Selecting a Despot for the Autism Thunderdome

As one of the people who effectively just lives in the Thunderdome area and thus lives parasitically off the rest of the site, I feel kind of morally obliged to try and help out in return. I don't have as much free time as might be needed but if you're still looking I can (and I can't believe I'm this stupid) volunteer myself.

I do feel that the best way might be to just emulate Stalin like this guy did (in Minecraft). Seems to work:
 
One year membership or 1000 posts, limit for replying.
Two year membership or 2000 posts, limit for starting threads.
Fedposting is a permanent ban from the farms.
In the before times, when I was a DemocraticUnderground Mod, we actually did 12 peers judgement for "objectionable posts"
We could do that.

Edit: Form a jury pool of true and honest Kiwi Farmers. we're all fucked.
 
Wasn’t there a minimum post number on off topic boards you needed to have before posting back when this was the cwcki forums? I’m probably misremembering but I think @Vesperus is on to something.
Minimum post/lurking requirement on the non-thunderdome part of the farms.
Maybe a 6 month wait before being allowed to post there so any people who signed up here specifically to sperg will have calmed down or at least learn some of the forum culture.

Oh! And very important! Little icons on their profile/name that designate them as newfags until they’ve met the post/lurking requirement. That might be a pain to code but it could shame people into learning how the farms works.
If it’s a post minimum it should definitely be “quality” posts but that would be way harder to regulate now since the site is fucking enormous.
I know Dear Leader will find a way.
 
Oh! And very important! Little icons on their profile/name that designate them as newfags until they’ve met the post/lurking requirement. That might be a pain to code but it could shame people into learning how the farms works.
If it’s a post minimum it should definitely be “quality” posts but that would be way harder to regulate now since the site is fucking enormous.
I know Dear Leader will find a way.
Writing code that removes the icon once they're past a certain time or post threshold? that's really easy to implement code wise.
 
Simple answer. Anyone who posts in A&H has their avatar locked as a funny image. A randomly selected Soyjack maybe. Any rule breaking outside of their containment results in permanent ban. Any janny found to not be containing their ear-marked cattle will be punished accordingly.

Any who enter and post must be branded. Any political sperging is death.
Boy are you gonna be disappointed if you actually read this thread...
I was a DemocraticUnderground Mod,
Opinion disregarded
 
I feel like this might've already been brought up many times, but how about a strike system?
3 strikes = banned from Autistic Thunderdome for 3 months + staff-only label to recognize they've been banned from autistic thunderdome before.
Another suggestion:
Sticker = a specific sticker made for autistic thunderdome where the community can add a specific sticker to posts and after it reaches a certain amount of that specific sticker, the user is put under analysis... Misusing will result in removal of sticker privs (for that specific sticker)
Idk, I think the main thing would be a general rule set. Something along the lines of,
1: don't derail a thread too far off of dedicated subject
2: don't call for violence
 
Huh. And here I was thinking that if I maybe type kike or nigger every now and then I'd start to fit in.

If the problem is that the people who shit up the threads are trying to make a scene and derail the conversation, maybe one thing you could try is have regular and sane contributors manually put on a list who can post normally - generally the people who post or comment and leave it or who can have a back and forth and disagree without resorting to being belligerent. Everyone else who is logged in can comment, but they cannot start new posts, tag or quote people, their comments are automatically minimised for everyone else and need to be clicked to be read, until a moderator decides they can be a trusted with regular privileges. The admission process then becomes a test of conduct, not one's political views. This would allow people to ignore shitposters, prevent pointless vendettas, and allow moderators to filter people at their own pace without it technically being censorship. Maybe article threads could have a timer of 30 days before they get auto-locked to prevent the inexplicable necroing going on.

Then maybe remove the negative stickers completely - nobody will whine about downvotes, and they wont get baited by negative feedback - they'll just get silence. Maybe if a minimised post gets enough positive stickers, it would become visible as a sort of reward, so old users wanting to be regular contributors to A&H just need to behave or be recognised by friends.

Fuck it, I'll never start my own lolcow thread, so I may as well offer myself as mod if it's not too late. My qualifications are, nobody here knows me, I think American politics is fascinating, bizarre and very silly and I hate banning people.
 
In the before times, when I was a DemocraticUnderground Mod, we actually did 12 peers judgement for "objectionable posts"
We could do that.

Edit: Form a jury pool of true and honest Kiwi Farmers. we're all fucked.
that sounds very unproductive and autistic but also very fun.
 
The problem stems from the culture of the board being too different from the rest of the site. People do try to fit in by their nature, but if everyone on the board treats it like /pol/ 2.0 then a new user will do the same.

Most of the solutions I've seen don't really address that core issue they simply hide it from view, which just causes a insular community to be isolated even more. Moderation is desperately needed but I feel like it's pissing into the ocean and even if they did sort it out it, that would bring it's only problems. We all know the type of crazies that use /pol/ and the like, do you think they will react well to being banned?

On the point of moderation. I see a lot of people putting themselves forward to be jannies with the sole qualification being their lack of anything better to do. I know it's a joke but there should be a question of who exactly you'll be able to get to do the job. Asking autists to police autists doesn't sound like a winning formula to me.

What you need to do is to get these users to engage with the Kiwi farms as a whole. Make them integrate with the rest of the site before giving them free rein to use the site. I think something like a probationary period for users who joined after a certain date, have the probation expire after X amount of days and X amount of posts might help with integration. It's a radical solution but think of it like using the whole Kiwi farms as a filter for the board. Maybe they get attached to aloging a particular lolcow, thus spreading the shit out over a greater area or they just drop the forum all together (or banned for that matter) before they get some gay attachment for their account.

You should close the forum to new registrations more often and be more proactive with it. A big pollical event is coming up? Close the registrations. I know this will stem growth and might even lead to the whole site becoming more insular which isn't good if you ask me.
 
128 pages. Only jannie assisting thing I've not seen mentioned is something that was done on a political forum I helped out at for a while, to stop report spamming.

Members had the ability to only report one post per day. They didn't stack. Submit two reports that were considered spurious in 7 days, and you ate a week's site ban for being annoying.
It was both effective and amusing, but it was before discord gay-ops really took off.
 
I'm just resubmitting this post from November. And I'm the only user that gave @CatParty a big congrats for the six-month no burn out.

I volunteer because I'm tired of trannies taking these positions everywhere else on the internet and ruining things I like, and I don't want to see a CIA Nigger 2.0 happen.

My qualifications:
  • I visit A&N daily while posting in misc. cow threads. Have posted in a few Happenings and Deep Thoughts but willing to patrol page ones
  • 2017 account consistent user, remember when it was A&H
  • Regularly report duplicate articles and one-word/image posts but not every single one, depending on the user/context
  • Am not triggered by having 3 perpetual notifications in my header because I'm looped into autistic Conversations. Not bothered by a visibly endless queue of tedious work
  • Mentally prepared to process 10-30 reports a day without burnout, interested in merging related articles into megathreads, and customizing moderator responses/edits/resolutions to agitate delinquents and amuse onlookers
  • Despite my frustrations with trannies, niggers & jews I try to laugh & help others smile
  • If I ever quit, I could articulate the reasons why to improve the experience for the next generation of staffers

My only potential conflict of interest would be my irrational hate for Zoe Quinn, but she's a fat has-been and not in the news anymore. Gamer Time™ comes first and will process some easier reports inbetween match wait/loading times. You get what you pay for!
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You can trust that I don't fuck Planes or Cars.

What you need to do is to get these users to engage with the Kiwi farms as a whole
Friday Movie Night is now compulsory and at gunpoint.
 
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