Disaster ‘Velma’ Is So Bad It's Spawned Psyop Conspiracy Theories

‘Velma’ Is So Bad It's Spawned Psyop Conspiracy Theories

archived 14 Jan 2023 17:10:03 UTC

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‘Velma’ Is So Bad It's Spawned Psyop Conspiracy Theories

People are certainly talking about Velma, that much is true. Just…not very positively. Velma currently has the lowest audience score I’ve seen for an HBO or HBO Max production, a 7%. To get that low requires not just “review bombing” but your show also likely has to be…genuinely bad.

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‘Velma’ Is So Bad It's Spawned Psyop Conspiracy Theories​

Paul Tassi
Senior Contributor
News and opinion about video games, television, movies and the internet.
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Jan 14, 2023, 10:20am EST
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Velma
HBO MAX
Yesterday, HBO Max bragged that Velma, the new adult-rated Scooby Doo cartoon, was its most-viewed animated premiere ever. I’m not sure precisely what that says, given that the only other Max original animated series I can even think of is Harley Quinn, plus a bunch of other older series that WB Discovery recently murdered.


But people are certainly talking about Velma, that much is true. Just…not very positively. Velma currently has the lowest audience score I’ve seen for an HBO or HBO Max production, a 7%. To get that low requires not just “review bombing” but your show also likely has to be…genuinely bad.

And it is. Velma is very, very bad.

Velma is so bad in fact, that it’s spawning conspiracy theories that creator Mindy Kaling made what is essentially a parody of what the right wing thinks left wing comedy is like. As in, a show that not just recast most roles with new races, but also features loads and loads of “white guys, amiright?” jokes. The idea is that Kaling is a secretly conservative force in media trying to make the left look bad by making a cringey adult cartoon full of “this rich white guy has a small dong” jokes that the right can point at as everything wrong with race-recasted, social justice-influenced media.


I do not want to go down a big rabbit hole about Mindy Kaling’s personal beliefs and influences here. And yet if that wasn’t the intent of the show, it sure feels like it in practice. On one side, it absolutely is working to spark mockery from the right, exactly as you might imagine it would. But on the other, it’s just not defensible at all by those who would normally welcome a progressive series.


Take She-Hulk for example. That was a hugely controversial show where it was very explicit about roasting misogynistic comic fans, perhaps often lacking in subtlety. But I would still very much defend that show, as I think its humor and fourth-wall breaking works, and most of the people who were upset about it are the very people that it’s overtly making fun of…for being upset about it.

Velma is not that. Velma is not defensible by any stretch of the imagination. It’s just bad. Making progressive jokes is fine so long as the jokes are good. They are not good. I heard the show described somewhere as a series written by TV writers who only ever talk to other TV writers. That’s a pretty good summary. And the idea here is that it’s so, so bad at landing its jabs at right wingers that it almost feels like self-sabotage.

There is a world in which this concept might have worked. I can see an “adult” Scooby Doo series where you have an overlooked Velma attempting to claw back credit from a privileged Fred, the “leader” of the gang. And yet here it’s not just jabbing at Fred for being an overconfident white dude, it’s literally “he’s such a whiny white man baby that his mommy cuts his steak and he hasn’t finished puberty so he has a small penis.” Like just…no remote hint of subtlety or nuance or anything that could make the progressive humor work.
An easy counter-example to turn to is the R-rated Harley Quinn series, also on HBO Max, which still feels true to the characters it focuses on, is full of left-leaning messaging on misogyny an LGBTQ issues, but importantly…is funny and compelling. I mean, this show recently did a full bit about the Joker running for mayor as a progressive socialist and it worked.
Velma? I don’t know what Velma is doing. I’m not sure I subscribe to this “Mindy Kaling made a dogwhistle series for right wing trolls” theory, as the Occam’s Razor explanation is that the show is just…bad. The jokes are…bad. That’s really it.
I may continue watching out of morbid fascination, but man, this is truly one of the most bizarre things I’ve ever seen.

 

[Absurdist Laughter]

I highly doubt that. It's just a bad show, man.

It's shockingly, almost impressively, bad. I watched the first couple episodes and although some jokes got me, most of the content is as fun as having a metal baseball bat slammed against the temple. It is nothing but self insertion fantasy and Leftist "bible beating".

 

[Iron Jaguar]

"That's exactly why we want to produce this play. To show the world the true Hitler, the Hitler you loved, the Hitler you knew, the Hitler with a song in his heart."

"I do hate myself but it has nothing to do with being Jewish."

 

[Hitman One]

Her and Daphne make out at some point. Not-Shaggy watches them

This sounds like some weird lost episode from the 1960s created when someone cooked LSD into the pot brownies.

 

[Hitman One]

Who the fuck keeps hiring this Mindy chick? She was not funny on the Office. She was woefully bad to Its Always Sunny in that one episode she was in. How does she keep getting jobs? Does she have dirt on EVERYONE?

She was pretty inoffensive in The Good Place but Ted Dansen carried that show.

OK it was some other Indian woman but whatever.

 

[Picnic_Boy]

I love how she went to Scooby Doo and not one of the many many HB knockoffs.

Jabberjaw, Josie and the Pussycats, Captain Caveman, Funky Phantom, The Amazing Chan Clan. Could have taken a shit on any of these (Josie had them beat by 23 years) but chose the one with the dog.

I would love to an attempt to remake Captain Caveman without Captain Caveman. Really. It would just be teenagers walking into walls and eating sandwiches.

 

[Super-Chevy454]

I would love to an attempt to remake Captain Caveman without Captain Caveman. Really. It would just be teenagers walking into walls and eating sandwiches.

As long as they don't turned these teenagers into the fat Gillette girl.

 

[ZehnBoat]

This is just what happens when you throw money at undeserving talentless hacks solely on the basis of "brown" and "vagina".

for years it's been "shut up and consoom current year thing, consoom POC things, consoom wamminz thing. who cares if it's just one person's mindlessly angry shit fit, just consoooooom"
but now this one doesn't also fall in line with SJWs, suddenly edgy cynical shit isn't good for them?

 

[DankSmoker]

If they're going this route it would actually make a lot more sense for Scooby to be a black man and the two have a homosexual relationship. That's how fucked up and bizarre this all is. I'd rather have those two in a gay relationship because Scooby as a black woman is infinitely more fucked up than Scooby as a black man.

...Wait a minute, there is something obvious we should have already considered.
Scooby troony doo(d)

 

[Ahriman]

 

[Sprocket]

I gave the first episode look to see what all the fuss is about. I'll admit, I did laugh at the two cockroaches bonking. That was the only scene that made laugh, though. It wasn't that I didn't get the jokes. I understood all the punch lines, but they were all retarded and simply not funny.

The woke in it was a bit strange. It wasn't subliminal or on the sly as usually found in garbage like this. It didn't quite come across like one character telling another character "white people bad", the tone and flow of the lines and how they fit in the scenes came across more as if the voice actors were directly talking to the viewers. It was direct, blunt and in your face. So much so, that in the back of your mind you start wondering if the writers weren't playing Poe's law and you're watching satire about woke retards produced purely to troll Mindy Kaling.

I honestly can't tell who this is written for.

 

[NyQuilninja]

I gave the first episode look to see what all the fuss is about. I'll admit, I did laugh at the two cockroaches bonking. That was the only scene that made laugh, though. It wasn't that I didn't get the jokes. I understood all the punch lines, but they were all retarded and simply not funny.

The woke in it was a bit strange. It wasn't subliminal or on the sly as usually found in garbage like this. It didn't quite come across like one character telling another character "white people bad", the tone and flow of the lines and how they fit in the scenes came across more as if the voice actors were directly talking to the viewers. It was direct, blunt and in your face. So much so, that in the back of your mind you start wondering if the writers weren't playing Poe's law and you're watching satire about woke retards produced purely to troll Mindy Kaling.

I honestly can't tell who this is written for.

Yeah, there's a weird disconnect with some of the writing, especially with Mindy. It's like the insults are directed towards the viewer, not just whatever random character she's shitting all over. It's hard to describe. It's almost like you're the butt of the joke for watching this. Either way it's off putting

 

[pikachudidnothingwrong]

Just going to drop this here:

At Crystal Cove High School, Daphne (Constance Wu) is a popular mean girl orphan who deals drugs because of a dark family secret. Her boyfriend Fred (Glenn Howerton) personifies mediocre white richness. His mansion holds a dark secret — and he has teeny widdle privates, a subject of much conversation. "Shaggy" has become Norville (Sam Richardson), a school-newspaper striver friendzoned by his beloved Velma. He worries he's a beta male; remember that lame humor concept from 20 years ago?

So to recap:

Velma - ugly, unlikable, unfunny, boring, horny and also an indian and lesbian now for some reason
Daphne - drug pushing bitch, also asian and a lesbian now apparently
Fred - only white character, rich DB, has small penis
Shaggy - now has a new name, interests and personality... is also now black and a beta SIMP

Also no fucking dogs anywhere!


Who the fuck is this for?! Even ReeeeERA mostly hates it and calls it out for so clearly being little more than outrage bait.

 

[Norbert the Tiger]

It is now 1.4 on IMDb. By this barometer, which is admittedly imperfect, Velma could well be the worst show of all time. The rating may continue to drop as well.

 

[Starved Artist]

View attachment 4285139

I only watch shows because nobody can be trusted to review anything honestly anymore. Movie reviews are cucked. I watched Aux Aeterna expecting less than nothing and got visually assaulted by stobe effects for 15 minutes, meanwhile the movie has an amazingly high rating for no reason at all.

Video game reviews gloss over issues that kick you in the teeth like how Callisto Protocol and Pokemon Scarlet glossed over the horrendous pop-in and graphical issues that shouldn't exist in 2022.

Book reviews are shallow and exclude things that you should be aware of.. Like the writer not using a thesaurus or having the compositional skills of a 4th grader.

Movies are reviewed by what can only be described as castrated lobotomy victims. They can't tell you if the move invoked any emotions or if the soundtrack was decent ( hell most can't remember the music from any movie they've seen in the last three years), they can't comment on the camera angles, they won't absorb the things you might be interested in. Just spoil the story, spoil the twist and go "hoh hum, it's not like formulaic movie # 45, so it sucks". Don't even get me started on any of the actually controversial films. People will form their entire opinion of a movie based off of 20 second clip from the last 3 minutes of the movie, taken out of context and then parrot it around the internet and media sites like it's an accurate description of the film.

TV shows are reviewed by people who didn't finish them or just watched 10 random minutes of someone elses' video OR people who just actively hate the show. Which leaves a lot of room for paid reviewers and the faux hype machine to keep the show running forever. Money Laundering is huge since some shows are actively being designed to fail and they get kick-backs and tax rebates for it.

Adaptations of video games are judged by people who are faux-fans or passing fans, not the die hard hardcore nerds who actually want something new. Oh no, it's the nerds that want the same story told infinitely.

So yeah, I believe it's bad. But I'm going to judge how bad it is for myself.

 

[Mr. Bung]

Also no fucking dogs anywhere!

Scooby has already been introduced for future episodes as a black woman that's an online food critic influencer or some shit. Gets into a relationship with Shaggy and may actually be a troon but no one is sure about that part yet.

 

[Computer Guardian]

Looks like Famed Brony MisAnthroPony "Zaid Magenta" who did some gay shit to somebody else and made him quit the internet over it is bringing his take on Velma, becuase the grifters don't stop coming in to get thier fill of the show.

 

[Zero Day Defense]

Shaggy - now has a new name, interests and personality... is also now black and a beta SIMP

And a cuck, seeing as he walked in on Velma and Daphne kissing.

But, no, Norville was always his given name. It's just that until now, it was literal trivia because the Mystery Gang 1) existed and 2) was comprised of friends familiar with each other.

 

[NyQuilninja]

I only watch shows because nobody can be trusted to review anything honestly anymore. Movie reviews are cucked. I watched Aux Aeterna expecting less than nothing and got visually assaulted by stobe effects for 15 minutes, meanwhile the movie has an amazingly high rating for no reason at all.

Video game reviews gloss over issues that kick you in the teeth like how Callisto Protocol and Pokemon Scarlet glossed over the horrendous pop-in and graphical issues that shouldn't exist in 2022.

Book reviews are shallow and exclude things that you should be aware of.. Like the writer not using a thesaurus or having the compositional skills of a 4th grader.

Movies are reviewed by what can only be described as castrated lobotomy victims. They can't tell you if the move invoked any emotions or if the soundtrack was decent ( hell most can't remember the music from any movie they've seen in the last three years), they can't comment on the camera angles, they won't absorb the things you might be interested in. Just spoil the story, spoil the twist and go "hoh hum, it's not like formulaic movie # 45, so it sucks". Don't even get me started on any of the actually controversial films. People will form their entire opinion of a movie based off of 20 second clip from the last 3 minutes of the movie, taken out of context and then parrot it around the internet and media sites like it's an accurate description of the film.

TV shows are reviewed by people who didn't finish them or just watched 10 random minutes of someone elses' video OR people who just actively hate the show. Which leaves a lot of room for paid reviewers and the faux hype machine to keep the show running forever. Money Laundering is huge since some shows are actively being designed to fail and they get kick-backs and tax rebates for it.

Adaptations of video games are judged by people who are faux-fans or passing fans, not the die hard hardcore nerds who actually want something new. Oh no, it's the nerds that want the same story told infinitely.

So yeah, I believe it's bad. But I'm going to judge how bad it is for myself.

Well good luck with that. I tried.
If you want to know the emotions that evoked in me, sure confusion and anger.. I was confused as to why I am bothering to watch any of this and what the tone of the show was. Anger because at some point I just couldn't go forward. The animation seem typical. Not bad, not great The dialogue? Well that's another story. What little remains of characters are really background props for Mindy to unleash her inner slay queen on. I think that's what the kids are calling it.
As for the humor as this is labeled as a comedy. Might as well be summed up as a Amy Schumer special at best. There are times I'm watching it and I'm like okay. This is adult themed I think and then they do something outrageously childish it makes you think you're watching something from the early 00s.
The show in a lot of ways reminds me of Jellystone. However, that show was a manic mess. I don't think they went out of their way to intentionally insult the viewers. It was just annoying

 

[TowinKarz]

"That's exactly why we want to produce this play. To show the world the true Hitler, the Hitler you loved, the Hitler you knew, the Hitler with a song in his heart."

What if the real journey was the Hitlers we helped rise to power along the way?

 

[DankSmoker]

She was pretty inoffensive in The Good Place but Ted Dansen carried that show.

That's because it was a different actress.