Tumblr blog and she was insisting people call her by her birthname or Dio, after Dio Brando. I ended up cutting contact with her, because I felt that the friendship was one-sided, and she was starting to get on the woke train. She never bothered to contact me on anything to ask what the hell was my problem.

This next one is an absolute train wreck. Her mother died back in 2009, she was overweight, awkward as fuck, too trusting of people online, supposedly has an abusive dad, among other shit. She was mentally unstable as fuck, and I will admit that I didn't help, as I was a dick back then. Fast forward a few years later, and she's on the bigender or non-binary shit, too. She even had on profiles that she went as a "system," and that she had multiple personalities. I eventually confronted her about it, and said, "Well that's retarded." Left her completely puzzled, and after that I cut contact.

This third one is a guy, and yet again was awkward as fuck and overweight. He was a bit of a pervert, and a huge baseball fan. He had depression and whatnot, and I'd suggest something to try and help out, but he'd completly disregard it. He'd always talk about how he wanted to be a girl, and that he'd make a beautiful girl. I tried suggesting he talk to his therapist, but he refused to do even that. With the friends we hung out with, I wouldn't be surprised if he trooned out already. The two mutuals were woke Tumblr trash, and I cut contact with them the same day I did with the first one. I lost contact with the guy about 3 years ago.

Now this last one is embarrassing as fuck, because it involves me. Back when I talked to the first three cases, I got into that Tumblr trash as a result of them being on Tumblr. I guess it rubbed off on me, because I eventually concluded that I was genderqueer. I was still in denial about my bisexuality, and had feelings of shame and doubt. After I ditched those friends, I dropped the genderqueer shit and kept being a guy until I got a bit sucked back into the shit a few years back, this time wanting to be a girl. My current boyfriend (before we started dating) reached out to me and asked me to not troon out, and I had someone say that I'd make an ugly woman. That snapped me back to reality, and I've been fine since. I've pretty much accepted my bisexuality, and somewhat accept that I can be pretty feminine.

 

[AMHOLIO]

That snapped me back to reality, and I've been fine since. I've pretty much accepted my bisexuality, and somewhat accept that I can be pretty feminine.

Good end. Glad you came to your senses, hope you stay confident in yourself homie. And good boyfriend!

 

[deadeggbeard]

Someone in my extended social circle came out as trans not long after they were accused by several women of being a rapist.

 

[glass_houses]

Female autist who can't socialise with other female autists here. The entire network is swimming in social justice and dripping with trans worship. A support group I'm a member of absolutely will not allow anything except fervent and passionate avowals of turd sucking the instant someone raises a subject remotely related to trans issues. A 'transwoman' joined the group and it was clear from the first slimy post he made that he was a sexual predator there to groom young women, and I couldn't say a damn thing about it because I would have been kicked instantly from the group. I basically just blocked his posts and just hoped that no one really young lived near enough for him to get at them physically. One woman in the group assured me that she was, "a boy" despite being an adult woman who dresses conservatively in skirts and makeup everyday, with children and a husband, and was completely unable to explain to me just what the fuck that meant. I was told repeatedly by a number of these women that they were "proud to be women and also transgendered" and they couldn't tell me that the fuck that meant either, I was just supposed to go "Oooooh, inspiring!" and clap.

I'm a sped who wants to talk to other speds, and it's fucking impossible because they're all SJW trannies who've spent so long marinating on Twitter and Tumblr that they've convinced themselves that they live on the other side of the world in 'murica. Ask them what's going on in their own fucking country and they look at you like you've grown a second head. These people actually found a "calculate your privilege" website one day and they genuinely thought it was a legit ground breaking idea, and not fucking satire!

 

[Zero Day Defense]

Not really "losses", but, erm...

My first girlfriend was a lesbian who explored intimacy with men via me in high school (the relationship lasted a couple days because it itself was malformed and I didn't know how to manage the prospect of something I figured I'd only be doing at 21+), we had another encounter but testing season, my desire to not waste my old man's money by failing them, and the fact that she was literally-- not figuratively, literally-- a depressed weeb killed any sexual and romantic intrigue), then decided to either become FtM or dangerously close according to what I heard from the grapevine. She also screwed up her hair something fierce the last few times I saw her around-- it was a damn tragedy.

I had an underclassman friend whose grades were meh but did really good with tests and intellectual sport. He was eccentric to begin with (as was I, but he way more so), but he confided in me that he was experimenting with anal insertion and tried to catfish me with a picture of his legs in thigh-highs (I honestly can't remember if I was fooled at first-- I feel like I wasn't just because of the poor setup). By the time he got to college, I hear he became MtF.

 

[Koby_Fish]

Female autist who can't socialise with other female autists here. The entire network is swimming in social justice and dripping with trans worship. A support group I'm a member of absolutely will not allow anything except fervent and passionate avowals of turd sucking the instant someone raises a subject remotely related to trans issues. A 'transwoman' joined the group and it was clear from the first slimy post he made that he was a sexual predator there to groom young women, and I couldn't say a damn thing about it because I would have been kicked instantly from the group. I basically just blocked his posts and just hoped that no one really young lived near enough for him to get at them physically. One woman in the group assured me that she was, "a boy" despite being an adult woman who dresses conservatively in skirts and makeup everyday, with children and a husband, and was completely unable to explain to me just what the fuck that meant. I was told repeatedly by a number of these women that they were "proud to be women and also transgendered" and they couldn't tell me that the fuck that meant either, I was just supposed to go "Oooooh, inspiring!" and clap.

I'm a sped who wants to talk to other speds, and it's fucking impossible because they're all SJW trannies who've spent so long marinating on Twitter and Tumblr that they've convinced themselves that they live on the other side of the world in 'murica. Ask them what's going on in their own fucking country and they look at you like you've grown a second head. These people actually found a "calculate your privilege" website one day and they genuinely thought it was a legit ground breaking idea, and not fucking satire!

I'm going to go out on a limb here (autist also) and postulate that these people that think they're the opposite gender believe it to be so because they have interests that mesh more with what a large percentage of the opposite sex has for hobbies, ideas, etc, and not so much in their own biological sex.

Spoiler: Powerlevel

When I was a kid I autistically thought I think like the opposite sex, because due to what I was interested in I thought I didn't think like the same sex. Because, "What's the only other alternative?" Yeah that logic was autistic AF but to be fair, I wouldn't even find out I was an autist for another good 15-20 years.