random_text.txt

[Gentlebastard]

"The furry ERPers will be back, and in greater numbers."

Oh, so we're still going to push the false narrative that Kyle shot three darkies and not clarify that all three of them were honkies?

This late 20s fag practically oozes soy. He acts like his airport econolodge is five star accommodations like he's Borat. The $12 churro is greatest food he has ever eaten. The best part is when he makes cummies in his pants when he sees a Micky Mouse mascot. At Disneyland!

Fair point but the melodramatic redditor waxing poetic about his dick skin is funny

Add a mandatory class in school that shows people lolcows ruining their lives on social media similar to anti-drug programs.

Sorry, I no longer believe any good news. This must be fake and gay.

Bro I'm not gonna ass dox myself just take my word for it

It will never fail to amuse me when people who claim to be commies literally suck the shit out of the assholes of corporations while insisting anyone who doesn't is a "fascist."

>go for the yearly tartar removal
>get fucking euthanized
hate it when this happens

My cat was being a shithead the other day, so I put her in my room to cool her paws for a bit. As I dropped her on the bed, I told her to enjoy prison and didn't even think about it until after I'd closed the door.

 

[MetokurGroomedMe]

feral Changs are just as retarded as feral Tyrones.

 

[Nikes_JustDoIt]

 

[Fungible penis]

We're not here to argue whether these cats should be fed or euthanized. We are here to dox animal torturers and get them swiftly executed in China's mobile execution vans.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

SEND ME ALL OF THE METADATA FOR VIEWERSHIP ON YOUR WEBSITE. THERE IS NO BETTER TIME THAN NOW TO LEAK THAT SHIT AND IF YOU HAND IT TO ME YOU CAN DISMISS ME AS A RANDOM RAVING LUNATIC THAT IP BUYERS CAN SAFELY IGNORE.

I know that jannies usually do it for free, but I've never heard of jannies paid in cum.

I think you need to stop being a negative Nancy.

We didn't get most miserable? Well that's bloody brilliant, isn't it. Can't even win a misery competition. What a waste of time that was.

I tried to kill myself by putting a fork in the plug socket but the bobbies came round and confiscated my cutlery for not having the correct grade of silverware license. The disposable plastic cutlery isn't working.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

Admittedly, my dick is very not cis passing

 

[Aunt Carol]

well you already talk like a fag so you may as well go ahead and start gargling balls.

Wait are you genuinely arguing for the anime harem trope to replace the nuclear family?

 

[Coelacanth]

Ug! Me rape white children? Me get hands cut off back home for this, but me treated as hero here for rape

 

[Tablet County]

I learned something from this thread. Apparently eating Jewish arse is incredibly high in calories and makes you a massively fat fuck.

It's written in academic-speak. They've developed their own bizarre pidgin to avoid having to speak real English like the rest of us.

REAL FASCISTS
PUNCH NAZIS​

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

We are dealing with people who think that writing TRUMP on their own underwear in magic marker, and then shitting in them, makes Trump look bad for having his name smeared in shit, instead of they, who just voluntarily crapped in their pants.......

 

[Aunt Carol]

The winds of change continue to blow a favourable refreshing breeze through Null's feathered bangs.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

I can't believe people are actually answering OP's question.

As if Duolingo would be a bottom with the way it dominates your notifications commanding you to do your lessons. Duolingo bird is 100% a true and honest top.

I usually don't pay attention to this shit but the bird has a dog dick and it's pissing me off.

This guy doesn't even know what bird dick looks like. What a fag.

most birds don't have dicks, and I'm pretty sure none have scrotums
ducks have penises though, because they rape any birds that are vaguely duck-shaped.

I know these things from years of farming.

I guess I never really thought about birds having or not having penises before, but now I've gained this knowledge. Thanks. Thanks for that.

I distinctly remember as a child seeing an episode of dirty jobs where they covered men jerking off turkeys. How is that possible with bird dick?

Talked with a falconry/bird rehab specialist who trained them that his wide-brimmed hat was in fact what they (endangered birds they have for breeding) should fuck. So they'd get it on with his head and just scoop the results out of the brim.

That's the price of knowlege. Now make a willpower save to not loose sanity points.

Can we go back to talking about bird dicks? That was less terrifying.

 

[CansOfCant]

My day today started with a video where a guy was shitting on a diner plate and my day is ending with a video where a guy is eating bunny shit. Thanks Kiwi Farms.

 

[JoseRaulChupacabra]

Only reason I went there was to find out what people stuck up their butt.

 

[Tablet County]

What is it with Mormons and their love of Facebook? Did ol' Joe Smith write about it in Reformed Egyptian or something?

HOLY SHIT, A GUILLOTINE JUST FLEW OVER MY HOUSE!

SAM HYDE IS FLYING A GUILLOTINE TO HASAN PIKER'S HOUSE

make up a story about your windows PC dying. If they boast about their apple product they're gay. if they suggest a linux distro they're trans.

Gaddafi was a OG.

That man hired around 400 whores just to try and convert them to Islam.

I'm shocked the NHS managed to save this child's life and not decapitate it instead.

So, you guys really don't have botulism over there? Weird, I'll have to send over a load of duck shit to fix that.

 

[RACISM]

"Would be nice if you weren't able to hide behind the anonymity of the kiwifarms and I could just break your jaw to shut you up".

Classic "@Ed Weed".

 

[Blobby's Murder Knife]

The fact that Null hates to admit, is that Q&A is the backbone of this site. It is the lynchpin holding this whole operation together. Without it, the rest of the forum would surely fall into chaos and disarray. We are Kiwifarms. Every thread, every post, just serves to further reinforce that fact of explicit superiority that Q&A so firmly holds over the rest of the Farms.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

My suspension of disbelief can only go so far when I'm reading my Sonic fapfics.

 

[Useful_Mistake]

If we got the leaders of Israel and Palestine to start Patposting, there might actually be a ceasefire because they’d be too busy calling him a fat pig to bomb each other.

 

[Poonocchio]

Bryan "From the River to the Sea, all troon dicks shall be in me" Dunn