Post the random.txt currently on your screen - 2nd edition

[Sabrina]

I just need to live for one more day and I can get this out then it doesnt matter
I should kill myself and frame Billy
that would be gold

 

[Troonologist PhD]

”I am a dangerous lunatic who should be monitored at all times for the safety of everyone around me.”

 

[Roast]

[eating an entire pizza]
”Are you a nutritionist!?”

 

[OvercookedBacon]

”So, I might have a girlfriend. She's 24. We met at psychiatric intake.”

 

[soft breathing]

”CORPSE THTERES A CORPSE ON MY DASH”

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

”I saw some art of a girl with a ridiculously huge horsecock that and I just positively adore it”

I hit the jackpot with that one, is there an easy way to see the source of the quotes?

 

[Troonologist PhD]

"Is it not true he's trying to monopolize on the lolcow scene?"

 

[Lightsaber Dildo]

”I have a real fleshlight I got free off Craigslist”

 

[Shiawase]

“You're a nigger! You're a fuckin' nigger.” Hangs up.
“Fuckin' nigger.”

 

[Rewire Tea]

(I love how all the random.txts today are stuff King Terry said).

 

[Overcast]

“We're living NOW! NOW, MAN!!“

Yes, yes we are.

 

[My Name is Ed]

Sharts himself on livestream.
[quietly] “Ah, shit.”

 

[Sabrina]

“Please don't ask how I'm doing. I'm literally farting out of my new vagina.”

 

[Soycast Guy]

”not using the proper pronouns should be illegal, actually. maybe you'd give a shit if it was.”

 

[ThicClaw]

"It's internet poetry, fuck off"

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole]

“You don't even know as an entrepreneur at 27 years old , what I had to endure to make this cat dream franchise come true.”
I am really curious about this one.

 

[Autistic Joe]

”the chungus porn was nice”

 

[Roast]

“10. According to the history chronicled on the actual webpage, the postings regarding Plaintiff were first posted on March 7, 2015 by a user with the username, 'Turbogook.'”

 

[Sabrina]

“And [the cops] told me to stop watching mlp”

 

[IAmNotAlpharius]

“What's reality? I don't know. When my bird was looking at my computer monitor I thought, "That bird has no idea what he's looking at." And yet what does the bird do? Does he panic? No, he can't really panic, he just does the best he can. Is he able to live in a world where he's so ignorant? Well, he doesn't really have a choice. The bird is okay even though he doesn't understand the world. You're that bird looking at the monitor, and you're thinking to yourself, I can figure this out. Maybe you have some bird ideas. Maybe that's the best you can do.”