Megathread The Pooner Zoo - A thread for collecting wild Pooners and posting OC Pooners, and anything Pooner related

[AnOminous]

Once you've done all this, you can start growing a dick in a flower pot.

Why can't FtMs just have a dick grafted on them from a male troon?

 

[Drive-by Farts]

Why can't FtMs just have a dick grafted on them from a male troon?

They don’t cut the dicks off, they splay and invert them like the Viking spread Eagle torture, just on your penis. That’s why kids like Jazz Jennings who were on puberty blockers don’t have enough material to work with and often have significantly worse results. No spare weenies unfortunately.

 

[Chandelier]

... you mean like all yaoi?

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Can't be arsed to check but almost certain that this is a pooner

Yep. She's 15, too. 15 and talks about nothing but BL where no one is darker than a paper bag. The funny thing here is that they can trash this dumb gay love story, but they would never read BL featuring, say, gay niggers. They'll tolerate rape but not THAT kind of rape in their yaoi! Eewwwwwwwwwwwww!

 

[Paper Machete]

I like how pooners and some shipholics think that same sex attracted men are in large numbers wanting fluffy cutesy romances when pretty much all M/M fic and media that isn't straight up live action porn or really weird fetish art is explicitly made for women (except for maybe very serious stuff that focuses on actual history/struggle). I mean it's obvious by the way they act and what sort of things the story focuses on. It actually makes me really frustrated that they don't realize that none of this is representation or stories for gay/bi men. Not the BL, not their niche fics, not the Thai gay dramas...it's made with the knowledge and intention it'll be girls squeeing and uwu over it and yet they act naive and retarded about the fact it exists pretty explicitly to be marketed towards their fetish for such.

"It's like yaoi made by straight people for straight people" yes, honey, that's what all of that shit is.

 

[Hamplanet Fitness]

Pooner calls herself and her ilk "cunty gays", says actual gays are transphobic:


Pooner upset that gay men reject her:


Pooner says people calling her out for fetishizing gay men are transphobic:


Pooner gets told the truth that she's a fetishist, then admits it but doesn't realize she's admitting it:

 

[AnOminous]

They don’t cut the dicks off, they splay and invert them like the Viking spread Eagle torture, just on your penis. That’s why kids like Jazz Jennings who were on puberty blockers don’t have enough material to work with and often have significantly worse results. No spare weenies unfortunately.

Yeah I know that I've been on the horrors thread for a while. I just think it's a funny idea and they should actually do it.

 

[H.P. FuckYou]

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Once you've done all this, you can start growing a dick in a flower pot.

Why the fuck does this rowley jefferson looking-ass jew have five different ads placed on a barley seven minute video

At first I just thought it was because I clicked directly on the link. But literally every single one of this fag's videos has at least four ads minimum

 

[Amber the Hedgehog]

I like how pooners and some shipholics think that same sex attracted men are in large numbers wanting fluffy cutesy romances when pretty much all M/M fic and media that isn't straight up live action porn or really weird fetish art is explicitly made for women

It's seriously so baffling that these girls don't seem to realize that gay men are men. Men don't like the same entertainment as women. Sure there is overlap but there are also genres and styles that overwhelmingly appeal to one sex or the other.

Cutesy romances and emotional dramas are lady things even if all the characters are male. It's exactly the same as bloody tactical action games are dude things even if the fighters are females.

 

[Apustajan apustaja]

Pooner calls herself and her ilk "cunty gays", says actual gays are transphobic:
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Pooner upset that gay men reject her:
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Pooner says people calling her out for fetishizing gay men are transphobic:
View attachment 7721101

Pooner gets told the truth that she's a fetishist, then admits it but doesn't realize she's admitting it:
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Gay men love being fetishised, just not by you, you stupid woman.

"I want you to be into me because I'm ME! Not because I'm a leather daddy and you are a cumslut boot-boy!" said no-one ever.

 

[Among Us Gaming]

> why would you buy sunscreen. . .
Skin cancer. The reason is skin cancer. If you are bald, and outside often, and do not wear sunscreen, you are at an elevated risk of skin cancer.
Yet another example of pooners being real cool masquline doods, and not knowing common sense things about men

 

[Apustajan apustaja]

> why would you buy sunscreen. . .
Skin cancer. The reason is skin cancer. If you are bald, and outside often, and do not wear sunscreen, you are at an elevated risk of skin cancer.
Yet another example of pooners being real cool masquline doods, and not knowing common sense things about men

Leaving to solar panel for the sex machine completly uncovered puts other peoples marriages at risk too.

 

[Surfin Terf]

> why would you buy sunscreen. . .
Skin cancer. The reason is skin cancer. If you are bald, and outside often, and do not wear sunscreen, you are at an elevated risk of skin cancer.
Yet another example of pooners being real cool masquline doods, and not knowing common sense things about men

It was such a bizarre thing to post, like buying slightly overpriced sunscreen is some over-the-top masculine display that she is above. It's not even a real stereotype, men wear less sunscreen than women (and I think we all already knew that, though I did look up the figures and it's about 1:2) and if anything we should wear more than we do.

 

[Dolly Brooks]

It was such a bizarre thing to post, like buying slightly overpriced sunscreen is some over-the-top masculine display that she is above. It's not even a real stereotype, men wear less sunscreen than women (and I think we all already knew that, though I did look up the figures and it's about 1:2) and if anything we should wear more than we do.

Spoiler: Sunscreen

Finding effective sunscreen that doesn’t feel and look like shit is hard, and the best sunscreen is the one you’ll wear regularly, so expensive sunscreen is worth it if you’ll actually use it (and use enough of it for proper coverage.)

I’ve never heard of men spending excess money on sunscreen, let alone special stuff for their bald heads, but I support it.

 

[Hongourable Madisha]

Yeah I know that I've been on the horrors thread for a while. I just think it's a funny idea and they should actually do it.

Trollface madlad surgeon Miroslav Djordjevic did suggest it a few years ago. A sort of donor genitals bank and swap shop.

 

[Among Us Gaming]

I’ve never heard of men spending excess money on sunscreen, let alone special stuff for their bald heads, but I support it.

To be honest most dudes wear a hat to deal with it. The only bald guys I've ever heard using sunscreen are like the health freak types. Otherwise its ballcap or cowboy hat time.

 

[Lord Of Shit]

Confirmed pooner, the BBC just is very heckin respectful of trans folx's pronouns and identities, even if they're planning terrorism.

The BBC has been colonised harder and deeper than anywhere the British Empire ever planted a flag.

Even worse, while there is still occasionally some half-decent in-depth reporting, much of it has become not only Woke nonsense, the rest is rapidly degenerating into click-bait.

This isn't quite OT, but, since it's both troon-and-BBC(in more ways than one; lulz)-related, here, have some rage-bait:

https://www.bbc.com/culture/article/20250731-the-us-statue-at-the-heart-of-a-culture-war

 

[Internet Wizard]

Not the BL, not their niche fics, not the Thai gay dramas...it's made with the knowledge and intention it'll be girls squeeing and uwu over it and yet they act naive and retarded about the fact it exists pretty explicitly to be marketed towards their fetish for such.

This is just what anime is for Mtfs. Unrealistic expectations warp your sense of reality, who knew?
It reminds me of that one pooner cosplayer that gloated abt how well they pulled off looking like Alucard... like duh, you're basically there already. This kind of thing is just telling gay/bi men they can't get on the pooner level because they had the horrible misfortune of being born with functional penises and all that comes with that

 

[Less Nasty Old Person]

Sunscreen fucking sucks. It's either laden with skin irritating mystery chemicals or safe but pasty with a greasy white base that looks like geisha makeup and makes even old lady skin break out in zits. The formula for the chemical stuff keeps evolving as each new miracle chemical is found to be worse for you than the fucking skin cancer. The zinc oxide stuff is harmless but nasty.

If you're allergic to aspirin, that is why regular sunscreen makes your skin feel like it's burning, because #currentyear mystery chemical is salicylates which WILL cross react at recommended SPF levels. Even most hypoallergenic brands have salicylates. Constant inflammation is arguably as bad for you as UV exposure.

If you're white and burn in the sun, do what the world's brown people do, and cover the fuck up. Long sleeves / pants / skirts / big hats / umbrellas keep the browns from getting darker than they already are because light skin is "better" than dark skin. And you know what? Every damn one of them has younger looking skin than you do no matter what age.

These fucking whiboi pooners are too stupid to figure that out.

 

[FarmVille]

Sunscreen fucking sucks. It's either laden with skin irritating mystery chemicals or safe but pasty with a greasy white base that looks like geisha makeup and makes even old lady skin break out in zits. The formula for the chemical stuff keeps evolving as each new miracle chemical is found to be worse for you than the fucking skin cancer. The zinc oxide stuff is harmless but nasty.

If you're allergic to aspirin, that is why regular sunscreen makes your skin feel like it's burning, because #currentyear mystery chemical is salicylates which WILL cross react at recommended SPF levels. Even most hypoallergenic brands have salicylates. Constant inflammation is arguably as bad for you as UV exposure.

If you're white and burn in the sun, do what the world's brown people do, and cover the fuck up. Long sleeves / pants / skirts / big hats / umbrellas keep the browns from getting darker than they already are because light skin is "better" than dark skin. And you know what? Every damn one of them has younger looking skin than you do no matter what age.

These fucking whiboi pooners are too stupid to figure that out.

Total ignorance of fancy sunscreens = this poster 100% biological male confirmed

 

[Volcanic Viper]

This is your brain on yaoi. The bio:

View attachment 7707257

How does one write all this bullshit out willingly and not realize they're completely fucked in the head?