Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

The cow is out of the hospital. No dialysis was done. Earlier he said they were totally doing dialysis or did dialysis. I don't know what to believe now.

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Just release today from the hospital. A couple of days ago he made it sound like he was out already.

ETA:
Sure, until the gluttony takes over then it's Atilanos, Twigs, etc. and all the "home cooked" pasta and quesadillas.

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Iirc he was talking about one of his brothers? I could be wrong though, but I think I remember something about one of his brothers kicking him out or not letting him stay with them after he acted creepy towards the niece
Possibly, I feel like it sounds like it’s directed at his brothers, but I don’t recall ever hearing about him staying/living with them, and the step sisters are the ones with kids (his nieces and nephew), so I don’t think it would have been related to that, unless it was a kind of “you creeped on our niece and that’s too far so get out of my life” way, which like I said definitely could have happened.
 

Every other time he’s been in any er or hospital situation he’s proven it without it being asked if him.

My guess is he was back at Mallon place. He’d have taken pics of himself in a hospital bed like he did before. And asked for a call. He likely got returned to intensive nursing home care.
 
The cow is out of the hospital. No dialysis was done. Earlier he said they were totally doing dialysis or did dialysis. I don't know what to believe now.

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They didn't keep him sitting around in the hospital for no reason and this dialysis stuff wasn't him trying to be clever. He isn't that smart. He doesn't know enough about kidney related shit to even come up with something like that if he wanted to. Plus he wouldn't have even if he was smart enough because it would make him look bad. He must have had at least one session done and this is his way of trying to trick people into believing he's still plenty good and theres totally nothing wrong with him. He's covering what really happened with lies as he always does when something reflects badly on him

Which is only reinforced by him saying this:

mothman96 said:
Just release today from the hospital. A couple of days ago he made it sound like he was out already.

ETA:
Sure, until the gluttony takes over then it's Atilanos, Twigs, etc. and all the "home cooked" pasta and quesadillas.
In other words lucas was told he needs to change his diet, get away from carbs, fats, large amounts of protein and sugar and start eating alot more vegetables or his kidneys are going eventually fail and kill him. As usual he takes what he was told by doctors, twists it around in his head and tries to make it sound like it was his own idea to do so and to get healthier to hide the fact its doctors orders and he's in terrible shape

Clown Balls said:
He faked the kidney crisis?!?
No. Lucas is far too stupid to come up with renal problems, biopsies and dialysis and his shit health and inability to eat chips, drink a beer or smoke a joint without puking his guts out aren't only very well known they're literally on video. The symptoms are real, he was in the hospital and was there for alot longer than he would have been if it was something minor. No way he didn't have at least one session of dialysis done. There was no other reason to keep him that long or for them to be doing or saying that stuff to him

WhiskerBiscuit said:
Every other time he’s been in any er or hospital situation he’s proven it without it being asked if him.

My guess is he was back at Mallon place. He’d have taken pics of himself in a hospital bed like he did before. And asked for a call. He likely got returned to intensive nursing home care.

The problems with this theory are a) the shit health is real, the puking after doing things that shouldn't be causing puking are real and on video multiple times, he has no reason to make shit up about puking in an uber and is too stupid to come up with the things he said were happening himself b) even if they wanted him back in the nursing home part of mallon its likely they filled his place as soon as he was out, its not like they can just squeeze him into an already occupied room. He'd have had to be put somewhere else that had space and c) he's been in the hospital for days and is already trying to retcon and manipulate people into believing an obvious bs story that he's totally healthy and changing his diet of his own accord. He can't keep what he's saying now consistent or say it in a manner that makes sense. So he is trying to cover up what happened at the hospital

Just because he took pictures in the hospital other times doesn't mean he would this time. If anything he'd make a point of not taking pictures that he knows would come back to haunt him later when he tried to claim he was plenty good and healthy. No way he'd post pictures of being hooked up to dialysis, post biopsy or looking sick as fuck. Too much of his story about what happened and how and recent incidents fit with kidney problems
 
The cow is out of the hospital. No dialysis was done. Earlier he said they were totally doing dialysis or did dialysis. I don't know what to believe now.

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Maybe he jumped the gun? They told him he may need it, took the biopsy and he doesnt. A lot of attention whores exaggerate medical shit. I have a relative who made me think another relative was basically dying and it wasnt even a big fucking deal.
 
I wonder what's his thought process as he sits there

"Man, I'm hungry."

"My nieces were SO GORGEOUS! I really used to enjoy changing their diapers... I should tell more people about how good I am at changing diapers... Folks can't help but be impressed by that!"

"Still hungry."

"Remember that roast beef I cooked for Suzanne? I mean, I ended up eating the whole thing before she got home from work, and Suzanne had to have cold cereal for supper, but MAN! was that roast ever delicious. So succulent, covered with a flaming hot Cheetos glaze and served with an acerbic Mountain Dew reduction."

"I'm such a good chef... Why don't I have a girlfriend again? I bet I could get that cute nurse if I looked her in the eyes and said 'Hi, I'm Lucas (gotta remember to say MY OWN NAME HERE, easy to get confused) and it's nice to meet you...' Perhaps throw in a bit about my 'research'. She'll be so impressed!"

"Where should we go for our first date? Probably sushi. But pizza sounds good too. Ooh, steak is the classy move, actually..."

"Man, I'm hungry."

(etc)
 
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I’ve just gotten caught up on our boy and I have a speculative reconstruction of what happened regarding his most recent hospital stay:

-Lucas experiences symptoms that he mistakes for simply being “sick” and it doesn’t take much prompting to motivate Lucas to visit a clinic. Not only are adults giving him attention, he can also leer at any woman unfortunate enough to cross his gaze.

-Lucas gets seen by an Internist who glances down at Lucas’ medical history and then glances over at his reported symptoms and when they look up and gaze upon the corpulent visage that is Lucas immediately suspects the worst.

-Internist orders bloodwork that Lucas promptly forgets about. The results come back with an atypical presentation that suggests nephropathy. The Internist will proceed as if this is a worst case scenario and orders a percutaneous biopsy.

-The problem now facing the Internist is that obese patients require skilled Nephrologists and good image guiding technology. CT scans and ultrasound pose too much of a risk. This is a big ask even in large urban hospitals and to make matters worse, will require an examination from a Renal Pathologist. This is going to take some time to line up.

-If this is a worst case scenario and the Internist returns Lucas to the wild, he could very well die before getting to the ER, so they opt to admit him.

-The Internist gives Lucas the rundown and informs him that he might need dialysis pending the results of the biopsy. All Lucas hears is that he gets to stay in the hospital where he can lay in bed and pester nurses with petty requests and creepy small talk if they have a vagina and look to be under 40.

-During the length of his stay, Lucas is subjected to a battery of treatments that require IVs and oral medication to manage symptoms and if need be, keep him alive. Lucas mistakes the intravenous therapy as actual dialysis.

-The Pathologist’s report comes back and it looks like the ‘beetus lifestyle is subjecting his kidneys to undue stress and he probably avoided a mild kidney injury by a small margin. Thankfully, his stay in the hospital has gotten his numbers back to a comfortable range and he can be discharged.

-Internist tries to give Lucas a “Come to Jesus” speech and bluntly states that Lucas will die much sooner than later if his lifestyle doesn’t change. Lucas doesn’t understand the gravity of his situation and opts to nod along while thinking about how he could have totally asked that certain nurse out who was obviously into him because she smiled at one of his jokes.

-Lucas is free and tells everyone he has a clean bill of health whilst the state probably eats a six figure bill.
 
I’ve just gotten caught up on our boy and I have a speculative reconstruction of what happened regarding his most recent hospital stay:

-Lucas experiences symptoms that he mistakes for simply being “sick” and it doesn’t take much prompting to motivate Lucas to visit a clinic. Not only are adults giving him attention, he can also leer at any woman unfortunate enough to cross his gaze.

-Lucas gets seen by an Internist who glances down at Lucas’ medical history and then glances over at his reported symptoms and when they look up and gaze upon the corpulent visage that is Lucas immediately suspects the worst.

-Internist orders bloodwork that Lucas promptly forgets about. The results come back with an atypical presentation that suggests nephropathy. The Internist will proceed as if this is a worst case scenario and orders a percutaneous biopsy.

-The problem now facing the Internist is that obese patients require skilled Nephrologists and good image guiding technology. CT scans and ultrasound pose too much of a risk. This is a big ask even in large urban hospitals and to make matters worse, will require an examination from a Renal Pathologist. This is going to take some time to line up.

-If this is a worst case scenario and the Internist returns Lucas to the wild, he could very well die before getting to the ER, so they opt to admit him.

-The Internist gives Lucas the rundown and informs him that he might need dialysis pending the results of the biopsy. All Lucas hears is that he gets to stay in the hospital where he can lay in bed and pester nurses with petty requests and creepy small talk if they have a vagina and look to be under 40.

-During the length of his stay, Lucas is subjected to a battery of treatments that require IVs and oral medication to manage symptoms and if need be, keep him alive. Lucas mistakes the intravenous therapy as actual dialysis.

-The Pathologist’s report comes back and it looks like the ‘beetus lifestyle is subjecting his kidneys to undue stress and he probably avoided a mild kidney injury by a small margin. Thankfully, his stay in the hospital has gotten his numbers back to a comfortable range and he can be discharged.

-Internist tries to give Lucas a “Come to Jesus” speech and bluntly states that Lucas will die much sooner than later if his lifestyle doesn’t change. Lucas doesn’t understand the gravity of his situation and opts to nod along while thinking about how he could have totally asked that certain nurse out who was obviously into him because she smiled at one of his jokes.

-Lucas is free and tells everyone he has a clean bill of health whilst the state probably eats a six figure bill.
If that is more or less how it went then lucas won't do jack shit to change and he'll be right back in the hospital before too long with the same problem. Again and again until his kidneys are damaged enough to be fucked. He won't listen to his doctors because he never does. Just look at how he thought he was cured from diabetes after being institutionalized for awhile and kept on a normal diet for those places. He'll nod along, ignore anything the doctor says that involves criticizing his weight, health or diet, at best eat a few extra vegetables for a week until he decides he doesn't like them and/or they take too much money away from the food he likes, and then convince himself he's doing just fine and go right back to doing what he was doing before. That'll just put him back in the hospital. Probably fairly soon. His age, obesity and general health problems, not to mention years of hobo life have finally caught up to him. He's too stupid to realize shit changes when you hit your 40s and you can't get away with doing stupid shit to your body the older you get

Like I said before, lucas is a dead man walking, one way or another. He's just too stupid to realize it. Its not if its when
 
I say it was all bullshit. Lucas pretended to try to apply to a job, then he pretended to be sick, then he pretended to be in the hospital. You're not interesting when you're not filming yourself scream in the street, Lucas. Now on top of everything else you are just plain boring
Lucas isn't even remotely capable of coming up with a fake story like that. He doesn't know jack shit about kidneys or treatment, let along enough to make up stories about biopsies and dialysis. Plus it fits with his age, diabetes, obesity and the fact he's been puking his guts out regularly when he shouldn't be
 
I say it was all bullshit. Lucas pretended to try to apply to a job, then he pretended to be sick, then he pretended to be in the hospital. You're not interesting when you're not filming yourself scream in the street, Lucas. Now on top of everything else you are just plain boring
I'm tending to agree. There is something very fishy about his whole story.

As far as the Creeper not being intelligent enough to come up with story about "his current hospital stay" we need to keep in mind he has been treated in a hospital for the diabetic sores on his feet several times that we know of. When he was homeless and staying House Charity he went to the hospital for foot sores and that is why HOC let him stay in during the day. 2nd time the hospital treated him for the diabetic foot sores was during his stay at Mallon Place and had to wear the diabetic sandles. During those hospital visits the doctors could well have told him if he continues to disregard his diabetes and overall health it could lead to kidney failure, biopsies, and dialysis. So he would have had the information he needed to come up with the story.
 
They didn't keep him sitting around in the hospital for no reason and this dialysis stuff wasn't him trying to be clever. He isn't that smart. He doesn't know enough about kidney related shit to even come up with something like that if he wanted to. Plus he wouldn't have even if he was smart enough because it would make him look bad. He must have had at least one session done and this is his way of trying to trick people into believing he's still plenty good and theres totally nothing wrong with him. He's covering what really happened with lies as he always does when something reflects badly on him

Which is only reinforced by him saying this:


In other words lucas was told he needs to change his diet, get away from carbs, fats, large amounts of protein and sugar and start eating alot more vegetables or his kidneys are going eventually fail and kill him. As usual he takes what he was told by doctors, twists it around in his head and tries to make it sound like it was his own idea to do so and to get healthier to hide the fact its doctors orders and he's in terrible shape


No. Lucas is far too stupid to come up with renal problems, biopsies and dialysis and his shit health and inability to eat chips, drink a beer or smoke a joint without puking his guts out aren't only very well known they're literally on video. The symptoms are real, he was in the hospital and was there for alot longer than he would have been if it was something minor. No way he didn't have at least one session of dialysis done. There was no other reason to keep him that long or for them to be doing or saying that stuff to him



The problems with this theory are a) the shit health is real, the puking after doing things that shouldn't be causing puking are real and on video multiple times, he has no reason to make shit up about puking in an uber and is too stupid to come up with the things he said were happening himself b) even if they wanted him back in the nursing home part of mallon its likely they filled his place as soon as he was out, its not like they can just squeeze him into an already occupied room. He'd have had to be put somewhere else that had space and c) he's been in the hospital for days and is already trying to retcon and manipulate people into believing an obvious bs story that he's totally healthy and changing his diet of his own accord. He can't keep what he's saying now consistent or say it in a manner that makes sense. So he is trying to cover up what happened at the hospital

Just because he took pictures in the hospital other times doesn't mean he would this time. If anything he'd make a point of not taking pictures that he knows would come back to haunt him later when he tried to claim he was plenty good and healthy. No way he'd post pictures of being hooked up to dialysis, post biopsy or looking sick as fuck. Too much of his story about what happened and how and recent incidents fit with kidney problems
Yep, I agree 100%. Lucas is far too stupid and lazy to fake something like this.
 
I doubt Wern knows the word renal, and thought dialysis was the same as rehydration via IV.
When he googled what it was, he realized it didn’t make him look plenty good so is lying now.

You don’t spend days in the hospital for dehydration unless you’ve been stranded without water.
He never used the word renal. He used the word kidney -- kidney dialysis and kidney biopsy. I still say his hospital story sounds fishy.

ETA:
Lost 60 in 2 mo. Does not sound to me like a healthy type of weight loss.
 
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