Make the worst video game movie ever

[President Joe Biden]

hire trannies to make it

 

[Hellbound Hellhound]

A live-action adaptation of Angry Birds, where the main cast are all plus-size actresses and the film has a decidedly feminist bent.

 

[Boris Blank's glass eye]

S.T.A.L.K.E.R. adapted to the USA, carrying a strong environmentalist (global warming/anti-nuclear) and anti-Trump message.
Strelok played by Brie Larson.

Sidorovich no longer a greasy slimebag merchant looking to turn a profit, but a sassy obese African-American Black Queen empowering her community and instilling a modern feminist "women can do everything better" attitude. Played by Oprah or Michelle Obama in a fatsuit.

 

[FluffyTehFennekin]

God can only know what a Danganronpa movie would look like.
All I would know is that would be live action, and Monokuma would be CGI.

 

[Thiletonomics]

God can only know what a Danganronpa movie would look like.
All I would know is that would be live action, and Monokuma would be CGI.

I wonder if they would make the murders and executions more graphic than in the games, for reasons like cheap shock value or something else.

 

[FluffyTehFennekin]

I wonder if they would make the murders and executions more graphic than in the games, for reasons like cheap shock value or something else.

I was thinking how they would cast the students. Since, you know, they’re Japanese.
God only knows what they’d do to Chihiro

 

[Imperial Citizen]

Grand Theft Auto, directed by Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer.

 

[FaramirG]

Bioshock Infinite

 

[Quantum Diabetes]

A Tetris movie, but it's just two hours of a 90s gamer playing it on his bed occasionally changing the aa batteries or getting another plate of nuggies.
The movie ends when Mom makes him take out the trash.

 

[Tootsie Bear]

The Legend of Zelda with Brie Larson as Zelda. Brie Larson portrays a headstrong warrior princess who rebels against her father, the King. Despite the Princess of Hyrule and the heir apparent of a backwards kingdom that would rather see Zelda's younger brother, the Prince, succeed her because of tradition and toxic masculinity. Link will be portrayed as the Hero at first but will become skeptical of the King's motivation when he encounters Ganon who tells Link that he's only rebelling against Hyrule because of his people's plight, the amazonian Gerudos.

Zelda, who privately help democratic socialist views, joins Ganon and Link in going to war with the Kingdom with support of the the other races who were presented as lower by the native Hylians, which they eventually achieve victory and usher in a new era of peace where there would be no kingdom or borders, and everyone will be equal.

The Trifoce and legends commonly associated with the franchise will barley have any screen time and the fans of the movie wouldn't care because they never have played the games.

 

[tehpope]

A literal interpretation of Half Life. But done as a speedrun. It wouldn't be awful, but really fucking boring considering the medium.

Tetris but written by Adam Sandler and directed by Michael Bay.

The guy who was responsible for Food Fight did announce a while ago he was working on a Tetris Trilogy. Not sure if that went anywhere, considering how long Food Fight took to come out.

 

[Inflatable Julay]

Fire Emblem as gay porn

 

[OvercookedBacon]

>King of Fighters
>the KOF tournament is held in a faux-Matrix-dimension-thing
>Mai Shiranui and Iori Yagami are a couple
>Iori is an outgoing, millionaire playboy
>Saisyu Kusanagi is a sickly mute who dies, like, ten minutes after he's introduced
>Kyo Kusanagi is white in spite of Saisyu being Japanese
>Vice and Mature are brainwashed servants of Rugal
>Vice and Mature engage in regular three ways with Rugal
>Terry Bogard is a middle aged CIA agent
>Mature has characters on speed dial that were introduced years after she died in canon
>probably a bunch of other inaccurate stuff
> ... OH WAIT.

(edited because fuck)

 

[Wojak Moment]

Postal Movie where Postal Dude tries to massacre paradise but eventually learns to accept and love humanity, also has some bullshit love plot that goes nowhere

 

[Lmove]

Steins;Gate written by 'The Big Bang Theory' writers.
Bonus points if they're supervised by someone like Anita Sarkeesian for the minority report.

 

[Gentleman Gamer]

A fish out of water CGI/Live action Donkey Kong movie where he goes to the big city and some goofy shit happens with some Minions styled humor. He won't talk either just grunts. I guess it would be more similar to the Rabbidz then.

Either that or make it a PG-13 adult oriented comedy with the DK from the TV series, where he talks and makes innuendos and shit.

 

[Thiletonomics]

A fish out of water CGI/Live action Donkey Kong movie where he goes to the big city and some goofy shit happens with some Minions styled humor. He won't talk either just grunts. I guess it would be more similar to the Rabbidz then.

Either that or make it a PG-13 adult oriented comedy with the DK from the TV series, where he talks and makes innuendos and shit.

Would they also make references to the Expand Dong meme? Or would having that make the movie better?

 

[Dysnomia]

Pokemon with Justin RPG doing all the music. The plot naturally revolves around him being married to Reshiram and wanting to become Moltres' poop. I'll add a sexy Goodra that turns out to be male just to piss off the Goodra autists and ruin their fap sessions.

 

[Hooligan Handgun]

A CGI movie based on the Shantae games, but her personality is based on Cristina Vee’s Twitter account.

 

[Fünter]