Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Kugelsak Kastengrus 6th]

Forget these arms honies, Stubby Older Daddy can fuck your pee-holes so good with this prosthetic leg. Come and get it. I’ll be a one-legged millionaire in 25 years.

I doubt any size queen would be willing to handle getting stump fucked by the Wern.

Amputee Lucas would be awesome. Hobbling around in crutches while screeching how sexually skilled he is. Or better, erratically wheeling himself all over Spokane while making vids about his superior mating potential.

If we ever see amputee Lucas, he'll be confined to a wheelchair. He doesn't have the stamina to use crutches, and I doubt he'll be able to wheel himself for long periods of time.

 

[BowlOfDick]

If we ever see amputee Lucas, he'll be confined to a wheelchair. He doesn't have the stamina to use crutches, and I doubt he'll be able to wheel himself for long periods of time.

I expect that he’d expect to be propelled everywhere by a state appointed carer/teenager.

 

[downloads]

View attachment 1514402

A-Fucking gross
B-That was not caused by being hit by a bat it's a scrape and not really a bad one except for the fact
C-It's dirty and infected

The idiot probably has MRSA again

 

[mothman96]

He had a conversation with @DeletedSoul , the owner of Sofalaw. Sofalaw is a hate group. Everyone else is at fault, the Gen Z's that won't fuck him, Sofalaw, KF etc., all responsible for "triggering" his behavior. Someone here already pointed out his "Deny everything and make counter accusations" .

And he keeps trying to make all Gen X just like him.
Hey Lucas, how many Gen X Predators do you know that it's "we".

 

[Pump Meat]

God I hope he finds a lawyer who'll represent him because the pettifogger who takes up the cause of Werner will be a bundle of personality just like our boi here.

 

[WhiskerBiscuit]

gone so fast. He really doesn’t understand anything.

 

[mothman96]

View attachment 1515041

gone so fast. He really doesn’t understand anything.

He's so stupid. If a lawyer researches him, he's going to wonder why Lucas isn't locked up in a mental institution.

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

Two thoughts about Luke's response to sofalaw:

1. Lucas sure loves the word exacerbate recently, but he has no f****** clue how to use it correctly. Like many of the other words he mispronounces and misuses. How long did it take him to stop mispronouncing misogyny? It was 3 years right?

2. Speaking of the Instagram interaction, Lucas says the guy who started sofalaw "came up to him". As if someone walked up to him on the street. He's done this before, where he describes internet interactions as if they happened IRL.

It's disconcerting when you think that someone who has such a loose grip on reality like Lucas would use such unclear phrasing, but frankly, it's the least of his problems.

Man, Lucas's mind is GONE. His attempted logic in this response is: because 8chan disavowed liability for an attack but their presence caused the attack to happen supposedly, therefore sofalaw and kiwi Farms, even with a disavowal of violence, are still responsible for the violence.

To say nothing of the fact that getting a pro bono attorney to take such a uncertain legal action on is incredibly unlikely, obviously, and as soon as any attorney took one look at Lucas and Googled his name they would run. And laugh.

 

[ThomasAudley]

Lucas thinks because he has a free public defender that it'll be easy to get a pro bono attorney to represent him in suing CloudFlare, Facebook, and Chris Hanson? A lawyer would be stupid to do that that on contingency but to do it pro bono? Yeah, as Lucas says, "shouldn't be too hard." I also noticed he did not mention Starbucks today.

And what are Lucas's damages here? He never went to the hospital because the attack never happened, but assuming he did, he doesn't pay for medical bills. He's a leech. His reputation was in the toilet prior to any of this, and he hasn't worked in 20 years so he's not losing any wages because of the attack. If anything his reputation is so poor it makes me skeptical of completely unrelated, innocent parties such as Werner Sausage for potentially having a common ancestor when they were raiding Scandinavia or whatever. As an aside, I was rewatching the film Das Boot recently and one of the characters is LT Werner and all I could think during the movie is LT Werner down there in the u-boat underwater ranting "WHERE THE WOMEN AT, WHERE THE PARTY AT" while his crew mates tell him to STFU cause they're trying to evade detection.

 

[Da Dude123]

Maybe he can take a page out of fellow Lolcow Russell Greer and file the lol suit pro se? Of course, Lucas does not have the legal training that Rusty has. And Lucas in my opinion is way more lazy than Rusty. It would be funny, though. Of course Tubby has no conception of how things work and would probably reee and moo when he saw the costs to file and would go sulking back to the bum shelter.

 

[ThomasAudley]

Maybe he can take a page out of fellow Lolcow Russell Greer and file the lol suit pro se? Of course, Lucas does not have the legal training that Rusty has. And Lucas in my opinion is way more lazy than Rusty. It would be funny, though. Of course Tubby has no conception of how things work and would probably reee and moo when he saw the costs to file and would go sulking back to the bum shelter.

Yeah good point, let's try to put a positive spin on it for Lucas when he reads this.

You do NOT need an attorney to file a lawsuit!

You do NOT need to pay filing fees if you are a broke atheist (https://www.courts.wa.gov/forms/?fa=forms.contribute&formID=87)

You CAN handwrite your lawsuit (https://www.washingtonlawhelp.org/resource/how-to-format-court-documents)

You are ENTITLED to justice against the BIGOT Chris Hanson, the AGEPHOBES at CloudFlare, and the CLASSISTS at SOFALAW and Kiwi Farms.

 

[mothman96]

Yeah good point, let's try to put a positive spin on it for Lucas when he reads this.

You do NOT need an attorney to file a lawsuit!

You do NOT need to pay filing fees if you are a broke atheist (https://www.courts.wa.gov/forms/?fa=forms.contribute&formID=87)

You CAN handwrite your lawsuit (https://www.washingtonlawhelp.org/resource/how-to-format-court-documents)

You are ENTITLED to justice against the BIGOT Chris Hanson, the AGEPHOBES at CloudFlare, and the CLASSISTS at SOFALAW and Kiwi Farms.

He's incompetent, couldn't even fill out his community college application on his own. A college advisor did it for him. Just think of him filling out the forms and filing his own lawsuit.

 

[DeletedSoul]

So yes, that was me which inspired today's mania rage. Here are the screenshots of the exchange we had, after I left a comment on his last SOFALAW photo offering to chat:

 

[Draxx them Sklounst]

I don't understand why you waste your time trying to be reasonable with him, it just ain't there.

 

[DeletedSoul]

Also, the two followup videos ("great grandparents" and "Christianity") give us some very interesting tidbits.

1. Lucas commits yet ANOTHER Freudian slip and names Gen Z as "10-24 years old." That is not a typo.

2. Lucas mentions cockblocking and violence at bars, which seems to me to be a pretty clear indicator that he's thinking of the "attack" at Jimmy'z.

3. In "Christianity" Lucas veers off into a detailed discussion about the difference between "assault" and "battery," in order to make the point that while assault does not mean actually physically hurting someone, it still counts as violence. He specifically uses Jesus chasing money changers with a whip (threatening with a deadly weapon) as an example of this.

Combine this with our preexisting knowledge that *someone* was charged with 3rd degree assault next to Jimmy'z on the night that he claims that the attack happened, and we get confirmation of my theory:

Lucas was creeping on women across from Jimmy'z that night. Someone-either a bouncer/bar employee or a bystander-told Lucas to fuck off and stop being a creep, and at some point threatened him with a baseball bat or some other weapon to get him to comply.

Lucas, being Lucas, ran to the cops for "protection" and our hero was charged with 3rd degree assault for their trouble. In the ensuing days, Lucas inflated this incident into an attack by SOFALAW agents where he was actually hit with the weapon, which is where we're at today.

The truth of the incident is heavily on his mind since I asked him directly for evidence of the attack, or of any affiliation with SOFALAW, because he has neither.

*hangs up my elkstalker hat and smokes my pipe*

I don't understand why you waste your time trying to be reasonable with him, it just ain't there.

I had his attention already. Figured that calmly challenging him on his bullshit would produce as much of a lulzy response as any.

 

[Draxx them Sklounst]

Eh, a noble endeavor, but all he did was double down on the stupid.


You tried

 

[Da Dude123]

I did not hear about the 3rd Degree Assault. Where did you see this or hear about this?

Combine this with our preexisting knowledge that *someone* was charged with 3rd degree assault next to Jimmy'z on the night that he claims that the attack happened, and we get confirmation of my theory:

Lucas was creeping on women across from Jimmy'z that night. Someone-either a bouncer/bar employee or a bystander-told Lucas to fuck off and stop being a creep, and at some point threatened him with a baseball bat or some other weapon to get him to comply.

Lucas, being Lucas, ran to the cops for "protection" and our hero was charged with 3rd degree assault for their trouble. In the ensuing days, Lucas inflated this incident into an attack by SOFALAW agents where he was actually hit with the weapon, which is where we're at today.

The truth of the incident is heavily on his mind since I asked him directly for evidence of the attack, or of any affiliation with SOFALAW, because he has neither.

*hangs up my elkstalker hat and smokes my pipe*

 

[DeletedSoul]

I think some of what you intended to type was lost in translation.

As for the 3rd degree assault, someone consulted a crime report site of some sort and found a report of 3rd degree assault next to Jimmy'z on the night in question. It was discussed in SOFALAW.

 

[GoutfootHorseface]

Man I hope he tries to pursue this, could be hilarious and the amount of venom he ends up spewing when it’s explained to him that he has no case will be delightful.

 

[Patchwork Ragdoll]

Fat ass is definitely back peddling. After he explained the difference between "assault" and "assault and battery" he's making it clear he plans to sue for assault. So basically by his own admission he was not attacked. People may have approached him and yelled mean words at him and called him a pedo and made him piss his pants, but he was not actually struck!