Personal Lolcows - Lolcows in your personal life.

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Not sure if this fits better here or in the Obscure Laughingstocks thread, but a personal lolcow of mine is Tsukinohoshi, aka Deviant-ZAngel (both accounts have since been deactivated).

Now, don't get me wrong -- she doesn't seem to be seriously messed up in the way some lolcows are, and whenever trolled she tends to delete her accounts, go into hiding for a while, and then open up a new one. She's not going to get super argumentative like, say, Natalie/Xiao. If anything, she's just a girl who can't take criticism and passes off even the slightest bit of it as hate -- pretty tame by lolcow standards.

But I find her entertaining in a way similar to Chris-chan (something others have noted as well): both have relatively poor art (though Tsukinohoshi has shown some sort of improvement, even if it's just a shift away from the face-eatingly huge animu eyes she used to draw); derivative ideas (except swiped from Sailor Moon rather than Sonic and Pokémon); cliché storytelling; and an insistence that her art needs no improvement whatsoever. Oh, she'll have attempts at actually getting critique, but doesn't implement it, or goes too extreme (i.e. someone once told her her faces were too round/blobbish, so she started reverting to exaggeratedly square faces). It's also really obvious when she goes back to edit pictures, as she used to do (to make it seem like she was taking advice), because the lines got jarringly thick and blobby in comparisons to the original.

The only thing I don't like is that she obviously must be monitoring her ED article, because every time a new update comes, revealing one of the new accounts she's made, that account is usually deactivated with no warning. Which is smarter than, say, Chris-chan, but makes it really hard to actually get samples of her newer artwork unless you're in the know/she doesn't know you're a troll. By the time I actually saw the latest ED update on July 10th, and went to look at the account, it was already deactivated, so I suppose it's just a matter of waiting for it to be updated again. The article is a decent summary even if the text is pretty tryhard sometimes.

But yeah, long story short I have a sort of odd fascination with her art and her inability to take critique, even if I don't think she really fits the criteria for a lolcow. Unfortunately she's made it harder for me to look at her current stuff, so she's doing something right.
 
I was just reminded of her earlier, but Chris Athey, the Sunny D & Rum girl. She makes Tomgirl Chris look like an attractive lady.
 
Man, oh man...There was this girl I went to high school with for a few years that was a hardcore sperg and if she had more of an internet presence, she could be a pretty epic lolcow. She was one of those scene chicks that tried way, way too hard to draw attention to herself by what she wore and how loudly she could scream her idiotic political opinions and OUTRAGEOUSLY EDGY jokes. If you asked her, she'd probably say she was "extroverted". To me and everybody else that observed her, "attention-whore" fit the bill far more accurately. She had no qualms with going on about anti vaccine conspiracies and other crazy bullshit in the middle of class (when teachers would allow for it, obviously) and typically if you had any interjection to what she was saying, her idea of trumping you was to scream over you, start bleating at you, call you names....I know, because I wound up on the receiving end of one of her idiotic little tirades once.

She got on my nerves, but after high school, I mostly forgot about her. I recently added a friend on facebook, though, that has this nimrod on her friends-list, and now she keeps showing up in that "suggested friends" sidebar. It's been over six years since I saw her last, and absolutely nothing about her has changed.

ABSOLUTELY.

FUCKING.

NOTHING.
 
Wow, brass-knuckle jewelry... that sucks me right back in time. Or I could just say "that sucks" and leave it at that....
 
Globe said:
Man, oh man...There was this girl I went to high school with for a few years that was a hardcore sperg and if she had more of an internet presence, she could be a pretty epic lolcow. She was one of those scene chicks that tried way, way too hard to draw attention to herself by what she wore and how loudly she could scream her idiotic political opinions and OUTRAGEOUSLY EDGY jokes. If you asked her, she'd probably say she was "extroverted". To me and everybody else that observed her, "attention-whore" fit the bill far more accurately. She had no qualms with going on about anti vaccine conspiracies and other crazy bullshit in the middle of class (when teachers would allow for it, obviously) and typically if you had any interjection to what she was saying, her idea of trumping you was to scream over you, start bleating at you, call you names....I know, because I wound up on the receiving end of one of her idiotic little tirades once.
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Ha. I know the type. I know this chick like her, she's only like 19, I was friends with her through college acquaintances but I ended up blocking her. Typical "I'M 19 AND DIFFERENT I HAVE PINK HAIR I DON'T PLAY BY YOUR RULES!" chick. Her tumblr is hilarious. She tries to give people sex advice. She's a teenager. She admitted "I've only ever had like 4 or 5 orgasms." Yeah, you're a right expert. In real life, she sounds like a Seth McFarlane character, of like a typical Family Guy girl-in-a-bar type. "Like OMG like THIS GUY totally was LIKE LOOKING at my BOOBS just because my SHIRT was down to my BELLY BUTTON like OMG YOU GUYS I was all like WHATEVER".
 
Well, don't know if this guy meets your standards of lolcow, but he meets mine.

WARNING: TL;DR AHEAD
I went to art school for college. No regrets about that, it was a very good school where I met a lot of good friends and colleagues and gained valuable experience. What I do regret, though, was making friends with this one guy. We will call him M.

M and I initially bonded over the fact that we both liked reviewers on ThatGuyWithTheGlasses. And that leads to the first quirk I noticed about him. While I like the videos on the site purely on an entertainment level, he seemed to regard them as a guide to life. And I don't mean in the "Oh, I was going through a rough time, but watching these funny videos helped me feel better" way; no, that would be understandable. No, he seemed to be under the impression that screaming about stuff you didn't like was normal, and not just an exaggerated reaction done for laughs. I suspect he had some anger issues already, though, so I might be overanalyzing. After all, I don't think any internet video justifies dealing with your frustration over a project and a professor by screaming "FUCKING BITCH!" in the middle of a very public lobby.

If he'd been decent at his craft (animation/motion graphics), maybe his less-than-stellar attitude to criticism could be ignored. But truth be told, he was a very, very mediocre artist at best. He put in the minimum amount of effort into his work, yet got mad at instructors who criticized it. He always complained about how the latest assignment was so hard, yet I never saw him working in the animation labs at late hours like the rest of us. I don't even think he worked outside of class. Hell, for one assignment, we had to film a shot, then attempt to recreate it with a greenscreened background. He simply took the original shot and changed some of the color settings so it kind of looked screened. Yet if you tried telling him something needed to be fixed, he would get all defensive and complain about how nobody could do it and how it was so impossible...

Of course, this laziness caught up to him. Near the end of junior year, we had an out-of-class Nuke exam. For those who don't know, Nuke is one of the most advanced compositing programs used in film and television post-production. For our exam, our instructor gave us a Nuke file with several projects on it that we had to alter in some way. And then, about four hours before the exam was due, the school's server refused to run Nuke. Everyone emailed our instructors, department head, and IT about it, and the exam was delayed until the problem could be fixed.

M, however, had a different reaction to finding out that Nuke wouldn't work: he went on the class's webshare (where we were supposed to turn our assignments in), copied someone else's file, and turned that one in. Bear in mind, this exam had been set up so that it was impossible to get the exact same results, so our instructor caught on pretty damn quickly. After a meeting where M initially denied cheating (until they actually asked him to reproduce his results), he was kicked out of the college, seeing as our school had a pretty damn strict "no plagiarism" policy. And then, about a year later, I make a Facebook post asking about an email our department head sent to us, and guess who shows up to bitch about the school? Yep, M. Because clearly it was the school's fault he was absolutely shit at his major.

Oh, also, he's a brony. I mean, I like the show myself, but he's definitely in the "creepy brony who keeps bringing the show up where it doesn't belong" category.

So, yeah, probably not as lolcow-y as your examples, but he's the closest thing I have to a personal lolcow.
 
sparklemilhouse said:
yeah, that's a lolcow.

Did he ever go back to school (to another college)?
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He went to another school in the same state. And from what I've heard, it's not a very good one, to say the least.
 
http://peterpanstatus.tumblr.com/post/57135453519

Tell me this girl isn't a train wreck lolcow. Every week she posts a new video about some horrible date because no guy wants to put up with her immensely overbearing personality. Notice how she goes from "He's so ugly and such a loser" to being mad that he doesn't want to put up with her shit. If you follow her on Tumblr, this happens ever fucking week.
 
soIregistered said:
http://peterpanstatus.tumblr.com/post/57135453519

Tell me this girl isn't a train wreck lolcow. Every week she posts a new video about some horrible date because no guy wants to put up with her immensely overbearing personality. Notice how she goes from "He's so ugly and such a loser" to being mad that he doesn't want to put up with her shit. If you follow her on Tumblr, this happens ever fucking week.
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Dead link.
 
Schadenfreude said:
soIregistered said:
http://peterpanstatus.tumblr.com/post/57135453519

Tell me this girl isn't a train wreck lolcow. Every week she posts a new video about some horrible date because no guy wants to put up with her immensely overbearing personality. Notice how she goes from "He's so ugly and such a loser" to being mad that he doesn't want to put up with her shit. If you follow her on Tumblr, this happens ever fucking week.
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Dead link.
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Must have finally made her tumblr private.

Actually I checked, she just changed URLs, but she deleted her vid. Oh well. It was lulzworthy.
 
I love listening to people who think Reddit is the fucking greatest website ever created and people who disagree with them are "ignorant to the modern world." I look at some reddits every now and then, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with forums (I'm here arnt I?), just don't spill that shit to IRL people. Turns out you 45 year old co-workers don't care about memes (no joke, I work with this guy)
 
Alan Pardew said:
I only browse Reddit just to browse Reddits about my favourite stuff.
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Same. There's a surprisingly useful subreddit for where I live, and a few decent ones about stuff I'm interested in, but the 'big' reddits just seem like a vortex of teenage know-it-alls and circlejerk hivemind up/downvoting.

Sadly there's no /r/sonichu or even /r/lolcows, but who needs them when we've got this place anyway. :heart-full:
 
Just remembered my boyfriends brother, whom I mentioned in a thread in Chris:

He's 26 and... Just not right. He lives hundreds of miles from us but he came down to visit and when I met him I was like "eh he's immature but whatever."

Then he started talking to me about hentai. I had known him for about an hour. When I say hentai I mean yaoui or whatever little boys on little boys is called.

He then went into, in quite some detail, about his sex life and how "women just aren't enough for him but Asian girls are hot".

He then got out his laptop and showed me his "cute Asians" folder, basically a wank bank.

He then made me play some shitty PS2 game with him that was really Japanese.

The entire time he's been spewing non sequiturs and quoting asdf, very loudly. And being really weird and like "WOW BRO I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE GETTING LAID!" Basically being really obnoxious.

Then I decided I didn't want to be around him any more cuz he was creepy and annoying so I was like "right we're going out." He followed us. He was down for a week and he was within 5 feet of us at all times. He slept in the same room at night too.

My boyfriend nearly punched him out because how annoying he is. You could tell their parents had to put up with a lot of this when his brother lived there, as their dad was in the room like "stop it. Now." The second it got close to violence. Their dads ex navy and terrifying :lol:

I've since seen more of him, and he doesn't get any better. His handwriting is that of a very small child, not even in double figures. He goes to "knighthood role plays" whatever the fuck they are. He took loads of pictres of it and sent them to us, and it's just fat nerds with wooden swords. He has a sonic/Pokemon crossover called Tailix. My boyfriend always gets 3 phone calls a day from him.
 
I would like to say that guidos (and by extension, guidettes) are lolcow worthy. Just turn on MTV if you don't know what I'm talking about. :tomgirl:
 
Lady Houligan said:
I've been debating whether or not I want to put this up, but here it is: the story of how one relatively normal friend evolved into my own pet lolcow.

We met through the 9 fandom (all twenty something that it seemed like there was of us online) and bonded quickly through RPing on AIM. We moved to Skype and onto other fandoms, and started having our whole group talk in the general chat while we RPed in private messages, and that's when she started talking more about herself and her life. Her mom was verbally and psychologically abusive. Her family was Southern Baptist and therefore very repressive, and had this weird fixation about people not moving further than a hundred miles away. After a year of knowing her she came out as a lesbian and her mom got more crazy. And bless my stupid little heart, I believed it all. So I wanted to help out.

So about this time last year, we encouraged her to move out and to the state I live in, which is fourteen hours away from her family. She raised the money through her Tumblr followers and drove out here with her cats. And within a year, she's managed to get to her fifth job (quit one retail, and then through the temp agency she signed up with she was fired once for poor performance, screwed out of two contracts, and then finally got hired full-time on the fourth contract that I helped her get), and she's pissed off her roommate with her shitty cleaning habits to the point where as of today she has a week to clean up the room she occupies or she'll be kicked out of the house. She still is begging for money on her Tumblr to afford her rent because she won't set a budget for herself, and won't take responsibility for her actions or faults or make herself actually do adult things like take out the trash, do the dishes, or actually do the pictures she's commissioned to do.

It's also worth noting that she's 31.
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Now that much, MUCH more has happened, I feel as though I should expand upon my tale. I also feel it's worth mentioning that her roommate is one of my best friends.
So she completely failed to get the room cleaned up at all: instead, she just moved things around to hide various instances of cat puke that was so dried into the carpet that she couldn't get it out. She broke the belt on the vacuum cleaner, she left an entire kitty litter container full of used litter and cat shits with a stack of empty ones, and she left a ton of garbage in the room. All the while she was supposed to be cleaning, she was fucking around on Tumblr posting pictures like thisand this. (Sidenote: that's supposed to be her "madame of a brothel" original character for a band fandom.) So consequently, she was kicked out of the house. Rather than go "well shit I guess I should have handled that differently", she instead called up her parents and brother, had her dad, brother and nephew drive up 14 hours, packed up her crap, and left her roommate with a mess to clean up. All the while she was harassing me to forgive her for talking shit about my friend behind her back. I'm a fiercely loyal person, so I've told her to shove off, more so when I saw what a pigsty she left her room in. So now she's back in Ohio, and still owes over $1k to my friend, but is trying to pretend it never happened. She even changed her cell phone number to try and avoid it. It's just one giant train wreck, and I'm so close to putting her up on ED for this and many more things.

sparklemilhouse said:

This girl. I'm nearly as big as her, but I wear spanx to smooth things down so I don't have this huge apron over every outfit I wear. Also her attitude is terrible. Paranoia, and she keyed people's cars because they were parked in front of her moms house. Her mom hates her too. To the point where she hides food from her.
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Oh my God... this girl is just... wow. I have no words.
 
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Why is her mother hiding food? Does she eat everything and leave her none or is this some form of strange punishment?
 
Melchett said:
Just remembered my boyfriends brother, whom I mentioned in a thread in Chris:

He's 26 and... Just not right. He lives hundreds of miles from us but he came down to visit and when I met him I was like "eh he's immature but whatever."

Then he started talking to me about hentai. I had known him for about an hour. When I say hentai I mean yaoui or whatever little boys on little boys is called.

He then went into, in quite some detail, about his sex life and how "women just aren't enough for him but Asian girls are hot".

He then got out his laptop and showed me his "cute Asians" folder, basically a wank bank.

He then made me play some shitty PS2 game with him that was really Japanese.

The entire time he's been spewing non sequiturs and quoting asdf, very loudly. And being really weird and like "WOW BRO I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU'RE GETTING LAID!" Basically being really obnoxious.

Then I decided I didn't want to be around him any more cuz he was creepy and annoying so I was like "right we're going out." He followed us. He was down for a week and he was within 5 feet of us at all times. He slept in the same room at night too.

My boyfriend nearly punched him out because how annoying he is. You could tell their parents had to put up with a lot of this when his brother lived there, as their dad was in the room like "stop it. Now." The second it got close to violence. Their dads ex navy and terrifying :lol:

I've since seen more of him, and he doesn't get any better. His handwriting is that of a very small child, not even in double figures. He goes to "knighthood role plays" whatever the fuck they are. He took loads of pictres of it and sent them to us, and it's just fat nerds with wooden swords. He has a sonic/Pokemon crossover called Tailix. My boyfriend always gets 3 phone calls a day from him.
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Woa are you sure you didn't make the wrong choice between the two brothers? This guy sounds like he has sooo much to offer. :lol:

"whatever little boys on little boys is called"

EWWW, you mean Shota? I'm all for erotic comics, but that's were it gets super fuckin creepy. btw, don't Google Shota. Yaoi depicts older teens or adults, (a sub genre. Bara, depicts hairy muscle men.) But Shota, is for pedoforks. Japan is waaaay to relaxed about pedophilia, in my opinion.
 
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