Containment Random Chris Updates

[the khat quaffer]

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Here's Chris wearing his "Fashions" well. Chris has never looked so bad or dressed so poorly.

Chris outfits are like going into the closet and pressing R3 on the controller and letting the computer randomize your outfit

 

[The Dude]

"B-B-But I have autism! You can't do that to an autistic, you JERKOP! It's MY house!"

What are the odds do you think he will say those words when they show up on his front door?

I doubt he will bring up his Autism or use "Jerkop", but I do imagine there will be lots of panicked stammering, cries of "No!", and things like that. Chris does not handle emotionally charged highly stressful situations well. See: "Hedgehog Defenseive Position". I don't imagine he will be very articulate or coherent when it happens. It might just overwhelm his little tard noodle and he might try to assault the deputies.

The one thing I almost feel sorry for Chris on is the fact that Barb completely fucked him over by putting 14BC on a reverse mortgage so she could buy more worthless Goodwill shit. By doing that she guaranteed her son will lose the house he grew up in and be homeless once the bank forecloses on it. Of course, instead of planning for his future and doing what he can to try to keep the house, Chris has instead done everything within his power to disregard the inevitable and has squandered every last available dollar on video games, kiddie toys, and pony shit. He's going to be really upset when he discovers he won't be able to bring it all in the van he'll be living in.

And Chris still wondered why he gets minimal acknowledgement to what little of intelligence he has when he's on early school back then before he ran off and cry in a classroom on his own during graduation day.

I don't remember him crying in a classroom. The way I recall it happening was he shuffled up to the podium, took his diploma without making eye contact or shaking hands with the principal, then bolted off the stage crying, either to his parents or out into the hall. Either way, it really made poor old Bob feel deeply embarrassed and ashamed of his son's childish behavior.

 

[Eugene90]

I doubt he will bring up his Autism or use "Jerkop", but I do imagine there will be lots of panicked stammering, cries of "No!", and things like that. Chris does not handle emotionally charged highly stressful situations well. See: "Hedgehog Defenseive Position". I don't imagine he will be very articulate or coherent when it happens. It might just overwhelm his little tard noodle and he might try to assault the deputies.

The one thing I almost feel sorry for Chris on is the fact that Barb completely fucked him over by putting 14BC on a reverse mortgage so she could buy more worthless Goodwill shit. By doing that she guaranteed her son will lose the house he grew up in and be homeless once the bank forecloses on it. Of course, instead of planning for his future and doing what he can to try to keep the house, Chris has instead done everything within his power to disregard the inevitable and has squandered every last available dollar on video games, kiddie toys, and pony shit. He's going to be really upset when he discovers he won't be able to bring it all in the van he'll be living in.



I don't remember him crying in a classroom. The way I recall it happening was he shuffled up to the podium, took his diploma without making eye contact or shaking hands with the principal, then bolted off the stage crying, either to his parents or out into the hall. Either way, it really made poor old Bob feel deeply embarrassed and ashamed of his son's childish behavior.

Frankly, knowing Chris' behavior and large sense of irresponsibility, he'll likely just abandon a massive amount of it, take whatever he deems most valuable (mostly just Sonichu toys and pony shit, as well as legos and consoles), and then live it off on the streets which will likely be impossible for him in long term without some serious street begging for money. Also I dunno how the folks treat the evicted there in his place, but I don't think many would want to even take him in, knowing his history.

I don't remember him crying in a classroom. The way I recall it happening was he shuffled up to the podium, took his diploma without making eye contact or shaking hands with the principal, then bolted off the stage crying, either to his parents or out into the hall. Either way, it really made poor old Bob feel deeply embarrassed and ashamed of his son's childish behavior.

I must've remembered it wrongly then. But it is an embarrassing moment for his father, to know that he's got such a troubled, dysfunctional son even from that time of the period.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

But it is an embarrassing moment for his father, to know that he's got such a troubled, dysfunctional son even from that time of the period.

It's weird that Bob never even corrected his behavior afterward. Yes, he did help Chris get into college, but Bob must've been puzzled by the fact that the professors, who are not high school teachers, had a hard time teaching Chris. And the fact that Chris was suspended for his attraction sign didn't raise any alarms with Bob. Unfortunately, Bob played along with Chris' Love Quest (see Christmas video), and after that, it was all downhill.

 

[Yamcha's Only Fan]

I don't remember him crying in a classroom. The way I recall it happening was he shuffled up to the podium, took his diploma without making eye contact or shaking hands with the principal, then bolted off the stage crying, either to his parents or out into the hall. Either way, it really made poor old Bob feel deeply embarrassed and ashamed of his son's childish behavior.

The only details I remember about chris in his early days is one of his gal pal babysitters Bob paid saying he got picked on quite a lot. Considering how childish chris was, it wouldn't shock me if he bawled in class but I admit we have no evidence.

It's weird that Bob never even corrected his behavior afterward. Yes, he did help Chris get into college, but Bob must've been puzzled by the fact that the professors, who are not high school teachers, had a hard time teaching Chris. And the fact that Chris was suspended for his attraction sign didn't raise any alarms with Bob. Unfortunately, Bob played along with Chris' Love Quest (see Christmas video), and after that, it was all downhill.

Bob likely never grasped that college professors aren't bound by "No child left behind" BS, and thus weren't obligated to hold his hand. But oh god, if chris had gone to college in current year...

 

[Eugene90]

It's weird that Bob never even corrected his behavior afterward. Unfortunately, Bob played along with Chris' Love Quest (see Christmas video), and after that, it was all downhill.

Bob is just out of touch with how things work since he was never really considered young even before Chris came to be.

Maybe he didn't see it as harmful but even if it was, his method was to simply coddle Chris and never tell him what or why his actions were wrong and just put him off from what hurts him without much explanation.

And really, the whole Love Quest thing should never have been enabled by Bob to be honest. If one of his family members enable him this stupidity, it'll only stick with him super long because Chris would be under the impression where even his family supports him this behavior thus he never feel like he's in the wrong.

And that's what made him stick with his beliefs despite the trouble he ran into with many people due to this Love Quest for a Boyfriend-Free Girl.

 

[Alex Krycek]

To answer why Chris uses European spellings for some things.

Like @The Dude said it makes him think he’s intelligent and he claims he’s descended from British Royalty. Bob was also a huge fan of English comedy though and would watch with Chris sometimes. Also Chris has been exposed to other English actors just because of the games he plays like Little Big Planet.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

Bob is just out of touch with how things work since he was never really considered young even before Chris came to be.

Maybe he didn't see it as harmful but even if it was, his method was to simply coddle Chris and never tell him what or why his actions were wrong and just put him off from what hurts him without much explanation.

And really, the whole Love Quest thing should never have been enabled by Bob to be honest. If one of his family members enable him this stupidity, it'll only stick with him super long because Chris would be under the impression where even his family supports him this behavior thus he never feel like he's in the wrong.

And that's what made him stick with his beliefs despite the trouble he ran into with many people due to this Love Quest for a Boyfriend-Free Girl.

You're right. Now that I think about it, Barb, in a one-time act of parenting, actually told Chris to stop with the attraction signs.

 

[The Dude]

Frankly, knowing Chris' behavior and large sense of irresponsibility, he'll likely just abandon a massive amount of it, take whatever he deems most valuable (mostly just Sonichu toys and pony shit, as well as legos and consoles), and then live it off on the streets which will likely be impossible for him in long term without some serious street begging for money. Also I dunno how the folks treat the evicted there in his place, but I don't think many would want to even take him in, knowing his history.



I must've remembered it wrongly then. But it is an embarrassing moment for his father, to know that he's got such a troubled, dysfunctional son even from that time of the period.

Chris lives in a mostly-red state. While Charlottesville is fairly Left-leaning these days, Chris lives out in a fairly rural area with hard-working white conservative neighbors. Most of those people aren't going to want to take in someone they'll see as a lazy, shiftless freeloader with bad hygiene. And that doesn't even factor in Chris being a tranny in Bible Country. Chris' siblings want nothing to do with him and his bullshit, and he has no close family. He has no close friends who would be willing to give him a place to live. So unless some major tard is willing to take him in for internet cred, Chris really has little hope of copping a couch to surf on or a room to lend.

 

[Eugene90]

Chris lives in a mostly-red state. While Charlottesville is fairly Left-leaning these days, Chris lives out in a fairly rural area with hard-working white conservative neighbors. Most of those people aren't going to want to take in someone they'll see as a lazy, shiftless freeloader with bad hygiene. And that doesn't even factor in Chris being a tranny in Bible Country. Chris' siblings want nothing to do with him and his bullshit, and he has no close family. He has no close friends who would be willing to give him a place to live. So unless some major tard is willing to take him in for internet cred, Chris really has little hope of copping a couch to surf on or a room to lend.

In that case, then Chris is very likely gonna fade away for good when Barb finally croaks from sickness of old.

But honestly, the only possible person I can imagine of ever wanting to take him in is Sockness, but from what I've seen so far it doesn't seem like Chris wants anything to do with that psychopath either so honestly, all it takes is just another gigantic moron to take him in out of naive pity/compassion or just want to score some internet points off Chris' notoriety, like you said.

 

[Alex Krycek]

Someone will take him in and I’m not just saying that as “oh yeah maybe this idiot will do it.” True story, in 2014 there was a guy in a Skype call that legit wanted to fucking live in 14 Branchland Court. All of us in the call said he was a dumbass. Everyone said he should stop talking. But he said if it wasn’t him, who would it be? Then he woke up the next day, polished off his hangover and said “yeah actually I wouldn’t want to live there.”

That was when Chris was inactive mostly. Imagine how it would be now where Chris is a tard and wants to play pretend all day and you have more than just one drunken idiot saying he would live there.

 

[Eugene90]

Someone will take him in and I’m not just saying that as “oh yeah maybe this idiot will do it.” True story, in 2014 there was a guy in a Skype call that legit wanted to fucking live in 14 Branchland Court. All of us in the call said he was a dumbass. Everyone said he should stop talking. But he said if it wasn’t him, who would it be? Then he woke up the next day, polished off his hangover and said “yeah actually I wouldn’t want to live there.”

That was when Chris was inactive mostly. Imagine how it would be now where Chris is a tard and wants to play pretend all day and you have more than just one drunken idiot saying he would live there.

If that happens, I'll simply say "And it couldn't have happened to anybody less deserving than this pig."

 

[A Grey Cat]

Wow there's so much to unpack with this latest batch of bs it's the perfect blend of new Chris with his merge whining, ego tripping and self pity, and old Chris with him coming off as thirsty, self absorbed, and an all around jerk... The irony forever lost on him. As @The Dude said, I wait on baited breath for the day Chris is told to vacate the house and when he refuses the sheriff's taser helps him "zap to the extreme," like he's always wanted.

 

[Cardboard Box Mountain]

Someone will take him in and I’m not just saying that as “oh yeah maybe this idiot will do it.” True story, in 2014 there was a guy in a Skype call that legit wanted to fucking live in 14 Branchland Court. All of us in the call said he was a dumbass. Everyone said he should stop talking. But he said if it wasn’t him, who would it be? Then he woke up the next day, polished off his hangover and said “yeah actually I wouldn’t want to live there.”

That was when Chris was inactive mostly. Imagine how it would be now where Chris is a tard and wants to play pretend all day and you have more than just one drunken idiot saying he would live there.

I can see it lasting as much as 48 hours in practice. Once the wien in question experiences the constant sperging, whining, singing, and babbling with a constant background of bing-bing-wahoo and notices how quickly their place gets eaten up with trash and grimy plastic toys, that person after two days without sleep is going to dump Chris and all his shit out in the yard and set the whole mess ablaze.

 

[Eugene90]

I can see it lasting as much as 48 hours in practice. Once the wien in question experiences the constant sperging, whining, singing, and babbling with a constant background of bing-bing-wahoo and notices how quickly their place gets eaten up with trash and grimy plastic toys, that person after two days without sleep is going to dump Chris and all his shit out in the yard and set the whole mess ablaze.

And then next do you think we'll see the legendary iconic Defensive Hedgehog kowtow before that person in a pitiful attempt to garner sympathy?

 

[Cardboard Box Mountain]

And then next do you think we'll see the legendary iconic Defensive Hedgehog kowtow before that person in a pitiful attempt to garner sympathy?

It might depend whether it's a one on one confrontation or the other person has friends present. I think Chris will curl up if he is outnumbered. If it's one on one I'd expect a great REEEEEEEEing culminating with a punch to the gob as the other person reacts to protect their eardrums.

 

[Eugene90]

It might depend whether it's a one on one confrontation or the other person has friends present. I think Chris will curl up if he is outnumbered. If it's one on one I'd expect a great REEEEEEEEing culminating with a punch to the gob as the other person reacts to protect their eardrums.

...if it's one on one, I would love to see another pepper spray incident.

"DON'T CALL ANYBODY!"

Followed by yet another police arrest.

 

[greninja]

I still think Barb is at fault.

 

[DeeCeeBees]

To answer why Chris uses European spellings for some things.

Like @The Dude said it makes him think he’s intelligent and he claims he’s descended from British Royalty. Bob was also a huge fan of English comedy though and would watch with Chris sometimes. Also Chris has been exposed to other English actors just because of the games he plays like Little Big Planet.

Chris is the autistic version of The Borg. Assimilating things he likes into his own fucked up little world.

 

[Mariposa Electrique]

Chris is the autistic version of The Borg. Assimilating things he likes into his own fucked up little world.

M, more like trapper keeper from south park.