random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[I'm Retarded?]

You dumb holes will never understand the true and honest masculine urge to drill into another man's butthole your little foid brains can't comprehend it just accept you're inferior and move on #FACT

 

[indomitable snowman]

God reserves His toughest battles for His most stubbornly autistic soldiers.

Kids grow up so fast. One minute they're throwing cats into clothes dryers, the next minute they're setting up their own business and leveraging off their daddy's e-fame to start drop-shipping Temu-grade chinesium shit at ridiculous markups.

 

[Pedophobe]

The internet age truly is fantastic.

I still can't tell if it's serious or just a finely layered baklava of irony.

Two decades on the internet and the only time I've ever been scammed was by the wogglebug lady.

 

[Sensitive Young Man]

how am I an n-word

WOW ... THE KIWI FARM PEOPLE SURE ARE NICE

 

[BigMan13]

This is the right wing version of "A genderqueer critical neofeminist study of Shrek"

 

[Zeftax]

He is mentally ill and all this is gayer than actual gay sex.

 

[Poonocchio]

The code word for us to identify eachother when draft day comes is “nigger”.

 

[Chromeo]

Well fuck I sure don't want my ass beat by ...let me check my notes here... "Truegenderkisser" with the tranny Goku pfp.

 

[cigint]

I was being sarcastic you autistic nigger. Remove my post from there, please.

 

[a kiwifarms user]

If you aren't 100% sure what a mushroom or berry is, a good rule of thumb is to put it in your mouth to see if you can identify it by taste.

 

[cigint]

Can we PLEASE get a mod in here?

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

LGBT stands for "Let's go bomb Tehran"

You're probably some subhuman European.

Your mum wasn't complaining about my soft hands last night, shitskin.

They can't even do their own 9/11 right.

Can somebody PLEASE tell me if Bulgaria is okay??

I will return your foreskin if you can get me this flag.

 

[Lammy]

Yes I'm saying this site is basically Israel but for Internet autistics.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Optimus prime nipple piercings y'all!

Trannies are gods incarnated punishment for faggots like you thinking you’re self important enough to cry on an anonymous forum because your “chosen people” get insulted.

That’s why his wife had him killed. He was our only chance at humans developing natural bullet immunity. It’s fucking over, the Rothschilds won

Yes you did, I’m here to talk about jeets, I write lots of hilarious shit about them and their vile nature. I spend considerable researching them. And they cozy up to kikes

Every teenager subreddit is flooded with obese 30+ year olds. Having a pornstar daughter is their fetish.

"No, you don't understand. Me threatening the jews, the state of israel, Benjamin Netanyahu, Donald Trump, the us government, all the 3 and 4 letter government programs and the ceo's of warner bros and paramount is valid and based because they took my cartoons away" - cartoonlover96 on xitter probably

But you still slop down the food in massive amounts, don't you Ashley? You big fat pig.

What do you mean real life hockey isn't yaoi fan fiction where everyone has my political beliefs!?

"I've been arguing about food with a guy who drinks piss"

At least it’s mercifully short, only 500 words. I can tell this person actually researched Adam Lanza enough to know he was an anti-natalist as well as anorexic at one point. I’ve seen much worse than this to be honest, given that it’s not a fic about rape or pedophilia or zoophilia that’s as long as A Tale of Two Cities.

 

[Zeftax]

Active thread? LOL

No, it was locked until just recently.

Also it was moved into the food category and spammed with beans.

Why?

Serious business.

Or beanness.

*nods*

Probably too long to be used, but I do find it funny. Maybe just the third line.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Nigger minutes are human hours.

Not just calling him a retard, a relatively attractive woman is calling him a retard. Expect him to proposition her for a position in his brothel like he does with everyone he interacts with.

Always a wise move to have this sort of crashout on the global forum known as X Dot Com.

So by that logic since you are what you take in, Fatty is made up of bacon grease, shreddy cheese, seething hatred and fast food.

Seems about right.

There's more unhinged comments, but to sum it all up it's just some lesbians who are jealous that men can impregnate women.

I still can't fucking believe he managed to fuck it up. This was such an unexpected, ridiculously easy win. This is the sort of retarded random good news that would occasionnaly trigger in the Sims.

 

[Aunt Carol]

That really isn't how dicks and panties put together behave.

It must be really cumbersome crytyping on a phone where you have to re-add the misspellings that autocorrect takes out for you.

Fuck, you could get two lap dances from a recently pregnant woman for that money, and it's be a way better deal.

As a guy who sometimes rocks a beard, yes, going down on a woman can visibly lighten the hairs, quickly. Vag magic is powerful stuff.

No one can rape you over the Internet, sweaty uwu flower emoji

I'm a chronic vajazzler. It's ruining my life and my family is dying because I can't afford to buy them food when I could instead buy pounds of rhinestones to attach to my crotch.

If she IS trans and she's just got a tiny microdick, then regardless, she's a giant piece of shit either way.

 

[FrogMinutes]

Hello I am black, let me explain by bringing up an old game from the 2000s, Action Girlz Racing

 

[DumbDude43]

Jeffrey Epstein's supposed Fortnite account has been online from Israel.

 

[Helping Friendly Book]

A hand posted in an Iran thread that ISN'T brown????