random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[KiwiFuzz]

In excruciating detail of their exact level of hottness, using numerical scales, very specific adjectives, using metaphors and similes and allusion, fuck maybe even alliteration...I don't think it would make any of their years. Not at all.

 

[Shitty User Stole a Good Name]

the classic striped potato headed manboy can stay.

 

[Pee Cola]

Fuckin hell, you guys are terrifying and I love it.

people shouldn't have pets if they want to hide from the farms

 

[Orange Rhymer]

Of all possible futures, we got the one where autistic genderfluid teenage communists are unironically defending, a profoundly retarded Sonic obsessed tranny who raped his own mother, from the normal people who believe the creature who forcibly penetrated it’s own mother with his male penis is a man and like 40% people take the arguements seriously.

please God, please send the meteors now.

 

[Meat Target]

My mind is still just totally blown. I want to process this. But I am back to seething and coping. I thought I was out of seethium and copium, but apparently I have new supplies.

 

[KiwiFuzz]

I gotchu fam.

 

[LurkTrawl]

Now, now, gents. No need to get all retarded about which fat fuck is a fat fuck.

To be fair, nigger is gender neutral.

 

[Special Agent Punchy]

“Either way its cool bc i anonymous”

—Isabella Loretta Janke, Incest Troll

 

[keyboredsm4shthe2nd]

Ah my favorite word, Frankfurt.

He has to be at the very least legally retarded, no?

Chris vanishes and becomes a serial rapist in a hedgehog costume methinks.

I'm picturing the investigating officers going home to their wives like, "Ask me how my day was."

"We're gay and we piss and shit all over the place"

Assholes were designed by God for shitting is the moral of the story here.

2nd is just first loser

If Chris causes a major SCOTUS decision, I'm taking it as a cosmic sign to kill myself

If people think raping your Alzheimer’s suffering 79 year old mother is acceptable, I’m ending it.

I just like the idea of Kiwi-Chan being a tangible mascot instead of a wet dream. It would also make the site seem friendlier

This whole site is a bit weird you coward, give me motherfucker emojis or give me death.

These people don't need to be "visible"-- they need to sit in a pew.

Aces are the dingleberry desperately clinging to the ass hairs of the collective alphabet gang.

 

[Rex Luna]

The Gunt is on!

 

[nekrataal]

Why travel to Seattle, when you have pussy on your sofa.

 

[Cowboy Cat]

I love this conversation about animal genitalia as much as the next guy

 

[Kill a Troon for Pikamee]

Efficient killings of Trannies = Good

autism isn't even fucking real. it's not a thing. it doesn't exist.

 

[Anne Hyroe]

T - Minus 5 Days until Sky Vagina...

 

[Fìddlesticks]

I can only imagine how frustrating it must be to try and achieve something in life, when anytime someone searches your name they are immediately bombarded with instances of your fat, autistic brother asking to ejaculate over some trans' pictures - though the father does also have a total gypsy criminal record that's widely available.

That last name essentially has the same connotations as HIV at this point.

if you call these people lolcows, than you should be called terroristcows.

Dating someone who will murder you online for a few Winner ratings sounds scary.

Sorry, I already have a Kiwi bf.

We failed.

Br*zil

the first thing I see is wannabe-gangster miscarriage selfies.

 

[Francesco Dellamorte]

>Geneva suggestions

 

[Useful_Mistake]

Alan Dershowitz is not a puppet of the US Government which is why the US government let me know personally.

 

[smee]

 

[Law]

Since learning about them and all their sketchy behavior I have been warning everyone in the polycules I know and some of my closest comrades and I have put them on community watch.

"Warn the polycules!" as some sort of lolcow version of "light the beacons of Gondor" had me rolling. I think polycule is such a funny word.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

Is putting ice in your pussy really comparable to not eating for a week?

Somehow the cartoonish, child-like style of an incest rape makes it much much worse. God watched you draw this.