- Joined
- Feb 1, 2020
Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks
- Thread starter SpacePanther
- Start date
- Joined
- May 11, 2019
What a charmer!
"I just ate about 14 of these things. I'm gonna have a dooky tonight!"
Emily Post would be appalled.
He would make a perfect life partner for Chantal. They could talk about their shits, share insulin and eat until their kidneys call out for mercy...Or at least they need to collab on a yuckbang,
"I just ate about 14 of these things. I'm gonna have a dooky tonight!"
Emily Post would be appalled.
He would make a perfect life partner for Chantal. They could talk about their shits, share insulin and eat until their kidneys call out for mercy...Or at least they need to collab on a yuckbang,
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2015
He says he had a beer and a Mai Tai and spent $15. So how is $56 “not enough”..? Lucas is retarded.
I would absolutely love to see fat, greasy-haired Lucas in his best crumpled, stained shirt sitting slouched in a bar corner alone staring at women, grasping a Mai Tai.
I hope they filled it with fruit, flowers and a fucking umbrella like he’s some drunk mom on a cruise; the juxtaposition would be incredible.
I would absolutely love to see fat, greasy-haired Lucas in his best crumpled, stained shirt sitting slouched in a bar corner alone staring at women, grasping a Mai Tai.
I hope they filled it with fruit, flowers and a fucking umbrella like he’s some drunk mom on a cruise; the juxtaposition would be incredible.
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2018
Unreal. Someone actually took this filthy cow to a bar and gave him $56? What the hell? I thought the guy who told him this was just messing with him.
Lucas just gets more hateable. Someone just dropped over $50 on his bovine ass and he has the audacity to complain about it not being more money? GREEDY! YOU'RE GREEDY! And if it was 6 PM why did Lucas not ask the guy to go at 10 PM? I'm sure Lucas would want to stay at this guy's place. Would be funny if the cow had to stay out all night cause the nursing home was all locked up.
So Lucas said he spent $15? What happened to the rest of the money? He could have bought a zoomer bae a drink with the rest. Say one of his magic lines about how beautiful she is.
God, I wish there were photos or videos evidence of the cow at the bar. We have not had any Lucas in the wild pics in a while.
I bet he will be mooooing and reeeing about this for days. The entitled, fat autist. If this guy was genuinely trying to be nice and help Lucas and not just trying to mess with him, he won't do this again.
And another thing, he is making all this about the guy being a theist? Seriously? That was the cause of him not bringing more money? Lucas comes to the stupidest conclusions.
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2020
Lucas: "Damn those materialistic theist bigots. All they care about is what you can give them."
Also Lucas: "I told him that $56 is not enough to even get up to bat. Why are theists so greedy."
I won't say there's no amount of money that it would take to take for Lucas to get laid, but there's no possible way for him to accrue the amount of money necessary. IDK why he moos about God's non-existence is the reason he can't get laid. Prayer is the only plausible option he's got left at this point.
- Joined
- May 15, 2020
Back to religious sperging.
Super-genius Wern asking why the skeletal remains of a few specific characters from a book haven’t been found. About 100 billion people have likely existed, thus far, and Lucas is shocked we haven’t found like 30 of them
it annoys me how bad he is at atheism, it isn’t a position which needs defense but he tries and does so poorly. You know who else we don’t have the bones of, Lucas? Socrates. That philosopher you try (fail) to reference because he’s the only one you’ve ever heard of. The bones we have are vastly outnumbered by the bones we don’t have for 99%+ of humanity.
He also claims we find fossilized humans from a couple thousand years ago. Fossilized. A process that takes many thousands or millions of years. What a fucking idiot.
Super-genius Wern asking why the skeletal remains of a few specific characters from a book haven’t been found. About 100 billion people have likely existed, thus far, and Lucas is shocked we haven’t found like 30 of them
it annoys me how bad he is at atheism, it isn’t a position which needs defense but he tries and does so poorly. You know who else we don’t have the bones of, Lucas? Socrates. That philosopher you try (fail) to reference because he’s the only one you’ve ever heard of. The bones we have are vastly outnumbered by the bones we don’t have for 99%+ of humanity.He also claims we find fossilized humans from a couple thousand years ago. Fossilized. A process that takes many thousands or millions of years. What a fucking idiot.
WonderWino
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
The replies to that post have gotten better:
He's wigging the fuck out in those posts
This situation not going the way he expected it to is really setting him off. He seems to have forgotten he was supposed to bring $100 as well, according to his previous videos. Plus he's still talking nonsense. By his own admission he bought himself a beer and a mai tai and blew the money that way. Nothing was stopping him from ordering some zoomer a drink except his own greed and stupidityJeremiah the Bullfrog said:
This fixation on a specific $100 per man is just bizarre as well. Fits into lucas's usual autistic things have to be an exact specific way and done in exactly the way he says they do to work like he's casting a fucking magic spell. Thats autism and OCD shit right there
Even by his usual standards lucas has shown himself to be exceptionally greedy and stupid in this situation. You have to wonder who this guy is that gave him the money. Another creep like him or somebody trying to set him up to make a fool of himself? and lucas sitting in some dark corner of the bar eyefucking middle aged women who are having after work cocktails and drinking a mai tai would have been quite the sight. and you just know thats exactly who would have been at the bar at 6pm. No way he was seeing the zoomer baes he was expecting, just middle aged working women and some boomers. He must have been seething like a sith. Yet no doubt he'll try to manipulate this guy into doing it again with more money
and of course he twists around the whole event in his swiss cheese brain to turn it into some batshit mental lunacy about theists. The fuck does religion have to do with not bringing as much money as he expected to a bar? and again lucas conveniently left out the part where he was supposed to bring an equal amount, which he clearly did not
Even for lucas thats retarded reasoning. Aside from the fact asking for fossils is bizarre as we're talking about remains from only a few thousand years ago, why the fuck would he assume you'd expect to find the bodies of any of these people given the amount of time and history of the region? Is he not aware that aside from a literal handful of people, virtually nobody famous from that era has left a body to find? Perhaps he should ask why we haven't found caesar or agustus's remains (hint: they were cremated lucas), or maybe cleopatras (probably underwater and destroyed thousands of years ago) or maybe william the conqueror (I mean we have what? a shin bone or two left?) The ancient egyptians are pretty much the sole exception to the rule that bodies rarely survive more than a few centuries, even without the changes to the region that can easily lead to their loss or destruction, and even they're pretty rare at this pointVoidFace said:Super-genius Wern asking why the skeletal remains of a few specific characters from a book haven’t been found. About 100 billion people have likely existed, thus far, and Lucas is shocked we haven’t found like 30 of them
He also claims we find fossilized humans from a couple thousand years ago…fossilized. A process that takes many thousands or millions of years. What a fucking idiot.
The idea that he would expect to find the physical remains of people mentioned in the bible is absurd. I mean really, does he expect a grave somewhere that says 'here lies jesus' or some shit? Even if you were to find such a body you'd never be able to prove its identity. You don't see him denying caesar or agustus didn't exist because we don't have their bodies. Plato, ariistotle and socrates lived centuries before most people mentioned in the bible, we don't have their bodies either, but lucas doesn't think he's being clever by claiming they don't exist. Let me guess lucas.... we know they existed because they wrote books that still exist today right? Well where do you think the inspiration to write the bible came from lucas?
So the greedy demented POS wanted for his "buddy" to provide $100 per man. Instead of $200 the buddy had $56. It is also total bullshit his wingman told him not to take money. I hope the fool that took him to the bar finds out what the POS Creeper is saying about him.
I'm thinking the wingman purposely took him to the bar early at 6pm when there are not many women.
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- Joined
- Feb 1, 2020
The fact that no one has taken him to a gay bar is a travesty. Or to something like a Drag show.
- Joined
- Apr 19, 2022
I think Lucas is making up the bar story, maybe he thinks he's fooling us or something or just trying to look interesting. But he's glued to his phone, you're telling me he wouldn't go to a bar and not upload photos/videos?
Back in 2019 the Creeper went to a bar called the Globe. He took pics/video of the young women at the bar, posted to his facebook that he was using the video/pic for fap material. Word got back to bar management and the Creeper got banned. He probably thinks this time around if he posts pics/video to his social media he is going to get the banned again. I do remember the Creeper saying after the Globe banning that he'd gotten word he'd been banned from all the bars in Spokane. After 5 yrs the bar staff my not be keeping an eye out for the Creeper to show up.
ETA:
Creeper is still fuming:
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- Joined
- Apr 19, 2022
I think you may be right, he definitely seems pissed about this $56 fiasco. Crazy to think the Wern may have actually learned something
Fatal Walter
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2019
Goddamn, the greed of Lucas Werner really needs a sequel. I know how much the first one pissed him off. I can't imagine acting this ungrateful to someone giving me 50 dollars. He not only blames him but all theists and the God he doesn't believe in but never shuts up about.
- Joined
- Sep 30, 2015
$10 says the “buddy” told him he was ready to go, Lucas asked him how much cash he had on him, and when he answered “$56” Lucas had a menty b and refused to go.
He was already ready to pussy out and this just gave him an excuse.
Then he spins it to what he thinks is in his “favor” for people to take his side (“what kind of buddy are you, why would you think that’s enough, well I still definitely went and had alcohol drinks that I can remember the names of… uhhh a Mai Tai” etc) and rants about it on YouTube for sympathy.
Since anyone who views his content is very aware of him and his bullshit, it doesn’t go well and he has another defensive menty b in the comments.
The end.
He was already ready to pussy out and this just gave him an excuse.
Then he spins it to what he thinks is in his “favor” for people to take his side (“what kind of buddy are you, why would you think that’s enough, well I still definitely went and had alcohol drinks that I can remember the names of… uhhh a Mai Tai” etc) and rants about it on YouTube for sympathy.
Since anyone who views his content is very aware of him and his bullshit, it doesn’t go well and he has another defensive menty b in the comments.
The end.
For the Creeper to be fuming mad not only because of the money but also that they went to the bar early at 6pm and dumping on the wingman because of it , I do believe they went to the bar yesterday.
ETA:
He is wearing his "science" shirt in those videos. Must have worn it yesterday to the bar thinking it would make him look intelligent.
ETA2:
The Creeper still pissed at the wingman.
Hey Lucas the Mallon Place Creeper,
Your "logic" got you fired from McDonalds and Walmart, the only 2 jobs you've had in the last 25 yrs.
ETA3:
Creeper is the "logical" one so he's planning the next go round- wingman is going to have $150 and the Creeper several hundred. Wingman doesn't have a car so they'll get a Uber to get home. They are going to have to wait until spring and for the Creeper to have a job.
Until the Creeper has a job -- well his "logical" plan went out the window.
Wait --wingman has a house and a girlfriend but no car? Has the creeper even been to wingmans's house.
Back to -- prove there is a god theists-- give the Creeper a girlfriend.
Hey Creep -- why are you giving illogical theists the job of getting you a girlfriend. You are the "logical" one, waddle your mangy ass to a bar and get yourself a girlfriend. Oh wait -- you are a chicken shit to go alone.
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- Joined
- Oct 27, 2018
I am almost convinced that this guy is messing with Lucas. Especially with the whole "I prayed over this" line. He would know that would set the cow off. I know we shouldn't tip the cows, but if you're gonna go cow tipping you need to document with videos or photos so we can all laugh at them.
Lucas is complicating just a very simple trip to a bar. Wait till Spring to try to go back to the bar. Lol! Just like a theist to not bring enough money to a bar to pick up women. Totally!
And Lucas will believe in God if he meets a Gen Z woman at a bar? Okay? God, Lucas is being such an grateful dickhead about this whole thing. I'm still leaning on this guy messing with Lucas, but if not he has to be a huge sped.
And Lucas having several hundred dollars? Not likely. I don't think Lucas will ever work again. And it sounds like this guy must be almost as broke as Lucas. Many people use one of those evil credit cards that Lucas laments so much. They are safer than cash and give out rewards points for using. If this guy just had $56 available, then he must be pretty destitute.
I hope they do try this again. Lucas will chimp the fuck out when a Gen Z woman tells him to get away from her and her friends. That could potentially end in an arrest.
Lucas is complicating just a very simple trip to a bar. Wait till Spring to try to go back to the bar. Lol! Just like a theist to not bring enough money to a bar to pick up women. Totally!
And Lucas will believe in God if he meets a Gen Z woman at a bar? Okay? God, Lucas is being such an grateful dickhead about this whole thing. I'm still leaning on this guy messing with Lucas, but if not he has to be a huge sped.
And Lucas having several hundred dollars? Not likely. I don't think Lucas will ever work again. And it sounds like this guy must be almost as broke as Lucas. Many people use one of those evil credit cards that Lucas laments so much. They are safer than cash and give out rewards points for using. If this guy just had $56 available, then he must be pretty destitute.
I hope they do try this again. Lucas will chimp the fuck out when a Gen Z woman tells him to get away from her and her friends. That could potentially end in an arrest.
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2020
Full on schizo sperging. Fibonacci sequence. Telomeres. Cosmology. The works.
One aspect I didn't think too much of is the alleged age gap relationship between Schizo Stacey and MAGA Chad. Just the fact Lucas's dream scenario occured right in front of him is hilarious. It's proof that it can happen! Unfortunately, he'll never understand that it won't be in the cards for him, because he's him.
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Yea, it sounds like this wingman is screwing with the Creeper. It's likely the wingman does have a vehicle but doesn't want for Lucas to be bugging him for rides.
I don't believe Schizo Stacey and MAGA chad are in a romantic relationship. She hangs out with the MAGA Chad to keep the creeper off her back.
ETA:
It is never going to sink into his deranged brain - if a Gen Z is into middle aged men she will not choose the defective package named Lucas Werner. He was defective even for Schizo Stacy.
Magical babies
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- Joined
- Feb 1, 2020
That's what I'm assuming, but from the Homo Wernus subspecies perspective, it's a true!' honest relationship and proof positive that she gap relationships do happen.
Homo Wernus is defined by it's inability to perceive itself as an individual while having an incredible, narcissistic ego. The creature will never understand that he exists as a unique entity and is perceived as a such by it's distant relative, the homosapien. Thankfully, the species will never interbreed with each other.
- Joined
- May 15, 2020
The term “Spring-Autumn romance” has made its return, and apparently now the Fibonacci sequence is literally embedded in DNA. Lucas the biologist, everyone.
The only thing really missing now is homelessness. Here’s hoping it’s soon
The only thing really missing now is homelessness. Here’s hoping it’s soon