Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[Trainwreck]

I propose to celebrate Lucas's 41st birthday all us KF get together for the 1st annual KF Orgy & Buffet. We'll furnish a huge hall with the finest silk sheets, plush pillows, and comfy furniture. The buffet will be fit for a king, prime rib, artisan pizza, and champagne. Opulence as far as the eye can see, our greed on full display and we feast, and drink, and fuck. All while purposely excluding poor Lucas. Of course all males are required to wear flat billed hats and bring all your extra hoarded women to share during the fuck fest.

We can do it at my house. I have a hot tub!

 

[Fatal Walter]

What a fucking creep. He should really stop speculating about my sex life. I can only imagine how creepy he is toward women he's attracted to. Lucas, I'm going to ruin you again on youtube if you don't stop creeping on me. And you outweigh me by a little over a hundred pounds, if you're trying to call me fat. Fatty.

This is a pretty petty post for me but he just doesn't shut the fuck up and it's all retarded speculation based on nothing. I'd feel dumber even just replying.

 

[Wernology]

View attachment 1561735
What a fucking creep. He should really stop speculating about my sex life. I can only imagine how creepy he is toward women he's attracted to. Lucas, I'm going to ruin you again on youtube if you don't stop creeping on me. And you outweigh me by a little over a hundred pounds, if you're trying to call me fat. Fatty.

This is a pretty petty post for me but he just doesn't shut the fuck up and it's all retarded speculation based on nothing. I'd feel dumber even just replying.

Man, the projection in that text and video is amazing it's so strong.

From dms in this thread he's just as creepy, aggressive, and demanding with women.

A around a garbage tier person.

 

[WonderWino]

One thing Lucas never really mentions if what if a woman has her own car? I know he has stated that cars were just designed to be used to hoard women. What if a woman has her own car?

'Presenting the new 2021 model Ford Explorer, a new design for aging generation X'ers. Dual antilock breaks, climate control, electric seats and windows, dual beam headlights, onstar navigation system and just look at that trunk! All the space you need to seat up to 12 people for all your zoomer bae hoarding needs. Starting at only $55,000 (plus tax) the future is here: test drive one at your local retailer today'

Ya boi lookin' ready for dat loony bin.....PRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAP!!!!

Holy shit....between that zoned out insane expression and the gown hes wearing he legitimately looks like a literal mental patient in that pic. The fact that he thought it was a good idea to post a pic of himself like that is....unsettling. He really does have zero self awareness of how that looks

Lucas tells the story of the girl he had a bath with, but didn't get sexual

So....his mother then?

Hey @wenttobermuda , we can add another word to the "Gallouse" list:

Speaking of which I put 'gallouse' into google to see what came up and this is what I got. Clearly an automated page but just as nonsensical as anything lucas would say or us the word for. Somehow I find that rather amusing

A around a garbage tier person.

Come on now, don't insult garbage like that. Garbage can be useful, it can be recycled into something else. Lucas is just all around useless

 

[mothman96]

View attachment 1561573
See if this makes any sense to you: Lucas was "finger-banging" a girl in the back of a car, a black girl, but he couldn't enjoy it because he has gastroesophageal reflux disease. Aha. Hmmmm. Sure.

The finger banging the black girl happened in 2014 right. Here is his 1st "version" of the tale. He "totally got laid". I give him that he talked to a black girl and she had a white car. The rest is what he wanted to happen that he wants to make into reality. Also to give the impression that his sexual experience goes beyond Suzanne.
And he brought up Kiki, the black girl he allegedly hand lunch with. Now he adds in she has a kid and he doesn't want be a stepfather. No mention of the child before this. Guess he also "forgot" he said she has a white boyfriend.

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

The finger banging the black girl happened in 2014 right. Here is his 1st "version" of the tale. He "totally got laid". I give him that he talked to a black girl and she had a white car. The rest is what he wanted to happen that he wants to make into reality. Also to give the impression that his sexual experience goes beyond Suzanne.
And he brought up Kiki, the black girl he allegedly hand lunch with. Now he adds in she has a kid and he doesn't want be a stepfather. No mention of the child before this. Guess he also "forgot" he said she has a white boyfriend.

View attachment 1561845

Good eye, to realize this was the 2014 mention of the black girl & being the same as his recent description of the girl that he took a bath with.

If I remember correctly, @QueenBurritoSupreme said that Lucas had told her that he had made this up.

And anything she says, I trust implicitly.

 

[INeedUhChickUnder26]

View attachment 1561371

Ya boi lookin' ready for dat loony bin.....PRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAP!!!!

Jesus Christ he looks fucking terrible, even for a 40 year old, mentally ill, homeless pederast.

But this got me thinking about something. As someone whose telomerase just now reached acceptable length (35 years old), I've been reflecting on where I am in life and how I don't want to wake up in 20-30 years and feel like I've wasted my life on the wrong things (e.g. daily grind, mindless, low-effort entertainment, etc.). I feel like this is probably a pretty normal thing for functioning adults to reflect upon.

Lucas literally wakes up in the AM and the first thoughts in his head and words out of his mouth are about his robo-cop sperm and his need to implant them in young unsuspecting women (or unwilling, either is fine with Lucas). All day, everyday...flatbills, super sperm, DINOs...rinse and repeat.

IMO there's nothing on earth that provides less value than Lucas Werner and his nonsensical cum ramblings. If Lucas survives his next decade, which isn't likely, he will undoubtedly spend it on the 'wrong things' and will have wasted his time on earth, which is fairly amusing in and of itself. But I can't help but be a little unsatisfied at the thought of it ending there.

As we've all seen, Lucas continues to experience negative consequences as a direct result of his anti-social behavior, which is, again, pretty funny. But without Lucas having that moment of realization, where it clicks that every single aspect of his shitty life is entirely his fault, that he will die alone because of his choices, actions, and abysmal genetics, I fear I'll be plagued with chronic telomerase overabundance as the Lucas Wener saga never quite reaches the climax I need.

 

[teleméres69]

Go for it, he's only gonna keep projecting his flaws onto you like the entitled manchild he is. Though if you're gonna you're probably gonna want to go over all of the creepy shit he's said over the years to really nail it in how vile he is. He might deny it in his sad little videos, but he's still gonna be seething seeing the screenshots and clips highlighted. And the arrest record with his weight since he's still insisting on that lie

View attachment 1561735
What a fucking creep. He should really stop speculating about my sex life. I can only imagine how creepy he is toward women he's attracted to. Lucas, I'm going to ruin you again on youtube if you don't stop creeping on me. And you outweigh me by a little over a hundred pounds, if you're trying to call me fat. Fatty.

This is a pretty petty post for me but he just doesn't shut the fuck up and it's all retarded speculation based on nothing. I'd feel dumber even just replying.

Man the years have really not been kind to Lucas, not that he wasnt ugly as shit back then. We all know Lucas is full of shit, no young women have ever wanted to be touched by him aside from Lacie, and even she wouldn't fuck Lucas. The only way Lucas will ever fuck an 18 year old is if she's intoxicated, a junkie, or he forces himself on her. He really doesn't realise how repulsive he is to the average person

The finger banging the black girl happened in 2014 right. Here is his 1st "version" of the tale. He "totally got laid". I give him that he talked to a black girl and she had a white car. The rest is what he wanted to happen that he wants to make into reality. Also to give the impression that his sexual experience goes beyond Suzanne.
And he brought up Kiki, the black girl he allegedly hand lunch with. Now he adds in she has a kid and he doesn't want be a stepfather. No mention of the child before this. Guess he also "forgot" he said she has a white boyfriend.

View attachment 1561845

In case it wasnt obvious, given how much of a compulsive liar Lucas is

Good eye, to realize this was the 2014 mention of the black girl & being the same as his recent description of the girl that he took a bath with.

If I remember correctly, @QueenBurritoSupreme said that Lucas had told her that he had made this up.

And anything she says, I trust implicitly.

It'll probably start to kick in when he reaches his 50s, assuming he lasts that long

Jesus Christ he looks fucking terrible, even for a 40 year old, mentally ill, homeless pederast.

But this got me thinking about something. As someone whose telomerase just now reached acceptable length (35 years old), I've been reflecting on where I am in life and how I don't want to wake up in 20-30 years and feel like I've wasted my life on the wrong things (e.g. daily grind, mindless, low-effort entertainment, etc.). I feel like this is probably a pretty normal thing for functioning adults to reflect upon.

Lucas literally wakes up in the AM and the first thoughts in his head and words out of his mouth are about his robo-cop sperm and his need to implant them in young unsuspecting women (or unwilling, either is fine with Lucas). All day, everyday...flatbills, super sperm, DINOs...rinse and repeat.

IMO there's nothing on earth that provides less value than Lucas Werner and his nonsensical cum ramblings. If Lucas survives his next decade, which isn't likely, he will undoubtedly spend it on the 'wrong things' and will have wasted his time on earth, which is fairly amusing in and of itself. But I can't help but be a little unsatisfied at the thought of it ending there.

As we've all seen, Lucas continues to experience negative consequences as a direct result of his anti-social behavior, which is, again, pretty funny. But without Lucas having that moment of realization, where it clicks that every single aspect of his shitty life is entirely his fault, that he will die alone because of his choices, actions, and abysmal genetics, I fear I'll be plagued with chronic telomerase overabundance as the Lucas Wener saga never quite reaches the climax I need.

 

[Stilgar of Troon]

Jesus Christ he looks fucking terrible, even for a 40 year old, mentally ill, homeless pederast.

But this got me thinking about something. As someone whose telomerase just now reached acceptable length (35 years old), I've been reflecting on where I am in life and how I don't want to wake up in 20-30 years and feel like I've wasted my life on the wrong things (e.g. daily grind, mindless, low-effort entertainment, etc.). I feel like this is probably a pretty normal thing for functioning adults to reflect upon.

Lucas literally wakes up in the AM and the first thoughts in his head and words out of his mouth are about his robo-cop sperm and his need to implant them in young unsuspecting women (or unwilling, either is fine with Lucas). All day, everyday...flatbills, super sperm, DINOs...rinse and repeat.

IMO there's nothing on earth that provides less value than Lucas Werner and his nonsensical cum ramblings. If Lucas survives his next decade, which isn't likely, he will undoubtedly spend it on the 'wrong things' and will have wasted his time on earth, which is fairly amusing in and of itself. But I can't help but be a little unsatisfied at the thought of it ending there.

As we've all seen, Lucas continues to experience negative consequences as a direct result of his anti-social behavior, which is, again, pretty funny. But without Lucas having that moment of realization, where it clicks that every single aspect of his shitty life is entirely his fault, that he will die alone because of his choices, actions, and abysmal genetics, I fear I'll be plagued with chronic telomerase overabundance as the Lucas Wener saga never quite reaches the climax I need.

I don't think the capacity for realisation is even in him, tbh. He's so invested in this topic now (and let's not forget his brain is broken as shit) that to abandon it would cause him to come completely unglued, I suspect.

 

[mothman96]

Bringing this forward. Women, be like a dog and love him.

 

[Khabib Zabeeb]

His name is Lucas werner and he's a slow learner
He thinks smoking herb makes him cool
He wants to fuck your daughter thinks underage is hotter
So now he prowls around a school.

Ode to Lucas

 

[INeedUhChickUnder26]

I don't think the capacity for realisation is even in him, tbh. He's so invested in this topic now (and let's not forget his brain is broken as shit) that to abandon it would cause him to come completely unglued, I suspect.

Correct. I don't think so either. Most of the time he's speaking in his videos he isn't even actively thinking about what he's talking about. Those aren't his organized thoughts, it's just the adult version of the ABC's for him. Straight memorization. Those already awkward, clunky phrases he uses incorrectly are not part of anyone's normal vocabulary, much less their most frequently used words.

I think he would have some sort of psychotic break if he was suddenly lucid for a day and realized that he has not only squandered, but actively destroyed, every opportunity and relationship he's ever had.

 

[Trainwreck]

I noticed that in the bathroom video he is "proving" the baseball bat assault by showing his skinned up knee that he names Officer Prim as the one who took the police report. What's funny about that is that Officer Prim works the downtown corridor precinct and pretty much every homeless person has come into contact with him at one point or another. I have a feeling that Prim was the one who told him that he needed to leave the park and Lucas zeroed in on the name on his uniform thinking it will make his made up "steel bat to the head" story believable.

 

[Da Dude123]

That sounds like a plenty good idea! Now we just need to figure out, where da party gonna be at (just don't tell Lucas)?

I propose to celebrate Lucas's 41st birthday all us KF get together for the 1st annual KF Orgy & Buffet. We'll furnish a huge hall with the finest silk sheets, plush pillows, and comfy furniture. The buffet will be fit for a king, prime rib, artisan pizza, and champagne. Opulence as far as the eye can see, our greed on full display and we feast, and drink, and fuck. All while purposely excluding poor Lucas. Of course all males are required to wear flat billed hats and bring all your extra hoarded women to share during the fuck fest.

 

[INeedUhChickUnder26]

I noticed that in the bathroom video he is "proving" the baseball bat assault by showing his skinned up knee that he names Officer Prim as the one who took the police report. What's funny about that is that Officer Prim works the downtown corridor precinct and pretty much every homeless person has come into contact with him at one point or another. I have a feeling that Prim was the one who told him that he needed to leave the park and Lucas zeroed in on the name on his uniform thinking it will make his made up "steel bat to the head" story believable.

He really is a complete dipshit, as if knowing a cop's name means anything when you're a documented public nuisance with a growing criminal record.

He rattled off half a dozen pieces of evidence he could produce (e.g. police report, hospital papers, video, etc.) that together prove his story to be true...I will blow Jason Perva if he ever produces even one of those pieces of 'evidence'. All this effort making videos pleading his case when all he has to do is show even one of those things to prove his story is even within the realm of possibilities.

 

[Amewsed]

Bringing this forward. Women, be like a dog and love him.
View attachment 1561937

The problem is that the reality for a hot young bae to run up to him and jump into his arms is literally to smell like sh*t. Why should they expect anything less?

Last time I checked, he had no canine love either.

 

[JuniperFalls]

Can I be the 8th? Because that sounds awesome.

That depends -- are you a Zoomer bae between ages 18 and 24? (If you are, I don't know what will happen on your 25th birthday. Hopefully Lucas will explain this at some point.)

You don't have to prove fertility, though. In fact, I'd prefer my hoard of hot girlfriends age 18-24 NOT have any babies, because if I had to support seven or eight kids then I could not afford to drive around in a bitchin' environmentally friendly Bernie-Sanders-approved van with my many hot Gen Z girlfriends, solving mysteries all day.

Gotta go now -- off to investigate claims there's a ghost haunting the old abandoned amusement park.

 

[Fatal Walter]

Well, there's at least a troll lurking under the bridges of Spokane but I don't think his identity is much of a mystery.

 

[Wernology]

Well, there's at least a troll lurking under the bridges of Spokane but I don't think his identity is much of a mystery.

Just throw a bucket of KFC at him and he'll let you pass.

 

[Stilgar of Troon]

Just throw a bucket of KFC at him and he'll let you pass.

I dunno, man; seems like a brick would be cheaper and more effective...