What crime did the person above you commit?

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Contempt of court for giggling and drinking a fifth while saying she pleads the fifth
 
Creating an offensive videogame, then raping someone with it.
 
Stalking Cathy Guisewite and stealing underwear off her clothesline for nefarious fap related purposes.
 
Stole a submarine to go into the Marianas Trench to set the world record for the deepest hentai fap
 
Gave R. Kelly a gold shower, inspiring him to give away free gold showers to the first 100 underage girls he sees.
 
Robbed a liquor store by brandishing a very irate mountain lion.
 
Went on a killing spree after being driven mad by trying to beat Zak McKracken & the Alien Mindbenders with no help whatsoever
 
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