What does Chris expect from life?

[Some JERK]

The way I see it, what may have happened is that Chris has found it increasingly harder to satisfy his immediate wants after graduating high school since others were no longer willing to provide for him. He had long figured that that open-armed compassion was coming someday, but the last couple of years have probably made it pretty clear to him that society doesn't care too much about him, nor for him. Regardless, wandering around town in a state of emotional neediness and fishing for pity is all Chris knows how to do, so he continues doing it for lack of a better idea.

His major downturn was when he toddled out into society with his "i am awesome and cool and if you say otherwise you are wrong and bad. Now gimme!"-attitude that he learned from Borb. He was told his entire life that he was special and handsome, that people basically owed him love and understanding, and above all, that they weren't allowed to be mean to him. When reality proved otherwise, he tried to push back against it, and got smacked down hard. Teaching him how to handle setbacks would be admitting to him that he isn't a flawless, special snowflake. The end result is that he has zero ability to deal with his current reality or make any plans to change it, since the problem as he sees it is with everyone else (including God) and therefore completely out of his control.

 

[Tubular Monkey]

One of the things that I've often wondered is what Chris would do if all his stupidly unrealistic life expectations come true?

That's an easy one. He'd bitch. Chris doesn't even realize it, but he is programmed to be unhappy and expect more. He literally cannot be satisfied or content. He will be miserable for the rest of his life. He blames it on having his dreams being unfulfilled, but even if they were, he'd be miserable. "SONICHU, I AM GODDAMN SICK AND TIRED OF YOU BRINGING ME THE SAME BEST CANDY EVER AND PRETTY GIRLS! AND MY VIDEO GAME IS BORING NOW! "

 

[Some JERK]

One of the things that I've often wondered is what Chris would do if all his stupidly unrealistic life expectations come true?

That's an easy one. He'd bitch. Chris doesn't even realize it, but he is programmed to be unhappy and expect more. He literally cannot be satisfied or content. He will be miserable for the rest of his life. He blames it on having his dreams being unfulfilled, but even if they were, he'd be miserable. "SONICHU, I AM GODDAMN SICK AND TIRED OF YOU BRINGING ME THE SAME BEST CANDY EVER AND PRETTY GIRLS! AND MY VIDEO GAME IS BORING NOW! "

I swear that some people are actually addicted to anger and negativity. It's like heroin for them. They simply cannot "function" unless they have someone to be angry with or blame for something.

 

[Sweet and Savoury]

Well Chris biggest issue (IMHO) is that he was never taught what happiness is and that being happy isn't a given its something you have to work towards and earn.

Like everyone else has said he expects life to just hand him everything he wants not understand that earning something is almost if not more important then having it. On his side a lot of normal folks of his generation suffrage from the same issue. Which like Chrissy is a fault of his parents more then himself.

Now get off my lawn you darn kids!

 

[Kyoosand]

I don't exactly mean "What he thinks life should give him" but I mean "What does he honestly expect day by day?"

Well that's the thing you see. What Chris expects day by day IS what he thinks life should give him.


What does Chris expect from life? Well, it's pretty obvious:

-- Everyone on Earth to own every issue of Sonichu

-- Everyone to be his butler or concubine

-- Boyfriends are banned

-- To live in a mansion where everything is paid in full by others. Soup hotels for everyone else.

-- Anyone who dares to defy him is immediately arrested and tried in a kangaroo court, followed with death by electrocution

-- No homehseshyooels allowed on the Planet Earth

-- His beloved Daughter/Twin Sister (don't ask) Crystal (whom someone else will bathe and change and feed, of course)

-- All females must be pleasing to the eyes and be totally boyfriend free, and be available to serve whenever Chris is feeling horny

-- Eat only the GOOD FOOD

-- To have the High School reunion that was BASICALLY PROMISED! Where all his former gal-pals would be in awe of him and totally not creeped out and saying "OMG! That's Chris? I knew he was a weirdo but I don't remember him being this bad! Do we have Security at this event in case Chris goes crazy?"

-- Mexicans to scrap Mexican Flag Day and celebrate Christian Love Day. In fact, ALL of Humanity is to celebrate CLD, OR ELSE!!!!


In short, Chris wants to be King Joffrey.

 

[Mayor McCheese]

He wants to be rich without realising it.

If he was a millionaire he wouldn't need to work, worry about bills, make barb happy, could distract himself with all the little toys he wants and just hire boatloads of hookers and hanger-ons to praise him and give him sex when he wants or pay some poor desperate women to have his kid like Michael Jackson used to.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Brother, he expects life to cater to him instead of the other way around. Chris wants to become the Hulkster without the training, prayers and vitamins.

 

[butt in trouble]

Chris expects and prefers people to do things for him regardless of how he treats them. I mean he expected us to troll someone he personally disliked and track down one of his old gal-pals for him.

Chris wants to do things for him not out of a sense of obligation but out of pity. Chris loves the attention that comes along with being the victim.

 

[Anchuent Christory]

One of the things that I've often wondered is what Chris would do if all his stupidly unrealistic life expectations come true?

That's an easy one. He'd bitch. Chris doesn't even realize it, but he is programmed to be unhappy and expect more. He literally cannot be satisfied or content. He will be miserable for the rest of his life. He blames it on having his dreams being unfulfilled, but even if they were, he'd be miserable. "SONICHU, I AM GODDAMN SICK AND TIRED OF YOU BRINGING ME THE SAME BEST CANDY EVER AND PRETTY GIRLS! AND MY VIDEO GAME IS BORING NOW! "

I swear that some people are actually addicted to anger and negativity. It's like heroin for them. They simply cannot "function" unless they have someone to be angry with or blame for something.

I've known people like this, and what I always say is "they're only happy when they're miserable"

 

[BigAltheGreat921]

Well Chris biggest issue (IMHO) is that he was never taught what happiness is and that being happy isn't a given its something you have to work towards and earn.

Like everyone else has said he expects life to just hand him everything he wants not understand that earning something is almost if not more important then having it. On his side a lot of normal folks of his generation suffrage from the same issue. Which like Chrissy is a fault of his parents more then himself.

Now get off my lawn you darn kids!

Money sure doesn't buy happiness. But Chris, like many people, has bought into that claim.

 

[Kosher Dill]

I think what he's expecting is: As he sits in one of his usual hangouts that he hasn't been banned from yet, a 18-(current age) boyfriend-free girl notices him, likes him, and makes the first move. Third date, sex, marriage, escape from Barb, live happily ever after playing vidya. That's pretty much it. I think the sweetheart sagas showed pretty conclusively that he has no specific hopes or ambitions for life beyond that vague outline - especially now that Sonichu is as dead as Sonic.

 

[LordCustos3]

Q: What does Chris expect from life?
A: Godhood.

 

[Jackolantern]

I don't think Chris will ever be happy but for him to be content, he doesn't really need much.
His needs are quite few. He doesn't smoke, do drugs, wear expensive clothes, travel, eat or drink fancy or anything like that. Vidya is pretty much his only real major expense. All he wants is to sit around playing vidya, eating Q-sands and get the occasional bit of social interaction. definitely doesn't help (I strongly think she has a borderline personality disorder) and he's incapable of living by himself.
He could quite easily achieve this in a group home, if he had a tolerant nurse or someone to occasionally be nice to him. Then he could wallow quite safely in his own filth.

So yeah, I think being content is as much Chris could hope for. But he could quite easily achieve this if he got his arse into gear.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

I think he's finally realised that Sonichu is not going to make him the millions he hoped for, but at the same time, he expects the rest of the world to fix the mess that is his life. Money troubles? Ask for donations. No friends? Whine until someone takes pity. I think he almost misses the trolls - these posts about getting Megan to apologise and shouting defiance at the trolls scream "plea for attention."

 

[Marvin]

Chris expects and prefers people to do things for him regardless of how he treats them. I mean he expected us to troll someone he personally disliked and track down one of his old gal-pals for him.

Chris wants to do things for him not out of a sense of obligation but out of pity. Chris loves the attention that comes along with being the victim.

Heh, well, whenever Chris wants us to troll people, it's because he believes we're like a lake full of piranha and will troll to shreds anything that's alive and dangled in front of our faces. He doesn't realize we fuck with him because he's weird and funny. He thinks it's because Mimms and Lucas just happened to give the troll-piranha a victim.

I don't know about the pity thing. I think it's more that pity is just one of Chris' tools. Chris is constantly using pity nowadays because, well, his life is shit, so it's his most effective tool nowadays. I don't think if Chris had his pre-troll life he'd still be relying on pity as much as he does nowadays.

Money sure doesn't buy happiness. But Chris, like many people, has bought into that claim.

I never got this saying. Like, sure, while literally, yes, money doesn't buy happiness. But it buys everything else you'd need in life to live comfortably and those things can all assist you in acquiring the things that would make you happy in life. Money lubricates acquiring happiness in life.

... and he's incapable of living by himself.
He could quite easily achieve this in a group home, if he had a tolerant nurse or someone to occasionally be nice to him. Then he could wallow quite safely in his own filth.

Well, with Rocky's help he could live by himself. And the problem with the group home idea is that group homes cost money. I don't know (but I'm not an expert on this, so, whichever) if he could afford that.

 

[Judge Holden]

China.

 

[Grey]

Q: What does Chris expect from life?
A: Godhood.

That, or to be the One True Leader of Planet Earth (read: Dictator).

I think he's finally realised that Sonichu is not going to make him the millions he hoped for, but at the same time, he expects the rest of the world to fix the mess that is his life. Money troubles? Ask for donations. No friends? Whine until someone takes pity. I think he almost misses the trolls - these posts about getting Megan to apologise and shouting defiance at the trolls scream "plea for attention."

Oh, most certainly IMO. The trolls gave him something to be mad about; an enemy to scream at and blame for everything. They interrupted his otherwise boring life of eating, sleeping and vidya, and we all see now where that lifestyle, uninterrupted, is getting him. In short, I seriously think the trolling was good for him, at least in some ways. It gave him something to expect from life.

 

[PCA]

It's always someone else's fault. Just look at how he blamed Keurig for the house fire, and the firemen who saved his life for stealing Barb's possessions.

When did Chris blame the firemen for stealing his mother's stuff? I must have missed this.

 

[Pikonic]

Everything for Nothing

 

[CatParty]

He shits himself. He shouldn't expect much, but he does