Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[MeganDodgedABullet]

I've heard of chicks slumming it, but not getting down into the most fetid branches of the sewers...

 

[Wernology]

Let's just pretend for a second that it's not a catfish, who the fuck eats two whole meat burritos before having sex. Imagine the fucking smell,
home boy would probably shit the bed before he could get his pants off.

And we all know how funny he finds destroying motel bathrooms after eating Mexican food. Maybe his fantasy dream girl finds uncontrollable farting and shitting a turn on. You never know with The Wern's bizarre fantasies.

 

[WonderWino]

I've heard of chicks slumming it, but not getting down into the most fetid branches of the sewers...

Well.....it could be her:

It sure comes off as something lucas would be into

 

[LeeLoo]

So, are we taking bets on tonight? Straight up stood up? Handcuffed to the bed and robbed? Jason Perva shows up?

 

[holeinthedark]

LOL Perva, Dan, Isaac, and Chris Hansen show up to the motel instead of a zoomer ovulator

So, are we taking bets on tonight? Straight up stood up? Handcuffed to the bed and robbed? Jason Perva shows up?

 

[Iseecovidpeople]

Not gonna lie, super excited to see how this plays out. There is nothing I enjoy more than tragedy heading his way that he documents.
He went radio silent for the catfish episode and that was no bueno for entertainment.

 

[Wernology]

Not gonna lie, super excited to see how this plays out. There is nothing I enjoy more than tragedy heading his way that he documents.
He went radio silent for the catfish episode and that was no bueno for entertainment.

I'm really hoping he uses it to fuel some angry rants, he's already apparently getting paid to do one "callout", maybe he'll just continue raging once he's all worked up, because there's no fucking way some 24 year old is going to show up at that fleabag of a motel to roll around on a food stained bed with tubby the no dick incel.

 

[holeinthedark]

"Oh, potential blood stains on the pillows with grease and mrsa pus all over the sheets. He smells like he died 6 months ago in an open field and theres shit and piss all over the walls. How are the sores on his dick BIGGER than his ACTUAL dick wtf is life" -- the zoomer bae probably.

 

[NattyDaddy]

So, are we taking bets on tonight? Straight up stood up? Handcuffed to the bed and robbed? Jason Perva shows up?

I'll put my Wern bucks on stood the fuck up, no ones coming for his worthless phone.

 

[ClownBrew]

I'm not a huge fan of disturbing lolcows, but I'll make an exception here. Lucas is abusing taxpayers' money and he should be held accountable for that.

Good luck, fren. The system dgaf. They'll deny countless working-class people who legitimately need it to survive, only to shower those gibs onto all the Lucas Colby Werners to be found all over America in every Motel 6 room, meth lab, crackhouse, or undeserved Section 8 fartbox.

Slam a tophat on my head if you will, but this bullshit is what makes the "Reeee taxation is theft!!1!" types tick. I feel their pain in this case. Rant off.

 

[WonderWino]

LOL Perva, Dan, Isaac, and Chris Hansen show up to the motel instead of a zoomer ovulator

....and failing that, his parents show up and tell him its a surprise intervention to start taking meds properly or they'll go to court and force him to

Now that would lead to the mother of all meltdowns

 

[Wernology]

This one was too good to wait for the compilation later.
It'll still be in there, but it deserves seeing now.

 

[holeinthedark]

With the republican brother LOL

....and failing that, his parents show up and tell him its a surprise intervention to start taking meds properly or they'll go to court and force him to

Now that would lead to the mother of all meltdowns

 

[Gas Station Boner Pills]

 

[Free the Pedos]

He had to be told to thank the person who bought the bus ticket. It didn’t cross his mind to do that of his own volition.

This is how people get robbed and/or killed by random psychos on the internet. The lack of self preservation instincts in lucas is astounding. If anyone shows up at all it'll to do something to him. Lucas would be fortunate to get a beating and be found tied up in the bathroom in the morning after being robbed

I used to dismiss the speculation that Lucas is autistic because that gets lobbed at every lolcow, but stuff like this makes me take it more seriously. He's exhibiting exactly the deficits that behavioral therapists make up for in autistic children.* Autistic kids are excessively trusting, which often leads to them having things stolen, and as is widely known they don't intuitively get social niceties that other people internalize. (Though to be fair I think it's mostly entitlement in Lucas's case.)
*Which makes sense because he's a baby.

He's got his mommy's crazy eyes.

I don't think we should pick on her unless she's as pants-shittingly crazy as her son. I'm sure she enabled him, but I don't know if it would ever have been possible to overcome whatever is wrong with Lucas.

 

[WonderWino]

View attachment 1813428

....That would be so much more hilarious if bernie were president at the time

This one was too good to wait for the compilation later.
It'll still be in there, but it deserves seeing now.

Even by lucas standards that was an astoundingly stupid thing to say. He legitimately thinks people fucking with him are on his side. He clearly doesn't understand the concept of a long con

 

[Stafford Beer Bong]

The classic smug, arrogant ”I’m right, you’re wrong” Wern face.

 

[Krathnami]

This one was too good to wait for the compilation later.
It'll still be in there, but it deserves seeing now.

View attachment 1813419

I wish I could claim credit for being the reason Lucas can’t find his teenage breeding slave because I wish nothing but ill upon him, but he couldn’t find his child bride even before the farms took notice of him.

 

[LilBismyfriend]

There's so many people rooting for Lucas you guys.. we're finished

 

[Da Dude123]

God, I hope he is back on the streets tomorrow and no one pays for another nights stay at the Motel 6. His newest video is super arrogant. Fucking cow! He can stay at the bus station. Such an exceptional use of money to buy the shit bum food and shelter.