The Dude's Guide to Manliness.

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(reads thread)

Um...hmmm.

I was brought up in a big country family- Two brothers, thirteen sisters- and whatever needed doing, it got done, and the person who did it got props regardless of what in their pants. I've learned most of my life skills from women. Things that are stereotypical "male"- My sister Kat taught me how to drive a bulldozer & work on a bushhog. Donna taught me how to shoot, fight, hunt and dress deer. And all of them taught me to cook. My Mamma would lop the head off a chicken or rabbit in a heartbeat, dress it for the table and not even bat an eye. Old-school down to the bone.

I can field-strip an assault shotgun, I know what colors look good with an autumn skintone, I can give a great pedicure, Fix a wonky tractor, and I love a good bubble-bath after a hard day.

"Manliness" is bullshit.

Don't judge people on how they look, but what's inside them.
Treat people right, don't be an asshole.
Make bank, and be happy.

Those are my life's rules.
 
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The Hunter said:
HUNTER'S (GUY)IDE TO MANLINESS:

1. Accept the fact that no matter how hard you try, nobody's going to think you're a man.

2. Stop giving a shit about what people think.

3. Make yourself a better person rather than obsessing over being a man.

4. Eliminate bacon entirely from your diet.

5. Vote Democratic.
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I'm sorry, I'm not old enough to vote. 80% is still pretty manly isn't it?
 
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Because I just want to dig my hole deeper, let's talk about manly things that are totally not overcompensating for emasculation.

I'll kick off, since my penis belongs to Micheal Bay.

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CompyRex said:
FUCK OFF
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What a cunt. You know, my trial lasted 28 days. And for every single one of those days I had to stare up at that cunt's face while she banged her cunt gavel and instructed the jury to fuck me over. I didn't have a choice. I had to see the cunt. Now I don't have to.
 
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Pikonic said:
Pikonic's guide to being a woman.

Equality FTW! I'd make my own thread but it'd probably get merged here. Now I've dropped a few of these in the past so there will be repeats, deal with it.
1) Never hit your man- They always say a man should never hit a woman. Well, the pendulum swings both ways bitch.

2) Man hating is a load of shit- Women will never be considered equal unless we knock off this "Wah, men are evil and have it so easy" bullshit. Feminism is about equality, not having our lives made easier because we have a vagina.

3) If you wanna get paid like a man, you gotta work like a man- Too many times I've seen women play the "70 cents to a dollar" card (which is bullshit, it's about 95), but when the trucks need to be unloaded or the spiders need to be killed, they go ask the guys to do it.

4) Accept your consequences- If you wanna be a slutbag, go for it. Just don't ball your eyes out when you get called a slut or can't find a committed relationship.

5) Iron pills are your best friend during that time- I studied the human body, you feel like shit during that time because of iron deficiency. Not a fan of pills? Spinach, beans, red meat, and fish.

6) A man will not fix your life- You gotta do that shit yourself, why does he deserve your baggage?

7) Be a bitch- I remember when I decided to embrace the bitch title. I was 19 and at a party. This guy wouldn't keep his hands off me. Now, first I was nice. I told him to stop touching me. He played the "but you're so beautiful". One ass grab later he got a few fists. I was called a bitch and told to leave. If a man calls you a bitch for being yourself or standing up for yourself, he is not worth your time.

8) There will always be a man who wants you- Not to sound all Disney on you, but I've seen too many women stay in shit relationships because "I don't know if I could find someone else" Bull. Shit.

9) Don't be dumb- If a man doesn't like his women smart, fuck him. Dumb girls are not sexy, they are dumb.

10) Don't fish for compliments- When you say "I'm fat" you better mean it. None of this "My man has to say I'm skinny" shit. And if he says something like "well, you could go to a gym/let's try to eat better/you could lose a little" don't get mad. He was being this thing called "honest"
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I will only bang women who adhere to these.
Anyway, The Dude's list is pretty comprehensive. There's a blog called Art of Manliness if anyone needs further training.
Sadly, I can't grow a nice beard. I tried several times and it's a mess. But I'm a shaving master, can defend myself and mine, can drive a stick shift, et al.
Also relevant, Robert Heinlein said "specialization is for insects" at the end of a quote on things a man should be able to do. I'll find it and send it to Dude if he's interested. I do recommend AoM since it's how I learned how to tie a half Windsor.
 
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