Oldfag / Old Internet Sperging Thread - ILJ calls herself "anonymous," she is a hacker on steroids.

[Mullti Port RDRAM]

These last few pages bring me back.

 

[Dorito the Hedgehog]

A litmus text for oldfags made by a newfag. If you know anything below level 1 you probably have no life.

Spoiler

View attachment 2470592

This iceberg doesn't even have Bueno.

 

[Coelacanth]

Now that trolling has become established as a "subculture", the children of the rich can try their hand at it while being fully protected from the consequences that trolling used to entail.

I'm pretty sure this is why most people clung to Pool's Closed when 4chan started to become more well-known across the internet. It's probably the least dangerous trolling they ever did.

It's fake, you're right. There's no cred in being an actual oldfag. No one takes you seriously and everything is either bewilderingly alien or something you've seen a thousand times before. It's just depressing. Honestly browsing the net nowadays is getting more and more like everywhere at the end of time.

That's exactly how it feels. It's like being in a retirement home watching the world outside change nearly every single day and there's nothing you can do to understand or stop it.

 

[RadioactiveMonkeyMan]

It's not a pool, but I reckon it was probably still AIDS.

 

[The Lawgiver]

That's exactly how it feels. It's like being in a retirement home watching the world outside change nearly every single day and there's nothing you can do to understand or stop it.

The difference is you can actually fight back somewhat making the change you want to see online. Granted you're going against politically motivated corporations and complete fucking morons but when has that shit stopped people before? If actual pajeet scammers and spambots can get past the automated moderation and human checks then what's stopping shitposters?

 

[RVNX]

Fake oldfags want the street cred. Real oldfags are ambivalent about being oldfags because ultimately it just makes us losers who've wasted way too much of our lives reading message boards.

Hell, I wish 2006 was as far back as it went for me.

In the end, a lot of oldfags just grew up. I used to frequent 4chan every single day, every hour, tens of tabs open at all times between 2008 and 2011. Then I got a job and the interest dropped quickly. You kinda lost the connection to the community, every influx of summerfags changing the pace, and eventually every time you came back it wasn't what you wanted it to be anymore. Now I just look at /o/ and /vm/ once in a while.

Also, have my favorite swf

Mootykins.swf (loop, 4chan)

 

[Tylor Jones]

Somehow... they are still being made Clock animations.

Blah blah blah. The internets! Used to be! Blah blah blah.

Anti-Clock shit, Star Syndicate, Lock Crew, and Glock Crew. Even to this day, I am paranoid that my speakers will "randomly" get blown up. Everything is on low volume. There was so much shit on Newgrounds.

The first time. I went into NG, I was petrified because of the Pico flashes. My pubescent brain never recovered.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

If I had a dime for every time some 10 year old stumbles on a youtube upload of old newgrounds shit and comments about how "2011 InTeRnEt WaS wIlD!!1!".......

Edit: I just rewatched both Tiny Plaid Ninjas and I forgot the original flash uploads had hidden easter eggs you could click something in the vid for. You just can't do stuff like that with modern youtube...

 

[Teh]

 

[CharlesBarkley]

Imagine bragging about telnet setups or BBS boards or community projects like Infozone and thinking that saying you were on there makes you cool, hip or knowledgeable, lol.

"Yeah, little nigga. I'm a vet. Survived last measure and swap.avi. I'm cool and hip, lol. I remember phreaking in the hard ass streets of early detriot, little nigga." - Gay fag.

 

[(not) y2k compliant]

Imagine bragging about telnet setups or BBS boards or community projects like Infozone and thinking that saying you were on there makes you cool, hip or knowledgeable, lol.

Sounds like a whole lot of cope for not experiencing BBS door games :^)

 

[Caesare]

modern social media was Xanga and Livejournal you're part of what I would consider the lattermost years of ye olde internette.)

There were a lot of social media sites I was on as a youth that I can't even remember but they were pretty huge, this was 97-2001.

I think Spark.com was one. You could join groups and post pictures and stupid shit. The front page looked a lot like wikipedia does now, in that they have featured groups you could look at their pages and join if you were interested. I was on this one but didnt care for it much. Mostly used it to meet girls who I could talk into sending nude photos on AIM. Every day they had made up "holidays" that were supposed to be fun I guess, dumb shit like, "act like a pirate day". I guess it was supposed to be cute, idk.

Blackplanet was another social media/dating site for black people I was on. It was alright. I used it to meet girls, and see how many I could get to send nude photos on AIM.

Back in the mid 90s, if you looked up "nazi" on search engines of the day like yahoo, you would get gay porn chatrooms with headlines like "gay men who find men in nazi uniforms attractive".

In 97' I went to a site for the Knights of the Ku Klux Klan and I remember a part that said, "Why women should never date a nigger" This was still during the recent memory of OJ, and when you scrolled down they had the murder photo of Nicole Brown Simpson with her fucking head almost severed from her body. That left an impression, I'd say.

Howard Stern may be a Hollywood faggot now, but man in the 90s, he used let OJ and his supporters have it. It was pretty great. He was legendary until like 2011 I'd say. He'd make me laugh so hard I couldn't breath.

More people are online now so there is a larger quantity of faggotry on the internet now, but I dont think it was any better back then, in fact it was worse in a lot of ways. Since it was new, ppl werent really sure how to act, so you got a lot more liars and ppl trying to blow themselves up into something they werent since they figured no one would ever really find out they were full of shit.

I remember a friend of mine showing me PennyArcade for the first time, saying how funny it was but to me it was awful, one of the most awful webcomics I ever seen and thats hard to do since all webcomics are terrible.

I remember how happy I was when I found actual pictures of the PennyArcade dopes and showed that same friend. "Look how they draw themselves, now look who they are for real." Two of the ugliest, nerdiest mfers I've ever seen to this very day.

I remembered how lame ppl on the internet were back then when it was discovered like 3 or 4 years ago that fatass Boogie used to review pornographic movies and he'd talk like he was this ladies men who got lots of sex, even though everyone knew ladiesmen who get lots of sex dont have websites where they review porn movies, especially not in 2004 or whenever it was. Fake, bearded zilches do that, ppl exactly like Boogie.

It seemed like every male who had websites or blogs talked like that back then, just how Boogie "porn reviewer" did.

It was all very fake and phony.

I've never once been to 4chan or something awful, but reading the SA thread, it's one of my favorites on this site cuz it reminds me of all the phonies from old internet, with how they act and talk like theyre so smart and too cool for the room, then you inevitably see old pictures of the actual users saying these things that someone in the thread dug up, and they are offensively ugly and hard to look at. They're out of the ordinary how fucked up looking they are. You wont see people this horrible looking on the street on a daily basis, these are the shut-ins, the extraordinarily unfortunate looking. Just like Boogie, just like the 2 Penny Arcade guys.

I kinda was a fan of YTMND cuz it was just so silly. Every other short clip was, Indiana Jones running away from the boulder, Brian Peppers molesting someone, or the nigger from Punchout stealing somebodies stuff. I liked how every video had the same 9 or so "themes".

That's about all I remember from back then really. The earliest memory of the internet is my dad showing me stuff, before search engines, maybe 93 or 94, every site back then was something like: "Star Wars Trivia" or "Seinfeld sound bytes". lol

 

[Arctic]

It seemed like every male who had websites or blogs talked like that back then, just how Boogie "porn reviewer" did.

It was all very fake and phony.

Maddox was the epitome of this.

 

[Caesare]

Maddox was the epitome of this.

One of my little brother's friends had his book where he was trying to be all cutesy with the alphabet topics "A is for ___". It was so douchy.

While maddox is an ugly, bald kike, I wouldnt say he's quite on the level of hideous looking as Boogie, the two PennyArcade dorks, or any Something Awful user. His personality makes him just as awful though.

 

[Alex Krycek]

In the early 2000s my friends and I watched a lot of Animutations.

 

[The Lawgiver]

Imagine bragging about telnet setups or BBS boards or community projects like Infozone and thinking that saying you were on there makes you cool, hip or knowledgeable, lol.

"Yeah, little nigga. I'm a vet. Survived last measure and swap.avi. I'm cool and hip, lol. I remember phreaking in the hard ass streets of early detriot, little nigga." - Gay fag.

Saying you were in a place is never really anythng compared to actually embodying your own personal ideals no matter what place you're in. There's a lot of fake bastards out there that don't seem to get that and it's how we get edgelords like bella and moralfags ranting about how they were "indoctrinated into the alt right pipeline" or whatever the fuck dumb bullshit gets them popularity and asspats in the current year spectrum of modern internet shit.

In the early 2000s my friends and I watched a lot of Animutations.

Some of my earliest fond interent memories is just shit like this. I was one of those kids that managed to kinda sneak into online shit before the "minimum age requirement of 13" and with my shitty time perception it's kinda fucked things up when I realize how far back that stuff was and went "oh shit that was from the EARLY 2000s? FUCK!" It's insane how it's been almost 20 years since a lot of the more natural internet stuff went down but if me and my friends back then followed the rules entirely we would have probably ended up like a lot of the current reddit/twitter politics hivemind types. It also probably cost us any chance at a decent paying job but hey that's life lmao.

 

[AnOminous]

While maddox is an ugly, bald kike, I wouldnt say he's quite on the level of hideous looking as Boogie, the two PennyArcade dorks, or any Something Awful user. His personality makes him just as awful though.

Maddox is not a Jew. He is worse than a Jew. He is, may Allah forgive me for uttering such a word, an Armenian.

 

[Spooky Bones]

I didn't realize until I was looking at something on their website that Silent Circle was founded by Mike Janke and Phil Zimmerman. Zimmerman, if you weren't online in the 90s, was the author of Pretty Good Privacy (PGP) which was basically the first serious encryption program, especially to use public-key cryptography, that was accessible to normal people. You would put your public key on a server and get people to sign it after verifying your identity, and then you could sign and encrypt your emails. It was a fairly laborious process but it is actually probably significantly more secure than what people do now, with the sole exception of key length (I think the first version may have gone up to 2048 bit RSA keys, but most people used 1024 ... they didn't have a good idea of how fast the capacity to factor primes would evolve, and your 386 or whateve rwould be beating itself up trying to deal with them anyway.) Anyway PGP was released in 1992 and written in clean, easy-to-understand C, with source code included in the book that described it's use. As in printed out, for you newfags.

Why printed? Why not a floppy disk in the sleeve? Well, until around the turn of the 21st century, exporting cryptography from the U.S. was highly disapproved of by the glow-in-the-darks and could in fact land you in serious trouble. It turns out a book was considered free speech but any electronic media was considered a "device" under a law that was meant for ENIGMA machines and such. You could do some pretty serious time as the laws in question were meant to deal with international arms traffickers and foreign spies.

The glowies were super pissed off about this technology spreading to begin with and came close to getting Zimmerman after the PGP source code found it's way to some non-US FTP servers. He was under investigation by the FBI for more than three years, from 1993-1996, but was eventually cleared and went on to found a succession of companies named different variations of "PGP Inc," "PGP Corporation," etc.

I am sure it has been done already elsewhere but a deep dive may or may not reveal some serious glowies, but by 2012 Zimmerman founded Silent Circle with Mike after having been in pretty elevated corporate, consulting and academic circles for a while which is no doubt where he met the glowing ones.

 

[lolnah]

Somehow... they are still being made Clock animations.

Blah blah blah. The internets! Used to be! Blah blah blah.

Anti-Clock shit, Star Syndicate, Lock Crew, and Glock Crew. Even to this day, I am paranoid that my speakers will "randomly" get blown up. Everything is on low volume. There was so much shit on Newgrounds.

The first time. I went into NG, I was petrified because of the Pico flashes. My pubescent brain never recovered.

Holy fucking shit that takes me back. I was obsessed with NG back in the day, back when you could accrue points and do things like put a message on the main page. When the Clock Crew showed up it was so fucking annoying and I was busy IRL and it kinda chased me off the platform.

 

[Cheeseburger Picnic]