Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.

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ForeverAlonePonyfag said:
https://encyclopediadramatica.se/Superlisamcb Asspie girl who draws horrendously bright pink recolors of characters from various media that she calls "Niggis" and that totally don't look like Prickle and Goo from Gumby. Claims that she can actually see them with her third eye or something and "ZOMG I'm not a racist that's just what they're called".

Her deviantART http://niggithor.deviantart.com/
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niggi means natures intelligent graceful gorugoes innocence.
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What.

Legend of Zelda: Link Travels In The Niggi Castle Ages

We all know in the castle ages Niggies were quite the naughty buggers and still are today. In the castle ages Niggies were a bit too freely indulged in lets say, MATING. Now today Niggies are a lil more logical and know where to have thier private time, but back in the castle ages it was like a giant announcement that spread all over the society. Pink Niggi women were allowed to walk around the castle half nude, which today its called slutty but more tight then in the castle ages where it was like TOO MUCH. Today in some parts Dahlia its still happening, but aslong as we don't have to see it every day were ok and will deal with the fact. Anyway, human Link enters The Niggi Castle ages where he sees many Pink Niggi women walking around all Promiscuous, The brown Niggi women seem to hide. A pink Niggi lady spots Link and likes what she sees, he notices she has her eyes on him. "Hey baby" she says to Link, he looks at her and smiles. A grey Niggi man appeared beside her. "Hey you shall give her sweet love" he says to Link. He realizes the Niggies in the castle ages were quite how can we say HORNY. Link feels if he doesn't do so he'll get introuble noticing the Niggi guards by the gate. "You shall come here, so you and the Pink Niggi mistress shall mate" The grey Niggi guy leads him to. They lead in a room with some beds, Link feels very wierd and has no idea what to do. The grey niggi guy leaves the room, leaving it to just Link and some Pink Niggi mistress. The pink Niggi mistress looks at Link and says "Hump me" while giggling. A tanned Niggi guy comes in the room and sees Link. "She wants you to give her your sweet love" he says to Link. The tanned Niggi guy leaves the room, and Link kisses the Pink Niggi mistress. THEY MAKE SWEET LOVE!




THE END!
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What did I just read?
 
sparklemilhouse said:
Food Network's Sandra Lee. Just watch some of her on youtube.
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Sandra Lee? Do you mean the lady who made a meatloaf that ended up looking like a giant turd. The same woman who is known for also having cocktails or "russipies (recipies that vodka.)?
 
c-no said:
sparklemilhouse said:
Food Network's Sandra Lee. Just watch some of her on youtube.
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Sandra Lee? Do you mean the lady who made a meatloaf that ended up looking like a giant turd. The same woman who is known for also having cocktails or "russipies (recipies that vodka.)?
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If it's the same woman I'm thinking of, she showed how to turn boring store-bought angel food cakes into questionable holiday-related angel food cakes.
 
Sometimes I swear, the people with the crazy gender stuff and the 3 sets of neutral pronouns (isn't that a bit much? Wouldn't one suffice? Still sounds too weird to use, but at least it's just one and...oh, whatever) come up with all of this crazy convoluted, nonsensical, super confusing shit just to make people confused so they can then be offended by the IGNORANCE and INTOLERANCE of the confused person who has never even heard of this weird gender stuff.

...In short, I get the feeling they're making it as confusing as possible for the sole purpose of being able to get offended over it.
 
It's hilarious that people think being "offended" is the absolute worst thing that can happen to them.
 
Oh my god I forgot about two other freaks in my college -
1.Pony Dan.
He's this guy who went to my school. In school he was just a reject. You know, he didn't really have many friends, but people put up with him. He was a bit naive and a bit sensitive but whatever. My friend Jack once made him cry because he said "you are not related to King George V". He got in a lot of trouble for making him cry, but whatever.

In college he became a fucking MLP fan. He's the only "Brony" I know IRL (I know a couple 16 year old girls who watch it casually, but not actual Bronies)

He wears the same MLP t-shirt every day, some black thing with a pink pony on it. He tells everyone how much he loves this shirt because it came from America and it was $17.99. He wears this along with some cheapo sweatpants and a trilby. every. day.

He sits in the Atrium (college name for like... a common room I guess? Where everyone hangs out) with his laptop and speakers, very rudely blasting out episodes of MLP:FIM, loud enough to piss people off.

When he starts his PC up, one of the ponies runs across the windows start up screen.

He constantly forces this on random people, it's fucking weird. Pretty harmless but weird.

Anyway the other day he was sat next to me in an exam, and the series of events stuck with me cuz it was so fucking stupid.

The invigilators asked "does anybody need any equipment for their exam?"
He put his hand up and said "yeah I need a protractor". He had a protractor. The invigilator said this to him and asked "did you mean compass?"
"No, protractor." he really quite aggressively replied.
The girl sat on the other side of him said, quite bemused "you've got a protractor." He just ignored her.
When the invigilator came over to give him a protractor he was like "what!? I asked for a protractor!" The invigilator just walked off.
All the way through the exam he was making weird fucking snorting noises and stuff, and the way he was sitting reminded me of Chris so much for some reason.
When he left the exam to collect his stuff, he pulled out a fucking pony toy out of his bag and fucking started talking to it.

Now I really try to avoid Pony Dan because he always fucking tries to talk to me for some unknown reason, but he does it in a really awkward way. Like he'll walk past me and then say hello once he's going through a door to leave the room. So I just hear random "hey Melchett!" 's all the time. I've learnt to not respond because if I do, he could run back in the room to spout nonsense at me.

He thinks he's some major influential member of society. This is because at the beginning of the year we had to elect a representative of our form to go to these bollocks college meetings. Ain't nobody got time for that, I believe the kids say, so we elected him to spare ourselves pain.

Oh my god that was an unwise decision. Every Thursday he moans on and on at us about bollocks we don't care about. Ooh the further education building is getting a microwave - I don't give a fuck, I don't even know where that building is. Ooh Pony Dans organised a protest in the town centre - I don't give a fuck, nobody's going to go, etc.

He gets the piss taken out of him occasionally, but people have just started plain ignoring him. This is because they know if they start making fun of him, he'll start talking to them all the time.

He once told us all that he had never masturbated.

He also once asked me (OUT OF THE BLUE) whether he should get a C-Card (an initiative to give out free condoms) because "you never know when you get lucky ;) "

I have to say to my embarrassment, at that point I made a very loud, shrill scream. It wasn't good, in a room full of people.
2.Pedo Cameron/Pedobear
Pedo Cameron went to a nearby school when a lot of this went down so what I've heard is second-hand, but I've heard it from literally everyone in that school.

He's a very slight chap, ginger and gangly. He's a space invader too, which makes it more uncomfortable.
He made a few faux friends because his parents grow weed, and he could manage to nick an eight a week without them noticing.
This was until year 9, which is about the age of 14.
He had given his iPod to someone, and they had decided to take some pictures on it.
When they were browsing through looking at the photos, they came across a folder called "porn."
Can you guess what was in it?
He had mixed actual pictures of porn (i.e. off the internet) with pictures of every girl in his year. He had taken all of the pictures off of facebook. He'd even photoshopped a few of them.
Of course he got away scot-free. The girls were given an hour long lesson in "internet safety and stranger danger".
then 2 years passed and everyone was just about getting over it when he had a party.
He bought a lot of beer, and was handing it out.
He drank one can and tried to get with every girl there. Everyone was too drunk to notice that night but the days after everyone pieced their stories together.
He had been quite violent with one girl, breaking a locket necklace a dead relative had given her in an effort to feel her up.
Then after he realised he couldn't get with anyone he snuck into a girls tent when she was asleep.
At least he thought she was asleep, she wasn't and she hadn't been drinking (she didn't feel well so she retired to a tent early).
Basically put, and sorry for being crude, he started wanking behind her in a sleeping bag, with his other hand around her hip. She moved him twice.
After this all came out, everyone fucking hated him.
He gets shouted at a lot in the street.
Ive seen people throw packets of sweets at him saying "here's your bait for your next victim" and shit like that.
The bastard deserves it.

Now he's come to college he's not got any real friends. He still gets abuse, and we made sure this girl called Kirsten knew when Cameron was trying to get in with her (despite the fact she had a boyfriend at the time).

However, the fucker managed to find a girlfriend and shes totally and utterly unaware of it all. I've told ALL her friends in a desperate attempt for her to find out, but nobody wants to be the shit stirrer. She's very very childish, and looks a bit retarded. She had a fringe that literally looked like it was cut by a drunk man with Parkinson's and she talks like a 5 year old.

He's always like attached to her, it's sickening.

Turns out there's a lot of drama where I am... I really wish I was making Pedo Cameron up tho :|
 
Melchett said:
Oh my god I forgot about two other freaks in my college -
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I want to subscribe to you.

I knew some weirdos in high school, but pretty harmless stuff. This one midget kid had a habit of always materializing right behind me. I could be alone, then turn around and look down...

...and there he was.

Sometimes he'd announce his presence with "WHAT ARE YOU DOING" but sometimes he would just be really sneeeaky.

I never actually got his name, cttoi.
 
I often forget that these people aren't every day annoyances, but really quite exceptionally scary to the outside world.

The harmless ones are more heartwarming, I love them. There's this guy called Tom in college who just wanders around every day shaking hands with everyone and saying "hello, my name's Tom. Nice to meet you." I've shook his hand like 20 times since joining college :lol:.
 
Actually, my dad had one he referenced several years ago, and my mom laughed her ass off at being reminded.

"SAY HI TO FLOYD"

Apparently, this Floyd was a strange little individual who stood on street corners, wearing a sandwich sign that said "SAY HI TO FLOYD". He'd just wave at people.

And that's all I know about this mysterious person.
 
When my parents moved us to a university town in the middle of Pennsylvania so they could teach at a large, well-known land-grant university with a pedo assistant football coach... *cough*PennState*cough* they bought a house in a subdivision called Park Forest, which had the Park Forest Foot Fetishist. He was a middle-aged man, very clearly retarded, who would greet people, shake hands, introduce himself politely, and then, if you were a girl, he would kneel and inspect your feet on any pretext he could get. Maybe you had an untied shoelace, or maybe he wanted to look at your toenail polish. One time, when I was wearing sandals and had something wrong with my big toenail -- I can't remember, I think I'd stubbed the toe and the nail was coming loose -- he actually got quite agitated about it, and hoped desperately that it would be all better very, very soon.

My sister and I both moved away from that town after college, so I don't know what ever happened to the guy. He was obviously capable of independent living to the extent that he was allowed to roam town -- I actually bumped into him on campus once, so he must have been decently familiar with taking the bus. He asked my name then, although it was about the umpteenth time I'd met him, and then he got quite offended because my name is fairly common and he thought I was giving him a fake one. I did stop short of whipping out my ID to prove it.
 
sparklemilhouse said:
"Vendetta Moms" bug the hell out of me. You know the kind, they want the whole world to turn on their head just to appease the needs of their child.

I found a bunch if stories here:
http://www.autismwebsite.com/autismdisc ... ories.html

The lady at the hotel restaurant who let her autistic kid scream all through breakfast made my eyes roll out of my head.
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That Kaitlyn Baksedent girl sounds remarkabl similar to YuetheDragon.
 
I dunno. Maybe I read different stories, but in many of those cases, it was absolutely believable that -- just for example -- one dickweed teacher could ruin a special needs kid's whole school experience, or that school officials would refuse to enforce IEPs (Individualized Education Plans) that called for some kind of help with social skills training. It's hard enough to get through public schools in the US if you're quote-unquote "normal" and don't have any detectable disabilities. Trying to get through a school system when a kid has multiple issues (like the one where the program for the blind refused to take the kid because he had autism, and vice versa) must be an ungodly nightmare. It's hard to attract and keep good teachers when the person could make more money mucking out horse stalls, and still have to deal with less shit.
 
^ oh I know, a lot of those stories were not lolcow worthy, but some of the stores had some self righteous parents (like Borb) though.

>>He wears the same MLP t-shirt every day, some black thing with a pink pony on it. He tells everyone how much he loves this shirt because it came from America and it was $17.99. He wears this along with some cheapo sweatpants and a trilby. every. day.<<

I picture this dude looking exactly like A-log. I guess because A-Log seems to like hats too.

What is Pony Dan's major?
 
There is currently one particularly tempting person I'm aware of. Unfortunately I am part of the same community and wouldn't want to get caught up in a drama shit-storm.

Her wonderful traits include:

Absolute inability to handle any criticism.
Documented liar to the point where it borders on compulsive.
Extreme drama queen (uses overly dramatic terminology i.e. a person didn't give her constructive criticism they TORTURED her) much like OPL.
Is nearly 30 and still a virgin.
Looks like the arse end of a deformed donkey but refuses to date men who aren't going to provide her with "genetically superior" children.
Has been known to stalk and harass men to the point of threatening to travel to another country.
Despite being a pretty good artist is still known to cut corners and copy-paste or trace details/backgrounds.

And many, many other wonderful quirks...
 
There was this guy who I went to high school with. He was in my class. There was definitely something weird about him.

He tried to socialize with people, but it was really awkward; so he was constantly made fun of. I remember he always had one fixed conversation topic to each person he talked to! Like, he knew I watched The Simpsons (I wasn't a huge Simpsons fan, but we probably talked about it for some reason at some time, and he just latched on to it) so he'd ask me about The Simpsons every day. Every day, for years. "Hey dude, what's up? What about that Simpsons episode, uh?". And it's not like he was trying to find common ground for conversation, he'd just bring up the Simpsons and leave.

There was this friend of mine, we hung out in high school. He liked cars. The guy discovered my friend was into cars, so he started talking about cars with him. Every day. We eventually discovered it was like this for everyone in class, and started talking about it, even trying some armchair psychology of ours to find out wtf was up with him.

Today I figure it could be some kind of autism or something. Socially awkward + looking for patterns in stuff, etc. But he wasn't scary like some people you guys posted in here, just weird and kinda funny/creepy.
 
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