Containment Random Chris Updates

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This is like Chris telling someone that works at McDonald's, "I love how you showed up on time to flip those burgers". All those emojis are getting creepy, it looks like he's now implying to his bald brethren, Jason Alexander, that he can give him the shocker in a friendly way.
 
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Fapcop said:
So basically: Chris is trans, because of his failures to be a successful male?
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It's also misandry. Chris really hates MALES, and by claiming he's female, he can finally separate himself completely from the gender he hates so much.

Chris' mind seems too small to comprehend that a man can still be male without meeting a narrow role defined by TV and people throwing pennies while claiming a cartoon hedgehog is dead.
 
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ToroidalBoat said:
It's also misandry. Chris really hates MALES, and by claiming he's female, he can finally separate himself completely from the gender he hates so much.

Chris' mind seems too small to comprehend that a man can still be male without meeting a narrow role defined by TV and people throwing pennies while claiming a cartoon hedgehog is dead.
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Yeah, the more Chris is determined to project his failures onto other men while separating himself from them......the more apparent it becomes that he is one of them. The terms "warrior", or "soldier of love" are great examples of Chris inability to understand anything about love or feminity. Sure, terms like that work on Sailor Moon, but in real life, the minute you start fighting for love and no one has actually kidnapped your wife and children, it ceases to make sense. The only thing Chris has done is fight with himself and others around him from the moment he could walk, which is an extremely masculine and unloving thing to do. If you have to push boundaries and fight for love, then it's not yours, which makes you a stalker.
 
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asperhes said:
So are we going to argue that Chris is trying to fuck Jason Alexander? Maybe there's something more to all this celebrity twittering.
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You know what they say, "marry a rich bald man and you can always see your face in his chrome dome, and his lego money in your pocket." It also applies to Chris, just without the rich part.
 
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Fapcop said:
So basically: Chris is trans, because of his failures to be a successful male? He basically retconned his life? I think that's definitely part of the explanation.
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It seems like a lot of former lolcows are turning tranny. Coppercab, that 'leave britney alone' guy, Chris, etc.
 
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Mariposa Electrique said:
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You gotta give Chris some credit here. He's a master of the sly complinsult. It may look like a compliment, it might sound like a compliment, but telling a celebrity that you really enjoyed what they did T W E N T Y years ago, gotta sting.

I can picture Jason Alexander reading that and going: "Ah, that was nice to he--hey hold on a second, what the hell did he mean with that?!? Fucking prick!"
 
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Fapcop said:
You gotta give Chris some credit here. He's a master of the sly complinsult. It may look like a compliment, it might sound like a compliment, but telling a celebrity that you really enjoyed what they did T W E N T Y years ago, gotta sting.

I can picture Jason Alexander reading that and going: "Ah, that was nice to he--hey hold on a second, what the hell did he mean with that?!? Fucking prick!"
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Too bad Chris isn't doing it intentionally and can only reference adult cartoons he does not understand and Seinfeld.
 
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Fapcop said:
You gotta give Chris some credit here. He's a master of the sly complinsult. It may look like a compliment, it might sound like a compliment, but telling a celebrity that you really enjoyed what they did T W E N T Y years ago, gotta sting.
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To be fair, what has Jason Alexander been in lately besides bit parts and voice over work?
 
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ToroidalBoat said:
Chris thinks he's a "warrior of love" because he "stands up to" the "big meanie trolls."

In reality, it's just him REEEing at people making fun of him for acting creepy, egotistical, and exceptional all the time.
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Yep. Chris has had numerous run-ins with authorities and angry reactions from women for 16 years now, almost all of which have stemmed from his china quest. Hanging around a retail store and all day with a "Play with my pee pee, if you qualify" sign seems totally normal for him, as does bombarding unwilling Twitter women with unwanted one-sided conversations and pet names.

This is because Chris is tacitly comfortable with his desperation. He has understood for quite some time that women don't even look his way, let alone run up to date him. He says he's too scared to ask, but he's also said that he's afraid of hearing 'no,' which could be the answer he expects to hear. In order to both avoid that and get him some sweet sweetheart action, Chris has come up with his numerous schemes that are meant to do away with the fear of rejection and get him exactly what he wants directly (they come to him). These are the result of truly anomalous thinking; of Chris being egotistical enough to think women can't resist him, but insecure enough to think failure is inevitable.

Thing is, it's all he's got.

Nothing - Nothing - Chris has tried to get women as worked. At all. His only success came in the form of a hooker, who has to please everybody as a requirement of the job. Absolutely no one has shown any romantic effort in Chris, which really stokes the fires of his frustration and desperation. So he goes and does his dumb little activities - like pretending to be a girl - and gets angry when someone shuts him down, because, again, he doesn't see any other avenue to finding his momsweet.
 
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He Sets Me On Fire said:
Nothing - Nothing - Chris has tried to get women as worked. At all. His only success came in the form of a hooker, who has to please everybody as a requirement of the job. Absolutely no one has shown any romantic effort in Chris, which really stokes the fires of his frustration and desperation. So he goes and does his dumb little activities - like pretending to be a girl - and gets angry when someone shuts him down, because, again, he doesn't see any other avenue to finding his momsweet.
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You know that hooker thing really worked out well for him! I'm surprised he hasn't made a regular routine out of it, it would certainly be cheaper than all the time and money he wastes on getting attention from women.

Then again, I have a feeling that the lovequest has always been 1/3 ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED! 1/3 Mommy-replacement and 1/3 asspats/validation search.
 
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