The General Thread

I didn't eat anything all day today and was ravenous so at the end of the day I ended up getting an 18 inch takeout pizza with kebab meat and a portion of fries. Boy oh boy were my eyes waaaaaay bigger than my stomach.

At least with pizza you can keep it and eat the leftovers the next day, so I can just finish the sides and still have all my food covered for tomorrow as well. I'm planning on doing a lot of cleaning tomorrow anyway ((I'm behind on it because I got sick)), so having food pre-sorted will save me a lot of time and effort. And now I know to eat a snack before ordering takeout so I don't go too mad. :lol:
 
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...all I did was send him a photo of my pizza captioned "the absolute size of this lad" :story:
 
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How do I tell this 6/10 who is clearly into me that:
  • I would like to have a sexual relationship with you.
  • You cannot tell anyone about this.
  • You must be here within fifteen minutes after I contact you for sex.
  • You can never contact me unless it is because you want sex.
  • You must immediately leave after we are done having sex.
  • You have to indulge some of my weird fetishes.
  • You must get on the pill because I do not want to use condoms.
  • You cannot be involved with any other men during this relationship.
 
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ForgedBlades said:
How do I tell this 6/10 who is clearly into me that:
  • I would like to have a sexual relationship with you.
  • You cannot tell anyone about this.
  • You must be here within fifteen minutes after I contact you for sex.
  • You can never contact me unless it is because you want sex.
  • You must immediately leave after we are done having sex.
  • You have to indulge some of my weird fetishes.
  • You must get on the pill because I do not want to use condoms.
  • You cannot be involved with any other men during this relationship.
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Don't.

Just rape them, no one will believe a 6/10 was raped.
 
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Sinners Sandwich said:
Did u guys ever have an emotional painful dream about people that don't exist irl?

I knew these people in my dream and saw them die. I was crying in my dream and now after waking up still feel bad.

Wtf
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I don't recall having those thoughts, but I have witnessed multiple deaths in my family that otherwise still invade my mind at times.
 
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The supermarket near my house recently got a new deli associate. I know this sounds bad but she has the most perfect edible phat ass I have ever seen in my entire life. Oh what I wouldn't give to see the whole thing without pants or undies blocking my view (unfortunately she's sadly married to a guy who looks like what would happen if Chuck Wendig had a baby with Chris-Chan)
 
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Sundae said:
This thread could use some more boobies. Big, beautiful boobs that you just want to reach out and touch, ya know what I mean?

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Good stuff.

Much appreciated!
 
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My sister was in 7-11 and while she was in line she heard something drop on the floor. She looked down and it was a $20 bill. She decided to do the honest thing and give it to the person she thought had dropped it, the guy in front of her. But the guy in the back kept insisting it was his money. So these two dindus start arguing over the $20 bill. They both claim it's theirs. The guy she gave the money to gets in his car and drives off. And the other guy starts yelling at my sister and claiming that she owes him $20. He even followed her for awhile. Now she's afraid he's going to see her around and there will be trouble.

Well somebody was lying. Likely the guy who sped off with the $20.

She should have just kept the money. Or at least put it on the counter and let the employee deal with it.
 
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Dysnomia said:
My sister was in 7-11 and while she was in line she heard something drop on the floor. She looked down and it was a $20 bill. She decided to do the honest thing and give it to the person she thought had dropped it, the guy in front of her. But the guy in the back kept insisting it was his money. So these two dindus start arguing over the $20 bill. They both claim it's theirs. The guy she gave the money to gets in his car and drives off. And the other guy starts yelling at my sister and claiming that she owes him $20. He even followed her for awhile. Now she's afraid he's going to see her around and there will be trouble.

Well somebody was lying. Likely the guy who sped off with the $20.

She should have just kept the money. Or at least put it on the counter and let the employee deal with it.
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Sometimes it's hard making the right decision in these situations, I probably would've went with the counter as well and let them deal with it than try to decide over two people.
 
What exactly did I see at the grocery store the other day? It was a greying, obese dude who visually smelled and stomped his way down the aisles, mantits poking out of his uniform, but he was wearing badly applied makeup and his greasy hair was grown out. Lost a bet? Delusional?
 
My apartment complex is replacing the traditional locks with electronic ones and I'm struggling to understand the rationale for it. What Jewish tricks are they pulling with this unnecessary investment?
 
ForgedBlades said:
My apartment complex is replacing the traditional locks with electronic ones and I'm struggling to understand the rationale for it. What Jewish tricks are they pulling with this unnecessary investment?
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They want to sneak in while you're asleep and fondle your butthole.
 
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Sinners Sandwich said:
Did u guys ever have an emotional painful dream about people that don't exist irl?

I knew these people in my dream and saw them die. I was crying in my dream and now after waking up still feel bad.

Wtf
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I've come pretty damn close to that on a couple of occasions, but nothing too big.
 
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