Metal Elitists

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Accel_Rider said:
Have any of you guys heard of this band called Babymetal? I don't know, I just find it somewhat amusing how much ire can a bunch of Japanese girls trying to sing metal attracts.
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I've meet a few weebs who defend it. I just say "whatever bro, they don't even write their own music"
Then I hitch a ride on Quetzalcoatl while 5 headed blood angels play a metal cover of hocus pocus.
 
Accel_Rider said:
Have any of you guys heard of this band called Babymetal? I don't know, I just find it somewhat amusing how much ire can a bunch of Japanese girls trying to sing metal attracts.
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My favorite part of Baby Metal is everyone thinks they're gonna piss you off when they show it to you. Like they're the first person who showed you this bullshit. My second favorite part of baby metal is they couldnt make it more obvious these 3 girls don't give a fuck about metal.
 
Lipitor said:
My favorite part of Baby Metal is everyone thinks they're gonna piss you off when they show it to you. Like they're the first person who showed you this bullshit. My second favorite part of baby metal is they couldnt make it more obvious these 3 girls don't give a fuck about metal.
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My favorite part about Babymetal is how nobody thinks that Japan's had any other metal bands. And if they do, they must sound exactly like Babymetal.



 
The Colonel said:
There's also Dir en Grey
https://youtube.com/watch?v=TVBradbc-dY
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Sigh is some pretty good J-metal too.


Okay, here's another fun tale I remembered.

Maryland Deathfest is the East Coast's premier extreme metal festival, and every year for the entirety of Memorial Day weekend the city of Baltimore finds itself overrun with metalheads, heshers, hipsters, and crust punks with hygiene habits that would make ADF look like Mr Clean. I've been going for the past five years and have had a blast every time. If you can afford tickets, hotel prices, and travel fare and like the bands on the lineup, make the trek out sometime. You won't regret it.

The fest proper doesn't start until Thursday, but there's usually some kind of an informal pre-party on Wednesday. I was getting drunk with my pals in our hotel room and getting up to our usual shenanigans. And while one of us was out for a beer run, he came back with none other in tow but the members of the Finnish black metal band Horna. Sweet. I love those guys.

So my boys and I get fucking stupid whenever we're drunk -- I'm talking unironically fist-pumping to 80s hair metal stupid -- and every Deathfest has us shouting out a different dumb slogan at the top of our lungs. That year one of us had mentioned how if heavy metal was a school district's bus system, the short bus would be crammed full of Pantera fans. Cue one of us screaming "PAAAYYYYNNNN-TURRRRRRRR-UUUHHHHHH!!!" in an exaggerated redneck accent at maximum volume whenever the mood struck.

We did this in front of Horna, and it wasn't the best idea. Their lead singer glowered at us from behind his can of PBR and growled in the heaviest Finnish accent I've ever heard:

"You do NOT disrespect Pantera."

The entire band then left in a huff.

When we saw them open their set that Saturday, that same lead singer lifted up his black evil priest robes, pissed in his hand, and then gave his face a piss-baptism before launching into the lyrics. This actually happened, and I have the video evidence to prove it.


Heavy metal is serious business.
 
Oglooger said:
I actually want to hear more of this.
I never really found metal elitist, just guys who also like metal and we sould chill.
I think @Olhelm can tell us a tale or two.
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It is done.

Now, without naming names, I used to visit a now-defunct Metal forum, because babby Olhelm had just discovered Hammerfall, and was autistically into metal at that time. I had no idea that metal had so many sub-genres, and kinda just thought it was about shredding and child sacrifice.

Anyway, on this forum, there was this user named something like "KickTheDrool". He was one of the first members of the forum, and by far one of the most devoted. If otakus buy dakimakuras and superchristians buy Jesus dolls, then KickTheDrool bought to-scale demon statues.

He was an absolute nut. He made absolutely sure everything he posted was a quote from some death metal song, and would constantly blast the stuff in the chat (we had a liveplay kinda thing. Only admins could use it, which he happened to be). If anyone complained, they would be banned. If anyone said that they didn't like death metal in particular, they would be banned. His reasoning was always "insubordination". Other admins couldn't touch him, because only the founder had those kinds of rights, and Drool was his bestie.

Now, I was mostly quiet on the forum, because I lurked to find new stuff. Drool noticed that I had been a member for about 3(4?) months, and asked me why I hadn't posted anything. I told him I preferred to just read through, and he exploded at me in the chat. Something like:

"I CANT BELIEVE
YOU HEATHEN
YOU DON'T BELIEVE
YOU DON'T CONTRIBUTE
LEAVE THIS PLACE
FOREVERRRRRRRRR"

And I did. After, of course, Drool posted an image of himself. Dude was legitimately the fattest metalhead I had ever seen. Dreadlocks do not go with five chins. Eughghh.
 
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Idk guys Caves was pretty great

Shitty jokes aside, the only people I know that are snobby about metal are neckbeards online. These are the same people that argue about the tone of a particular open D string . Those guys suck. All in all, the metal fandom has been great and not full of speds for me.
 
Metalheads are literally the only group of people on the internet who are collectively more autistic than bronies.
 
Oh man I hate metal elitists so much. I've never had any in-person encounters (thank God) but there are plenty of them online. You don't have to look hard at all.

When Wayne Static died last year, a bunch of edgelords went on about how he "didn't even play metal" and was an obnoxious poser who no TROO METAWLHEHD would miss. I think it's safe to say that this attitude applies to other dead metal musicians as well.

I steer clear of the comments section whenever I listen to a song that falls under the metal genre. There's always that one guy stirring up shit about how X is a disgrace and their music makes his ears bleed.
 
MrTroll said:
Metalheads are literally the only group of people on the internet who are collectively more autistic than bronies.
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Are you sure you'd say that in a world with Steven Universe?

R.A.E.L. said:
Oh man I hate metal elitists so much. I've never had any in-person encounters (thank God) but there are plenty of them online. You don't have to look hard at all.

When Wayne Static died last year, a bunch of edgelords went on about how he "didn't even play metal" and was an obnoxious poser who no TROO METAWLHEHD would miss. I think it's safe to say that this attitude applies to other dead metal musicians as well.

I steer clear of the comments section whenever I listen to a song that falls under the metal genre. There's always that one guy stirring up shit about how X is a disgrace and their music makes his ears bleed.
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Internet metalheads get off on being as exclusionary as possible. Heavy metal's answer to Wikipedia, the Encyclopedia Metallum, is notorious for this. A lot of the world's best grindcore bands like Converge and Insect Warfare have no place there, because "grindcore owes more to punk than real metal." A band like Meshuggah only got a page recently because "djent" isn't "real metal" either. Just about any band somewhat close to metal that ended up on the charts in the last ten years (Killswitch Engage, Avenged Sevenfold, etc) doesn't count as "real metal," purely because people liked them enough for them to end up on the radio. But some black metal dude's neofolk side project that doesn't even have a single guitar on it? Sure, no problem!
 
VLAD said:
Internet metalheads get off on being as exclusionary as possible.
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That is, when they're not constantly shifting around the boundaries.
When you see videos where Alice in Chains is labelled as "not metal but still good" and Cannibal Corpse labelled as "shit metal but still metal", why bother?
You've already admitted that your own side can be as bad as the one you oppose, and the complete opposite as well, which really defeats the purpose of your videos to begin with.
 
Android raptor said:
This thread is TRUE KVLT

BTW anyone else think Varg Vikernes is kind of a lolcow?
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I was just gonna post about Varg, ha. I think he's definitely a lolcow and I actually talked to him on Youtube a bit (:powerlevel::powerlevel::powerlevel:). He told me his kids know that he killed Euronymous and he's raising them to follow his neo-nazi beliefs :|

Anyways, I love y'all for this thread. Metal elitists are the epitome of pseudo-intellectual, they think they know everything about music while trashing every other genre. It's ridiculous. and im just over here with my obscure subgenre that died in the 90's ha
 
vodka said:
I was just gonna post about Varg, ha. I think he's definitely a lolcow and I actually talked to him on Youtube a bit (:powerlevel::powerlevel::powerlevel:). He told me his kids know that he killed Euronymous and he's raising them to follow his neo-nazi beliefs :|

Anyways, I love y'all for this thread. Metal elitists are the epitome of pseudo-intellectual, they think they know everything about music while trashing every other genre. It's ridiculous. and im just over here with my obscure subgenre that died in the 90's ha
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I hope that Varg's kids don't turn out half as shitty as he is.

I found this from 2010. What a pretentious edge-lord.

http://www.burzum.org/eng/library/2010_interview_metalscript.shtml

...More on-topic, I was browsing iTunes and I noticed that Nickelback was categorized as "metal". Now imagine the look on an elitist's face :story:
 
Here's a good example about black metal elitism , a "hate campaign" was organized
against the band Ravenstorm because they were getting too popular and appeared on
Finnish national television at the time :

http://web.archive.org/web/19980501162336/http://personal.sip.fi/~storm/Crush/reason.html

Fun fact , many of the bands listed at the bottom of the page don't actually exist according to metal-archives.
And LOL , Children of Bodom is there.

A similar hatecampaign was organized against the band Blackthrone because they mixed black metal with punk
influences and humorous lyrics and the black metal mafia cannot approve that.

--
And Metal-archives forums themselves contain incredible spergery. For example ,
a thread about varieties/colors of guitar picks used in classic DM/BM and how they affect
the sound of classic recordings :

http://www.metal-archives.com/board/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=111591
 
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Piga Dgrifm said:
@x86x2

Anyway, people who think that their taste in music somehow puts them above everyone else are some of the most pretentious fucks I've ever come across.
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It seems most people start to really care about music in their mid-late teens. High school, and to a much lesser extent college, kids place a huge amount of their identity on liking the "right" bands and knowing everything about them. Similarly, that makes me feel like this kind of music snobbery is extremely juvenile. I don't care if you're a music professor in your 60s or a 30-year-old metal forum member... if you have time in your life to dress me down because I don't care who opened for what band in 1987, I'm filing you away with kids who aren't old enough to drive yet.
 
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