What food makes your poo the worst?

Cooked Cheese. I'm not lactose intolerant and can drink milk, eat yogurt etc with no issue but cheese that has been cooked is like hell to me. The obsession over it repulses me on an instinctive level and seeing pizza pulls with gloopy cheese etc is my idea of gross.

Weird enough, it doesn't seem to be the case with raw cheese - but the only raw cheese I eat is cheddar because I grew up with it and find other cheese to taste awful.

I can digest it but what comes out the other end of the pipe resembles more Wendy's chilli than a healthy log.
 
I'm a fan of very hot spicy food (like a vindaloo or chilli masala, or just a doner kebab with hot chilli sauce). After a boozy night out I know my arsehole will suffer the morning after, but that is just a tactic of spreading pain from the hungover head to the bumhole and ayuverdic medicine means the pain is halved.
It is also actually drunken greed and slobber chops.
Now that is normally a one or two splatter toilet pan incident and done and over with when elevenses come around.
One thing I can't fathom is Korean Samyang 2x Spicy Buldak. It is insanely hot but doesn't appear to have any normal red chilli in it, instead some brown sauce.
Nobody I know except for grifting youtubers like Emmymade can eat this shit sensibly.
It is not the fact it is stupidly tongue burning, but it actually fucks up my intestines. Every single time. I can't shit, I have stomach aches. I can only squirt out a bit of shit at a time. I can only imagine my intestines are all inflamed.
I've tried it at least 10 times for science and I am always blocked up, stomach pain, for days at a time.
What is in that disgusting brown Korean sauce sachet that does this to me when nothing else does?
 
I don't remember the last time I've had food poisoning.
I don't eat goyslop and don't eat food made by hands browner than mine, so it's always safe.

If I had to put a guess I would say that spices I'm not used to are always a safe bet if I want my digestive system to flush it all. I'm fine with even strong Japanese curry though.
 
Tangentially related but I was out shopping today and stopped in the store bathroom to take a leak.

In the lone stall someone had left a log sitting in the toilet that I shit you not was a good 18" long and as thick as my wrist. it looked like a horse had taken a shit in there. It was like something from a South Park episode. It took (11) attempts to flush the damn thing.

I don't even understand how that's possible unless the individual in question was like 8' tall. I am not a small person but an object like that would tear me in half
 
Hard spirits... anything above 60% makes my poo smell and look strange.
I get around that most of the year by mixing it 50/50 with red currant juice. fruity sour is perfect for high proof alcohol for some reason.
 
Too much fibrous veggies with not enough water do pretty wretched things to my insides the next day. Beans also give me trouble, my mom used to make big pots of chili for dinner so we'd have leftovers for lunch- or rather *I'd* have leftovers because no one else will eat leftovers. After about 4 days of chili my colon is crying out for mercy and my butthole is so raw it's bleeding. I love my mom, but not her chili!

Ice cream. Gave it up years ago because of how bad it seems to be for my entire gut to ass system.
Strangely, ice cream seems to help if I've had some stomach issues. I think that it's because dairy often has a constipating effect so if I'm having issues of the opposite sort, then the dairy helps balance it out.
 
Wine makes me violently ill. Foods with too much fat in them will also make me pretty sick.
 
When I've been eating nothing but peanuts, walnuts, cashews, pistachios, almonds and nothing else for an entire day. The day after is not that bad just weird and slightly unsettling, shitting is like hitting the jackpot on a slot machine.
 
For me it's whenever I eat to much of something with alot of fiber like bran muffins
The stool could be used as a strong adhesive it's so sticky.
 
  • Horrifying
Reactions: Local Fed
Back