The Elder Scrolls

[Molly White's Breast Milk]

You know an even easier way to make sure your game never updates? Pirate it. Steam can't update a game if you don't even have the Steam client installed. AAA studios don't deserve your money.

 

[Pierre D'Olnique]

Two of my friends also believed this and woke up with their modlists brutally murdered. Steam can't be fucking trusted. To this day I just terminate it if any game shows me a cloud sync error thanks to fond memories of my saves getting wiped.

 

[DapperShark]

Two of my friends also believed this and woke up with their modlists brutally murdered. Steam can't be fucking trusted. To this day I just terminate it if any game shows me a cloud sync error thanks to fond memories of my saves getting wiped.

Ok now I'm actually worried, I haven't actually touched Skyrim in a while, I'm going to be fucking pissed if I get home and Steam destroyed my game lol

 

[Scream Aim Fire]

But Ulfric despises N'wahs, Lizards and Cats. Wtf.
That's why i'm always siding with him being Nord. Skyrim belongs to us.

Funnily enough, despite being an Argonian main myself, I'm also siding with the Stormcloaks; what can I say? I just really hate elves.

Two of my friends also believed this and woke up with their modlists brutally murdered. Steam can't be fucking trusted. To this day I just terminate it if any game shows me a cloud sync error thanks to fond memories of my saves getting wiped.

Yeah, I've had a ton of trouble getting some mods to work on my PC; half the time, even when I was doing everything correctly, the game would just not load anything. It got to the point where I ended up just giving up.

 

[Friendly Primarina]

Funnily enough, despite being an Argonian main myself, I'm also siding with the Stormcloaks; what can I say? I just really hate elves.

It always was mystifying to me why Ulfric had the Argonians on the docks while the Dunmer got to live in the city. At least Argonians have as much a chance of being a good person as any other race. Dumbmer are all worthless.

 

[Pierre D'Olnique]

It always was mystifying to me why Ulfric had the Argonians on the docks while the Dunmer got to live in the city. At least Argonians have as much a chance of being a good person as any other race. Dumbmer are all worthless.

It's because they'd kill each other. Also, remember the Nord drunk lashing out on the poor Dunmer lady when you first enter Windhelm, accusing her of being a spy? She is a spy.

 

[Friendly Primarina]

It's because they'd kill each other. Also, remember the Nord drunk lashing out on the poor Dunmer lady when you first enter Windhelm, accusing her of being a spy? She is a spy.

Nah, what I meant was shove the Dunmer out onto the docks and have the Argonians in town.

 

[xXx: State of the Union]

It always was mystifying to me why Ulfric had the Argonians on the docks while the Dunmer got to live in the city. At least Argonians have as much a chance of being a good person as any other race. Dumbmer are all worthless.

IIRC, Ulfric wasn't the one who let the Dunmer into the city. It was one of the previous Jarls back when Red Mountain blew up.

So I always assumed it was just a refugee problem he inherited, and either couldn't or didn't care enough to deal with while he was fighting the Empire.

I don't think they ever actually explain what the deal with the Argonians is. If they did I never noticed it. You'd think if they hate it there so much they'd just fuck off back to Black Marsh and hang out with the Hist or something.

 

[Scream Aim Fire]

It always was mystifying to me why Ulfric had the Argonians on the docks while the Dunmer got to live in the city. At least Argonians have as much a chance of being a good person as any other race. Dumbmer are all worthless.

From what I can tell, it's basically because of two reasons; 1, the Dunmer arrived first, and already got settled in, and 2, the Stormcloaks were trying to house the refugees in areas that could better suit them; the Argonians were amphibious and hardier in general, so they were on the docks, while the Dunmer required better housing.

Still, you're not wrong; the Dunmer really don't exactly have much going for them, while the Argonians outright counter-invaded hell itself, so it seems weird that the Stormcloaks didn't just kick the elves out entirely. I mean, there are a few of them that are working there - there's a Dunmer nanny you can talk to - but the fact that they both refuse to assimilate and the fact that there are Imperial spies among them makes it all the weirder. Could be that Ulfric is trying to show pity or something, but...

It's because they'd kill each other. Also, remember the Nord drunk lashing out on the poor Dunmer lady when you first enter Windhelm, accusing her of being a spy? She is a spy.

This is definitely another reason, and part of the issue I have with the Free-Winter guy in the Imperial victory; the game just kind of... ignores the fact that the Argonians have had a rather long and bloody history with the Dunmer, what with the slavery and all. Yeah, the Argonians are more of a "live in the now" kind of race, but that still ignores that there would likely be tensions among the two races for quite some time.

There's also the fact that, you know; the country is currently in the middle of a civil war. The Stormcloaks aren't just going to be able to drop everything and divert assets for the war effort to help out refugees... especially when those refugees, as stated, refuse to assimilate and/or help with the war effort. Doubly so since they're likely Imperial spies.

 

[Ghost of RBG]

IIRC, Ulfric wasn't the one who let the Dunmer into the city. It was one of the previous Jarls back when Red Mountain blew up.

So I always assumed it was just a refugee problem he inherited, and either couldn't or didn't care enough to deal with while he was fighting the Empire.

Inheriting is an understatement. The Red Year happened 200 years ago. Its not even a refugee problem anymore at that point. Its like saying the great-great grandson of a slave moving from Atlanta to NYC is fleeing the plantation and has to worry about whether or not the state will throw him to the slave-catchers.

The new Dunmer capital of Blacklight is closer to Windhelm than Riften is but they're just content to sit in the Gray Quarter and bitch for two centuries? Ambarys Rendar has dialogue that suggests he and most of the other Dunmer moved to Windhelm when the Red Year happened, but the game acts like anything to do with the Red Year happened 10 years ago instead of 200. Fucking ALTMER are living in the city completely unmolested by the Nords but the game wants me to believe that the Dunmer are just sooooo oppressed? If the city that gave refuge to the Dunmer is so bad then leave. Ambarys outright says that if he'd known the Nords would be so mean then he'd have found somewhere else to live, so why doesn't he?

Speaking of the Altmer in Windhelm, one actually talks about the Dunmer and the difficulties of living in Windhelm.

"It was difficult at first. The Nords of this city are, at best, suspicious of outsiders. But in time, I made the right friends and proved myself useful enough that they don't give me trouble anymore. The dark elves are too proud and naive to understand the way things truly are, and so they continue to dwell in that slum."

She moved to Windhelm, got some mild pushback for being a foreigner, then integrated and proved herself a competent and valuable member of the community. The Dunmer make absolutely no attempt to integrate and yet they wonder why the city isn't bending over backwards to appease their every whim during a war.

I don't think they ever actually explain what the deal with the Argonians is. If they did I never noticed it. You'd think if they hate it there so much they'd just fuck off back to Black Marsh and hang out with the Hist or something.

There are what, four Argonians? The game says that Ulfric doesn't let them in because he's mean, but Brunwulf also doesn't let them in. Brunwulf says that he doesn't want to let the Argonians in because he's worried the Nords will kill them. The Dunmer living in the city either lived through the Red Year or had parents who did, but they aren't even so much as mentioned when talking about the Argonians being kept outside. Granted, its been 200 years but the Dunmer have also been content to sit in a slum and whine for 200 years.

Of course, the Red Year and Windhelm being completely fumbled makes sense. Bethesda can't fathom people 200 years after the bombs drop living in anything other than a house with half the walls missing and skeletons on the furniture, but tried to write a 200-year refugee crisis inside of a civil war.

 

[xXx: State of the Union]

Man, I forgot it was 200 years. For some reason in my head I thought it was like 50 years.

Dunmer really are just a bunch of ungrateful niggers.

 

[Super Hans v2]

Man, I forgot it was 200 years. For some reason in my head I thought it was like 50 years.

Bethesda has always been awful with timelines. If the Great War was 30 years ago, why does Delphine look like she's in her 30s, especially with being such a spiteful bitch? If the Great Collapse was 80 ago, why does Winterhold look like it happened last week? Why do people not bother to move random skeletons out of their home after 200 years? For more than 400 Prince Camarill's tomb has been lighting up with a map for 1 hour each day, and no guards on their patrol noticed? What's with all the fresh bread and tomatoes in crypts that have been untouched for thousands of years?

Emil might be by far the worst of Bethesda, but not the only one who should be thrown into traffic.

 

[HeyYou]

Bethesda has always been awful with timelines. If the Great War was 30 years ago, why does Delphine look like she's in her 30s, especially with being such a spiteful bitch? If the Great Collapse was 80 ago, why does Winterhold look like it happened last week? Why do people not bother to move random skeletons out of their home after 200 years? For more than 400 Prince Camarill's tomb has been lighting up with a map for 1 hour each day, and no guards on their patrol noticed? What's with all the fresh bread and tomatoes in crypts that have been untouched for thousands of years?

Emil might be by far the worst of Bethesda, but not the only one who should be thrown into traffic.

Delphine I'll give somewhat of a pass to because the engine really only allows for women that look young or super old and I think the idea is that she's supposed to be closer to 50 or so rather than outright old like all the other old women in Skyrim. The thing is this still goes back to the problem that Bethesda's engine is so shit that they somehow forgot about the age slider in Oblivion that would have made this a non-issue, and instead every old person in Skyrim is their own race in the game code.

 

[xXx: State of the Union]

Aren't Bretons supposed to have shorter lifespans?

Maybe Delphine *should* have used the old person race.

 

[Molly White's Breast Milk]

Aren't Bretons supposed to have shorter lifespans?

Maybe Delphine *should* have used the old person race.

They were also supposed to look like a human/knife-ear hybrid with pointy ears and longer fingers but that would make TES interesting and unique so Emil had to toss that out and make them humans who can use magic a bit better. I use a mod that give Bretons back their knife ears and I couldn't believe how many there were in Skyrim.

 

[Friendly Primarina]

Bethesda has always been awful with timelines.

All the stuff in the Thieves' Guild with Gallus was supposed to have happened 20 years ago, when Brynjolf couldn't have been older than his teens. People far more eloquent than me have pointed out all the little foibles in that questline, but there's so much that only makes sense if you pretend Gallus was murdered last month.

 

[xXx: State of the Union]

All the stuff in the Thieves' Guild with Gallus was supposed to have happened 20 years ago, when Brynjolf couldn't have been older than his teens.

I feel like Bethesda wants us to believe that people grow up fast in Tamriel, but it doesn't come off that way at all because characters in Skyrim are stuck looking like they are either 10 years old, 30-40 years old or 80 years old.

Like, how old are Jon and Olfina honestly supposed to be? They're both having this Romeo and Juliet teenage love affair, Jon wants to go to the Bards College, but then you look at them and Olfina looks like she's in her mid 20's at best and Jon looks like he's fucking 40.

 

[TVB]

Like, how old are Jon and Olfina honestly supposed to be? They're both having this Romeo and Juliet teenage love affair, Jon wants to go to the Bards College, but then you look at them and Olfina looks like she's in her mid 20's at best and Jon looks like he's fucking 40.

At this point, they will age the same way a typical Simpsons character would age when they were first created up until its current airing.

 

[Friendly Primarina]

I feel like Bethesda wants us to believe that people grow up fast in Tamriel, but it doesn't come off that way at all because characters in Skyrim are stuck looking like they are either 10 years old, 30-40 years old or 80 years old.

Like, how old are Jon and Olfina honestly supposed to be? They're both having this Romeo and Juliet teenage love affair, Jon wants to go to the Bards College, but then you look at them and Olfina looks like she's in her mid 20's at best and Jon looks like he's fucking 40.

Also, Fastred and Klimmek. Though, to be fair, that's supposed to be an age gap. It's still weird watching him try to woo Fastred with Popeye Vogelsang's 90-a-day voice.

 

[Molly White's Breast Milk]

Klimmek is the correct choice in the Mara quest line. His leg day is walking up the 7000 steps to drop off food for the Greybeards for free. I'm assuming he works out the rest of his body working at the mill or killing bears for Temba. To unwind he fishes. BassiANUS sounds like Nazeem and wants to live in a city like a soyboy. He should go fag it up in the Imperial City if he loves cities so much.