Restaurants that should exist

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Bnuny said:
You know conveyor belt sushi? That for sandwiches/burgers.
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America use to have these Automats restaurant chains where different cooked sandwiches, burgers and pies are stored in a glass window with coin slots and you just pick what you wanted.

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- A place like Ford's Garage but Nintendo-themed. The flagship Mario Burger is a cheeseburger with sauteed mushrooms. The Luigi Burger is the second-best hamburger on the menu. Also there's Mona Pizza, Goron steaks, Donkey Kong banana puddings, a Min Min pasta bowl, and Yoshi omelettes.

- A beach-themed restaurant with good cocktails. Attractive all-female staff (no fatties or troons) will dress in swimsuits to serve you.

- A restaurant that serves late 18th century cuisine. Think Townsends with a bit of British/French nobility food thrown in.

- A high school-themed restaurant that serves slightly bougie versions of cafeteria food served in a cafeteria line to cater to millennials. Like Luby's but with more off-the-wall decor and less stuff like liver and onions. No tipping required.

Ughubughughughughughghlug said:
My Pa has talked about a Great Lakes chain called that that served fish. I've never been there, it's nearly extinct. It was compared to the fish camp restaurants Captain D's and Long John Silvers, which is all the same shit at the end of the day. Captain D's is regional and had an explicitly Southern menu (like hush puppies and green beans w. ham and such as sides). Long John Silvers was disgusting garbage.
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Zuider Zee? Alfie's? H. Salt Fish & Chips, Esquire?
 
smartypants302 said:
America use to have these Automats restaurant chains where different cooked sandwiches, burgers and pies are stored in a glass window with coin slots and you just pick what you wanted.

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I remember those, they were in racks that spun around. Press the button to rotate column and then pay to open the door of the desired snack. Until now it never occurred to me that they’re not around anymore.
 
I want a lolcow cafe that serves famous dishes from Internet history. Let me get a King Cobra sushi cheeseburger with a slice of Aunt Myrna's party cheese salad for dessert.
 
Xarpho's Return said:
- A restaurant that serves late 18th century cuisine. Think Townsends with a bit of British/French nobility food thrown in.
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They should go one way or the other. A frontier restaurant could be cool. Simple food in a log cabin style interior.
Nobility dining probably still exists in the halls of the old money elites. Nouveau rich probably just want a modern restaurant so they can dress their girltoy in a skimpy expensive dress without looking out of place. The general populace won't be able to handle the cost of hours of dining, paying the table boy to refill their drinks, and the expensive costume (there will be a dress code).
 
Waffle Iron said:
hey should go one way or the other. A frontier restaurant could be cool. Simple food in a log cabin style interior.
Nobility dining probably still exists in the halls of the old money elites. Nouveau rich probably just want a modern restaurant so they can dress their girltoy in a skimpy expensive dress without looking out of place. The general populace won't be able to handle the cost of hours of dining, paying the table boy to refill their drinks, and the expensive costume (there will be a dress code).
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I was thinking maybe a bit of the higher-end food items, but you're right, probably would seem simple enough as it is. Still, I don't want meat pies to be the pinnacle of dining there, that sounds a bit rough.
 
One I've thought of for a long time:

Yo Cheffy

Customer doesn't order a meal they order ingredients, tick a list of spices etc that they don't want/can't have and the chefs make them dishes at random from the stuff they've ordered.
 
ramen's a pretty versetile food. i want different american style ramen fusions. gumbo ramen, ramen with crabcakes, tomato soup ramen you can dip sandwiches into. ramen.
 
smartypants302 said:
America use to have these Automats restaurant chains where different cooked sandwiches, burgers and pies are stored in a glass window with coin slots and you just pick what you wanted.
Click to expand...


Tax: I would like a fantasy / medieval themed restaurant that went beyond just serving mead, but some actually interesting and uncommon recipes you don't see unless you make them yourself, like the elder scrolls sweet rolls, for example.
 
Lizard Pope said:
Words cannot express my contempt and hatred for the soulless scum who want this sort of shit.
It was a visceral, physical reaction.
Death to… this shit.
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"Dahir Insaat" sounds like jeet shit, but I'm not sure how can you design this elaborate airport luggage-style network above and below the dining area and then claim you're saving money.

The thing about restaurants is that despite the fact that they pretty much have to be built with grease traps and special water/power/HVAC systems, they're still buildings that can be used for just about anything. Here, not only do you have to build a three-story structure you can't even rearrange the tables. If such a restaurant existed, it would be one of those places that gets a lot of press when it opens and then goes under in less than a year or whenever investor money stops, because it loses thousands of dollars every single day (and that assumes it works, seems like it would be malfunctioning constantly).

And then after it closes, it sits as a white elephant on the market with the equipment torn out (not usable as a food establishment as the kitchen is on the third floor, but the dishwasher is in the first floor or basement) before being unceremoniously demolished for two or three drive-through restaurants that actually turn a profit.
 
Super Mario Brothers said:
i once encountered a place that sold edible cookie dough like ice cream but it immediately closed down, so that i guess.
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My ex found a vendor online for something like this. She thought it was the greatest shit in the world, but I found the dough underwhelming and the cookies it made too greasy. How do you fuck up chocolate chip cookies?!
Zeftax said:
Tax: I would like a fantasy / medieval themed restaurant that went beyond just serving mead, but some actually interesting and uncommon recipes you don't see unless you make them yourself, like the elder scrolls sweet rolls, for example.
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This makes me want to have a venison and wild game themed restaurant. The damn things are overpopulated, so why not pay some hunters to supply the restaurant? Advertise it as nature to table.
 
Xarpho's Return said:
- A place like Ford's Garage but Nintendo-themed. The flagship Mario Burger is a cheeseburger with sauteed mushrooms. The Luigi Burger is the second-best hamburger on the menu. Also there's Mona Pizza, Goron steaks, Donkey Kong banana puddings, a Min Min pasta bowl, and Yoshi omelettes.
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Be careful what you wish for. Randy Pitchford's wife owns a restaurant called Nerdvana that is video game themed. You can take a look at the menu here; note headings such as "Multiplayer" instead of appetizers. Personally I think it looks insufferable and overpriced. Also, I'm sure exactly what you are asking for exists at the Nintendo theme park.
 
Something similar to how sinse Bojangles has all day breakfast, you can technically order a tub of sausage gravy with the tenders. Basically a place that does that without it having to be a special order. Maybe some waffles instead of fries but add a lil potato starch to the batter. Top it off with a Sonic route 44 jumbo soda or a milkshake.
 
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