Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

Yup, he’s spiraling. I can’t wait for the blowup.
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Beautiful.

I was wrong, I was so so wrong to think that mere psychopharmacology had the means to dull the razor edge of Wern's entitled insanity.

Mea culpa, you crazy bastard.

(Also, is it really just now occurring to him for the very first time that having gained all that weight is going to be a major impediment to finding a young beautiful woman? Like, I guess as he was putting on those pounds he just thought, "I'm great the way I am so a few extra pounds don't matter"? I wonder what it was that cemented in his head recently the reality that people were turning him down based upon his size? Frankly, even though he's a disgusting giant potato, his morbid obesity is probably still the least of his problems as a hypothetical romantic partner.)

 

[Krathnami]

The only way Lucas can have a friend

 

[ManfromtheMoon]

I feel like he’s always done that though, he’s always imagining people having orgies and group sex and getting all pissed off that he’s not invited.

Someone mentioned maladaptive daydreaming before and I think that’s definitely the case here.

This just supports Lucas is into cuckoldry. Maladaptive daydreaming usually comes out when you want to escape reality and fantasize certain scenarios

 

[BowlOfDick]

Lucas becoming self aware of his weight will also drive him to further purposeful non-compliance of his meds, as he will blame them for his weight and thus his no-gf status.

It is only a matter of time before someone sees his vulnerability and attempts to catfish him, leading to further agitation, paranoia and anger.

 

[Da Dude123]

Lucas becoming self aware of his weight will also drive him to further purposeful non-compliance of his meds, as he will blame them for his weight and thus his no-gf status.

It is only a matter of time before someone sees his vulnerability and attempts to catfish him, leading to further agitation, paranoia and anger.

And the cow will fall for the catfish, he always does. This is because of a few reasons. Lolcows never learn their lessons, ever. The others are Lucas really does believe he is plenty good. He thinks that all the hot Gen Z women should be interested in him, since he has so much going for himself. Why wouldn't they? Unless those awful flatbill baseball cap wearers or greybeards swoop in.

Like I said, plenty good! No reason a Gen Z woman wouldn't want to have him moooove in with her without her ever meeting him or speaking to him on the phone. That LA situation, Lucas would totally fall for that again. He learned nothing from that experience and someone bailed him out. Someone suggested his mom may have broke down and bailed him out, I think that may be right. But he is dumb and autistic enough to fall for that again.

 

[SteveGoatman]

Lucas becoming self aware of his weight will also drive him to further purposeful non-compliance of his meds, as he will blame them for his weight and thus his no-gf status.

It is only a matter of time before someone sees his vulnerability and attempts to catfish him, leading to further agitation, paranoia and anger.

Maybe he'll enter another "looking into bodybuilding" ....or "looking into going vegan" phase. I'm just sad that it seems like the school arc may be finished (though he's surprised us all before at his ability to get others to pay for yet another go at it).

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

Yup, he’s spiraling. I can’t wait for the blowup.
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Anyone who has a value that Lucas wants and can't get is "worshipping" it. "Worshipping" money. Millennials "worship themselves". Good looking young couples are "self-worshipping".

So what altar do you pray at, Lucas? Laziness & Gluttony?

And look at that middle quote: "I want a woman who's idea of pleasure is abject sloth, like mine. I am in fact SUCH a sloth that I can't even be bothered to try and achieve said hypothetical, non-existent dream relationship. Just wanted you to know!"

 

[BowlOfDick]

Anyone who has a value that Lucas wants and can't get is "worshipping" it. "Worshipping" money. Millennials "worship themselves". Good looking young couples are "self-worshipping".

So what altar do you pray at, Lucas? Sloth & Gluttony?

Lucas’s use of religious wordage and themes is both ironic in light of his atheism and a clear indicator of his schizoid pathology.

 

[MeganDodgedABullet]

This has been a good day for lolcow milk from Lucas. He has been on a roll today. He is back on his plenty good and should have a pretty woman phase. He is too good for a fat woman, those women should accept him as he is and quit being so shallow, damn it! Reeee!
Also, notice that in the meme, the fat guy resembles Lucas, if he wore a fedora. I wish he would start wearing one. That would be fantastic!


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I wish we knew about his phase as the "aberdeen atheist"? or was it Spokane? when he was an insufferable twatty atheist neckbeard. Was that the same time ( as per Cyril?) that Lucas called himself "the wizard" and wore a stupid wizards hat from time to time?
Damn, I'd love to see some receipts on that deep lore.....

 

[BowlOfDick]

I wish we knew about his phase as the "aberdeen atheist"? or was it Spokane? when he was an insufferable twatty atheist neckbeard. Was that the same time ( as per Cyril?) that Lucas called himself "the wizard" and wore a stupid wizards hat from time to time?
Damn, I'd love to see some receipts on that deep lore.....

Short answer: yes.

Long answer: I first became aware of Lucas through a Facebook group called Godless Mingle in early 2016. He was attempting to brand himself as some kind of internet celebrity, modelling him on his heroes like James McCaffee (sp?).

He went through various attempts to brand himself, including The Broke Atheist and The Wizard and the like. Ultimately this peaked with his shitty Tshirt design.

It slowly became apparent to women in the group that he was a total creep and he was ejected shortly before the Starbucks event on December/January.

Sadly wernography wasn’t an established field of study at the time, and thusly any record of this time is lost to the ages.

 

[37yearolddickrightnow]

I think "the Broke Atheist" phase was when he still lived in Olympia. It would have been a decade or more since he lived with Cyril. If I recall, his thing then was leaving creepy, schizo attraction signs with boxes of junk food and soda around for the babes to discover.

 

[BowlOfDick]

I think "the Broke Atheist" phase was when he still lived in Olympia. It would have been a decade or more since he lived with Cyril. If I recall, his thing then was leaving creepy, schizo attraction signs with boxes of junk food and soda around for the babes to discover.

The Olympia-Spokane Migration is a gap in my Wern History in terms of the actual sequence of events.

Sadly I believe little primary sources remain, and we rely purely on the word of mouth folklore surrounding those events.

 

[37yearolddickrightnow]

The Olympia-Spokane Migration is a gap in my Wern History in terms of the actual sequence of events.

Sadly I believe little primary sources remain, and we rely purely on the word of mouth folklore surrounding those events.

In his impromptu AMA, Cyril believed Lucas moved to Spokane to have better access to welfare and mental health services. There was also some speculation that he "wore out his welcome" in Olympia, and basically got out of Dodge. He may of been catfished as well. I think elements of all the above are plausible

 

[TurdFondler]

Before he deleted everything there were 2 videos where he went into a lot backstory. One of them was "while you were out getting everything I deserve" and the other was him in his original fartbox under a stained ceiling, pretty sure there was a ceiling fan. Don't remember the title.

He goes on about how he left Olympians after wearing out his welcome and not being invited to orgies that he imagined were happening. I think these videos were just after the Cyril era, the second one was just after him and Susanne broke up, iirc.

What I wouldn't give for a picture of him as The Wizard.

 

[Da Dude123]

What lies is capitalism telling, Lucas? Huh? Tell us, you cow!

 

[WonderWino]

In his impromptu AMA, Cyril believed Lucas moved to Spokane to have better access to welfare and mental health services. There was also some speculation that he "wore out his welcome" in Olympia, and basically got out of Dodge. He may of been catfished as well. I think elements of all the above are plausible

Uh....What? There is no may about it. By all accounts he was catfished to olympia, that was pretty well documented

 

[mothman96]

Uh....What? There is no may about it. By all accounts he was catfished to olympia, that was pretty well documented

Catfished to Olympia? I'm aware he was catfished to Spokane but in his late teens/early 20's(?) he lived with Cyril in Olympia then later lived in some type of Sped housing from which he was kicked out. I think it was in 2011 when he moved in Suzanne (Olympia) and he was about 31 at the time. After Suzanne booted him he stayed in Olympia until he was catfished to Spokane in 2016.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

Moooing on a Monday! The fat cow is moooing about how hot girls won't date his fat, broke, cow ass. You should date a fatty, Lucas! Also, she should be Gen X. Lol@brother in Christ.View attachment 3503912View attachment 3503914View attachment 3503916

THE COW IS MOOING AGAIN!

Let the milk flow!

 

[Vi0l3t]

Moooing on a Monday! The fat cow is moooing about how hot girls won't date his fat, broke, cow ass. You should date a fatty, Lucas! Also, she should be Gen X. Lol@brother in Christ.View attachment 3503912View attachment 3503914View attachment 3503916

Wern was my first lolcow. Glad to see he is unchanged. Talks about shallow but when describing the woman he wants it's never anything deep. Just "young and beautiful".

 

[Da Dude123]

Lucas doesn't need to work. He gets re-tard bux and subsidized housing. He's plenty good there. But the queefy baes won't give him pussy without a job.