random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[everybody in Portugal]

Also, notice that their skin colors are normal--white people, black people, American mystery meat people. None of them are "extras from Thriller"-colored.

 

[everybody in Portugal]

Fuck it up, Atlas!

Fuck. It. Up. Atlas.

Fuck it up, Atlas!

 

[JustSomeDong]

Since I too destroy cervixes I am rebranding myself as a waterslide.

 

[Gog & Magog]

It seems like there's no real reason to have human women offering handjobs to minotaurs at all, and they just do it because the minotaurs like it! I'm beginning to think this pharmaceutical company isn't behaving within the bounds of medical ethics...

She also manages to seduce the minotaur more effectively thanks to her knowledge of horoscopes.

Nowadays, telling the whole world about how there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be ravished by big monster dick is just a few feverish thumb-taps on smartphone keyboard away

 

[HONKY DESTROYER]

 

[6thRanger]

When a gay man wants to explore the universe, it is to masturbate to Scar from the Lion King on other planets.

 

[Dragged Into Sunlight]

The only acceptable interaction should be "hello Mr and Mrs Parent, this is Principal Hitman here at the Kiwi School for exceptional individuals. I'm just calling to let you know that your son has come to school dressed as a faggot and is demanding access to the girls' bathroom. Don't worry, we've called an ambulance so he can get his brain fixed in hospital."

 

[stupid frog]

"average adult main toy consumer" factoid actualy just statistical error. average adult buys 0 toys per year. Kevin Gibes, who lives on Tranch & buys over 10,000 toys each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

Look dude, I just want the right to write about how Kevin Gibes' amhole is malfunctioning. It's not that deep (literally).

 

[Shitted Scaredless]

I shouldn’t laugh at Hepatitis A, but fuck it, I’m going to laugh my ass off at Hepatitis A

 

[Aunt Carol]

Being a person is hard, all the time. For everyone.

 

[Dolomite]

Now this is no way to be an ally! It's like he made a giant micro aggression right to his throat.

 

[Counterfeit Obol]

• Indian Lover
• Indian
• Nigger
• Cuban congress-critter
• (admittedly don't know much about Youngkin)
• Nigger
• Nigger
• Woman
• Woman
• Woman
• A nobody named Cotton
• Kennedy's crazy ass

 

[skunt]

"WULULULU TITTIES SPITTIES SHITTY BALLS, HAIRY TITS gotta go guys alright" *ends stream*

 

[Faceless Whore]

Yes, they took something God created, the rainbow, and defaced it with the colors of poop and death. Like pottery.

 

[JelloJerk]

Based on MATI I thought it'd be cooler than this but it's literally just twitter with a few more slurs, as many queers and lamer topics.

 

[CHARizard]

And any male who doesn't want to fuck a 17 y/o is gay. We surely can all agree on that. If the number is lower we can start debating.

 

[Maniacal Foreigner]

I respect the honesty, but not the autism.

 

[FuckMeGentlyWithAChainsaw]

The joking matter of it all is that Florian's disease (of specific loss of speech function) matches the disease of a certain other enthusiast, who developed coprolaliac speech and called it Florian syndrome... and set fire to his psychiatrist office, several years ago. That was me.

Have you read my manifesto?

 

[Bill Kilgore]

Hitler was a communist, he moved the National Socialists because he came to believe that the communists were over run with Jews. He then moved on to the party that was the next closest thing to communist that also believed in racial purity.

Just goes to show even Chris can be right some times even if he doesn't understand why.

 

[Gentlebastard]

this is why your life is just beginning, friend. enjoy freedom.

"Everything was great so I decided to fuck around with it."
"Update - IT'S COMPLETELY RUINED HOW DID IT HAPPEN"

The duality of Taytay. Being too stupid to understand the question being asked. Whilst also being too much of a journo to answer what she thinks is being said disingenuously.

He's a bona fide bug man straight out of some /pol/ greentext. What a caricature of a real man.

You couldn't pay me to eat that shit, but a fat ass with a stroked-out body giving healthy food advice is hilarious.

All I want is liveblogging on this site during the election results. I want every single squeal injected directly into my veins.

This is like an obese person's obesity was diagnosed with obesity.

If I get a red-flavored Icee at the gas station, I don't expect it to taste like anything else besides red. It'd be cursed if it tasted like actual cherries.

that's what a diabetic, stroke patient needs: refined sugar

You'll never know the male experience of being towel snapped on the ass in a locker room.