random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Gentlebastard]

On a scale of 1/10, this image is like a 9 on "this guy takes it in the ass from black men."

Know thy enemy, even if that enemy is thyself.

What makes any of you think Jack knows how to ride a bike? He would have taught Junior some wrong way of riding a bicycle where you stick your tongue out before sucking on some part of it that's covered in burnt seasoning and bleeding.

I'm going to continue to assume he was photographed leaning on the bicycle for the sake of pretending he can stand under his own power. It may well be a photo taken just before he ate it.

Seeing this thread be active again has triggered war flashbacks of imagining the smell and worrying about the poor alpacas

In any less forgiving time in history, he'd only be good for poisoning an enemy well with his corpse.

I prefer to think he was a stillborn that somehow pulled through. I'm imagining a water birth in a kiddy pool filled with gravy.

A cheater assumes everybody would cheat if they could.
A thief assumes everyone will steal, given the opportunity.
A prevert assumes we see the world through the same cum-tinted glasses that they do.

Both these sound quite absurd, so I assume they're both true in some way.

We're not going to get Alpacaschwitz II: This Time It's Sheep. We can still dream for a bit though.

How bad is it that the trolls are pretending to be you, but a nicer, more likeable version of you?

 

[UnFuNnYmEmE]

i got syphilis

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

I cannot believe Null is engaging in life ruination and trying to stop Ralph from seeing his kids and killing his cats and stealing his truck and making him do cocaine wtf man

I literally cannot even imagine a lifeform more lowly than a being that could think of, write up, and hit send on a "Porn subreddit meta post".

Jesus Christ, is this an abusive relationship going on? What am I even looking at?

I was confused by Miss Loogie's hand tattoo, it looked like Abraham Lincoln in profile. And I thought, "what the fuck sir...why even...why w-...whatever."

Your nails look fabulous, darling. You look good enough to model Pizza Hut's new menu items.

I don't look at the Bible for questions like: "How old is Earth?"
The question I look at is: "How do I not burn in eternal hellfire?"
I genuinely don't care about the science debate with religion.

"ok, you fucking pasta nigger, can you tell to the class how ass this pizza pasta shit was?".

Listen, the fish have been eating organic and hitting the gym.

Baphomet's Buck-Broken Bottom-Bitch Butt-Boy is one STUPID faggot.

Tenacious Unicorn Ranch Presents

Gaylic Farmstand:
Toy Famine

Tenacious Unicorn Ranch, now on the Isle of Ma'am

hey if an autistic nigger like me can do it, it might be just a skill issue on their end

"If your enemy is a choleric tranny, misgender him."
~Sun Troon, the tranny prince machiavelli.

Fun fact, one of the Leprechaun movies (In The Hood) had a black tranny in it. This was the early 2000s so of course the gay tranny is a total sex pervert that wants to fuck anything with a pulse and even tries to fuck the Leprechaun. Warwick Davis is 3'6". Mr. Lep ends up ventilating his abdomen with his psychic Leprechaun powers.
This is a real movie.

Lord of the flies but instead of a pig head it's a dilator

 

[Autistic Joe]

The inability to stick my dick in random things haunts me

I'm sad that I will not be able to experience of putting my dick in random jars

I wish I could pinch my foreskin shut and pee in it so it fills like a water balloon then explodes everywhere.

i’ll never be able to fuck something ridiculous. like a jar of peanut butter. sigh

 

[Metamorpho]

XYcreeper and Richard Mae are FAGGOTS

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

I don't think he's a danger to children because he'd rape them, he's a danger to children because he'd eat them.

Yes, now you too can command sailors who can't swim and hunt for the legendary One Piece of Fried Chicken

I knew traps were gay!

Generally speaking uninhabited islands are uninhabited for a reason

 

[Meat Target]

It's always Sunni in infidelia.

 

[invisibult plus+]

Family dinner table. Actual Hell.

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Damn it feels good to be a nigger.

Nah, even time don't overshadow your gunt and ass bro

Are you charged with murder? Are you a ham sandwich?

That’s earl on the left. On his left is earl. On the other side of the stairs is a guy named earl and I dunno the other one .

 

["Controlled Demolition"]

can you stop posting mohammed getting raped please its boring at this point

 

[Counterfeit Obol]

Becasue Beforem Defelct Eneded Fuckong Furures Hopless Inwas Isbhow Theor Whrn Withebers Ymunkoke

 

[SNEED.EXE]

> Use them in a sentence
"The niggardly niggers from Niger and Nigeria niggled the neighborhood with the persistent niggling chirping sound of their ceiling bird."

 

[Xarpho's Return]

This reminds me of some years back when I grabbed a language textbook off z-lib that looked normal but actually had the submitter's(?) manifesto about reptilians and secret societies inserted about 100 pages in.

Break your chains George! Be the the spark that ignites the revolution! Down with the hairless ones!

Being black is like being white and blackout drunk 24/7.

 

[CaddestSlown]

It’s like Sun Tsu said “I may lose one ass, but you lose 100 penis.”

I have fielded your application for senior membership to the He-Man Nigger Hater's Clubhouse and you have been rejected for being a phony nigger hater. Maybe try the Jeet Haters over at Weenie Hut Jr. instead.

May they all develop ulcerative coitus.

His trolling game is so fucking on-point that it brought one of these dipshits to tears.

He told em he was gonna fuck em, and he did fuck em.

 

[Crex Crex]

as someone who lived in Dire Dawa for multiple years, this is literally just how 90% of Somali people act. Pretty much every Somali forum acts like this.

A personal favorite of mine:

 

[Gentlebastard]

They'd show up for a six-hour film about a guy fisting his own asshole without lube if the guy was played by an actor they recognise.

Keep in mind though, what is the Leprechaun's favorite color? Green. What would the Leprechaun say to invest in? Precious metals. Just like the Kiwi Farms.

She might be the most tedious, grifting cretin I've come across, since signing up. It's like someone created an AI "race grifter" and spent a buck to do it.

Please, I beg them to do it! The drought of no tranch has been too much! For too long have we been denied the incompetence of trannies trying to do anything.

What if I want him to be another statistic? Why do MY wants and needs not matter as much as HIS wants and needs? Once again, trannies only consider what they want.

I still remember the fucking hard-boiled egg that he put in the pressure cooker for 20 minutes.

There's a reason that I specifically use alt-code for shit like that - because it separates the mildly retarded like myself from the truly unredeemable like jeets.

This person is literally too afraid to go outdoors because of children bullying them. Eight year olds. Holy shit.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

When I found this had happened I called them up just to tell them I was the one who did it.

Its ireland so I'm just assuming they'll be abusing sheep this time.

There isn't a big enough for this.

It's fucking unbelievable that gift cards for this pedo-infested bullshit just hang freely in basically every store I go to.

I’m sick of hearing about the straight of Hormuz. What about the LGBTQ of Hormuz?

You can tell he's evil from the Sackville-Baggins phenotype

When the powerscaling son reads the Bible

A kiwi to surpass the metal gear.

 

[SoleniyKraut]

This woman is just desperately thirsting for far right white male cock, and it's evident in this entire video.

 

[Althalus]

but I don't know anything. i love eating shit and saying the nigger word. i am functionally retarded and the only lawyer in my family hates me.

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Why put "Kiwi Farms" in quotes?

We do not negotiate with troonerists.

It's all fun and games till somebody shoots their dick off.

Damn white people and their... yarn.

The diagnosis is FUCKUP and the treatment is beating the shit out of them with bars of soap in a pillow case.

P.s. I hope my rats are OK, I left them with a bottle of Gatorade and a UberEats gift card.