Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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Lookit the size of that lad on the couch. Absolute unit.
Bob looks at that guy and tells himself he’s normal. But seriously, look how unkempt and dirty they all look. Do the Chipmans have running water, shampoo, soap?

Other photos show Sarah Chipman has a disgusting habit of sitting Indian-style in chairs and putting her shoe-clad feet on seats. If Bob wants to locate the subhumans, he can start with his sister-in-law.
 
Yep, self-hating mayo ghoul. And in case you wondered if the previous photos were just from times when the housekeeper had the month off, peep this. Pay particular attention to the filthy food prep surfaces and grime-encrusted floors.

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I guess “not having access to strong cleaning solutions” is something both brothers struggle with.

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Just like this year, spring 2019 saw the Christmas decorations still out at the Chipmans’ house. Is it possible they haven’t put shit away or cleaned since before Christmas 2018?

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They let their baby crawl all over this disgusting carpet.

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Yes.


Ye GODS! I'm no neat freak, but even I know that having a kitchen counter with grout tiles is a terrible idea. Ptomaine must be a frequent guest at this house. And that kitchen floor looks just like the kitchen floor in the house my family moved into waaaaay back in 1975. (For some reason as a kid, I was obsessed with floors, so I know that pattern well.) Which means that this floor probably predates 1975. And you have the Maytag washer and the crystal knobs on the drawers and browns and harvest golds everywhere. This house is a time capsule. I'm getting nostalgic for Pet Rocks, Bonne Bell Lip Smacker and Sunday afternoons eating spaghettios while watching Bowling for Dollars on a wood-panelled TV.
 
What are you talking about? These people are elite and most certainly not obsolete or genetically defective in any way.

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Man, this image of Bob surrounded by his obese white trash hoarder relatives and fitting right in really feels like an essential piece to the puzzle of his delusion.
 
Ye GODS! I'm no neat freak, but even I know that having a kitchen counter with grout tiles is a terrible idea. Ptomaine must be a frequent guest at this house. And that kitchen floor looks just like the kitchen floor in the house my family moved into waaaaay back in 1975. (For some reason as a kid, I was obsessed with floors, so I know that pattern well.) Which means that this floor probably predates 1975. And you have the Maytag washer and the crystal knobs on the drawers and browns and harvest golds everywhere. This house is a time capsule. I'm getting nostalgic for Pet Rocks, Bonne Bell Lip Smacker and Sunday afternoons eating spaghettios while watching Bowling for Dollars on a wood-panelled TV.
Dated décor is one thing. But they could still keep the place clean and tidy. There is visible filth everywhere and they don’t even see it.
 
Such pronounced arrested development is something we’re used to seeing as observers of lolcows in their natural habitat. But it’s not normal. What happened to Bob?

Are you familiar with the mouse utopia experiment and the term "behavioural sink" that came out of it?
That is what happened to Bob. He is in an environment that keeps him just fed and dressed enough to keep on living, however disgracefully it may look.
 
Ye GODS! I'm no neat freak, but even I know that having a kitchen counter with grout tiles is a terrible idea. Ptomaine must be a frequent guest at this house. And that kitchen floor looks just like the kitchen floor in the house my family moved into waaaaay back in 1975. (For some reason as a kid, I was obsessed with floors, so I know that pattern well.) Which means that this floor probably predates 1975. And you have the Maytag washer and the crystal knobs on the drawers and browns and harvest golds everywhere. This house is a time capsule. I'm getting nostalgic for Pet Rocks, Bonne Bell Lip Smacker and Sunday afternoons eating spaghettios while watching Bowling for Dollars on a wood-panelled TV.
good grief, I would have had the kitchen counters replaced post-haste. Whoever built that house had no clue about how to make a kitchen counter and thought tiles were the thing (or maybe it was the in-thing at the time plus fucking cheap). It's still done apparently but it's literally the worst kind of countertop to have. But then, these are ghoulish mayonnaise hoarders that probably rarely throw anything out let alone replace it, because nostalgia (who knows, maybe their parents' house was like this and they have autistic attachment to that kind of shit).

Oh holy shit, I know that floor pattern, too. I've seen people's houses with it wayyyyyyyyyyy back in the day.

Judging from the walls in the other photos, I'm guessing the chippas are living in a literal brick shithouse.
 
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Super Mario Galaxy-brain take on Economics:
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Our sophisticated cultural elites doesn't understand his fellow cultural elites:
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His Braininess should know that goat landscaping is a thing in San Fran.

Bobby also retweets this pile of bullshit from Arthur Chu.

New Escapist review.
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I don't want to sit through Escapist's ad that takes one minute to load and treats me with three minutes of Bobby's voice -- before the review itself even loads. Also I knew his take on Blood Quantum already.

Hamilton filmed on stage, brought to you by none other than Disney.
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Why couldn't covid-19 kill us all?
 
I feel self conscious about turning my Webcam on for work meetings because I have a pile of things near my desk from home renovations and these mongoloids take pictures of their crap infested house as if there's no problem with how they live. It's got to be some kind of mania.
Gotta feel superior to those obsolete mayo ghouls, even if you are one yourself.
 
Chris's Wedding had a Jay and Silent Bob theme.

Even among this herd of hulking beasts, Bobby still stood out.
Nobody in that video is a good dancer, but at least the others look like they're having some fun. Robert looks like he's being forced to dance at gun point and he's trying to move his limbs as little as possible because it physically hurts him. Which it actually might.

Weight lifter and survivalist, everyone.

Super Mario Galaxy-brain take on Economics:
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Uh... what expensive thing is Robert doing in his basement that isn't taxable? Is this a confession of illegal activity? Should I be worried that he's not spending his money on Onlyfans, but on some much worse dark web alternative? (:_(
 
Bob probably doesn't realize it, but calling other people "obsolete" is a double-edged insult. Because it implies humans only exist to slave away and that once you stop being good at doing that, you'll be replaced and used up. It dehumanizes literally everyone as just disposable tools.
 
Bob probably doesn't realize it, but calling other people "obsolete" is a double-edged insult. Because it implies humans only exist to slave away and that once you stop being good at doing that, you'll be replaced and used up. It dehumanizes literally everyone as just disposable tools.
It’s what we all love about MovieRube. He declares human life worthless if not useful, yet is solidly in the running for Most Useless Fucker on the Planet
 
I feel self conscious about turning my Webcam on for work meetings because I have a pile of things near my desk from home renovations and these mongoloids take pictures of their crap infested house as if there's no problem with how they live. It's got to be some kind of mania.
They also proudly post group photos of their morbidly obese, unwashed, unkempt family and friends. It’s called shamelessness and these are Bob’s people.
 
They also proudly post group photos of their morbidly obese, unwashed, unkempt family and friends. It’s called shamelessness and these are Bob’s people.
They all look like the type of people, who when you have them over for dinner, start eating the table centerpiece if the food isn't brought out fast enough.
 
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