Polyamory General - Polyamory drama from Facebook, Reddit, and more

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yawning sneasel said:
So here is an example from one of my favorite personal lolcows. It is Natalie Fortune. This idiot should have a thread here tbh, but he knows how to lock his fuckery down so unless you have accounts watching him on websites, eh, you won't be finding stuff on him.

Anyhow, here he is with some of his friends. What you notice is that he is essentially teaching trannies how to groom other trannies on how to be polytards like him.
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Another thing you notice is that whenever there is a tranny talking, there's a fuckton of responses. Cisdudes? none. lol totally not a fetish.

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Or when they are responding they get beat up on passive aggressively for being cis.

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Essentially, what you find over time is that trannies are just autogynephiles who want to live out what they see in tranny porn. No shame in that, do what you want, but the scramble to stay on the high horse is funny.
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This is exactly why I'm so critical of ~polyamory~. Notice the people saying "how do I make my partner accept polyamory?" or "I was really reluctant to try polyamory, but my partner made me see the light!"

So many ~polyamorous~ relationships boil down to one partner deciding they want to fuck as many people as possible and then browbeating their partner into tolerating it. "If you don't let me fuck whoever I want whenever I want, Steve, we're finished. Also, monogamy is incredibly outdated and oppressive. Wanting to belong to just one person is something society brainwashes into us. Don't fall for it." They basically manipulate and emotionally abuse their partners into feeling bad about wanting a monogamous relationship.
 
I have a buddy who's a low-key swinger. He and his wife are sweethearts who just always seem relaxed and happy. My wife has a friend who is poly with her husband and they always seem to have some massively terrible drama and constantly talk shit about other people they fuck around with.

Then again, the swingers are in the early 40s, attractive and well to do, the polys are in their late 20s, aging really bad and are live in squalor
 
The thing about a monogamous relationship is that you're saying the person you're with is special. You want them to be happy. Maybe you're tempted to stray, but you don't, because this person means so much to you. If you're in a poly relationship, you're basically saying your partner is not special, there is no bond to them in particular. So of course poly relationships are a disaster area, they're built on a foundation of insecurity.

I've yet to see a non-monogamous relationship that wasn't just one partner who wanted out and the other desperate to salvage it by whatever means necessary.
Reynard said:
Isn't polyamory polygamy? Why make a new word? Because it sounds nicer? Whatever.
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I think technically "polygamy" means you're married to the other partners, whereas "polyamory" just means you're in a relationship. However, given that "monogamy" is popularly defined as "being in a relationship with one person at a time," I suppose you could argue that they do both mean the same thing.
 
Reynard said:
Isn't polyamory polygamy? Why make a new word? Because it sounds nicer? Whatever.
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Polygamy is when you have multiple married spouses, like 1 husband and 5 wives for example. Polyamory is being in relationships with multiple people but with none of the paperwork.
 
FierceBrosnan said:
Polygamy is when you have multiple married spouses, like 1 husband and 5 wives for example. Polyamory is being in relationships with multiple people but with none of the paperwork.
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Close enough, if you ask me. Sounds like these people simply don't want the paperwork or something. Or they simply don't expect it to last long.

Honestly, Are poly relationships gonna last any shorter than a regular one? Have you seen how fast those things go by? I'm gonna guess they might be even. Especially on Reddit.
 
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One of my former closest friends pulled this crap on her boyfriend. They'd been together for 10 years (since they were 16-17) and she had always claimed that she was bisexual, leaning more towards women, but that she loved her boyfriend so much that it didn't matter.

Then, two years ago or so, she started flirting with some girl in a different country online, and told her boyfriend she wanted to go poly. She also talked to me about it and asked what I thought, since we were close, and I told her my honest opinion that I don't think it can ever work, because at least one person involved will be miserable, even if they're pretending not to be. She basically stopped talking to me after that, but through mutual friends I know what went down later.

She said that she wanted a three-person relationship where they were all in a relationship with eachother, but then instantly got super jealous and refused to let her boyfriend or the new girl speak to eachother at all, and only wanted them to be around for her and not for eachother.

She said that communication is super important and that everyone needs to be open with their feelings, but then when the boyfriend was having emotional troubles entirely unrelated to the whole poly situation she basically told him to stop whining because it wasn't attractive.

Then after a few months she told the boyfriend that she'd realised she was actually lesbian and was leaving him for this new girl. He finally stood up for himself and told her that he felt pretty shitty that she'd basically baited him into sabotaging his own relationship, and she threw a complete fit.

About two or three months after that she'd broken up with this girl too, and was now having constant sex with some new guy (so much for lesbian), leaving opened condom wrappers in the kitchen and doing copious amounts of drugs while still being in the same apartment as her old boyfriend (he wasn't able to find a new place because of a housing crisis in my country).

The moral of this story is, if anyone ever tells you they want to go poly, tell them to go fuck themselves and get out of there right away.
 
An old hippie lady friend of mine once had the last word on polyamory and "open relationships": "They're great until that lonely, painful night when you really need your partner, and they're off fucking someone else."
 
Varg Did Nothing Wrong said:
But marriage is a lie made up by RELIGION and FASCIST SOCIETY

Polyamory is truly the ENLIGHTENED choice!
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Why do polys thing they are somehow being revolutionary? If you look at the bare bones of Abrahamic religions, they are all okay with polygamy. Polyamory worked with Neanderthals and early Homosapiens since there wouldn't be enough males to go around because they all kept dying from hunting or tribal wars and shit. It's the most primal form and it was the most conventional up until we learned that monogamy was best for creating civilizations.
 
PrincessJupiter said:
she basically told him to stop whining because it wasn't attractive.
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I find it hard to believe how often this phrase comes up in this thread. Like no shit emotional problems aren't attractive, they aren't meant to be, but when you're in a relationship you make commitments. If a partner needs you to be there for them, then go be there for them. Same deal vice versa although I'm guessing these kinds of selfish, hypocritical twats would complain if their piece of meat isn't there for them either.
 
PrincessJupiter said:
She said that communication is super important and that everyone needs to be open with their feelings, but then when the boyfriend was having emotional troubles entirely unrelated to the whole poly situation she basically told him to stop whining because it wasn't attractive.
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This type of thing is why I'm skeptical of the 'poly can work if [X]' line of thinking. If your communication and maturity are so advanced you can't care for yourself, isn't that just emotional immaturity?
 
Poly is weird but god damn "fluid bonded" is the most poetic way to say "dumped a load into/received a load from" this person.

On what level of self importance do you feel the need to share and advertise that information?
 
Reynard said:
Isn't polyamory polygamy? Why make a new word? Because it sounds nicer? Whatever.
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It's also different ends of the belief spectrum. Polygamy (1 man/multiple wives) is very patriarchal, and associated with highly conservative religious faiths (Fundie Mormons, Christians, and Muslims.) The focus is solely on the man, and him spreading his seed far and wide.

Polyamory (whatever the fuck combo) is more associated with those who consider themselves liberal, and claims a strong, feminist influence. The roots of it are in the sexual revolution, Neo-Paganism (Church of All Worlds/Wicca), and early feminism.

Then there is also polygyny (1 woman, many husbands), 0which is mostly practiced in areas of the world where fer land is scarce, so brothers will marry the same woman to preserve that. I think it's mostly in Nepal and areas near there.

I watch a lot of National Geographic and that show Taboo
 
PurpleSquirrel said:
Twenty years ago, a writer observed the birth of this sort of lolcow/geek "alternative sexuality," correctly identified the driving forces as social illiteracy and wanting to make up for lost high-school sexytimes, and named the participants, "Nerverts."
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Oh god, this reminds me of another awful internet subculture...Goreans. Basically, this guy John Norman wrote a series of books about the fictional world of Gor, where men enslave women and use them for freaky sex all the time. Goreans are fans of this who try to act like they live on Gor and act even stupider and have even more stupid nerd jargon than poly people. They insist it's not BDSM but it totally is. They are also all at least 250 pounds. Google it, it's fun!*

I hate how poly people believe that feelings and emotions are irrational and stupid. They're constantly trying to get over their feelings of jealousy, telling other people to get over their feelings of jealousy, trying to not feeling abandoned, telling people if you feel like you're being abandoned you're crazy, telling people to ignore their irrational partners, and on and on...


*no
 
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