- Joined
- Dec 22, 2017
If I were a woman I'd be like, "You walked 15 feet with a bag of groceries?!? Oh I must have your telomeres ubermensch! Please grace me with the cauliflower and ketchup poptart!"
Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks
- Thread starter SpacePanther
- Start date
- Joined
- Dec 22, 2018
I like how Catfishing Kayla knows the exact phrases to lure ol Lucas in. Daddy... oh god, barf barf barf.
- Joined
- Apr 25, 2018
Is Lucas's appalling diet another girlfriend-signing tactic? He was originally pretentious about it ("Artisnal Pizza") but now might be seen to be making flailing attempts at the so random ironic pizza tattoo/I thought you said MORE FRIES culture of five+ years ago. He could just be a degenerate who can only badly cook three things, but the notion seems crude and outdated enough to possibly be an angle.
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2015
Literally everything he does is a poorly attempt to be a predator to young women.
Lucas can't cook we know this, and hamburger spaghetti is not a chef's masterpiece, it's the shit you eat when nothing else in the house and cleaning pantry out.
Much like any thing else with life, Lucas has no real bearing, that bag at max is 30lbs. He could just swap his arms, ffs. He thinks this makes him sound like he just finished an Iron man race but because he can't grasp what reality is he doesn't know this just shows the piss poor shape he's in. Reminds me of Chris Chan and the 5000 lb dog house he picks up.
Garfieldchu
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Oct 5, 2015
I'm afraid to ask, but what sort of culinary abortion is hamburger spaghetti, and why are slices of imitation cheese product involved?
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2015
I assume he's doing some super crappy pasta in meat sauce. God knows what he's doing with the kraft singles. I'm fearful to know. I'm sure he will post the car wreck up and act like he's Gordon Ramsy.
- Joined
- Feb 13, 2018
Bolognese with pasteurized cheese food product.
- Joined
- Nov 5, 2014
It’s also interesting that any time someone comes along who is genuinely concerned with Lucas and wants to help by telling him his methods won’t work or so and so is a catfish he responds with the blicc but if you come at him like a 16 year old closeted gay boy trying to trick a hot guy into sending you dick pics he eats it up and loses his shit if anyone speaks ill of ‘her’.
- Joined
- Mar 9, 2015
He's not very bright to start and he's such a disgusting pervert he's blinded by reality, so he hears what he wants and automatically assumes it to be true out of hope with out a second thought.
- Joined
- May 20, 2019
>I go your pussy like soft serve without a spoon
I mean I prefer the term "eat that pussy like a bulldog eating oatmeal" but whatever floats your retarded boat.
I mean I prefer the term "eat that pussy like a bulldog eating oatmeal" but whatever floats your retarded boat.
- Joined
- Jul 21, 2015
- Joined
- Mar 7, 2018
Lucas is either gonna kill himself or eat a cheeseburger.
- Joined
- Mar 22, 2019
looks like math is what sent the Wern into a suicidal, guilt trippy spiral this time.
Suicide again, how many times does that make. His short circuited brain does not compute that no young hottie is going to go "hold on Lucas baby, don't do yourself in. I'm on my way to bounce on your teeny dick."
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2018
"You'll ruin my schooling"? Who will? "You have your ultimatum"? What is that? To bring him a woman? We all know he is going to eat a cheeseburger, be he just bought all that ground beef and American cheese.
- Joined
- Nov 5, 2014
He’s dialing it back.
What rash thing is he going to do? Wear real pants to campus instead of his batman pantaloons. Not eat cheese for a week. Clean his filthy hole. Do his laundry. I can't wait to find out.
His such a fucking ass. Complaining the world doesn't offer help, when he's supported by tax payer money, and even gets the left over financial aid. But oh man, the world does nothing for him if it doesn't plop a girl on his teeny willy.
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ShortRound
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Apr 13, 2019
Can we get him and Russel Greer in the same room? Ill chip money. lets put them in the same room with some meth and a typewriter, I bet they crank out the greatest sex story never told.
- Joined
- Oct 27, 2018
I kind of hope he goes back to the government needs to get him a girlfriend. Kind of like his idea for "Makayla".
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- Joined
- Jun 4, 2017
Go ahead and click a-log, but his mewling has long since ceased to amuse me. I look at this man and all I see is a mother's pain and the stink of unwashed belly button. The next time he makes suicidal threats, someone needs to call the cops so he can get magdumped.
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