The Chris Chan Conspiracy Documentary

[LolRaccoon]

Chris doing the Apu impression at the Indian restaurant was easily the best part

 

[RainwaterDrop]

He's like a child who throws a fit whenever something doesn't go exactly his way. Every time they asked him to explain more about the merge and his powers he got annoyed they didn't understand him 100%. or when hes trying to find controllers so all three can play games hes irritated and snaps when they suggest any solutions. The dogs are barking too loud? Scream at the top of your lungs, run upstairs and stop your feet in front of your guests to get them to stop barking. Just no manners or respect whatsoever.

Precisely. This is what comes from raising a child without ever saying no to anything they wanted and just spoiling them rotten to calm them down. It's a long mused question, but from the comics themselves we can see how Chris acts and what he expects from the World: The villains are people who either directly confronted him in public and told him off, like mall cops, trolls, police officers, his Dean, his teachers, and indirect villains like the boyfriend of a girl he liked and the concept of his graduation (not directly, but it was the end of his best days in life), the setting is his own little North Korea and he directly fantasizes about girls who just drool for him for being himself. Chris is a shining example of the worst outcomes for these stupid decisions, the only way he could be in a worse off position was if his health was fully in the gutter with cancer or other maladies!

Honestly, despite knowing how much of an awful person Chris is, I can't help but feel somewhat sorry for him. He is severely autistic and needed special education from the get go, instead he got nothing but the sowing of the seeds for his future, becoming the Internet's Village Idiot, moving on to becoming a pariah due to his own actions, but his life was ruined even before he could even talk or walk!

 

[GypsyBard]

Chris doing the Apu impression at the Indian restaurant was easily the best part

CHRIS: I have to do this
Hello my name is apu
EVERYBODY: NO NO NO NO NO

made me actually laugh

 

[Hogar Grupal]

CHRIS: I have to do this
Hello my name is apu
EVERYBODY: NO NO NO NO NO

made me actually laugh

It's pretty telling how long that Indian restaurant was in C-ville, and all Chris went to eat prior to that were American fast food places and southern restaurants. Imagine if they took Chris to eat sushi or Chinese?

 

[A Wumpa Fruit]

CHRIS: I have to do this
Hello my name is apu
EVERYBODY: NO NO NO NO NO

made me actually laugh

The fear on Gamer from Mars and his friend was palpable

 

[Tennis-Ball-Tony]

It's pretty telling how long that Indian restaurant was in C-ville, and all Chris went to eat prior to that were American fast food places and southern restaurants. Imagine if they took Chris to eat sushi or Chinese?

Chris's family used to eat at a Chinese restaurant near his house until his mom got a bout of colitis from eating spicy food there. Of course, Chris and them thought it was food poisoning. He didn't elaborate, but given the Chandlers', I can imagine they would have gone back to confront that place. He's also eaten at some Mexican place near his house frequently.

 

[GypsyBard]

Chris doing the Apu impression at the Indian restaurant was easily the best part

The absolute panic
I honestly think the best part of the documentaries are they're in new interactions with Chris. I actually find myself wanting more of that. Them hanging out with Chris just the pure awkwardness. Him doing his impression and everybody panicking was legitimately the first time I've actually audibly laughed in about a year. Them playing the My Little pony card game just absolute awkwardness. Chris getting angry that he can't find a controller. It's all gold

 

[PsychoNerd054]

Chris's family used to eat at a Chinese restaurant near his house until his mom got a bout of colitis from eating spicy food there. Of course, Chris and them thought it was food poisoning. He didn't elaborate, but given the Chandlers', I can imagine they would have gone back to confront that place. He's also eaten at some Mexican place near his house frequently.

Who hasn't Mexican food is as much a staple as McDonalds in America. Probably can't eat anything unless it has a ton of cheese, though.

 

[Hassa_Bussa]

CHRIS: I have to do this
Hello my name is apu
EVERYBODY: NO NO NO NO NO

made me actually laugh

Among which and so forth Chris also said "this place is fancier than I expected" or something along that line when they were seated, therein implying that because it was an Indian restaurant, it would be a dirty shithole.

 

[Pvt. Real G]

Among which and so forth Chris also said "this place is fancier than I expected" or something along that line when they were seated, therein implying that because it was an Indian restaurant, it would be a dirty shithole.

I doubt Chris has the mental capacity to know where India is or the type of third world shithole it is. Most likely, Chris being the lonely hillbilly on welfare, he doesn't have friends to go explore local restaurants and cuisines. That mid tier Indian restaurant is probably one of the Top 5 fancier restaurant Chris has ever been in his 40 year old life.

 

[TayandYou]

It's pretty telling how long that Indian restaurant was in C-ville, and all Chris went to eat prior to that were American fast food places and southern restaurants. Imagine if they took Chris to eat sushi or Chinese?

I want to see Chris's City Wok impression while everyone tries to get him to shut the fuck up before they get kicked out.

 

[The Un-Clit]

I want to see Chris's City Wok impression while everyone tries to get him to shut the fuck up before they get kicked out.

There's no funny TV Chinamen on Family Guy or The Simpsons, his only sources of world knowlege. And the only funny TV azn he might know is the chick from Futurama and I think she's supposed to be Korean so you don't have to worry about that ever happening.

 

[xXRonPaul_42020Xx]

I know it's been said many times and you can give me alarm clocks, but it still blows my mind that Null--fucking Null--is the only person in Chris's life who has ever acted with Chris's best interests at heart first and foremost.

And it caused him nothing but pain

 

[Guntanator]

I really wish GFM would just show us more footage of his time with Chris. The pure cringe of it all was hilarious and also insightful as to how Chris is irl.

 

[Guinan's hats]

There's no funny TV Chinamen on Family Guy or The Simpsons, his only sources of world knowlege. And the only funny TV azn he might know is the chick from Futurama and I think she's supposed to be Korean so you don't have to worry about that ever happening.

Amy Wong is a Chinese

 

[The Un-Clit]

Amy Wong is a Chinese

Forgot her last name was Wong, thanks. Either way, she has no funny catchphrase that insults the culture, just 'spluh!' so I don't think Chinese restaurants need worry about getting a Chris-Chan impersonation of her.

 

[Ophelia]

The Simpsons has Cookie Kwan the real estate agent, but she’s not a big deal and doesn’t have a catch phrase either. Unless “Number one on the west side!” counts.

 

[Pvt. Real G]

I want to see Chris's City Wok impression while everyone tries to get him to shut the fuck up before they get kicked out.

say no mo fam

 

[FightenGnome]

the setting is his own little North Korea and he directly fantasizes about girls who just drool for him for being himself.

To be honest, I think this is everyone's raw ego fantasy trip to some extent (gender swapped for the girls) so I can't fault him for that power fantasy. The problem is when you take that attitude into real life or present it to the real world as a work of art.

Although, Comic Chris doesn't get any action which seems to be a major oversight in the original 10 canon. Even in his power fantasies he gets friend zoned.

I do find it funny though that Chris takes the fantasy of direct autocrat whose servants bow to him as the Protagonist's role. Usually such an ego-driven desire is made into the villain of the series while the "Plucky Rebels" who sit on councils leading an underground resistance, such as the PVCC, are made to be the heroes but are the villains in Chris' comics.

 

[Uncle Meat]

And it caused him nothing but pain

I think a lot of people tried to help Chris over the years, even Rocky and Mary Lee Walsh. But Chris's parents did absolutely nothing to reel him in. They made it everyone else's fault. Everyone ended up at the same place Null did.