Michael J Hirtes - A tribute to one of Christine's biggest fans

[The Captain]

How does a deranged old fart like him can keep up with so many accounts?

When your only friends are the cockroaches feasting on your flesh you tend to have a lot of free time.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

Happy one year anniversary to Hirtes!

My head cannon still pronounces it as Hir-tees and that under that Fox mascot head is none other than @Cowlick no matter how much he denies it

 

[Tonberry]

P.S. It's also cool that you got @Super Collie for a cameo at the beginning.

That's one of the drawings Hirtes made back when he was involved with the "artistic" side of the furry community. That's where Collie got that profile picture from in the first place.

 

[Rupin]

I wish we could find a picture of the guy.

 

[Rupin]

I wish we could find a picture of the guy.

Does he live in Council Bluffs, IA?

 

[Rogowski]

100% likely he'll bring this up on a foxdick farms thread on /Cow/ and say how we're all pathetic gatekeepers of CWC.

What's astounding is that in any given Chris thread on /cow/ Hirtes is easily ¾ of all posts in said thread and his M.O. in those threads alternates between making up bold faced lies about Chris, claiming that anything bad that happens to Chris is "justice", and calling everyone who disagrees with him Josh

 

[Haesindang Park]

Geez Hirtes all we want to do is watch Chris do his thing and you're trying to ruin our fun.

 

[randomgirloninternet]

looks like chris himself is feeling a lot better than usual... especially when he blocked out an old fur harasser. cheers, mates.

 

[Ass eating cunt]

I guess Chris's autism is contagious, stay with the gal to long and you become just as laughable as them, good thing this site became less chriscentric overtime. And I'm still surprised that after all the years we've slowly began defending Chris in very slow amounts

 

[The Un-Clit]

Chris messaged me last night - within minutes our friend in "trollhalla" had an account made to harass Chris at Sheetz.

Chris sent me this screenshot and then reported ol' Dirty Hirtes all by himself!

Good job, Chris!

Be like Chris!

View attachment 507386

Chris: 1

Dirty Hirtes: 0

Chris is getting better and better at dealing with trolls in general, and Hirtes in particular. He delivered a couple of serious slapdown replies to a couple of Hirtes usual bullshit posts a couple weeks back too. Good to see.

I guess Chris's autism is contagious, stay with the gal to long and you become just as laughable as them, good thing this site became less chriscentric overtime.

Hirtes has been an infamous internet autist for YEARS before Chris ever made his first introductory video. The entire Furry/artist community shunned him ages ago for being an art-thief by refusing to pay for his orders, and just being a completely unlikable fuckstick.

 

[randomgirloninternet]

the site used to just make fun of chris... and it became more accepting of him despite the autistic boogaloo.

 

[Eryngium]

I used to think @Spelling Bee was just an attention whoreing faggot but you’re all right, don’t go to spergatory tommorow.

 

[The Captain]

Chris is getting better and better at dealing with trolls in general, and Hirtes in particular. He delivered a couple of serious slapdown replies to a couple of Hirtes usual bullshit posts a couple weeks back too. Good to see.

Null has a lot to do with that.. between Marvin, Null and I Chris has gotten significantly better at detecting and rejecting said advances.

He did lose his cool last night when he called me - he was a complete wreck because his van wouldn't start. I wish that instead of calling me first he would've called his insurance company, but at least we got to that point.

It was a learning experience for him, honestly. At 35 years old you can count the number of times he's ventured more than two hours away from Ruckersville on two hands. I can guarantee that the next time he goes somewhere and experiences a breakdown that he'll know exactly who to call, etc.

 

[Uncle Warren]

Man I wish I could do that kind of production work. Great vid.

 

[Jaiman]

My pic was used in the end. I feel special uwu

 

[MormonofID]

You’re implying the Grim Lumberjack won’t collect him in person.

"A man in a black robe appeared to the old furry, carrying an axe that said, 'Internet Lumberjack' on the handle. The man spoke in a Southern Accent and said,'Step away from that internet. I'mma cut you down. To Hell."

 

[HomeAloneTwo]

He's the Andy Dick of a-logs.

 

[randomgirloninternet]

what do you think this old man would do to that grim lumberjack?

 

[Exceptionally Exceptional]

It's sad how pathetic and small this man is.
Everyone else realized long ago that trying to prove that you're better than Chris shows that you're actually much worse.

You can be "better" than Chris by simply not being an utter sperg. Hirtes has failed even this lowest of requirements.

 

[Ruin]

Fun Hirtes trivia. If the dates are to be believed Hirtes was one of the first people to be banned from Fur Affinity.