Nguyen Van Phuoc
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 28, 2018
Since Elon Musk is a name that's coming up often in the happenings, I suppose now is no better time than ever to make this thread.
I fucking hate Teslas. I hate how fucking boring they look (although to be fair at least they're not chasing the gook market and putting obnoxious grilles everywhere like Turkroach Motoren Werken). I hate how they cost as much as some of the most expensive BMWs and Mercedes and Audis yet they look and feel like they were made on the budget of a paper napkin. I hate how fucking minimalesterino and soulless their fucking interiors are. I hate how the Model 3 has convinced retards that driving a car without a dashboard is a good idea. I hate how there's no fucking physical climate controls, I can’t wait for the tardscreen in the middle to break down and all of a sudden you’re not able to turn the fucking air con on. I hate how Teslas have convinced other retarded car makers that removing physical buttons from the car interior is a good idea (see the interior of the new S Class, who the fuck thought that was a good idea). I hate how Teslas have convinced everyone to make even faggier looking EVs that have a bunch of cheap black and blue plastics and LED lighting everywhere so they can go "LOOK AT ME!!! I CAN MAKE FUTURISTIC OVERSIZED RC TOY TOO!!!!" I hate how Tesla is the reason for every FAGMAN/Big Tech company from Apple to Google deciding that they need to work on their own shitboxes that will probably self destruct in two years. I hate how Teslas are designed like fucking Apple products in which that they're a nightmare to repair. I hate the idea of a car that will slowly become even more of a pain of the ass to drive (those batteries gotta degrade eventually), which goes hand in hand with my last point as now you have to get a brand new shitbox every couple of years so, there goes actually owning a car. I hate how every government is going to fucking ban normal cars so sometime down the line we’re going to have to be stuck with fucking Teslas. I hate the idea of a car that you can’t just top up and keep going on a whim. I hate how Teslas have overshadowed other, far better solutions to fuel efficiency like hydrogen cars, diesel cars (which have already been around, mind you), and even fucking hybrids. I hate how much they rely on retarded meme features (DOOD...YOU CAN PLAY... LE CUPHEAD... IN THE CAR !!!!!!!!!). I hate the idea of Autopilot (Newsflash morons: wanna drive without actually having to drive? Ride the bus). I hate how they act like Autopilot is the greatest thing since the invention of cars yet it amounts to nothing more than AI-enhanced cruise control. I hate that stupid bugpeople believe that the Tesla Semi will somehow make those mean, HOONKING truckers go obsolete. I hate that stupid fucking yoke wheel on the Model S Plaid. I hate how fucking retarded looking the Cybertruck looks. I hate the fucking Cybertruck's name (WOWZERS... ITS LIKE THAT HECCIN CYBERPUNK GAME WIT DA BUGS AND THE WHOLESOME KEANU REEVES!!!! HOW KINO!!!!). I hate how fucking boring the cars sound, I know you can't expect electric cars to scream like an F1 racecar but it's still so, bleh.
I hate how almost every discussion of cars is derailed by some Teslafaggot going "DOOD YOUR CARS ARE LE OUTDATED MODEL S PLAID GO ZOOM ZOOM ITS OVER JAJAJA." I hate how that instead of a nice Lambo or a Ferrari (although I wouldn't blame them too much the newest cars from both of these companies are so tryhard), children are probably hanging up posters of a Tesla Roadster, or even a Model S. I hate how when you ask a zoomer what their dream car is, they're not thinking about a Corvette Z06 or a Bentley or a McLaren or even an Aventador. They're thinking about some piece of shit Tesla with panel gap issues up the ass. I hate how almost every Tesla driver has their head shoved so far up their own fucking ass that they're probably coughing dandruff for four months. I hate how a sizable portion of Teslafags are underage children who are probably not old enough to even drive a fucking car. I hate how Teslafags are so fucking smoothbrained they lack the capacity to appreciate the inner workings of a V8, its like if you have a nice Swiss made watch and then some faggot comes up to you and says “AKSHUALLY CHUD MY APPLE WATCH CAN TELL THE TIME WITH ACCURACY OF .000001 SECONDS SO UR GAY”. I hate how they like putting shitty vanity license plates sperging about how "le good" their faggotmobiles are. I hate how they constantly go on about how "they're saving the planet" by driving their Teslas even though if you put a few nuclear power plants and somehow make China disappear you'd have a better chance at stopping "climate change." I how despite all of this, they still use “muh climate change” as a call to arms to act like niggers and go slash other peoples tires for fun. I hate how they just made me sympathize with SUV drivers. I hate how the Ukraine crisis and the rising gas prices have caused them to come out in full force to shill their gay ass Teslas even more. I hate how they act like “HURRR… UR CAR IS LIKE BOMB ON WHEELS… OUR CAR IS LE SAFE BECUZ MUH CRUMPLE ZONE UND MUH ENGINE NOT IN FRONT” yet when an electric car blows up the fire is so fucking bad that they just let it run its course. How fucking safe for everyone else, at least when the fucking Ford Pinto explodes it doesn’t fuck over everyone else on the road. I hate how they act like Elon is the reincarnation of Jesus Christ. I hate how my fucking neighbor's kids think they're the fucking shit because mommy and daddy decided to buy them Model 3s (I hope they total their cars like how this annoying faggot who ran in my circle of friends totaled his Model Y).
I know I sound like I'm MATI. I know I sound like I'm autistic. Fuck that, I am mad at the internet and I am autistic. But I don't fucking care anymore. I fucking hate Teslas and I feel like now with Elon heavily in the zeitgeist it's the right time for me to vent how much I hate Teslas. Reply with your takes on Teslas, Tesla fans, EVs in general, etc.
I fucking hate Teslas. I hate how fucking boring they look (although to be fair at least they're not chasing the gook market and putting obnoxious grilles everywhere like Turkroach Motoren Werken). I hate how they cost as much as some of the most expensive BMWs and Mercedes and Audis yet they look and feel like they were made on the budget of a paper napkin. I hate how fucking minimalesterino and soulless their fucking interiors are. I hate how the Model 3 has convinced retards that driving a car without a dashboard is a good idea. I hate how there's no fucking physical climate controls, I can’t wait for the tardscreen in the middle to break down and all of a sudden you’re not able to turn the fucking air con on. I hate how Teslas have convinced other retarded car makers that removing physical buttons from the car interior is a good idea (see the interior of the new S Class, who the fuck thought that was a good idea). I hate how Teslas have convinced everyone to make even faggier looking EVs that have a bunch of cheap black and blue plastics and LED lighting everywhere so they can go "LOOK AT ME!!! I CAN MAKE FUTURISTIC OVERSIZED RC TOY TOO!!!!" I hate how Tesla is the reason for every FAGMAN/Big Tech company from Apple to Google deciding that they need to work on their own shitboxes that will probably self destruct in two years. I hate how Teslas are designed like fucking Apple products in which that they're a nightmare to repair. I hate the idea of a car that will slowly become even more of a pain of the ass to drive (those batteries gotta degrade eventually), which goes hand in hand with my last point as now you have to get a brand new shitbox every couple of years so, there goes actually owning a car. I hate how every government is going to fucking ban normal cars so sometime down the line we’re going to have to be stuck with fucking Teslas. I hate the idea of a car that you can’t just top up and keep going on a whim. I hate how Teslas have overshadowed other, far better solutions to fuel efficiency like hydrogen cars, diesel cars (which have already been around, mind you), and even fucking hybrids. I hate how much they rely on retarded meme features (DOOD...YOU CAN PLAY... LE CUPHEAD... IN THE CAR !!!!!!!!!). I hate the idea of Autopilot (Newsflash morons: wanna drive without actually having to drive? Ride the bus). I hate how they act like Autopilot is the greatest thing since the invention of cars yet it amounts to nothing more than AI-enhanced cruise control. I hate that stupid bugpeople believe that the Tesla Semi will somehow make those mean, HOONKING truckers go obsolete. I hate that stupid fucking yoke wheel on the Model S Plaid. I hate how fucking retarded looking the Cybertruck looks. I hate the fucking Cybertruck's name (WOWZERS... ITS LIKE THAT HECCIN CYBERPUNK GAME WIT DA BUGS AND THE WHOLESOME KEANU REEVES!!!! HOW KINO!!!!). I hate how fucking boring the cars sound, I know you can't expect electric cars to scream like an F1 racecar but it's still so, bleh.
I hate how almost every discussion of cars is derailed by some Teslafaggot going "DOOD YOUR CARS ARE LE OUTDATED MODEL S PLAID GO ZOOM ZOOM ITS OVER JAJAJA." I hate how that instead of a nice Lambo or a Ferrari (although I wouldn't blame them too much the newest cars from both of these companies are so tryhard), children are probably hanging up posters of a Tesla Roadster, or even a Model S. I hate how when you ask a zoomer what their dream car is, they're not thinking about a Corvette Z06 or a Bentley or a McLaren or even an Aventador. They're thinking about some piece of shit Tesla with panel gap issues up the ass. I hate how almost every Tesla driver has their head shoved so far up their own fucking ass that they're probably coughing dandruff for four months. I hate how a sizable portion of Teslafags are underage children who are probably not old enough to even drive a fucking car. I hate how Teslafags are so fucking smoothbrained they lack the capacity to appreciate the inner workings of a V8, its like if you have a nice Swiss made watch and then some faggot comes up to you and says “AKSHUALLY CHUD MY APPLE WATCH CAN TELL THE TIME WITH ACCURACY OF .000001 SECONDS SO UR GAY”. I hate how they like putting shitty vanity license plates sperging about how "le good" their faggotmobiles are. I hate how they constantly go on about how "they're saving the planet" by driving their Teslas even though if you put a few nuclear power plants and somehow make China disappear you'd have a better chance at stopping "climate change." I how despite all of this, they still use “muh climate change” as a call to arms to act like niggers and go slash other peoples tires for fun. I hate how they just made me sympathize with SUV drivers. I hate how the Ukraine crisis and the rising gas prices have caused them to come out in full force to shill their gay ass Teslas even more. I hate how they act like “HURRR… UR CAR IS LIKE BOMB ON WHEELS… OUR CAR IS LE SAFE BECUZ MUH CRUMPLE ZONE UND MUH ENGINE NOT IN FRONT” yet when an electric car blows up the fire is so fucking bad that they just let it run its course. How fucking safe for everyone else, at least when the fucking Ford Pinto explodes it doesn’t fuck over everyone else on the road. I hate how they act like Elon is the reincarnation of Jesus Christ. I hate how my fucking neighbor's kids think they're the fucking shit because mommy and daddy decided to buy them Model 3s (I hope they total their cars like how this annoying faggot who ran in my circle of friends totaled his Model Y).
I know I sound like I'm MATI. I know I sound like I'm autistic. Fuck that, I am mad at the internet and I am autistic. But I don't fucking care anymore. I fucking hate Teslas and I feel like now with Elon heavily in the zeitgeist it's the right time for me to vent how much I hate Teslas. Reply with your takes on Teslas, Tesla fans, EVs in general, etc.
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