random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Table Country]

If you upload a nazi all you get is a cyber nazi.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

There’s a file line between batshit and genius, as we all know.

 

[nekrataal]

No. I'm not gay.

And even if I were gay, no. I'm certain there's a face mask on the butthole as well as the mouth. There's nowhere to fuck.

You delusional delinquent dipshits don't see it because you're too busy concocting your congenitally stupid fantasies about Tom, but he's a respected figure in the hemp and the hippie art culture movement who has tens of thousands of fans all over the world.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

UwU *rapes you privately*

 

[Meat Target]

Well, let's not start sucking each other's dicks quite yet.

If you wanna go bully Bob I'll carpool. I'm mostly planning on putting a Mario amiibo holding a Twinkie slightly out of reach and reeling it in slowly with a fishing pole.

 

[Hitman One]

Can't wait to go on a rampage bashing all trannies right in the forehead.

 

[Meat Target]

So much butthurt it makes you want to donate to colon cancer research .

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

Alcohol, tobacco and firearms should be a camping trip not a government agency.

 

[Blackhole]

As I watch these spastics throw autistic tantrums, I look out my office window. I see flowers blooming on trees; I hear birds singing.

Do you ever get a sense that things are gonna be alright in the end?

And here we stand, at the junction of cope and hope, praying for the mercy of a billionaire African autist to save us from our current technocratic overlords and become our benevolent dictator, ushering in a few years of pure lulz and comeuppance.

In this moment, I am euphoric. Not because of any phony gender's blessings. But because, I am enlightened by my pink buttplug and matching cat ears.

it's baffling why he has pig tits

The best part is that all these retards are shitting themselves over nothing.

"My fear is he brings back Donald and we end up in a literal civil war."

 

[KiwiFuzz]

Oh so when the human woman saunters into the bears' house and eats their porridge and sleeps in their beds then it's "just right!", but as soon as the shoe is on the other foot everyone fucking loses their minds, huh? That's prejudice, my friend.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

A prerequisite for working at RT seems to be having an underlying personality disorder, mental trauma, or degenerate fetish.

If I was into guys I would be into him, he has good proportions.

 

[Table Country]

We would be too powerful if there were no hurdles to acquiring massive amounts of cocaine and firearms.

 

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

Nope nada njet nein いいえ!

Yar har, fiddle di dee,
Being a pirate is all right with me,
Watch all you want 'cause a torrent is free,
Come be a pirate!

Yo ho, ahoy and avast,
Shove your subscription fees right up yer ass!
Consooming for free and I'm having a blast!
I am a pirate!

NUTSACK SEAM

 

[SuperShibuyaFighter]

It's 2022 I should be in a flying car spewing J-bombs at some alpha centari refugee at the side of the space way.

 

[SCSI]

The only C++ sexual crimes that I've bare to witness is that when I run g++ in parallel the compilation jobs always end up fucking up my RAM because of template processing.

Trying to make like a cat in a litterbox isn’t going to save you, journoscum. The internet remembers everything.

You sound really mad for some reason. Do you use Twitter perhance?

 

[Friendly Primarina]

From this post:

[...]Sonic being that attached to the anointed symbol of organized institutional dominant elite feels like a hard symbolic clash with his "protect small animals from industry, scapegoated by the police and military" prior self.

 

[Pee Cola]

People certainly can change, however, pedos are not people.

Pedos who say they've stopped are just pedos who learned to shut up and hide things better.

 

[Sneeds]

”plese. plese unbann me. i will do anything, i will even have sex.”

 

[Zero Day Defense]

A US Marine needs to slap the crap out of this Jap so he shuts his trap.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

I wish I could extra-mega-cancel my already-canceled Netflix subscription and make them pay me a monthly fee.

Blockbuster died for this?

Technically it's actually a bisexual threesome/murder.

The majority of porn of Samus is in her suit, so it's actually not that much of a challenge.
Don't ask me how I know this.