Resident Evil - Virgin Vampire Wine Mom vs Chad Magnetic Lebowski

[Soi Woh Jak]

I don't know if this is just me being retarded but I want to go back to the isometric RE/Silent Hill. Even if combat didn't exactly work without autoaim, it felt good to play. The first person and third person ones feel a lot slower and sluggish compared to the older games. It felt like playing in a diorama instead of a live action horror movie which lends itself better to puzzle solving and exploration.

 

[Wesker]

All this shit-talking of Zero put me in the mood to replay it. So I did...

>The opening narration references the events of the first game, gun survivor, and code veronica. The narrator describes all three of these events as being 'seemingly unrelated', despite all of them involving zombies.

>Anime James Marcus appears 3 times in the first 20 minutes.

>I had Rebecca, a literal genius, repair a live electrical wire in the rain. On top of a speeding train. She was then accosted by leeches.

>There's a scene where a couple of Umbrella Security Service guys get attacked by leeches, their screams echoing into the stormy night as they fire their machine pistols in vain. Billy and Rebecca are standing next to a door, right outside where all of this takes place. Neither of them comment on this.

>Hook shot. 2 item slots.

Okay, I kneel. This game is dumb. Part of me still wants to like it though.

I really wanna like it too but it's just a fucking mess.

The Training Facility is just a shitty mansion clone.

All the monsters are mostly just big things of smaller things. Plague crawlers, the eliminators, the bat, the web spinners, the stinger and the centurion. All boring animals with minimal changes to appearance besides size and some disfigurement.

The zombies are barely a threat in it at all and are no different than the RE1 zombies. Where as in REmake they were probably the most threatening they've been in the series. Between being bullet sponges and coming back as crimson heads.

Marcus sucks. Sure you wanna make him young, but why does he have to be this operatic final fantasy faggot.

Proto Tyrant is awesome though. Way cooler than T-002 because it's busted and imperfect.

They cock tease RE2 areas. And the whole magic elevator thing. I remember reading debates on RE forums if it's the same lab from RE2... like look at the fucking place, it's an exact duplicate. But it begs the question how fucking Hunters are within the city in Zero, as well as Proto Tyrant... in the RE2 lab that was operating during this time.

How the fuck did Enrico get into the RE2 labs from the woods and then back out to the Mansion?

Billy is Billy. Completely carried by his character design, but that's fine. I love Rebecca, but they made her such a baby in it that you just never wanna play as her when you have access to Billy since he's a tank.

Richard Waugh as Wesker is probably my favorite thing in Zero tbh. Seeing him ham it up with Birkin was nice to see finally.

I've gone years debating whether Zero or CV is the worst of the old series and it's clearly Zero. CV may play like shit and it's game world being too bloated, but the plot at least is consistent and different.

 

[Brain Problems]

Zero starts great with the train being a lovely idea of an area but goes dogshit so fast it's gives you whiplash. I still remember saying to myself, Christ this is retarded even by RE's low low standards when we got that cutscene of a dude in a dress SINGING TO LEECHES. Just... what the fuck? Annoying to play from top to bottom, wildly incompetent after the legendary job they did on 1.

The game would have been tolerable if it had handled the dual characters like RE2 did with just two entirely separate/swapped scenarios with occasional meet-ups but nooo that's too derivative! People liked it too much in 2, can't do that again can we. And yeah, like @Wesker says, the enemies suck, worst roster of the series by far. Do you like ANIMAL/INSECT but SCARIER? No, Capcom, I don't.

I wish we had actually gotten the N64 version of that game. In my heart it turns out to be actually Good.

 

[The handsome tard]

Edit: Ahh yes, I almost forgot. Not sure if this is an unpopular opinion but this?

scarier than this

Its the presentation and the face that gets me. The head falling off and revealing the munched up side with that scare cord, followed by this oddly uncanny valley looking human slowly turning towards you with a neutral expression and groan just gets me more than the REmakes (not that its bad, but it felt like it tried to be scarier which unironically worked against it).

I still remember saying to myself, Christ this is retarded even by RE's low low standards when we got that cutscene of a dude in a dress SINGING TO LEECHES.

Oddly enough? This isnt the first time a concept like this happened in the series as we would see it again in The Darkside Chronicles (Why is it called "Dark side"? At least Umbrella Chronicles made contextual sense) with a female character in South America keeping a BOW at bay by singing to it, that is until Leon and Krauser arrive and it triggers the boss fight. Why its not stupid here but it is in Zero? Simple, context.

In Chronicles, the girl was infected with the T-Veronica virus and this BOW used to be her own mother so there is an established connection between both that kind of explains how her singing is able to reach into the human this creature used to be and its not like the girl was a regular human at this point (she even demonstrates a similar transformation to Alexia at the end of the game, including the fire blood, tho she is able to turn back to normal, showing she isnt like Alexia where it mattered). Meanwhile Marcus wearing a white robe and singing to control the leeches felt...out of place in a way, especially in the presentation style of REmake. I

Obviously what Im trying to say is for Capcom to stop being lazy bums and port the Chronicles duology on PC with online coop already, damn it.

And yeah, like @Wesker says, the enemies suck, worst roster of the series by far. Do you like ANIMAL/INSECT but SCARIER? No, Capcom, I don't.

At least we can all agree the leech-men pretty good, right? Its the way they move, man, it eerks me.

 

[Wesker]

Edit: Ahh yes, I almost forgot. Not sure if this is an unpopular opinion but this?

scarier than this

Its the presentation and the face that gets me. The head falling off and revealing the munched up side with that scare cord, followed by this oddly uncanny valley looking human slowly turning towards you with a neutral expression and groan just gets me more than the REmakes (not that its bad, but it felt like it tried to be scarier which unironically worked against it).

I love the REmake zombies more than anything, but yes something is so disturbing in the original FMV. I think the lack of detail but execution makes it more effective. Something I like about REmake is that you only see Kenneth and the zombie, and everything is a black void.

 

[huckbeine]

Zero sold like shit and has next to no fanbase. Capcom are fucking retards but the writing is on the wall it wouldn't sell at all enough to warrant a complete rebuild.

And there's a very vocal amount of troons that NEED RE1 in the over the shoulder slop. They'll do it by the 30th anniversary.

As for CV, it's what actually needs a remake. The plot and everything is fine (not for today's world) but the game just feels like dogshit to play. So they'll just reuse the RE2R formula again and go to the Ashford story with a hatchet because crossdressing cannot be painted in a bad light when Capcom uses trannies for their spokesmen.

I genuinely think that CV remake can make the story be fixed, it will just need Capcom to take extreme bravery to do it

bring back Ashford as the family of nazi scientist just like the initial concept. as for crossdressing freak, just explain that since Ashford twins are clones from a female, you actually cannot make a clone of XY chromosomes from XX, since the scientist were able to do it, that makes Alfred feel like a woman sometimes. can appeal to the "its the genes that makes me feel a woman inside" kind of lgbtbbq++ people

 

[crunchy bits are the best]

scarier than this

Its the presentation and the face that gets me. The head falling off and revealing the munched up side with that scare cord, followed by this oddly uncanny valley looking human slowly turning towards you with a neutral expression and groan just gets me more than the REmakes (not that its bad, but it felt like it tried to be scarier which unironically worked against it).

Even without the chewed head of Kenneth in the scene, the dramatic head turn and giving you the stare of the original is still creepy compared to the almost non-existent pupil of the remake although the remake gave us Crimson Heads, though.

 

[Coldgrip]

I think a survival/horror game set in the RE universe could be neat. Though I don't know how capcom would pull that off, and as much as I'd like to see more of Racoon City, there's only so many prequals and side-stories I can take.

All the monsters are mostly just big things of smaller things. Plague crawlers, the eliminators, the bat, the web spinners, the stinger and the centurion. All boring animals with minimal changes to appearance besides size and some disfigurement.

The eliminators are one of those enemies that every time you think about them, you feel to opposite about whether or not they could of actually worked as an enemy.

 

[Giga Brainlet]

scarier than this

I think one thing that makes the original creepier than the remake is that the OG zombies eyes aren't the eyes of a corpse. They look like the eyes of a psychopath. The eyes seem to have a sort of malicious intelligence behind them. Was that the original intention? Probably not. Did the original give me nightmares cause I was like 10 years old when I played it? Absolutely.
It reminds me of the tarman from Return of the Living Dead.

Spoiler: Tarman

 

[The handsome tard]

I think one thing that makes the original creepier than the remake is that the OG zombies eyes aren't the eyes of a corpse. They look like the eyes of a psychopath. The eyes seem to have a sort of malicious intelligence behind them. Was that the original intention? Probably not. Did the original give me nightmares cause I was like 10 years old when I played it? Absolutely.
It reminds me of the tarman from Return of the Living Dead.

Spoiler: Tarman

View attachment 6579663

The classic "Ichy, tasty" diary entry implies that the zombies might actually retain some level of understanding. Hell, the series actually sort of leans that the T-Virus zombies might horrifyingly be aware of what is going on to them. I recall that there is a pachinko game that has Forest's zombie chasing Chris, begging him to put him down. When he finally does it, with a rocket launcher, Forest even says "Thank you!" before being blown to pieces. I know that its a pachinko machine game but there is also Zombie Brad in the RE3 remake saying "Sorry" to Marvin before attacking him. Even if it was just repeating what he was hearing, thats still something beyond of a what a zombie can even do.

All in all, the possibility that somewhere inside, they are still "there" makes the idea of becoming a T-virus zombie a whole more horrifying

 

[Wesker]

The eliminators are one of those enemies that every time you think about them, you feel to opposite about whether or not they could of actually worked as an enemy.

They are such fucking dogshit. These no more than 70lb little niggers tanking shotgun blasts lol. Go fuck yourself. Both them and leech man are programmed so shittly.

 

[Junkers 87]

They are such fucking dogshit. These no more than 70lb little niggers tanking shotgun blasts lol. Go fuck yourself. Both them and leech man are programmed so shittly.

It's frustrating that Zero was willing to take so many liberties with its newer, shittier monsters while ignoring the strides that REmake had made with the series' mainstays: zombies.

Eliminators are odd. I would've assumed that they're glass-cannon enemies but they can eat 3-4 shotgun blasts to the face before going down. I'm going to continue my playthrough to test this, but I would not be surprised if the amount of shells needed to kill an Eliminator is the same as that needed for a Hunter. I also wonder if whoever programmed these enemies had a sadistic streak. The Eliminators that spawn in the training facility past a certain point in the game seem to only serve the purpose of punishing new players for daring to forget that the hookshot exists as they backtrack for it.

Leech Man annoys me. The game provides a method to kill him using Molotov cocktails, but it's never really necessary. Even when he is killed, he litters the area with turds that do nothing except waste everyone’s time, interrupting Rebecca and Billy by crawling on them while dealing next to no damage.

What this game needed was badass zombies. Something approaching, or even exceeding the threat-level posed by REmake's zombies. You have 2 characters, so that's theoretically twice the firepower. There's 2 shotguns and a grenade launcher that are found fairly early in the game. It would've turned the dining room and the two nearby corridors into actual flashpoints, maybe even something approaching the mirror hallway in REmake. If they retained REmake's Crimson Head mechanic, then we would've had an actual, good use for the molotov cocktails outside of the leech fags that everyone just runs past anyways. Tougher zombies with a possibility of reanimating into a stronger form could also make the forced solo sections scarier too.

Also, fuck the giant bat. Traditional RE games are not suited for enemies that interfere with the player's ability to aim. It doesn't feel like a real challenge; rather, it feels like the game is exploiting flaws in its own mechanics.

 

[Coldgrip]

They are such fucking dogshit. These no more than 70lb little niggers tanking shotgun blasts lol. Go fuck yourself. Both them and leech man are programmed so shittly.

I mean sure, but stop and think about it: Zombie monkeys. Capcom could of done something with that, I mean, they wanted to in RE 1.5 with the B.O.W. gorillas in the back of the police van.

Everybody screaming about monkeys, guess everybody collectively forgot about the giant frogs.

Also, fuck the giant bat. Traditional RE games are not suited for enemies that interfere with the player's ability to aim. It doesn't feel like a real challenge; rather, it feels like the game is exploiting flaws in its own mechanics.

Which is funny when you realize the best way to beat that boss is to exploit a flaw in it's own mechanics.

Funny being subjective.

 

[Miller]

I'm back in RE4 Remake. I've just met Salazar and I don't know if they were inspired by that character for the remake but he looks and sounds like Londo Mollari from Babylon 5

 

[Junkers 87]

Which is funny when you realize the best way to beat that boss is to exploit a flaw in it's own mechanics.

Funny being subjective.

I'll be honest with you here. Despite looking up multiple tutorials as well as having earned my S-Rank on Hard mode in the past, I have never, not even once, been successful in stun locking the Giant Bat with the grenade launcher + Flame Rounds.

 

[30+GameOvers]

I've checked the Steam Halloween sale, which is still going on for a few days. There are several RE games that are on sale, if you're interested, up to the RE4R. You could easily grab several older ones for less than the full price of a new game.
Just do be aware, Capcom added in copy protection to Revelations and 5, I would suggest just pirating these out of principal.

 

[Snekposter]

I'm back in RE4 Remake. I've just met Salazar and I don't know if they were inspired by that character for the remake but he looks and sounds like Londo Mollari from Babylon 5

Now that you mention it it seems to me that even in the original he has a little bit of that same feel. Not that I'm complaining since Londo is a fucking glorious character you love to hate, right up there with Mistaaah Moooordeeeen.

 

[Miller]

Now that you mention it it seems to me that even in the original he has a little bit of that same feel. Not that I'm complaining since Londo is a fucking glorious character you love to hate, right up there with Mistaaah Moooordeeeen.

In the remake he seems to sound way more closer to Londo, especially when he says "misssteeeer Kennedy". The accent is less spanish and more german or romanian:

 

[Smaug's Smokey Hole 2]

RE4Make is on sale so I bought it and have played it for a bit. It's pretty decent but for some reason the movement feels clunkier than OG RE4.

 

[wholetthegodsout]

There were some debunked rumors earlier that RE 9 was going to have Jill and Leon in it.

Personally I want a return of two characters each with intertwining but different scenarios for an RE game. RE2 OG handled it masterfully and I cant figure out why they never went back to that formula which made replay really fun.