random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Oh!]

I'm tired of hearing about public figures' penises

 

[Da Capo]

there was always someone posting degenerate shit like naked black men fucking watermelons.

 

[Dr. Butt]

"Brother Abdul this is the ninth anus you've expanded this month alone, maybe give somebody else a chance to practice?"

"Nah sorry man it's Allah's will"

 

[Solomon Bundy]

Let's create a generation of future citizens with zero attention span for anything that doesn't look like a digital slot machine.

FUCK.

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Muslims have the worst sexy talk

did she dye her armpits green because of islam?

You disgusting pervert! I will cover @WelperHelper99 body like a snake covering a giant NIGGER before eating it.

Onward, Chris-chan soldiers.

 

[a kiwifarms user]

I left with my dick dry and never looked back.

 

[Gog & Magog]

Gonna take a shit specifically so i can read this article, just wanted to share that.

Learn to admit you said something stupid and move on, its a lot more honorable to do that than to sit there pretending your pants aren't full of diarrhea and that anyone who tells you otherwise is actually the stupid one.

Apparently something like 30% of the site's activity take place in DMs? What are you people doing in there?

Genuinely more harmful than adding crack to the inner city. Dead by daylight ruined people.

Make a list with proof. Bring us their milk. If you know and do nothing you are also complicit and will be milked!

I refuse to cope and lie and pretend he didn't win. I will seethe, but I will not cope.

 

[Meat Target]

I would walk five hundred miles to get away from your dumb ass nonsense.

 

[Slideshow Bill]

That's really cool that you got a job as a professional racist

So, that aspect of the pink triangle doesn't bother me. The specific "off the meds" signal DEFINITELY doesn't bother me, EVERRRRRYONE should go off their meds. Newsflash: Jews control the medical industrial complex. Nothing they prescribe, ESPECIALLY psych meds, is ultimately good for you, and most of it just makes you sicker and deader. The cultists in Scientology do not hate psychiatrists enough. Every psychiatrist is just a subtler Mengele. Ergo, I would be UNIRONICALLY PROUD to wear a pink triangle patch in public for THAT reason.

 

[DickMain]

FACT: Anime is gay

 

[Tri-Tachyon'sClown]

Maybe because you're a low-IQ gorilla to whom subtlety is an undiscovered country.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I would prefer less overall instances of violent assrape in my country regardless of setting.

Glad to hear the Chinese have developed multidimensional beauty. God I want to fuck a tesseract (female). Pretty hard to get a bra to fit you in this 3d world if you've got four dimensional boobs. Keep trying new bras but they just phase through them on the higher dimensional plane.

hating the government is cool, but allowing kids to get raped to spite the government is retarded and autistic.

"Wow you're being rational and not a cum-brained slut? WHOA, BUDDDDDDDDDDY!"

Gay dudes get railed hard for decades and don’t lose control of their bowels.

Usually these retards just kill themselves. Way to hang in there!

OP is gay but I think it's understandable.

We are not stalker children, this is a gossip forum.

I'd like to acknowledge the Wurundjeri tribe, the traditional owners of this app on which we make credible death threats.

So Jack didn't *completely* incinerate the vegetables and butter; because he even half-asses destruction.

He lives in Seattle and calls lots of people his "wife."

Just simply say you love cats and it'd be fine, lots of us do!

 

[Gentlebastard]

That post is so spiteful and hateful and condescending and smug
I'd almost encourage it as a sort of motivational routine, like "read this thing in full once every day" just to fuel your own motivation for counteracting such people

You must be on crack. With a gun to the head no sane person should buy anything from his merch site.

You're not excited to see what new and funny ways a fat washed up manchild can burn money away?

Love this thread, gets my inner Rorschach out for a run.

 

[Dr. Butt]

"haha iphone vuvuzela 100 billion dead"

 

[RomanianSchizo]

"So, we're going to reinvent the phone."
- Steve Jobs in 2007

"Men are 'ballmaxxing' their testicles until they’re inflated to the size of grapefruits"
- a news headline almost 20 years later

Sir, this is a Wendy's.

Fat Nietzche kinda looks like GK Chesterton, coincidence? But that's just a theory, a gay theory.

Tfw when you're half-drunk and hungover with fiery Taco Bell shits and accidentally crack the First Edition Charizard to clean up the chalupa residue.

Pewdiepie, pulse of my person, passion of my pelvis. My sin, my soul. Pew-dee-pie: the lips spilling two pale pops of breath, parted by the tender tap of the tongue, an attendance upon the teeth. Pew. Dee. Pie.

He was Pewds, plain Pewds, in recording, standing legless in the corner window. He was Pewdie over broadband. He was Felix off camera. He was Kjellberg on the dotted line. But in my eyes he was always Pewdiepie.

Chud Dwyer!

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

I weep for humanity if this is our future but god damn it I can't help but laugh.

nah i'll just call you a faggot and move on. Faggot.

Mutts law in full effect you all disgust me

Now here we see the wignat in good form. I dont mean to totally denigrate them. Even as a fallen people, the wignat still possesses a kind of primitive nobility.

KIWIS, ya gotta stop chimping out. For fucks sake

 

[Black Man Underwear]

I would prefer not to rape old/dead men, but I would watch you do it.

I'm a banana ejaculating a nic cage who is also ejaculating

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Null's biological father is John Madden.

If this goddamn idiot is still alive somebody needs to go kill him.

 

[Bill Evans 45]

I am not a Chantal scholar, but one of my favorite bits was the MATI episode where Null drank vodka and watched her eat 3 huge platters of shrimp Alfredo while she told the story of how she shit herself through a thong after a failed threesome

 

[polyester]

Thank God that Jesus saved me from my Japanese entertainment addiction.