Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

[Godzilla@1989]

Bob is the guy from Hatred if he were a fat, sexless moron that can’t put his fingers in the trigger guard.

 

[Mr Snek]

Hollywood already did this with 2011’s Real Steel.

And Real Steel was actually good. This looks like the most generic robot action movie ever.

 

[BubbleButt]

BTW Chris got a "new" logo:
View attachment 2101904

It looks like shit.

Like an actual pile of shit from someone's asshole.

After said person had eaten Korean barbecue for every meal for a fortnight.

Also I notice a distinct lack of adipose in all of these fat fucking retards. None of them are under 350 elbees.

 

[Cantercoin]

BTW Chris got a "new" logo:
View attachment 2101904

The logo by itself would've sufficed but of course in true chipman fashion he had to bolt in a bunch of bullshit and ruined it with 3 completely different styles.

 

[Marshal Mannerheim]

I'd love to hear his on-the-ground live tweeting after he gets mugged by a stunning and diverse group of youths on the circle line.

Or when he gets called a faggot by a roadman.

or when he talks too loudly about his Superior Future in a pub in the east end of Glasgow

I've often said that if he wants to show that he can really fight he should walk into a bar on the Shankill Road or in Sandy Row and explain to the nearest tattooed guy wearing a Rangers top that he's a liberal, lapsed, Irish Catholic.

Sperging about Israel controlling things is bad, you say?

I'm not sure how ”people criticise me for doing a thing so I'll do that thing to own the cons” is an argument.

Skunk Angel comes out in defense:

1) ”bugman” refers to someone who lives in a pod and eats bugs. The side that called us ”maggots” for four years because we supported the democratically elected President of the United States has no authority to talk about dehumanisation.
2) citing RationalWiki immediately means you lose the argument. It's a hugbox for liberal spergs who think ”haha zombie Jesus” and ”shellfish polyester” disprove Christianity, and who think that anyone who doesn't support trooning kids out is Literally Hitler™.

 

[King Dead]

Capeshit:
View attachment 2101841
Somehow I doubt the 4-7 number. And I wonder why doesn't Bobby review any of those "hundreds of other" movies.

MCU puts the name of indie darling directors on their products while vetos their creative visions. This is enough to fool Bobby to think MCU is somehow "art":
View attachment 2101899

As always, Blobbo misses the point spectacularly.

Yes, when compared to the total number of films released every year, the 4-7 capeshit films are a drop in the bucket (although at the height of the craze pre-coof, I'm pretty sure it was more than that per year). But when compared to the number of tentpole films every year, capeshit is the majority of what you'd end up having to see if you decided to head to the theater.

See, Bobby, major studios can generally only afford one or two of those mega-expensive blockbusters per year, and if they're going to break even (to say nothing of making a profit), they're gonna have to go with whatever gets as many asses in seats as possible. This means taking zero risks and only greenlighting movies that follow the current trends. In a post-MCU world, that means capeshit, and lots of it. So Disney churns out multiple Mahvel movies every year, and Warner Bros. devotes their entire tentpole budget to playing catch-up with their DC licenses. Sony keeps their licenses for Spiderman and adjacent characters alive by putting out their own versions, and Fox had the X-Men until being absorbed into the Disney behemoth.

So you have three studios, previously four, devoting some or all of their mega-blockbuster output to capeshit. What does that leave if you're tired of watching spandexed heroes quipping at each other while they stop a blue laser from firing into the sky, but you still want to watch a big spectacle movie? Universal has the Fast and Furious franchise, as well as their stumbling attempts to turn Jurassic World into a cinematic universe (and the less said about the Dark Universe, the better). Paramount has Mission: Impossible, and uh...can't think of anything else. MGM's still got James Bond I guess, but it's not like the Daniel Craig years have been all that fun.

Thing is, many of these franchises don't have movies coming out every year, usually taking a couple years between installments, if not more. Meanwhile, you're constantly bombarded with yet another capeshit movie every couple months, not to mention all the TV shows that are being spewed out on streaming services (or the garbage that ends up on the CW). Considering all this, I think it's perfectly justifiable to be tired of capeshit and wanting something new.

Now I'm someone who enjoys a variety of films, and I don't just restrict myself to the latest blockbusters. I'm also no snob, so I'll certainly go and enjoy a big dumb movie for the hell of it (I did watch lizard vs. monke, after all, and that was one of the biggest, dumbest movies I've seen in years). But I've pretty much sworn off capeshit at this point, or at least the MCU; I honestly enjoy DC's fuckups more than the standard formulaic Disney garbage these days. As such, I long for a day when I could see some spectacular movie that doesn't involve spandex, but with Hollywood being as slow as they are to abandon trends, that's likely a ways off yet.

I swear, the depths of Bob's ignorance know no bounds.

 

[Red Hood]

View attachment 2101951
What fucking world does he live on where this is an accurate artistic representation of reality? Where's the crowning nose tumor? The lazy, unkempt beard? The absent 300 pounds in the bottom-right?

Is the tagline at the bottom supposed to sound like an epitaph?

 

[blablabla]

Glad the Shitta Let His retard daughter make a logo for him

 

[UserAccess]

Is the tagline at the bottom supposed to sound like an epitaph?

FAT. BALD. IGNORANT. BEGGAR. MANATEE.

 

[Fanatical Pragmatist]

View attachment 2101951
What fucking world does he live on where this is an accurate artistic representation of reality? Where's the crowning nose tumor? The lazy, unkempt beard? The absent 300 pounds in the bottom-right?

Same vibes:

And Real Steel was actually good. This looks like the most generic robot action movie ever.

Real Steel is one of those movies that grows on you.
Like when I first say trailers I was like "ha that's gonna suck", then I saw it on TV and was like "eh, not half bad", having seen it a second time and letting it age a bit more I can go off on a limb and say it was good.

But I also feel like Real Steel was a movie about human characters in a setting vaguely inspired by Rock'em Sock'em Bots, rather than a PRODUCT LABEL film

 

[Mr Snek]

Real Steel is one of those movies that grows on you.
Like when I first say trailers I was like "ha that's gonna suck", then I saw it on TV and was like "eh, not half bad", having seen it a second time and letting it age a bit more I can go off on a limb and say it was good.

But I also feel like Real Steel was a movie about human characters in a setting vaguely inspired by Rock'em Sock'em Bots, rather than a PRODUCT LABEL film

Agreed, I had no idea it was even inspired by another IP, figured it was original. I wonder what Bobs thoughts on it would be, 10 bucks says he loves in for "Robots go bang" and he completely ignores the human side of things or thinks its stupid.

 

[Neko GF]

Original:

Archive (720p):

 

[Oliver Onions]

or when he talks too loudly about his Superior Future in a pub in the east end of Glasgow

I've often said that if he wants to show that he can really fight he should walk into a bar on the Shankill Road or in Sandy Row and explain to the nearest tattooed guy wearing a Rangers top that he's a liberal, lapsed, Irish Catholic.

Dramatic re-enactment of Bob's first and only trip to Scotland:

 

[Positron]

Sheriff Grady Judd warns that if new Florida residents vote for the stupid party that opposes the anti-rioting bill and wants to let more prisoners out, Florida's 49-year-long record of low crime rate will be at peril, livelihood will suffer, and Florida will no longer be the "fun" State that people want to visit and live in.

The solution of Bobby and co.: Turn the whole State into EPCOT dammit!


Senator Rick Scott: Big corps boycott Georgia on the pretext that Georgia did harm to voters' rights. They pat each other on the shoulders for a virtuous job well done, but they are lying. The people -- including the "flyover country" people they despise -- have seen right through them

Bobby: Anti-Semite!



That person, like everyone with a rose next to their username, has no idea how expensive health care is.

China:


TV:

 

[Bolo]

Original:

Archive (720p):
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This is what I deserve for listen in on a Robert's video in months.

What is this retard talking about? Nobody thought that Cloverfield was a fucking Voltron movie.

I was "there" as well Robert, everybody was, cloverfield wasn't that long ago, and a lot of people either thought it was a godzilla movie or were just curious to see what the fuck was going on.

Maybe some assholes on those old ass 2000's movie forums were playing with the idea, but not enough to make it a backlash because the movie wasn't about a shitty 80's cartoon. No one buys that.

This shared universe speculation bullshit is a recent pop culture crap, back then, Abrahms mystery box bullshit was just about a mystery on it's own story.

That aside, this new click bait bullshit "will the *recognizable franshise* show up in the MCU" just can go fuck itself.

I was never against fan speculation, never engaged in much, but I understand it's part of the fun to guess where a story will turn, what will the character do, even fucking shipping I was alright with (before it turned into complete madness that is).

But this "I wanna see the x-men in the MCU, so I can clap to what I can recognize" is so.,.. I don't know how to describe besides "go fuck yourself".

I know I'm the one being autistic here, this shit is meningless, and fuck it, people need those clicks, still, can't shake off this aversion I now have to anything movie/comic related.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Original:

Archive (720p):
View attachment 2102748

This is what I deserve to listen in on a Robert's video in months.

What is this retard talking about? Nobody thought that Cloverfield was a fucking Voltron movie?

I was "there" as well Robert, everybody was, cloverfield wasn't that long ago, and a lot of people either thought it was a godzilla movie or were just curious to see what the fuck was going on.

Maybe some assholes on those old ass 2000's movie forums were playing with the idea, but not enough to make it a backlash because the movie wasn't about a shitty 80's cartoon. No one buys that.

This shared universe speculation bullshit is a recent pop culture crap, back then, Abrahms mystery box bullshit was just about a mystery on it's own story.

That aside, this new click bait bullshit "will the *recognizable franshise* show up in the MCU" just can go fuck itself.

I was never against fan speculation, never engaged in much, but I understand it's part of the fun to guess where a story will turn, what will the character do, even fucking shipping I was alright with (before it turned into complete madness that is).

But this "I wanna see the x-men in the MCU, so I can clap to what I can recognize" is so.,.. I don't know how to describe besides "go fuck yourself".

I know I'm the one being autistic here, this shit is meningless, and fuck it, people need those clicks, still, can't shake off this aversion I now have to anything movie/comic related.

One highlight from that video that drew amusement from me is this:

Bob claimed that this is a Lion when it’s a tiger-based monster. Even more surprised he used a Ultraman Gaia episode to illustrate his shitty point.
Here’s the episode he used for context for those interested.

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

I could not understand a single bit of jargon he said for the first almost 2 minutes save for "Ya know that prediction I made about this TV show? I was wrong tee-hee"

EDIT:
After listening to the whole thing I gotta agree with @Bolo. Who were these supposed people who were dead set in their belief that Cloverfield was actually about Voltron and thenspiraled into depression like the retards who found out that Pandora isn't real and they could never bang a Navi? I'm making a point about this because Bob makes a point about this. It's the last 2 minutes of his 5 minute video. The only point of him bringing it up, that I can see, is so he can say

"Yeah I claim to be in the know and right about almost everything about capeshit and was wrong this time BUT THESE PEOPLE! Man oh man were they ever stupid! Let's divert our attention over there which is conveniently not where I am"

It's like the dumbest lampshade ever.

 

[The Valeyard]

Isn't the only reason that Cloverfield has a shared universe is that the name was slapped onto unrelated scripts for branding purposes?

 

[Ralph Barnhardt]

Isn't the only reason that Cloverfield has a shared universe is that the name was slapped onto unrelated scripts for branding purposes?

Yeap. Cloverfield Lane was a completely unrelated movie until they slapped on the last 15-20 minutes. That Cloverfield In Space movie had even less to do with the original movie until they CGI'd Cloverfield on a few monitors, ADR'd the word Cloverfield into the movie, and then had the monster appear in the literal last second.

 

[Kulee Baba]

Yeap. Cloverfield Lane was a completely unrelated movie until they slapped on the last 15-20 minutes. That Cloverfield In Space movie had even less to do with the original movie until they CGI'd Cloverfield on a few monitors, ADR'd the word Cloverfield into the movie, and then had the monster appear in the literal last second.

At least Cloverfield Lane was indeed solidly made functional horror thriller that could have stood fully on its own without attaching itself to another movie. It also held similar themes to Cloverfield of ordinary modern people reacting to a Lovecraft-esque apocalypse. Frankly John Goodman rarely stars in shit movies anyway.

Cloverfield Paradox or whatever it was fucking called is just the laziest kind of Hollywood asspulls where they take a shit film and try to generate hype by connecting it to something well recieved.