Warhammer's biggest wanker, Guy from Midwinter Minis has made a little video, something of a 'state of the union address' with regard to a number of topics, or, as Guy himself describes it, in his typically cloying, smarmy, pretending-to-be-your-bezzie-mate style. 'a good ol' chat about lots of interesting topics in this chilled, casual channel update'.
The vibes are off.
He starts by giving us an update as to the fate of his 'body horror land raider', a model that he once braggadociously referred to as 'one of the most famous and recognisable Warhammer conversions in the world', and that he refers to in this video as 'one of the most infamous Warhammer models out there'.
Guy, if you're reading this - this is a converted Nurgle predator, made by David Soper.
All of the detail on it was painstakingly sculpted by hand, out of green stuff. It's also quite lovely and I love his cheery little grin. It has appeared multiple times in White Dwarf, as well as several
official Warhammer army books, including, I believe, the much-beloved blue 'How To Paint Citadel Miniatures' book from the '90s. It also won the Slayer Sword and gold at Golden Daemon in 1990. Your land raider, by comparison, has not won such accolades.
You literally even uploaded a video to your YouTube channel of it, a month ago, failing to do so.
Now, I'm admittedly not any kind of Warhammer authority, but if I had to pick out a miniature that could be accurately described as 'one of the most famous and instantly recognisable Warhammer conversions ever', there's only one Nurgle tank that I'd be picking, and it wouldn't be the one with a load of craft store cabochons and plastic, Chinese sweatshop-made Incredible Hulk arms hotglued onto it.
Anyway, Guy informs us that 'despite some impotent rage from Reddit' it wasn't a scam, and was in fact, won by literally the saddest family in the entire world, who got into Warhammer during the pandemic and all claim to be Midwinter Minis super-fans. If I were Guy, I probably wouldn't have included the bit with the teenage daughter talking about 'fingering the butthole', but y'know, different strokes for different folks.
I also wonder whether the wife just, by sheer happenstance, was wearing her favourite 'Midwinter Minis' T-shirt when he dropped by, or whether Guy, known egomaniac, brought it with him and told her to wear it for the video. I don't know about you, but I have my theories. Honestly, the whole interaction between him, Hattie and the winner and his wife has an uncomfortable, unspoken 'swinger's party' vibe to it that I do not like.
Guy also whines about being snubbed by Games Workshop, after Battletech gave him a load of free stuff and slobbered all over his balls at a convention. 'I've made over 200 videos on GW products over six years and they don't even give me the courtesy of responding to my e-mails'. As if they fucking owe him something. I would like to point out that in this very video, Guy has previously recommended a dragon miniature from a company called Dungeons and Lasers, on the grounds of it being far cheaper than Games Workshop's cheapest dragon and of about equivalent quality.
Hmm. I fucking wonder why Games Workshop wouldn't want to do business with you, Guy. It is a mystery.
We also learn that Guy drives an electric car and that Hattie is a Disney adult. Because of course he does, the ponce, and of course she is, the basic bitch. I get the feeling that Guy doesn't like a partner that challenges him intellectually, but that's just conjecture on my part. You went from 'a doctor' to 'a Disney girlie'.
Heartbreakingly, for anyone hoping for an upcoming 'Midwinter Minis - homelessness arc', Guy has also informed us that his landlady has agreed to give him a further two years on his tenancy, so we sha'n't be seeing videos with clickbait titles like, "Can I REALLY paint a Start Collecting box with only free sachets of ketchup from McDonalds and my own piss and tears?"
The undisputed highlight of the video, though, is when he channels his inner deputy head schoolteacher and gives all us meanie trolls a good telling off.
I'm a big fan of the 'stupid rumours and spreading of harmful misinformation' line, because to me, it seems like the obvious way he could debooonk all these so-called stupid rumours and all this harmful misinformation, would be by being open and transparent. He could post the DMs between him and Hattie and him and that tranny, Dana Howl, and show that it was all entirely on the up-and-up, and there was nothing sleazy or incriminating about them whatsoever.
The fact that he doesn't, and in fact, doesn't seek to explain the situation any further at all is sus as fuck. I mean, I know people are entitled to their private lives, but if you're a public figure, you kind of make that sort of stuff
public, especially when you separate from your wife and kids, whom you've plastered all over your YouTube channel, and then, five minutes later, some new bitch pops up with no explanation whatsoever.
I wish Penny would be like Count Dankula's ex and come out and say, "Yeah, he did this, this and this," but she's decided to remain silent. The fact of the matter is that the timeline we have shows Guy leaving his wife, while she was pregnant with their twins - something that is statisically quite common with narcissistic men (although trooning out is more
de rigueur now), when they realise they will no longer be the centre of attention in their woman's life - and then along comes Hattie with no explanation. She doesn't really make a big contribution to the channel, and her painting, while serviceable (and certainly a lot better than Guy's) isn't really anything to write home about. What do you expect people to think?
I dunno, man, if you want to talk about disgusting, morally abhorrent behaviour...
