Containment What If?

[AgentYoshida4444]

What if Chris was the lead singer of Nirvana?

 

[Woodcutting bot]

What if Chris was the lead singer of Nirvana?

We could look forward to his hit singles:

"Smells like wee.n spirit"
"About a boyfriend-free girl"

and of course "Dumb"

 

[Chrisology1337]

What if Chris did a cover of "We are Number One" and Stefan Stefanson (the actor who played Robbie Rotten) saw it?

 

[CWCissey]

What if Chris did a cover of "We are Number One" and Stefan Stefanson (the actor who played Robbie Rotten) saw it?

Stefan would pray for his cancer to give him sweet death quicker.

 

[Apocalypso]

What if Chris

Spoiler

kidnapped @Karen Riley (or one of the admins/mods) and held her hostage until the Kiwi Farms was shut down?

 

[LadyMayhem]

What if your name was Christine Chandler and every time people Googled you they got info about Chris. I wonder if it's ever caused anyone trouble...

 

[AgentYoshida4444]

What if Chris would fall through the rotten floor of his rotting house, under which he finds the Holiest Sword Ever, a penis-shaped sword with the entire Bible engraved on it in all caps Comic Sans, made of solid gold?

 

[JTRH-NBR]

What if every mundane thing you said or did, on the internet and real life, was presented and discussed in great detail on an online forum and then archived into a convenient online encyclopedia by an active group of stalkers?

 

[Apocalypso]

What if Chris would fall through the rotten floor of his rotting house, under which he finds the Holiest Sword Ever, a penis-shaped sword with the entire Bible engraved on it in all caps Comic Sans, made of solid gold?

He'd sell it for Legos.

 

[Chrisology1337]

What if Chris comes home from Bronycon to find Barb dead?

 

[Apocalypso]

What if Chris comes home from Bronycon to find Barb dead?

Obvious. He'd shit himself and do nothing.

 

[DICKPICSRUS]

What if Chris got into Lolita fashion ?

 

[normankrasner]

what if Chris(tine) skipped Bronycon to counter protest the nazis in Cville?

 

[Flowers For Sonichu]

What if Chris lived in a psychedelic fairy tale forest?

You know what kind of forest I mean: weird colorful mushrooms growing all over, fairies of the naked-girl-with-butterfly-wings type zipping about, talking animals who speak in brainfuck riddles and paradoxes, everything ruled by weird non-Euclidean geometries (e.g. a wood path that appears to run straight suddenly curves into a Moebius strip), trees have faces, flowers grow incredibly high, the sky sparkles with colorful fractals etc.

How would Chris fare if he was a resident of such a forest? In what kind of mushroom would he live? How would he get along with the cute nubile fairies, the paradox-talking animals, the non-Euclidean geometries etc.?

He would probably get hungry and eat some fucked up mushrooms that made him shit himself

What if Chris was in a resident evil game?

He'd hang out in his room mass debating with a thumb up his ass

What if Chris was shitting himself at this very moment?

He would have a very unpleasant car ride back home

What if Chris is right behind you?

I would ask him if he would like a refreshing beverage

What if you had the powers of God (Ala Bruce Almighty) and you could command Chris to do something?? Would you make his life better for his own good, troll him, make him create more youtube videos, etc.

I'd make him knock off the tranny shit

He probably is.

---

What if Chris decided he wanted to become a private investigator?

He'd fail because I think in many states u can't have a criminal record

What if Chris shaved his head/got a mullet?

He still wouldn't be able to get laid

What if Ran Coleman Yeatts was CWC's real father? DykesDykesChina's avatar shows that CWC indeed looks like Ran Coleman Yeatts.

Barb would lie about his true father and Chris wouldn't care even if he found out

What if Chris made Peach/Daisy pr0n? Would Nintendo sue him until he crashed into slumber?

His drawings are so horrible that they wouldn't be able to tell who he is drawing

What if Chris was a Bond villain?

He would die in a rather hilarious manner

What if Chris went full weeaboo and bought a cheap katana? Would he go to the Game Place and challenge Snyder to a duel?

The game place is closed so I don't think that would happen

What if Chris made an Anti-CWCki wiki just like what SpleenFat did with Anti-Encyclopedia Dramatica.com?

Weens would vandalize it

What if Chris was in a horror movie? DCB, of course, but would the monster kill him or just troll him?

It would rip out his taint piercing and murder him with it

What if Chris faced something like the contrapasso from Dante's Inferno or the Justice Zone from Red Dwarf? Meaning for every misdeed he did, he'd get a just punishment for it?

Ex.: He uploads SheCameForCWC, someone tries to force themselves on Chris and when he refuses their advances, they upload badly drawn porn of them doing a sex act on Chris.

It seems like that is already happening to him

What if Apple Chrisp played dodgeball?

He would get hit by the ball

What if Chris was a greenskeeper at a golf course and had to kill a gopher?

He would try to have someone else do it

What if Chris got a free bowl of soup for wearing a hat like that?

He would drink all of it

Dead serious here - what if Chris got 20 piece McNuggets at McDonald's for $4.99?

Since he'd have two choices of sauces, what would he get?

Honey mustard and BBQ

What if Chris actually met Tara Strong and tried to give her grief?

He'd stutter a lot and say mmmmm yeah

What if Chris converted to the Catholic Church?

He'd get excommunicated within weeks

What if Chris got a fleshlight?

He probably has one already that he got used off Craigslist

What if Chris is a big fan of the HEX-Box rather than the Playstation?

He'd get arrested for vandalizing ps displays

What if Chris wrote Sonichu without the influence of trolls? I'm curious as to what direction it would have gone.

It would have still been poorly drawn

What if Chris joined a speech club?

The subject of all his speeches would be da trolls and how he is lonely and girlfriend-free.

He'd start his introductory speech with "ya'll should know me by know"

He would get last place at the competition

What if Chris had a more severe form of autism, or a worse mental condition? Would he still be the LOLcow we know and love?

No he'd be nonverbal

What if Chris had a wheelchair? "Tales of the crazy wheeler" In Sonichu he would draw himself as half race car.

He'd break it because he's fat

What if Chris was really the second coming of GodJesus and The Bear?

HI Daniel kimbrell

What if Chris was raised by wolves? Without the ego-enabling of Borb, would he have less trouble than Chris IRL?

No, he'd still be autistic and have no social skills

He'd still think he was thin as he readies the rag on a stick.


My question; What if Chris and A-log go into a fist fight? Who wins?

Chris

What if one of his high school gal-pals gave him a pity fuck after graduation?

He wouldn't be able to get it up

What if instead of McDonalds, Chris frequented Subway? Don't ask me why I thought of this.

He'd be mad that Jared went to jail

What if Chris was a character in Breaking Bad?

He'd contaminate the meth with his poor hygiene

What if we got a Q&A with Tiffany?

She'd tell us Chris is a faggot

H

What if Chris was a character in The Walking Dead?

He would eat the zombies

What if Chris was straight? :fool:

He still wouldn't get laid

What if Chris bought a PS4 on his credit card, but it get's repossessed about a month later?

He'd beg for money

What if Chris could meet ONE celebrity of his choice? Who would he choose?

Doopy

What if Chris was like Fatman and made videos of him eating on YouTube? Would the trolls laugh or be grossed out?

He would throw up on camera

What if Chris went vegan?

He'd still be fat

What if Chris posts on Wizardchan? Would he get banned due to mention of him having sex with a hooker or considered to be a God there?

They would trollshield

 

[Steve Mayers]

what if Chris(tine) skipped Bronycon to counter protest the nazis in Cville?

He'd manage to be attacked by Nazis and ANTIFA.

 

[allisonamber]

What if Chris was born a girl? This has probably been asked before but I couldn't find it

 

[El Santo]

What if they invented a "cure for autism" that helped both low and high functioning autists mental capacity, if maybe temporarily and Chris took it? How would he react once he realized he's very exceptional and all he did?

 

[Demonica]

Redacted

 

[Somar]

What if Megan wasn't real and was just Chris's hallucination?

 

[AnonAutismo]

what if Chris(tine) skipped Bronycon to counter protest the nazis in Cville?

He'd either get the shit beat out of him or greatly exaggerate his role in the event. Maybe both.