Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[A Very Big Fish]

Wasn't there already a Buzz Light Year movie (and tv show iirc?) that was basically the toy's backstory?

I could've sworn I remember seeing something like that around the turn of the century. Of course, reboots and disney go together like cocaine and heart attacks.

 

[Open Window Maniac]

Robert would simp for the "efficiency" of the Cardassian justice system.

For non Trek fans, in the Cardassian justice system you are presumed guilty and all trials are show trials with the purpose of having the "defendant" admit to their guilt. Executions are public displays where the family is forced to be present so their emotions can be enjoyed by the public.

I can see Bob making a video titled "Why the Cardassian justice system is Superior" or something like that.

Flash Fact: JonTron's videos get millions of views within days despite his much slower schedule whereas Bob is extremely lucky if he breaks six digits.

Jon's videos have three elements Bob's are completely devoid of: charisma, passion, and talent. Jon's videos are super re-watchable and have active comment sections despite some being over half-a-decade old. Bob's videos are so bad they make me wish I could delete someone else's YouTube channel.

It's partially that, but it's also partially to again sell the lie that he's a Gen X'er. Remember, Bob is so massively ashamed and desperate to not be a millenial (and he is, he's just one of the first of them to be born), that he had to insert that in as he desperately tried to wave away the memento mori he's facing.

 

[Giga_Nigga_28]

The tail end of the convo about MCU's supposed grey morality:

It is innately bad Robert. Is he really wondering why there wasn't a scene where all the characters sit down and weight the pros and cons of genocide? Outside of well...the genocide, Infinity War is a Marvel movie its not, and has never been, that deep.

Also Thanos' plan was fucking stupid and would've never worked. Why didn't he just double all the resources?

 

[JayHarrison]

Truth hurts:
View attachment 2665179
The money of SA emerald miners is not yours either, Bobby.

I've parsed your words, Mr. Chipman. My conclusion is the same as every other sufficiently intelligent human being who parses your words:

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Assange:
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Problem here for Bob: Two aspirin are nowhere near enough to cure his terminal case of stupid.

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View attachment 2665185

And this is reason to celebrate... why, exactly?

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Football stars exists but "God" is an empty category:
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I could easily move into Moviebob's crainal cavity because it's a nice, spacious place to live... but the overwhelming stench that emanates from the surrounding real estate makes Bob's cranial caity unlivable without a hazmat suit.

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Bobby explains Uncanny Valley:
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"...there was an evolutionary reason to be afraid of something that looked human but wasn't." If that's the case, then Moviebob was born of the Uncanny Valley; the only elements that resemble humanity is Moviebob's appearance.

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Oh, believe me, Mr. Chipman: If you got into a debate with Boondocks creator Aaron McGruder, there's gonna be an inevitable curb-stomping, and it's gonna be damn near impossible to clean your blood from McGruder's wardrobe.

 

[Woe-B-Gon (TM)]

But in general, those books are pretty much heresy from the lens of anyone versed in warhammer.

Ahahahaahahaha, I see what you did there.

To provide slightly more relevant commentary, I find it interesting that as GW has attempted to inject more hope and light into the grimdark, their policies for dealing with fan creators has been turning more... well, grim and dark.

Does he even need poop? I imagine Bob leaves a thin layer of grease on everything he touches.

Is that why he gets along with the Chu Chu train?

 

[The Valeyard]

You are expecting Bob to remember a cult classic that wasn't on the Wii. Hell, has he even played No More Heroes?

James Gunn was a writer on it so there's a slim chance he might, but as Bob is a poseur with everything else, it wouldn't surprise me if he's a poseur in his James Gunn worship as well.

 

[glib]

You know, I don’t get why Bob and his ilk take their kid stuff so seriously. It’s okay to like kid stuff but it’s not okay to be consumed by it.

I’mma power level here and tell you about this person I knew. This guy was a total fanboy of Disney’s Tangled franchise. The guy was pretentious, egotistical and he practically worshipped Rapunzel and Flynn Ryder. He also mocked everyone who liked characters he hated and call them immature fanboys.

I don’t understand why these ‘people’ can’t just enjoy things without putting it on a pedestal.

Just have fun and don’t worry about it.

They live a vicarious life through it.
It's why the inversion of such things is utter rejection.
Whenever a new sequel to something i really liked comes out, it always kills it a bit.
By changing the canon, you're changing the memory.
But...if you're a culture critic who makes money as a reviewer, well then you have to watch it.
You're a fan? That means you have a lot of art and attachment? That means you're invested?
That means you can be emotionally swayed by such things.

Let's look at Werner Herzog real quick for no reason whatsoever.

I have the impression that the images that surround us today are worn out, they are abused and useless and exhausted. They are limping and dragging themselves behind the rest of our cultural evolution. When I look at the postcards in tourist shops and the images and advertisements that surround us in magazines, or I turn on the television, or if I walk into a travel agency and see those huge posters with that same tedious and rickety image of the Grand Canyon on them, I truly feel there is something dangerous emerging here. The biggest danger, in my opinion, is television because to a certain degree it ruins our vision and makes us very sad and lonesome. Our grandchildren will blame us for not having tossing hand-grenades into TV stations because of commercials. Television kills our imagination and what we end up with are worn out images because of the inability of too many people to seek out fresh ones.
-Werner Herzog

Worn out images because of the inability of too many people to seek out fresh ones.

 

[Gaear Grimsrud]

You are expecting Bob to remember a cult classic that wasn't on the Wii. Hell, has he even played No More Heroes?

Bob is familiar with No More Heroes.

I remember him fawning over it back in the day in his old videos. Don't remember which ones.

--Found something.

He talks about No More Heroes at the very beginning of the very first Game Overthinker episode.

And I love how he is IMMEDIATELY defensive and angry about "hardcore gamers" allegedly looking down on the Wii.

 

[Pokemonquistador2]

Regarding Bob's opinion on the Uncanny Valley - a better explanation would be that humans have evolved to detect illness and madness -two conditions that can leave subtle signs on a person's face and figure. A lot of genetic conditions can also alter a person's face into something that looks uncanny, and while today those conditions may not be that big of a liability to a person, in times past, they might have impeded survival just enough to drag down the people around them. I highly doubt it has anything to do with Bob's "caveman" theory, since genetic evidence reveals that Cro-Magnon humans were perfectly willing to bang Neanderthal and Denisovan hominids.

Also, I'm watching Swamp Thing as part of my 31 Days of Horror, and it features a science potion that turns anyone who drinks it into a physical manifestation of their inner self. The villain drinks it, thinking it will turn him into a physical and intellectual god, but instead it turns him into a furry, savage monster. If Bob came upon such a potion, he'd probably think it would turn him into a Chad version of Jay Sherman with rippling muscles. Now, one might be tempted to think it would turn Bob into some kind of slime monster oozing hatred from every pore, but I'm convinced it would have no effect at all. Bob already IS the physical manifestation of all of the hatred, grease and bile that lives inside of him.

 

[Krokodil Overdose]

It is innately bad Robert. Is he really wondering why there wasn't a scene where all the characters sit down and weight the pros and cons of genocide? Outside of well...the genocide, Infinity War is a Marvel movie its not, and has never been, that deep.

Also Thanos' plan was fucking stupid and would've never worked. Why didn't he just double all the resources?

This is more of Bob missing the point, even though he'd be all over it if he was half as smart as he thought he was. Thanos's plan was retarded, though he gave some explanation (as I recall) that once he'd exterminated half of all life, the other half would flourish, be grateful for the huge favor he'd some them, and adopt his depopulation plan as policy. This is insane, of course, but it's a kind of insanity we're familiar with: it's exactly the same as Twitter communists who think that once TRUE communism is achieved, everything will be perfect and everyone will realize how they were right all along.

Ironically, this should make Thanos what Bob considers the source of all evil: a True Believer, a man so enamored of his vision that he can't grasp the monstrosity of it, and considers himself a persecuted visionary because people are trying to stop him.

All that aside, though, what made Thanos compelling wasn't his plan (which was dumb) but the character himself. He wanted to help the universe, had a plan, and possessed the courage of his convictions, to the point where he would sacrifice possibly the only person he loved to see them through. And he was a monster.

 

[whatever I feel like]

Also, I'm watching Swamp Thing as part of my 31 Days of Horror, and it features a science potion that turns anyone who drinks it into a physical manifestation of their inner self. The villain drinks it, thinking it will turn him into a physical and intellectual god, but instead it turns him into a furry, savage monster. If Bob came upon such a potion, he'd probably think it would turn him into a Chad version of Jay Sherman with rippling muscles. Now, one might be tempted to think it would turn Bob into some kind of slime monster oozing hatred from every pore, but I'm convinced it would have no effect at all. Bob already IS the physical manifestation of all of the hatred, grease and bile that lives inside of him.

Well, it would probably still make him fatter somehow.

 

[Smithfield Ham]

This is more of Bob missing the point, even though he'd be all over it if he was half as smart as he thought he was. Thanos's plan was exceptional, though he gave some explanation (as I recall) that once he'd exterminated half of all life, the other half would flourish, be grateful for the huge favor he'd some them, and adopt his depopulation plan as policy. This is insane, of course, but it's a kind of insanity we're familiar with: it's exactly the same as Twitter communists who think that once TRUE communism is achieved, everything will be perfect and everyone will realize how they were right all along.

Ironically, this should make Thanos what Bob considers the source of all evil: a True Believer, a man so enamored of his vision that he can't grasp the monstrosity of it, and considers himself a persecuted visionary because people are trying to stop him.

All that aside, though, what made Thanos compelling wasn't his plan (which was dumb) but the character himself. He wanted to help the universe, had a plan, and possessed the courage of his convictions, to the point where he would sacrifice possibly the only person he loved to see them through. And he was a monster.

Thanos' plan was meant to be stupid and insane by design, because he's the villain of a children's superhero movie. He has a gauntlet that can do anything and he decides to kill half the people because of some deep seated trauma over his home planet that he never got over, instead of just making infinite resources or giving everyone in the universe extreme foresight and self-awareness so they all make better conservation decisions, or invalidate the second law of thermodynamics so that you never have to worry about depleting resources ever again, or literally anything besides mass genocide. You're meant to feel sorry for him, you're meant to understand his motivations, but his actual plan is extremely idiotic and totally evil.

It was only when GALAXY BRAINED blue curtain analyzers like Bob watched the movie that they started coming up with mental gymnastics about why the plan was actually a good idea and it was just "executed wrong" or some bullshit, because they're raging sophists who think if any idea sounds good on paper, it must be true!

 

[Positron]

Podcast. 19 minutes but you have to endure the ba-ba ba-la-baaaahhhh at the beginning.

 

[The tired cat]

Wasn't there already a Buzz Light Year movie (and tv show iirc?) that was basically the toy's backstory?

I could've sworn I remember seeing something like that around the turn of the century. Of course, reboots and disney go together like cocaine and heart attacks.

You are technically correct, the cartoon was more set in the toys universe and wasnt so much a backstory as it already showed Buzz being a star ranger and fighting various badguys.

 

[blablabla]

View attachment 2666018
Podcast. 19 minutes but you have to endure the ba-ba ba-la-baaaahhhh at the beginning.

wow the shitta you are doing something totally unique and game changer. tell me again why are you asking money for this crap?

 

[Quixotic Man]

Disney must be desperate for additional reviews if they let Chris in to a screener.

I heard that Disney started having additional screeners for Eternals in hopes of getting the Rotten Tomatoes up, but it obviously didn't work.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Damn, Eternals is now the lowest MCU movie on Rotten Tomatoes.

Guess Kevin Feige better take Bob's advise and evolve or get out of the way.

Chloe Zhao, directed it. Which is yet another reason for Bob to simp for it.

Edit: I thought you were talking about the writer/director, my mistake! But to expand on my original point: Bob will simp for a dying franchise (i.e., the MCU) if he has a reason to like it, evolution to the Superior Future be damned.

 

[Captain Marvelous]

Personally I find Bob's tirade about John McCain being an anime protagonist to be one of the funniest thing he ever said for how dumb/absurd it is.

What does he compare Joe Biden and Kamala Harris to?

I don't think they have Joker there, it more seems like a street gang that might be working for him or was semi-inspired by him. But, so far it seems it's just Riddler who's the main player, The Penguin is more like a side guy that Batman goes after for probable info.

I can't tell you how happy I am that we're finally getting another Batman movie that doesn't overrely on the Joker as a villain.

Someone addressed the elephant in Netflix: Cuties.

"Mildly criticized?"

Bob, people are calling him transphobic and Netflix employees are staging walkouts to protest.

More The Batman seething.

Yet the special effects in The Eternals gets a thumbs up from him?

As for Superman belonging to America. Jor-El and Lara may be his biological parents, but it was Jonathan and Martha Kent--two Kansas farmers--that raised Supes and gave him his moral foundation. Chris and Bob are merely an NPCs whose default response to this drivel is to praise their corporate overlords for being stunning and brave.

The thing that so many Superman stories do today is focus more on Clark angsting over not being human and being like a god amongst men, when he's been shown to enjoy life as a human.

There's an episode of the Justice League cartoon where Clark invites J'onn J'onzz (The Martian Manhunter) to his parents' house to celebrate Christmas, and J'onn is taken back by Clark acting so casual. In response, Clark says that he can be himself when he spends the holidays with his parents.

This says a lot about Clark as a character. He isn't some stranger on another world who doesn't know how to be human. At the end of the day, Superman isn't the Man of Steel, Kal-El of Krypton, or whatever religious metaphor you want him to be. Superman is a humble man raised in the heartland of America by two loving parents who helped him to become the best person he can be. The fact that he embraces the American ideals despite being an alien from another planet is a much stronger political statement than what DC is trying right now.

It's probably a combination. We've seen him showing off his terrible cooking before, it's likely his weight loss is because he's making himself sick.

It's a miracle Bob hasn't gotten himself killed yet with the stuff he cooks.

If Bob can’t even grasp Street Fighter, I can’t wait to see what hot takes he will come up with for Yakuza (currently in pre-production) when we eventually see the first footage from that.

He'll probably act like he was always a fan of the games like usual.

It amazes me that MovieBob is such a stan for Robocop without realizing that these exact issues you brought up are importnat theme. And that the entire franchise basically puts his entire vision as part of OCP ideaology.

If Robocop was made today, a chatacter like Bob would totally be one of the villains.

Various cows have brought up Jon Tron in the past few days.

Jon Jafari: While I don't think the COVID-19 vaccines are necessarily unsafe, I personally believe people should be able to choose whether they get vaccinated or not.

The Internet:

Wasn't there already a Buzz Light Year movie (and tv show iirc?) that was basically the toy's backstory?

I could've sworn I remember seeing something like that around the turn of the century. Of course, reboots and disney go together like cocaine and heart attacks.

Yeah, there was. I loved the movie as a kid, and I still think it holds up today. Never watched the show though.

 

[Malagor the dank omen]

The money of SA emerald miners is not yours either, Bobby.

Don't expect Bob to understand that maybe the investment done by Musk into establishing the mines, buying machinery and getting the distribution network to turn the emeralds into money make him entitled to most of the profits from those mines since he made the initial investment and also, he takes the risk for the business failing. Pretty much every leftist does this crap without understanding that the businessman is the one assuming the risk that the business fails. The problem is that modern big businessmen are scumbags driven by unholy amounts of greed rather than providing a good quality service to people.

And i kinda agree that we shouldn't bail out business from failing. But they have every politician by the balls, so they will end up doing it because they are buddies.

 

[Quixotic Man]

Bob, can you not project out your giant Asian fetish for like one day?

Also predicting a Bob 8 or 9/10 on Eternals. He is sucking its dick hard on Twitter and lashing out against Dune.