random_text.txt

[KiwiFuzz2]

A friend of mine did this thing where him and a buddy went to a grocery store with clipboard matching polo shirt just to see if they could just Dolly out a gumball machine they did and no one asked any questions
And then they had a gumball machine they had no keys for like 5 years

“Nooo, stalker child, it is YOU who must accept the website cookies”

The second amendment should be updated to the right to bareback cousins

I captured this before I saw it above and ordinarily I would delete but hot damn this is solid.

Every aspect of American society is so lazy and shitty and embarrassing

"Pleased to meet you,
Hope you guess my deadname"

>DO NOT INSERT ANTIQUITIES INTO YOUR RECTUM.

I mean who hasn't stuck an old plastic smurf up their shit pussy?
I'm not sure if I ever passed the happy one holding the lantern.

...Unless they badmouth the USS Liberty sinkers of course, then the entire establishment will try to silence them. Makes the sunburnt goyim think.

Don't fuck monkeys, okay?

 

[Pedophobe]

You're the best kind of Super Autist.

What do you mean the Internet is public? Don't I have some kind of right-to-privacy?

I just love seeing bad things happen to bad people.

 

[Spirelord: Downfall]

He doesn’t just want lolis to fuck horses, he wants to fuck baby horses.

 

[Judd]

Fucking racists keeping the Chinese fourballed cockrat out of the news.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

my god man, how feral were you?

i will donate only if you make a board for gay weeaboo shit and make me a mod

The kitchen is pretty warm most of the time.

The British are considered animals here.

Vtubers who court coomer fanbases always range from mid to ugly I swear
They must use the coomer attention to fill their lack of attention IRL

No fucking idea.

 

[Pedophobe]

It's amazing how much drama and mockery you can avoid by just not being a complete piece of shit.

And now, the Best of Easy:

when i posted this, they went bananas, they went apeshit, you could even say they.. chimped out.

He contacted every single animal rights group in Indonesia, and eventually hit the jackpot.

i want you all to think long and hard about these things. i know i sure enjoy thinking about these things.
i enjoy it very much.

 

[Spud]

I love going on rampages, killing innocents

 

[HyperboreanRightsActivist]

I’ve been pwned into silence

Why do you keep doing this to yourself?

What's the point in "internet fasting" when you still let random Internet men live rent free in your head?

I don't think eating ass is a very Christian activity

 

[Chongqing]

"Yeah daddy, stick it in my disabled pussy"

 

[Useful_Mistake]

I’d point my gun sideways at him and accidentally shoot the school kids on the other side of the street

Yo, lemme paint you da picture, aight? So, I'm strollin' through the block, mindin' my own bidness, when suddenly, I hear dis loud squeal. My eyes shoot up and I see dis big ol' pig-man lookin' like he just stepped outta some twisted fairytale. I ain't stickin' 'round for no bedtime stories, nah mean?

So, I holla back at dat pig-man, like, "Aw hell naw, craka, I ain't playin' witchu!" But dis pig ain't backin' down, no sir. He hits me back with some squealin' gibberish, talkin' 'bout I'm wrong or whatever. Next thing I know, dis dude starts rollin' down dat hill like a runaway train, except he's more bacon than metal.

Now, I ain't 'bout to be no bacon sandwich, so I gotta think fast. I dip, duck, dive, and dodge, dodgin' and weavin' like I'm in a street brawl. I find me a dumpster or a fire escape or somethin', anythin' to hide behind. Ain't no way I'm lettin' no pig-man steamroll me today, nah mean? So, I lay low until dat porker passes by, then I book it home like my life depends on it. Ain't no bedtime worth tanglin' with a pig on steroids, you feel me?

 

[Gentlebastard]

"I'm not disappointed you beat off to little girls getting fucked by horses, I'm disappointed you got caught" is a wild take nobody will love.

None of this is rooted in any sort of rational system of belief, it's just autists chasing the electronic equivalent of Pavlov's bell.

Just reading "_N_I_G_G_E_R hasn't broken our safety policies" somehow makes me feel nice.

Patrick will never fall flat on his face. His fall will always be broken by his big juicy bitchtits

We bought a Blåvingad whale instead, it's good for hugging when surfing the SRS-thread, because you can hide a bottle of booze in its mouth (it closes with a zipper). I recomend it to all fellow transphobes.

Why would he need to wear a fatsuit? He is already an obese catamite of gargantuan proportions.

his skull’s probably soft enough at present that you could drag a tortilla chip through it and come away with a scoop of whatever Dr. Dreadful shit his right eye has gelatinized into

Our lovable Khazar Pooner returns, with some great hot takes including how she pisses on people's things like a dog, and how her vagina steams. No, I am not joking about the last part.

if you were to plop Pat down in the middle of Lake Michigan, it would be possible to see him from Chicago, Mackinaw City, and also Vladivostok.

Everyoe knows if you actually want to an hero you have to cut down the street, not across the road

You've already been told many hundreds of thousands of times to not act like an adult taking constructive criticism in good sport, stalker.

Enjoy the thread-prison baby child.

I love the incredible realizations and interesting questions that this person brings up.

"Why would men want dick? Are they gay?"
"Why am I getting sexualized?" Said by the man dressed as a bimbo.

subskribe to my blog to have early access to my next entry "i just found out that lesbian women don't like dick!".

 

[BirdUp]

The ignore report: rough estimations

Of ~116 users I have on ignore, about two dozen of them are “hard ignore”: trolls I know by name and don’t want to hear from. Then we have the “soft ignores”, numbering perhaps 36-40. These are people I don’t really have a grudge against but they were being so autistic in one thread that I had to mute ‘em. The rest are those weens who think it matters if they go back through your postings and give every one a negative rating. I blocked you guys just because you were messing with me menchies with 20+ notifications you rated something “Mati”.

 

[Breadbear]

they unleashed a great and powerful autism, the likes of which have not been seen since the days of the dimensional merge.

 

[BIG BILL HELL'S]

I can score a near perfect 100 on an IQ test, but my personality tests all come back ***TILT***.

 

[BirdUp]

your dick is deformed af nigga
actually Kill youself you subhuman inside out nigger

 

[Jewthulhu]

• I'm not fat
• I'm probably not gay
• I haven't masturbated in over a week.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

Who the fuck considers it a human right for little kids to access gay porn?

Who the fuck thinks a crude drawing of a fakeboy having spicy straight sex is gay porn?

 

[Rotollo 2]

All Discord users should be institutionalised.

 

[UnsufficentBoobage]

Let us lock all the childfrees and whateverfems in a pit and throw pitbulls in for them to raise

superior mayonnaise is readily available.

 

[Return of the Freaker]

I'd rather have my incel son fuck a McRib than some ran-through hooker.

That is disgusting. Almost as disgusting as fucking somebody for a McRib.